How many dates should a guy pay for?

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Replies

  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,779 Member
    Whoever has more money should pay. The poor shouldnt be treating others out to dinner much anyway.
    Just because one has less money does not give them the right to mooch off the one that has more.

    Edit: DANG IT, brain... -shakes fist-

    I have known of women who accept offers for dates solely for the free meal.
  • ashandstuff
    ashandstuff Posts: 442 Member
    I was always told growing up that they guy should pay.

    In my (albeit limited) experience, it really doesn't matter. If he offers to pay, I let him. If he doesn't offer I pay my own share, no questions asked. The one time I paid my own meal though, I left the date thinking the guy was uninterested in seeing me again because he didn't even offer to pay at all....

    For me, I guess it's not so much having him pay for everything all the time but offering to. Not sure, it's just a mental thing for me about southern hospitality? After the first date, I would insist on alternating the bill from that point.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Whoever has more money should pay. The poor shouldnt be treating others out to dinner much anyway.
    Just because one has less money does not give them the right to mooch off the one that has more.

    Edit: DANG IT, brain... -shakes fist-

    I have known of women who accept offers for dates solely for the free meal.
    You must have met my mother.
  • kmestripez
    kmestripez Posts: 7 Member
    I was raised in that the man should pay for all dates. However, times have changed and women make just as much money and take on as much responsibility as men. I would say the man should pay for the first date and the rest should be discussed so no one is thrown off guard or comes unprepared. I don't think it's fair to agree to go on a date and then tell the other person that they're paying.
  • laurajane19901
    laurajane19901 Posts: 112
    On first dates I've always offered to pay my way but the guy has usually refused to let me. Then it just seems to progress the longer you date - now we'll either split the bill or take turns paying.

    On the other hand I have a friend who won't pay for anything and even after years of being with her fella she makes him pay for everything. I don't agree with it but everyone's different.
  • ThomRhodes
    ThomRhodes Posts: 32 Member
    My last date consisted of us having a debit card war, we pretended they were swords and we was fighting for the honour of paying for the meal. During the meal.

    Edit: She's now my girlfriend. She pays for half of everything, but still.
  • azyzzam
    azyzzam Posts: 36
    1st: guy (but girl should offer to split)
    2nd: guy (but girl should offer to split)
    later on, I think the girl should definitely "take care of it" occasionally
  • Slendermike
    Slendermike Posts: 1,776 Member
    all of them
  • Me2FitMe
    Me2FitMe Posts: 1,285 Member
    I usually pay for dates until we are officially dating. But I have friends who split down the middle from the first date. Then I met women who wanted to pay half from get-go cuz they thought otherwise they'd owe me something. How about you?

    I usually go prepared to pay... just in case. But if he offers or pays before I offer... than I will not deny him that. I will be grateful but I will certainly not feel like I owe him anything...
  • embrace_the_dark_side
    embrace_the_dark_side Posts: 236
    They pay.

    I'm providing the entertainment
  • thatonegirlwiththestuff
    thatonegirlwiththestuff Posts: 1,171 Member
    I think it's whoever asks the other out. I actually did ask a guy out and did pay for dinner. I have never done that before, and I think I emasculated him a bit with it, although I liked it. It's cool though, he's been paying for the others since then. :love:
  • salladeve
    salladeve Posts: 1,053 Member
    I guess I'm old fashioned, but the guy should always pay when dating. When I'm serious with someone, I usually do a lot of cooking, I enjoy it and it is a way to show someone how much you care about them. When we go out though they pay.
  • sentaruu
    sentaruu Posts: 2,206 Member
    new dates? all of them.

    I've almost always paid for dinner dates. sometimes if it's lunch or coffee i'll let her pay but that usually isn't until later in the relationship.

    (it is, however, a turn off when a lady expects me to pay)
  • SwashBlogger
    SwashBlogger Posts: 395 Member
    Guys pay for outings. However, a decent woman would be happy to spend a lot of evenings/afternoons doing super inexpensive stuff. If you want big, fancy dinners, concerts, etc in exchange for your company you may be a call girl.
  • BurntCoffee
    BurntCoffee Posts: 234 Member
    All of them. BUT girls also need to realize that men are not made of money and offer to make dinner for them for a date night in. :)
  • TwinkieDong
    TwinkieDong Posts: 1,564 Member
    I would say depends on who you are dating. If they are a foreigner then you should google the dating expectations there. For American born people. I would say women should pay the first 4-5 dates at least. Then the man could pay for 1 if she is really nice.
  • TwinkieDong
    TwinkieDong Posts: 1,564 Member
    In all seriousness, my time is just as valuable as anyone else. I would agree with who ever asks the other out should pay first. Then after that 50/50 or I pay this time you pay next time. According to this survey below women are cheap.


    http://www.businessinsider.com/men-think-women-should-pay-on-dates-2013-8#!I4tt5

    A new study out of Chapman University in California says that nearly two-thirds of men believe women should contribute to dating expenses.
    The paper — titled "Who Pays for Dates?" — was based on survey data from 17,000 heterosexual and unmarried participants, 4,000 of whom provided written responses.

    The study found that 64% of the men surveyed believe that women should pay their own way on dates, with 44% admitting that they would stop dating a woman who never paid.

    Yet even though the majority of men believe women should be going Dutch, 84% of the male respondents said that they pay for most of the dating expenses.

    The women surveyed seemed more conflicted. While 57% of women said they offer to pay on dates, 39% confessed that they secretly hoped the man would still pay.

    But the conventions of dating can only last so long. As relationships progress, 40% of both men and women say that they begin to at least partially share dating expenses within the first month and 83% of women reported sharing expenses by six months of dating.



    Read more: http://www.businessinsider.com/men-think-women-should-pay-on-dates-2013-8#ixzz30sRhDRg9
  • Autk79
    Autk79 Posts: 286 Member
    Maybe Im old fashioned but I think the guy should be paying untill you are really serious. Once you are together all the time, or live together or are married then 50/50. I will always bring money with me in case but Id prob never go on a date again if I had to pay the first couple times.. but maybe thats just me. If I called a guy and said hey lets go to a concert or baseball game then Id pay but other than that, its prob not gonna happen
  • laynerich15
    laynerich15 Posts: 1,918 Member
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  • 1PatientBear
    1PatientBear Posts: 2,089 Member
    All of them. BUT girls also need to realize that men are not made of money and offer to make dinner for them for a date night in. :)

    Ummmm....no. I will pay for the first few dates, but after that, she needs to pony up as well. I have financial responsibilities just like she does and I'm not going to be her sugar daddy. If she doesn't pay on the 4th or 5th date, I'm out.

    The other part of that is I always want a woman to OFFER to pay on our first date. I would never let her, but someone who doesn't at least offer sends up a red flag.
  • TwinkieDong
    TwinkieDong Posts: 1,564 Member
    Maybe Im old fashioned but I think the guy should be paying untill you are really serious. Once you are together all the time, or live together or are married then 50/50. I will always bring money with me in case but Id prob never go on a date again if I had to pay the first couple times.. but maybe thats just me. If I called a guy and said hey lets go to a concert or baseball game then Id pay but other than that, its prob not gonna happen

    so then your father would pay for the marriage? Old fashion is old fashion.....right?
  • rm33064
    rm33064 Posts: 270 Member
    I will usually insist on paying for everything, but if the woman doesn't offer to at least leave the tip I won't call her again.... After I've slept with her that is. :bigsmile:
  • Autk79
    Autk79 Posts: 286 Member
    Yes mam, he would pay for both mine and my sisters wedding
  • trojan_bb
    trojan_bb Posts: 699 Member
    All.

    Can't remember the last time I didn't pay for a date. Even after 'dating' for multiple years. Probably I can't remember because it never happened.


    Ummmm....no. I will pay for the first few dates, but after that, she needs to pony up as well. I have financial responsibilities just like she does and I'm not going to be her sugar daddy. If she doesn't pay on the 4th or 5th date, I'm out.

    The other part of that is I always want a woman to OFFER to pay on our first date. I would never let her, but someone who doesn't at least offer sends up a red flag.

    Honestly, a woman offering on the first few dates to pay is insulting. For several reasons. 1) it's usually not a genuine offer. You know the type...the casual oh let me slowly reach for my purse while you quickly get your credit card. 2) Do I not look well-mannered and successful enough to pay?

    An offer after the first few dates is fine. I will always refuse, but the offer is appreciated.
  • Autk79
    Autk79 Posts: 286 Member
    Ive never put out on a first date and never had someone not pay the first date. It was just how I was raised I guess.
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
    I dunno. He paid for dinner, I paid for breakfast.
  • kristinsnm
    kristinsnm Posts: 67 Member
    No rule, but it's nice to have the offer.... I'm a person who believes it should all even out, but there is still that nice feeling that comes from being treated like a princess lol

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