chubby or skinny

I believe you were ostracized, and I believe it was a misunderstanding that went awry in group pack behavior. Sometimes groups do turn on someone to build themselves up and form solidarity. But it's not as simple as thin/pretty. Other factors play into it too. (Like being shy and reserved. People misinterpret that as arrogance and then enjoy "putting you in your place" even if it's unfair.)

How does one get that kind of impression about someone she has never even seen before? These were women who had never SEEN ME before. They had never been in the same room before. They would have no way of developing any kind of impression of me. It was based ENTIRELY on what I looked like. There was no other context.

I make eye contact, I shake hands, I introduce myself. I'm standing in front of someone (more than one), asking a question or tryin to make a suggestion and being ignored. You weren't there.

This HAPPENS and it happens based on looks alone. Not every woman does it and not every group of women does it. BUT IT HAPPENS.

Do you think it may have had something to di wtih you being so young also? I'm not meaning that in a derogatory way, just that you were 10-15 years younger than them also and some people are quick to judge people who have children at a young age. Just a thought.

How does one get that kind of impression about someone she has never even seen before? These were women who had never SEEN ME before. They had never been in the same room before. They would have no way of developing any kind of impression of me. It was based ENTIRELY on what I looked like. There was no other context.

I make eye contact, I shake hands, I introduce myself. I'm standing in front of someone (more than one), asking a question or tryin to make a suggestion and being ignored. You weren't there.

This HAPPENS and it happens based on looks alone. Not every woman does it and not every group of women does it. BUT IT HAPPENS.

You're right, I wasn't there. But since you mentioned it and we're discussing it, your theory about why that all happened just doesn't hold up for me.

Unless you and your child materialized in that room out of thin air in that very instant, I think it's far more likely that someone said something nasty about you or heard a rumor or one of a million possibilities. I'm not saying it was a good experience or that you did anything wrong. I just don't think you being thin and pretty caused insecure women to literally pretend to ignore you. You do believe that. We disagree, that's ok.

I'm also not buying that others were terrible to that other person simply because she's pretty. I believe they insulted her looks. I believe there was jealousy. I don't believe that was the only source of the problem. Again, she probably won't agree with me there, but no big deal.

How does one get that kind of impression about someone she has never even seen before? These were women who had never SEEN ME before. They had never been in the same room before. They would have no way of developing any kind of impression of me. It was based ENTIRELY on what I looked like. There was no other context.

I make eye contact, I shake hands, I introduce myself. I'm standing in front of someone (more than one), asking a question or tryin to make a suggestion and being ignored. You weren't there.

This HAPPENS and it happens based on looks alone. Not every woman does it and not every group of women does it. BUT IT HAPPENS.

You're right, I wasn't there. But since you mentioned it and we're discussing it, your theory about why that all happened just doesn't hold up for me.

Unless you and your child materialized in that room out of thin air in that very instant, I think it's far more likely that someone said something nasty about you or heard a rumor or one of a million possibilities. I'm not saying it was a good experience or that you did anything wrong. I just don't think you being thin and pretty caused insecure women to literally pretend to ignore you. You do believe that. We disagree, that's ok.

I'm also not buying that others were terrible to that other person simply because she's pretty. I believe they insulted her looks. I believe there was jealousy. I don't believe that was the only source of the problem. Again, she probably won't agree with me there, but no big deal.

How does one get that kind of impression about someone she has never even seen before? These were women who had never SEEN ME before. They had never been in the same room before. They would have no way of developing any kind of impression of me. It was based ENTIRELY on what I looked like. There was no other context.

I make eye contact, I shake hands, I introduce myself. I'm standing in front of someone (more than one), asking a question or tryin to make a suggestion and being ignored. You weren't there.

This HAPPENS and it happens based on looks alone. Not every woman does it and not every group of women does it. BUT IT HAPPENS.

You're right, I wasn't there. But since you mentioned it and we're discussing it, your theory about why that all happened just doesn't hold up for me.

Unless you and your child materialized in that room out of thin air in that very instant, I think it's far more likely that someone said something nasty about you or heard a rumor or one of a million possibilities. I'm not saying it was a good experience or that you did anything wrong. I just don't think you being thin and pretty caused insecure women to literally pretend to ignore you. You do believe that. We disagree, that's ok.

I'm also not buying that others were terrible to that other person simply because she's pretty. I believe they insulted her looks. I believe there was jealousy. I don't believe that was the only source of the problem. Again, she probably won't agree with me there, but no big deal.

So then what is the impetus of a complete stranger seeing you for the first time ever to treat you that way? Or a group of complete strangers? I smile when I meet people or simply pass by them. Always. I try to be friendly as much as I can. Sometimes it's more difficult than others.

I'm pretty sure I'm approachable, though, because that is how most of my friendships have happened: someone approached me in a crowd where I was too shy to do the approaching. The only thing those women knew about me at the time was what I looked like. That was it. None of them had had a conversation with me ever. Probably none of them knew I existed until that moment, yet they were rude and nasty. What is the motivation in that case if not appearance?

Please give me a better explanation than I seem to have a bad attitude, because I don't. And please explain why ONLY that group of women have treated me that way -- ever.

Ok, if that was the ONLY time this ever happened to you, then it most likely had more to do with THEM, then you. They were most likely a tight knit group of ladies who didn't readily open up their group to newcomers. Maybe they were the type that still lived in HS and didn't accept anyone out of their 'click'. Maybe they were in a deep discussion with each other and were oblivious to anyone else around them.
Who knows what the reason was, but the point some of us are making is that you cant say that they snubbed you because you were thin and pretty. Maybe it was because you looked like you were too young to be a mother, and they had made an assumption that you were lower class because you had a child young. Again, who knows for sure.

But you and the other ladies on here who are insisting that people snub them and they lose jobs because they are "thin and pretty", is just very egotistical. Only someone who prides themselves as being 'thin and pretty' would come to that conclusion.

I am not saying that people don't make assumptions about a person because of their outward appearance. That happens all the time. But it is mostly because of the way they are dressed, or how they carry themselves. And yes, if someone is 200 pounds overweight, many people will assume that they are lazy and don't care about themselves. This is a quite common occurrence.
Also if someone is extremely thin, people may make assumptions that they have an eating disorder Because of society's acceptance of the average person being overweight today, many people will think that a healthy person's weight might be too thin.

So based on weight/size alone, yes, people do make assumptions about people outside the 'norm'.

But this whole- "women hate me because I'm prettier than they are, and are threatened by me" mentality is just so sorority.:noway:

You know, women (in general and there are many exceptions) can be pretty awful when they feel even a twinge of jealousy.

Dismissing this as a possibility for poor treatment of one woman by another is burying one's head in the sand. It happens. It happens enough that people notice.

The one with the highest credit score and deepest wallet.

Hey.. Im fat. I know that no one wants fat people... and I personally know that cute and chubby is an insult. Skinny people get everything in life. Fat people get nothing.