Women... Do's n Don'ts of men approaching you!

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Replies

  • rockky83
    rockky83 Posts: 59
    I was always curious, if you really like someone and want more than a one night stand with them, what do you do when they try to lead you down that path of KIK and sexting? Do you ignore it and divert the conversation, or do you reply and come across as easy lol

    Why should it not? Sexual attraction and intimacy are a natural part of relationships. If that is all it is, then there is an issue. But excluding it completely will make them move on most of the time.

    Well I think you can flirt and have a good time to show interest to keep their level of interest. But banging or sexting on the first go round is going to get her no where long term.

    I'm not saying you should wait until marriage but at least the guy needs to be emotional vested in her to want a relationship.

    you seem wise beyond your years grasshopper
  • soldiergrl_101
    soldiergrl_101 Posts: 2,205 Member
    I was always curious, if you really like someone and want more than a one night stand with them, what do you do when they try to lead you down that path of KIK and sexting? Do you ignore it and divert the conversation, or do you reply and come across as easy lol

    Why should it not? Sexual attraction and intimacy are a natural part of relationships. If that is all it is, then there is an issue. But excluding it completely will make them move on most of the time.

    Well I think you can flirt and have a good time to show interest to keep their level of interest. But banging or sexting on the first go round is going to get her no where long term.

    I'm not saying you should wait until marriage but at least the guy needs to be emotional vested in her to want a relationship.

    Thats what I mean... I am going through a divorce currently so I have been off the market for like 5 years and with him it was never like that we waited a long time. But now that I am trying to date it seems like every guy is perverse and within the first ten min of meeting me or texting me they try to get me to send pics, sext, and stuff and im like seriously wtf. is it socially acceptable now or something, that people just skip right over the hole dating stage and exciting mental 4play and go straight to the nitty gritty. I probably didnt word this correctly but hopefully you understand what i am getting at
  • vasairiah
    vasairiah Posts: 5,187 Member
    I was always curious, if you really like someone and want more than a one night stand with them, what do you do when they try to lead you down that path of KIK and sexting? Do you ignore it and divert the conversation, or do you reply and come across as easy lol

    Why should it not? Sexual attraction and intimacy are a natural part of relationships. If that is all it is, then there is an issue. But excluding it completely will make them move on most of the time.

    Well I think you can flirt and have a good time to show interest to keep their level of interest. But banging or sexting on the first go round is going to get her no where long term.

    I'm not saying you should wait until marriage but at least the guy needs to be emotional vested in her to want a relationship.
    -takes notes-

    Your brain. I like.
    This makes sense. Go on, more. I want to hear more.

    Funny :) I think it goes back to knowing what you want. If you are interested in the long term, take it slow. If you want the fun, than do that too. It's easier for us chics to get emotionally vested in a sexual relationship than for the guy to get emotional. So by slowing it down, it makes the anticipation higher, energy higher and the drive to be exclusive higher.

    Just my humble thoughts :)
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    I was always curious, if you really like someone and want more than a one night stand with them, what do you do when they try to lead you down that path of KIK and sexting? Do you ignore it and divert the conversation, or do you reply and come across as easy lol

    Why should it not? Sexual attraction and intimacy are a natural part of relationships. If that is all it is, then there is an issue. But excluding it completely will make them move on most of the time.

    Well I think you can flirt and have a good time to show interest to keep their level of interest. But banging or sexting on the first go round is going to get her no where long term.

    I'm not saying you should wait until marriage but at least the guy needs to be emotional vested in her to want a relationship.

    Um, your misandry is disgusting. You are lumping all men together as simple minded, sex driven creatures who need to be metered.

    This is what happens when you make stupid choices in men.
  • vasairiah
    vasairiah Posts: 5,187 Member
    I was always curious, if you really like someone and want more than a one night stand with them, what do you do when they try to lead you down that path of KIK and sexting? Do you ignore it and divert the conversation, or do you reply and come across as easy lol

    Why should it not? Sexual attraction and intimacy are a natural part of relationships. If that is all it is, then there is an issue. But excluding it completely will make them move on most of the time.

    Well I think you can flirt and have a good time to show interest to keep their level of interest. But banging or sexting on the first go round is going to get her no where long term.

    I'm not saying you should wait until marriage but at least the guy needs to be emotional vested in her to want a relationship.

    Thats what I mean... I am going through a divorce currently so I have been off the market for like 5 years and with him it was never like that we waited a long time. But now that I am trying to date it seems like every guy is perverse and within the first ten min of meeting me or texting me they try to get me to send pics, sext, and stuff and im like seriously wtf. is it socially acceptable now or something, that people just skip right over the hole dating stage and exciting mental 4play and go straight to the nitty gritty. I probably didnt word this correctly but hopefully you understand what i am getting at


    Sorry it's taking me a while to respond. My iPad died and I'm on my iPhone now.

    I think social media plays a huge role in this. I can't even keep up who all the new ****e apps that come out daily. It's pretty impersonal too. I mean if you think about it we (me you and everyone else on this thread) have no idea who we truly area. Social media is amazing and complicated at the same time. Dating is hard now than ever before. That's why (again IMHO) taking things slowly is better if you are wanting a serious relationship.

    I understand your question better now but don't really have a good answer.
  • vasairiah
    vasairiah Posts: 5,187 Member
    I was always curious, if you really like someone and want more than a one night stand with them, what do you do when they try to lead you down that path of KIK and sexting? Do you ignore it and divert the conversation, or do you reply and come across as easy lol

    Why should it not? Sexual attraction and intimacy are a natural part of relationships. If that is all it is, then there is an issue. But excluding it completely will make them move on most of the time.

    Well I think you can flirt and have a good time to show interest to keep their level of interest. But banging or sexting on the first go round is going to get her no where long term.

    I'm not saying you should wait until marriage but at least the guy needs to be emotional vested in her to want a relationship.

    Um, your misandry is disgusting. You are lumping all men together as simple minded, sex driven creatures who need to be metered.

    This is what happens when you make stupid choices in men.


    Hmm I didn't mean to lump everyone together in the same group. She's talking about wanting a relationship. She doesn't want to sext.

    My thoughts were if you want to sext, hit it.

    If not, wait until you know the person a bit more. I'm not saying wait like a month either.

    True. There are choices made and chics made them as poorly as guys do.
  • soldiergrl_101
    soldiergrl_101 Posts: 2,205 Member
    I was always curious, if you really like someone and want more than a one night stand with them, what do you do when they try to lead you down that path of KIK and sexting? Do you ignore it and divert the conversation, or do you reply and come across as easy lol

    Why should it not? Sexual attraction and intimacy are a natural part of relationships. If that is all it is, then there is an issue. But excluding it completely will make them move on most of the time.

    Well I think you can flirt and have a good time to show interest to keep their level of interest. But banging or sexting on the first go round is going to get her no where long term.

    I'm not saying you should wait until marriage but at least the guy needs to be emotional vested in her to want a relationship.

    Thats what I mean... I am going through a divorce currently so I have been off the market for like 5 years and with him it was never like that we waited a long time. But now that I am trying to date it seems like every guy is perverse and within the first ten min of meeting me or texting me they try to get me to send pics, sext, and stuff and im like seriously wtf. is it socially acceptable now or something, that people just skip right over the hole dating stage and exciting mental 4play and go straight to the nitty gritty. I probably didnt word this correctly but hopefully you understand what i am getting at


    Sorry it's taking me a while to respond. My iPad died and I'm on my iPhone now.

    I think social media plays a huge role in this. I can't even keep up who all the new ****e apps that come out daily. It's pretty impersonal too. I mean if you think about it we (me you and everyone else on this thread) have no idea who we truly area. Social media is amazing and complicated at the same time. Dating is hard now than ever before. That's why (again IMHO) taking things slowly is better if you are wanting a serious relationship.

    I understand your question better now but don't really have a good answer.

    I agree, I used to spend hours on the phone back in the day... but now thanks to social media and texting and everything, when someone calls me for something it actually throws me off because I am so used to texting. I tried Online dating to ease myself into the whole dating scene but then that lasted like a week because everyone just sent me like two word emails like "lets F***" so i found it a waste of time.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    best:

    smile
    confidence
    handing me his wallet



    worst:

    deer in the headlights expression
    girlfriend on arm
    beer breath being too breathy
  • vasairiah
    vasairiah Posts: 5,187 Member
    @reality

    Curious how long should she want to sext if she's interested in a guy?

    What's her best approach to make it work?
  • MysteriousLdy
    MysteriousLdy Posts: 306 Member
    "Hey gurl, you got Kik?"

    I've actually got this exact quote from someone here ;)
    Lol.
    One time I added someone to kik, those messages went STRAIGHT to the gutter... Within like five seconds.
    I went quiet o.o

    I had never heard of kik until this site. Had similar situation as yours..
    Shut it down quick!
    Like.. Seriously graphic messages.
    I was like WAAATTT? Lmao.

    Conclusion:

    1)KIK is for adults only
    2) KIK: Enter at your own risks.
    3) KIK: Graphic messages.You have been warned about this matter. You will be seeing body assets

    Gosh..@_@
  • Noogynoogs
    Noogynoogs Posts: 1,028 Member
    A good sarcastic line
  • MysteriousLdy
    MysteriousLdy Posts: 306 Member
    I was always curious, if you really like someone and want more than a one night stand with them, what do you do when they try to lead you down that path of KIK and sexting? Do you ignore it and divert the conversation, or do you reply and come across as easy lol

    Good question.. If we okay to kik with men, does it means we are easy for that sextext as well as free pics from men??
    Umm..
  • MysteriousLdy
    MysteriousLdy Posts: 306 Member
    Thinking i should download kik

    :huh: :huh: Wow! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Noogynoogs
    Noogynoogs Posts: 1,028 Member
    Kik smacks of "desperation" to me lol
  • saaber13
    saaber13 Posts: 597 Member
    slip on a banana peel and my shirt accidentally falls out revealing my abs
  • surfinbird_1981
    surfinbird_1981 Posts: 946 Member
    I prefer younger guys so I tend to approach them :devil:
  • TattooedNici
    TattooedNici Posts: 2,141 Member
    First, don't come up to me belching in my face, and expecting me to give you my number. The pick up lines of where I'm questioning if you're a stalker or a rapist doesn't fly, either. It doesn't help your case if you're wearing a wedding band when trying to approach me. Oy.

    I do appreciate someone that's sincere and have manners, though. Good looks help and proper hygiene goes a long way. :)
  • MysteriousLdy
    MysteriousLdy Posts: 306 Member
    Kik smacks of "desperation" to me lol

    I guess so..

    Let's see if we,ladies, receive PM from a good-looking sexy,hot body with 6-8 abs that want to kik! Do you jump straight into Kik? You know there will be some 'hot' chat and graphic involve :bigsmile: :bigsmile:

    Just curious..That's all :laugh: :laugh:
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    I was at a bar once, and this guy walked up to order a drink. He said, "I've been in battle for a fortnight, and I have a king's thirst for the frothy brew!" I thought this was hilarious, and I loved that he could quote the movie "Cable Guy." Definite yes when he asked me out. :smile:
  • nikki0753
    nikki0753 Posts: 383 Member
    I was at a bar once, and this guy walked up to order a drink. He said, "I've been in battle for a fortnight, and I have a king's thirst for the frothy brew!" I thought this was hilarious, and I loved that he could quote the movie "Cable Guy." Definite yes when he asked me out. :smile:

    Lol Yeah stuff like this! Something random that will make me laugh.

    Worst is someone yelling something like 'yo!' or 'oi' from across the street.
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  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,021 Member
    hUVmhZ5.jpg

    In all seriousness, you guys can't be that freaking clueless about how to talk to a woman. Be confident, be polite (truly, y'all have no idea how much you will stand out just by exhibiting proper manners), don't be a pervert (in your manner of speech or your demeanor), and don't be an *kitten* if she is not into you. Take it like a man and walk away. That pretty much covers it.
  • kirili3
    kirili3 Posts: 244 Member
    The very best tip is to imagine a man doing to you whatever you're doing to the person you're trying to ask out.

    "Would you like to go for a coffee sometime?" would probably be best. And if they say no, just shrug it off and move on.

    The "no"s are mainly clear: no yelling, whispering or touching, because it's scary. Imagine a man doing to you whatever you're doing to her, that should let you know about the creepy factor.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    buy me a drink - lots of em!
  • leantool
    leantool Posts: 365 Member
    [quote

    Worst: Any variation on "Hey, girl/baby/woman." And elevator eyes. Sleazy.
    [/quote]
    This
  • smushymushy85
    smushymushy85 Posts: 59
    For me I do not really like being approached at all .. it is rude ... you see someone on the bus headphones in .. that is not body language for " hey come talk to me " ... I dont mind being approached if im at a dog park or something and the person has something more intelligent to say than hey baby can I getcho numbahhh
    but for the most part im out clearly im busy go away
    (Unless you look like chris evans in which case please come say hi)
  • BlueAngelChar
    BlueAngelChar Posts: 1,364 Member
    for me.. its simple , a smile and keep eye contact

    a big no - cheesy chat up lines
  • MissTattoo
    MissTattoo Posts: 1,203 Member
    Worst: I'm sick of white girls. I've always wanted to try a black/mixed girl.
    (You wouldn't believe the number of times this happens. It's disturbing)

    Best: Approach me like a human and not a piece of meat. "Hello, my name is ______. I wanted to introduce myself when I saw you across the room. How are you?"
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    Best: make an obscure reference to a funny movie I like. Instant inside joke sort of thing. Geeky humor.

    Worst: Any variation on "Hey, girl/baby/woman." And elevator eyes. Sleazy.

    I totally agree. Shared interests and humor go a long way.
  • Trad_Barbie
    Trad_Barbie Posts: 166 Member
    Me showing up to work after my morning dose of caffeine

    Me showing up to work after having forgotten to purchase more coffee.....

    Caffeinated- sunrise in the Tetons.
    NOT Caffeinated- that volcano in Yellowstone going off.

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