Men, how do you feel about SAHM?

I wouldn't have it...........................................because I couldn't be a SAHD anymore! My DW brings home the bacon!!

A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

So this is not some kind of vegetarian "ham" substitute?

I love my wife, whatever she chooses to do. The end.*








*well, not totally. I want someone home with the kids, but I'm okay if that person is me. Actually, I'd be thrilled if it were me. :bigsmile: I believe very strongly in having that immediate and constantly available influence during the early years if it is financially feasible.

It's a great feeling. I get to take my DD to school and pick her up and do homework with her and play and hang out. I think a father/daughter connection is important because from my understanding females tend to gravitate towards men who usually have some of the same traits/behaviors as their fathers.

A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

I love my wife, whatever she chooses to do. The end.*








*well, not totally. I want someone home with the kids, but I'm okay if that person is me. Actually, I'd be thrilled if it were me. :bigsmile: I believe very strongly in having that immediate and constantly available influence during the early years if it is financially feasible.

It's a great feeling. I get to take my DD to school and pick her up and do homework with her and play and hang out. I think a father/daughter connection is important because from my understanding females tend to gravitate towards men who usually have some of the same traits/behaviors as their fathers.

A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

My daughter is the same way, very attached to me, and I am COMPLETELY jealous of you. I'm taking her out to dinner and dancing this weekend (she's nine). She looks forward to this event more than Christmas, and I'm not kidding at all.


edit: Just to add it in, my wife and I felt very strongly that she finish her nursing degree before my career started. So we worked an extra two years wife her going part time and me working night shifts so that one of us could always be home with our first child. I delayed going to work in my field until she was done. No way I wanted her to not have a degree and a possibility to make a stable and desirable income if something were to happen down the road to me (making it not possible to work) or to our marriage (making it harder for our kids, in addition to the hardships that women face in divorce...it's part of being a decent human being who has full buy in to the relationship).

My wife is a SAHM, more than happy for her to do it. It bolis down to for me, that as long as she is happy and is appreciated by both the kid and me. No issues on the ohter hand if she wanted to go back to work full time, the same applies.

Happy wife, Happy life - great rule to live by

What's wrong with being a SAHM? My dd's would be blessed to be able to stay home and raise their children. I work but my husband works from home and cares for our children. No one can take better care of your child than you.

i just can't stomach a child saying "I want to be a stay at home parent when I grow up". If it happens for the right reasons of nurturing and behavioural development concerns, then awesome. But having it as a goal. Can't stop facepalming.

Well, I agree with you there because what if you never get married…. or get a divorce?? Or your husband dies? Then you have no job or education to fall back on, and you struggle just to feed your children.

I love my wife, whatever she chooses to do. The end.*








*well, not totally. I want someone home with the kids, but I'm okay if that person is me. Actually, I'd be thrilled if it were me. :bigsmile: I believe very strongly in having that immediate and constantly available influence during the early years if it is financially feasible.

I've discovered that it's just as important (and maybe more!) to have that immediate and constantly available influence in the teen years, too! I still have one little one all day, but it's good being available to the older kids when they need me, and being home when they first get home from Jr High is a big deal. A lot of people told me "you can always go back to work when your kids are in school" but for us, it's so much better that I'm home even now.

What's wrong with being a SAHM? My dd's would be blessed to be able to stay home and raise their children. I work but my husband works from home and cares for our children. No one can take better care of your child than you.

but he works. That is the point. He is working. Working parents still care for their children.

I would hope so but you can't trust others with your children like you can trust your spouse. My husband doesn't work when I'm at work so he is like any stay at home parent.

I am a SAHM and I also work but I work between school hours and I work twice a week sometimes more if I am needed

i just can't stomach a child saying "I want to be a stay at home parent when I grow up". If it happens for the right reasons of nurturing and behavioural development concerns, then awesome. But having it as a goal. Can't stop facepalming.

The thing that irritated me the most when I chose to stay home with my kids was the people saying "but it's such a waste … you're so smart (etc) that you could be <fill in the blank here>" I am successful just as I am. I don't need a career to make me successful (but I have several somethings to fall back on, if the need arises). And I would never discourage a child from having SAHP as a career goal … but again would remind them to have several options.





ETA: It's ironic, OP, that you bemoaned "I forgot I was asking on an internet forum" but you're the only one really trying to stir the pot.

Success is what ever you want it to be and what ever makes you happy

i just can't stomach a child saying "I want to be a stay at home parent when I grow up". If it happens for the right reasons of nurturing and behavioural development concerns, then awesome. But having it as a goal. Can't stop facepalming.

The thing that irritated me the most when I chose to stay home with my kids was the people saying "but it's such a waste … you're so smart (etc) that you could be <fill in the blank here>" I am successful just as I am. I don't need a career to make me successful (but I have several somethings to fall back on, if the need arises). And I would never discourage a child from having SAHP as a career goal … but again would remind them to have several options.



ETA: It's ironic, OP, that you bemoaned "I forgot I was asking on an internet forum" but you're the only one really trying to stir the pot.

I honestly just don't get it. Clearly I am alone. And that's ok. More power to you guys I guess. But I really don't get it. I especially don't get you saying 'SAHM as a career goal', that sentence makes zero sense to me. Because then saying 'a mom who has a career' would no longer make sense. It messes with my brain. lol.

The only thing you don't seem to get is that there are people out there with different values than your own. Being a mom is admirable, more admirable to many than being an accountant or a nurse or whatever. They want to succeed at being a mom like you want to succeed in your chosen field. it's not so hard to grasp.

I know many moms who chose to be a mom first, but also pick up a couple of shifts as a nurse around their moon duties. They verbally chose mom first, but also are at times "just" staying at home.

Personally I find a stay at home mom to be one of the hardest job in the world. And I don't consider that light responsibility. And to be a stay at home mom for a spouse that's a member of the armed forces is extremely tough. Hardest job in the army as they say I find it to be true. Tip my hat to stay at home moms.

Clearly you just want an argument. And it is clear that you are extremely judgmental. I borrowed (and just finished paying back) almost $100,000 for my education, and I am *just* a SAHM. For eight years I owned my own business and worked out of our home, but when we moved to Singapore I turned the business over to a relative and do nothing but care for my children and home. And I am perfectly happy and content. Which contributes to a very happy family!

Next week I am the lucky lady who gets to help out in my 3rd grader's class, attend two daytime choral concerts an awards assembly and two basketball games, all things I would likely miss if I worked a "regular" job. I get to be the first person every day to hear about how great their days are, and occasionally get to be the first one to console them if they had a bad day.

I'm here to help with homework before the nighttime post-dinner rush. I get to experiment with cooking whenever I want, without throwing something together or in a crockpot while trying to unwind from a busy day at the office (just made a great Thai chicken curry the other night!).

My children are at the top of their classes. One wants to be a video game designer, the other a scientist. But if they wanted to be ME, I'd be pretty happy knowing that - because I have a pretty fabulous life and wouldn't change a thing.

There is nothing wrong with working or staying at home. No need to insult either one here.