How do you feel about fat pride?
Replies
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Try taking a middle seat on a transcontinental flight between 2 people who cannot fit in their own seats and you'll see what I mean. It's not just annoying; it's downright painful.
This is my big complaint and why I hate flying.
I paid for my seat, not yours, so I stay in mine.
You paid for your seat, not mine.....so keep your rolls to yourself.
I hate to be rude about it....but damn, come on.
It is cramped enough as it is....and if I want to use an arm rest, but can't cause your muffin top is in my way....
It makes me very mad :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:0 -
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.I knew I should not read this thread its filled with so much disgusting that I cannot even deal right now
also just want to point out that I am currently fat and considered perfectly healthy (aside from my chronic illnesses that I have no matter what my size or "health")
just because when you were fat you were miserable DOES NOT MEAN EVERY FAT PERSON IS MISERABLE YOU ARE NOT THEM YOU DO NOT KNOW THEM YOU WILL NEVER KNOW your experience does not equal someone elses. Just because you were not happy does not mean they cannot be perfectly happy as a 300 pound person. Just because you think they do not deserve to be happy and you think they need to change their body you think their body is not good DOES NOT MEAN THEY HAVE TO DO WHAT YOU THINK IS BEST DOES NOT MEAN THEY HAVE TO CHANGE (to fit what you see as okay to fit what you think is healthy to fit what you think is acceptable) HOLY SSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!T
people need to stop thinking their opinions of other peoples bodies and health actually matter . people need to stop projecting their own self hate on to other people and their own body expectations on to other people
just stop fat acceptance is extremely needed and anyone who says otherwise needs to shut up sit down and mind their own damn business
The more I read, the more I fumed, at some of the vain glorious, self righteous, BS some of them are mouthing.
this weekend my sister told me I am too "skinny" and I "look gross"
she is 300 lbs and I wanted to tell her she was too fat but I held my tongue.....
seriously, I can relate.. and its sad because the vast majority now of America is FAT and doesn't even realize it!!
I guess I'm lucky my doctor is Russian and is just very blunt and candid with me - but America is disgusting, between the ridiculous diets- I mean fast food should NEVER EVER be consumed and we have an entire culture around fast food? WHAT DA FAQ?!
...her point reminds me of hitting up my friends pool party... I pull my shirt off all excited to show off months of hard work - instead I get my buddies gf' eye r@ping me, and grief from all the guys that I'm too skinny...
...too skinny... being at an ideal physical performance level is now ..too skinny...
as they are slugging beer and eating steak like they all just put in a two hour workout as well...
there should be zero fat pride. there should be pride in being healthy.. "healthy pride" and if you are really healthy then by all means celebrate - but this fat pride nonsense does nothing but pervert the word 'pride' because its changing its meaning. to include 'despite' now as in 'despite' being fat.0 -
*sigh* I usually stay out of the forums, but this popped up in my sidebar this morning and I couldn't resist.
Here's the thing with shaming...no one can "shame" you. You already feel shame, and when someone points out something you already hate about yourself, it just brings it to the surface. So, anyone who claims to be "fat-shamed"...you already are ashamed about that aspect of yourself. If you honestly love your body, love the fact that you are fat, then you won't care what anyone says in regard to your physique.
I've seen a lot of claims throughout this thread regarding fat and/or obesity and health. "But I'm fat and healthy!! My blood work is fine!!" Good for you. Let me ask you a few questions. When was the last time you had an ultrasound on your carotid arteries? An EKG? How are your joints feeling? How tired are you? How much sugar are you craving? And the ultimate question...how long do you think that good blood work is going to last? Mine lasted until I was 32. Some, of course, go much longer depending on family history and lifestyle.
Now, for the Fat Acceptance/Fat Pride/Healthy At Every Size Movement (HAES)....that's an interesting can of worms. Out of morbid (see what I did there?) curiosity, I checked out a variety of blogs from some of the leaders of the movement. While there is a lot of talk regarding acceptance and pride, there is a disturbing amount of childish vitriol towards anyone who does not agree with their position, or, in some cases, just with women who are not of size. I recommend Googling Dances With Fat, This is Thin Privilege, The Fat Nutritionist (this one just blows my mind), and check out #notyourgoodfatty on Twitter.
I'm all for loving who you are, but honesty should play a part in it.
I'm fat and I'm one who "claimed" to be healthy in this thread.
My heart is great, it's been checked recently. I have no joint issues at all and I sleep fantastically. I only "crave" sugar when it's Shark Week - and I'm in control of those (if I have the calories, I have a treat, it not - no dice).
Even my doctor remarked about my health vs. my weight.
I'm completely and totally against shaming of *any* sort and I find it so hypocritical that an overweight person would perpetuate that sort of behavior (not saying I don't believe you, I do).
I'm not sure how I feel about the shaming part - like I said earlier, I've never been fat shamed. I'm starting to think it's because I never *expected* people to be mean to me because I was fat - so I didn't interpret their actions through that looking glass? I think if you expect people to treat you a certain way, it will happen - because you're looking for it and assigning their motives for them (does that make ANY sense?).
I don't know. I generally dislike people being made fun of or talked down to because of their looks - and that's happening in this thread a lot. I should just stay away, I know - but I feel compelled to speak up for people who don't have the guts to do so themselves. A lot of people on here are fat - and working hard to change that, and it might hit home.0 -
I think "fat pride" is a bit of a misnomer. I've never come across anyone that has been actively proud of being overweight. I think the purpose is to encourage people to find their inner strength/worth, while being fat. Not letting the label define all aspects of their life.
Which, IMO is really important. I'm overweight. I was diagnosed with "severe depression". I started treatment immediately. It was about six weeks later that I started liking who I was - finding worth in myself. Which led to me wanting to live a healthier lifestyle, which lead me here (20 pounds lighter so far).
You have to feel like you're worth it - why else would you pursue living a healthier life? You can't change and make better choices until you've decided to invest in yourself. That's what I feel like this "movement" (or whatever it is) is about.
All my opinion, of course.
I agree with you except for the part that that's what the movement is about.
I am just skeptical as to whether they just mean that people should love and care about their minds and bodies, which of course everyone should, or whether they go further and say it's okay to be physically unhealthy.
Otherwise, I agree with everything else that you've said. Fighting depression has led to making other healthy changes. If people are hurt about their weight, they will have to find their comfort somewhere, and for people who have been big all their lives like me, that comfort is in food. I'm fully behind the idea of self-acceptance, but for example there's a girl on there who has type 1 diabetes but it okay with being overweight. I understand that it's very hard to lose weight, especially if one is taking insulin (it's like trying to turn back the tide, though some people seem to really try and actually do), but being okay with it doesn't help. It's the physical side that's difficult to deal with, but trying to make it part of a movement toward self-acceptance seems counter-productive.
Basically, these people seem more like ones who self-identify as big as part of their identity, rather than people trying to be happy within themselves. People who understand and appreciate themselves also often want to move towards being physically healthy too.0 -
*sigh* I usually stay out of the forums, but this popped up in my sidebar this morning and I couldn't resist.
Here's the thing with shaming...no one can "shame" you. You already feel shame, and when someone points out something you already hate about yourself, it just brings it to the surface. So, anyone who claims to be "fat-shamed"...you already are ashamed about that aspect of yourself. If you honestly love your body, love the fact that you are fat, then you won't care what anyone says in regard to your physique.
I've seen a lot of claims throughout this thread regarding fat and/or obesity and health. "But I'm fat and healthy!! My blood work is fine!!" Good for you. Let me ask you a few questions. When was the last time you had an ultrasound on your carotid arteries? An EKG? How are your joints feeling? How tired are you? How much sugar are you craving? And the ultimate question...how long do you think that good blood work is going to last? Mine lasted until I was 32. Some, of course, go much longer depending on family history and lifestyle.
Now, for the Fat Acceptance/Fat Pride/Healthy At Every Size Movement (HAES)....that's an interesting can of worms. Out of morbid (see what I did there?) curiosity, I checked out a variety of blogs from some of the leaders of the movement. While there is a lot of talk regarding acceptance and pride, there is a disturbing amount of childish vitriol towards anyone who does not agree with their position, or, in some cases, just with women who are not of size. I recommend Googling Dances With Fat, This is Thin Privilege, The Fat Nutritionist (this one just blows my mind), and check out #notyourgoodfatty on Twitter.
I'm all for loving who you are, but honesty should play a part in it.
I'm fat and I'm one who "claimed" to be healthy in this thread.
My heart is great, it's been checked recently. I have no joint issues at all and I sleep fantastically. I only "crave" sugar when it's Shark Week - and I'm in control of those (if I have the calories, I have a treat, it not - no dice).
Even my doctor remarked about my health vs. my weight.
I'm completely and totally against shaming of *any* sort and I find it so hypocritical that an overweight person would perpetuate that sort of behavior (not saying I don't believe you, I do).
I'm not sure how I feel about the shaming part - like I said earlier, I've never been fat shamed. I'm starting to think it's because I never *expected* people to be mean to me because I was fat - so I didn't interpret their actions through that looking glass? I think if you expect people to treat you a certain way, it will happen - because you're looking for it and assigning their motives for them (does that make ANY sense?).
I don't know. I generally dislike people being made fun of or talked down to because of their looks - and that's happening in this thread a lot. I should just stay away, I know - but I feel compelled to speak up for people who don't have the guts to do so themselves. A lot of people on here are fat - and working hard to change that, and it might hit home.
^celebrate your health.
Fat shaming is wrong.
When it comes to close friends or family, and they are obese - I do confront them... I don't do it publicly, I don't do it meanly, I mention how I can relate.
One of my old best friends has a heroine problem... Kensington Philly is basically his hangout.. I saw he was slowly dying and becoming a depressed different person so I pulled him aside and respectfully told him that he has no idea of the consequences he will be facing because of the choices he is currently making. I then proceeded to tell him I am going to have to stay away from him and out of his life because I only surround myself with ppl I want to emulate and be more like.
My buddy just celebrated 3 months of sobriety.
I don't think anyone here has been 'fat shaming' ... this 'fat pride' thing though is a farce I don't think its wrong to be vocal about that.
PPL need to get thicker skin... ;P ...when confronted.
Also.. if your fat and healthy as I've said then call it "healthy pride" ... this 'fat pride' is perverting the meaning of the word.0 -
Yeah, they're proud of being fat but if they woke up one morning and they were suddenly slim and fit, I bet they wouldn't be complaining.0
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You relate to them.... confrontationally?0
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^celebrate your health.
Fat shaming is wrong.
When it comes to close friends or family, and they are obese - I do confront them... I don't do it publicly, I don't do it meanly, I mention how I can relate.
One of my old best friends has a heroine problem... Kensington Philly is basically his hangout.. I saw he was slowly dying and becoming a depressed different person so I pulled him aside and respectfully told him that he has no idea of the consequences he will be facing because of the choices he is currently making. I then proceeded to tell him I am going to have to stay away from him and out of his life because I only surround myself with ppl I want to emulate and be more like.
My buddy just celebrated 3 months of sobriety.
I don't think anyone here has been 'fat shaming' ... this 'fat pride' thing though is a farce I don't think its wrong to be vocal about that.
PPL need to get thicker skin... ;P ...when confronted.
Also.. if your fat and healthy as I've said then call it "healthy pride" ... this 'fat pride' is perverting the meaning of the word.
I do celebrate my health - while working my *kitten* off to make it even better.
I can see why someone would reach out and try to help a loved one, that makes sense to me.
I don't have "fat pride" - I just have pride. I'm a good person who has done some pretty amazing things - that's what I find pride in. Not everyone can though. Some people allow their weight to define them and have trouble finding their worth in other areas - that is what *I* think this stuff is all about. Not being proud that you're fat.
Also, you think people need thicker skin - I think people generally need to be kinder.0 -
You relate to them.... confrontationally?
mhm. I used to have substance abuse problems myself, they know I'm speaking from my heart when I confront them, but I am a blunt/direct person... this dancing around the subject nonsense doesn't work for me.
You confront the problem not the person- and I confront it hardcore... because I love the person and ABHOR the problem.
This is the case for obesity & substance abuse - both lead to depression, and once you are in a lifestyle of depression you get into a cycle of abuse.0 -
I'm fairly certain he surrounds himself with people, who get where he's coming from and who are similar to him personality-wise. Picking apart stuff or choosing a tiny detail to derail the main portion of his message is quite silly in my opinion. Earlier he stated that he doesn't confront anyone in public and when he does, he remains respectful and that's what I chose to read from his message. This was a comment to velvet.You relate to them.... confrontationally?
mhm. I used to have substance abuse problems myself, they know I'm speaking from my heart when I confront them, but I am a blunt/direct person... this dancing around the subject nonsense doesn't work for me.
You confront the problem not the person- and I confront it hardcore... because I love the person and ABHOR the problem.
This is the case for obesity & substance abuse - both lead to depression, and once you are in a lifestyle of depression you get into a cycle of abuse.0 -
I'm fairly certain he surrounds himself with people, who get where he's coming from and who are similar to him personality-wise. Picking apart stuff or choosing a tiny detail to derail the main portion of his message is quite silly in my opinion. Earlier he stated that he doesn't confront anyone in public and when he does, he remains respectful and that's what I chose to read from his message. This was a comment to velvet.You relate to them.... confrontationally?
mhm. I used to have substance abuse problems myself, they know I'm speaking from my heart when I confront them, but I am a blunt/direct person... this dancing around the subject nonsense doesn't work for me.
You confront the problem not the person- and I confront it hardcore... because I love the person and ABHOR the problem.
This is the case for obesity & substance abuse - both lead to depression, and once you are in a lifestyle of depression you get into a cycle of abuse.
It was an honest question about someone espousing their participation in two almost mutually exclusive actions.0 -
^celebrate your health.
Fat shaming is wrong.
When it comes to close friends or family, and they are obese - I do confront them... I don't do it publicly, I don't do it meanly, I mention how I can relate.
One of my old best friends has a heroine problem... Kensington Philly is basically his hangout.. I saw he was slowly dying and becoming a depressed different person so I pulled him aside and respectfully told him that he has no idea of the consequences he will be facing because of the choices he is currently making. I then proceeded to tell him I am going to have to stay away from him and out of his life because I only surround myself with ppl I want to emulate and be more like.
My buddy just celebrated 3 months of sobriety.
I don't think anyone here has been 'fat shaming' ... this 'fat pride' thing though is a farce I don't think its wrong to be vocal about that.
PPL need to get thicker skin... ;P ...when confronted.
Also.. if your fat and healthy as I've said then call it "healthy pride" ... this 'fat pride' is perverting the meaning of the word.
Also, you think people need thicker skin - I think people generally need to be kinder.
^maybe its a little of this and a lot of that.
I can work on coming across as kinder :flowerforyou:
"I don't have "fat pride" - I just have pride. I'm a good person who has done some pretty amazing things - that's what I find pride in. Not everyone can though. Some people allow their weight to define them and have trouble finding their worth in other areas - that is what *I* think this stuff is all about. Not being proud that you're fat. "
I think if someone defines themself by their weight, their is a serious lack of maturity... Character should of course be the highest measure of self-value... BUT I was just talking to a bunch of high schoolers in a near by school last week and said this - if you want to have success you have to label what you view success is.
for me its being beyond just financially secure, its having the frivolities that separates me from peers, the designer clothes, insane watch..
..finding the women that I can view as a partner/equal/teammate vrs just another girl..
constantly adapting, constantly being willing to learn and grow
and having character
^ but none of that can be achieved without SELF-CONTROL. - I drummed this into the kids imagination.. (rocking armani pants, Thomas Pink Dress shirt, and Hermes tie
)
so I use that as a tell in all area's of my life.. self-control is paramount-once you can master yourself you can master anything.
Thats why I come across as tough, its because they may be a great person in all these area's lots of integrity, lots of loyalty, but with a lack of self-control its all meaningless.
happy to hear your a good person and done amazing things. ..I also think your a good person & your teaching me a thing or two on communication so keep it up! :drinker:0 -
It reminds me a bit of the claims by smokers that they're being oppressed by the anti-smoking movement. If it was simply to respond to body shaming and to encourage people to love themselves, I'd be completely supportive, but it goes beyond that into denying reality, and no being obese isn't healthy.0
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I'm fairly certain he surrounds himself with people, who get where he's coming from and who are similar to him personality-wise. Picking apart stuff or choosing a tiny detail to derail the main portion of his message is quite silly in my opinion. Earlier he stated that he doesn't confront anyone in public and when he does, he remains respectful and that's what I chose to read from his message. This was a comment to velvet.You relate to them.... confrontationally?
mhm. I used to have substance abuse problems myself, they know I'm speaking from my heart when I confront them, but I am a blunt/direct person... this dancing around the subject nonsense doesn't work for me.
You confront the problem not the person- and I confront it hardcore... because I love the person and ABHOR the problem.
This is the case for obesity & substance abuse - both lead to depression, and once you are in a lifestyle of depression you get into a cycle of abuse.
I used to be a drug addict, a terrible terrible person and its very embarrassing to look back on. I have friends all over the board, successful businessman, to former gang-bangers-and to this day I can relate to them all.
I LOVE people, and I'm direct but always respectful to them, publicly and privately.
On these forums I will work on coming across as showing more empathy.0 -
I'm fairly certain he surrounds himself with people, who get where he's coming from and who are similar to him personality-wise. Picking apart stuff or choosing a tiny detail to derail the main portion of his message is quite silly in my opinion. Earlier he stated that he doesn't confront anyone in public and when he does, he remains respectful and that's what I chose to read from his message. This was a comment to velvet.You relate to them.... confrontationally?
mhm. I used to have substance abuse problems myself, they know I'm speaking from my heart when I confront them, but I am a blunt/direct person... this dancing around the subject nonsense doesn't work for me.
You confront the problem not the person- and I confront it hardcore... because I love the person and ABHOR the problem.
This is the case for obesity & substance abuse - both lead to depression, and once you are in a lifestyle of depression you get into a cycle of abuse.
It was an honest question about someone espousing their participation in two almost mutually exclusive actions.
'mutually exclusive actions' ... You can attack a problem and be highly confrontational... I do it every day at work... all the while I still treat the other person with respect and dignity - they are a human being after-all.
Conflict-management 101..0 -
I am all for people being accepted regardless of their size. I try not to be a judgmental person because that is how I would want to be treated. I am not happy with how I look but my size doesn't define who I am. So, if there are some that feel that need extra acceptance for their size, so be it. For me, pride comes in what I can do to make myself a better person, inside and out. ijs0
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It reminds me a bit of the claims by smokers that they're being oppressed by the anti-smoking movement. If it was simply to respond to body shaming and to encourage people to love themselves, I'd be completely supportive, but it goes beyond that into denying reality, and no being obese isn't healthy.
I agree with you (as a recent quitter) - but where do you see these people denying reality? (this is a genuine question - all I've done is read the article in the OP and I'm curious, especially since I've been defending it the whole time thinking it was just encouragement)0 -
I believe that if someone is 'okay' being fat and is unwilling to change,there is no need to tear them DOWN because of that.Eventually,they're only harming their own selves (or mostly...in before taxes for healthcare expenditure). Also,a lot of people actually do have hormonal/genetic problems too.
HOWEVER, if they're really trying to convince people that obesity is not a severely unhealthy state (or worse,some people,especially women trying to convince people that they should be considered as attractive as fitter girls - like natural preference can even be impacted by some 'movement') then I'm NOT having it.
Not trash you because it's your choice? OKAY. Consider you healthy and attractive? GTFO.
Basically,that 'movement' seems BS to me.0 -
It reminds me a bit of the claims by smokers that they're being oppressed by the anti-smoking movement. If it was simply to respond to body shaming and to encourage people to love themselves, I'd be completely supportive, but it goes beyond that into denying reality, and no being obese isn't healthy.
I agree with you (as a recent quitter) - but where do you see these people denying reality? (this is a genuine question - all I've done is read the article in the OP and I'm curious, especially since I've been defending it the whole time thinking it was just encouragement)
Being obese is healthy? It's not even reasonably debatable0 -
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Goes for all the COPD patients, too. Most are there because of their own choices.Just don't ask me to pay for "accepting" your lifestyle. By that I mean I don't want to be asked, through my taxes, to fund your healthcare because of your lifestyle.0 -
It reminds me a bit of the claims by smokers that they're being oppressed by the anti-smoking movement. If it was simply to respond to body shaming and to encourage people to love themselves, I'd be completely supportive, but it goes beyond that into denying reality, and no being obese isn't healthy.
I agree with you (as a recent quitter) - but where do you see these people denying reality? (this is a genuine question - all I've done is read the article in the OP and I'm curious, especially since I've been defending it the whole time thinking it was just encouragement)
Being obese is healthy? It's not even reasonably debatable
Er no - not that part.
I must have misunderstood your post, disregard.0 -
Just don't ask me to pay for "accepting" your lifestyle. By that I mean I don't want to be asked, through my taxes, to fund your healthcare because of your lifestyle.
^if there is one good thing.. at lest now preventive care is something I literally have to partake in because I literally can't fit being sick into my budget...
...clothes&beingfit>ickylifestyle&doctorappointments
#andimnotevenarepublican0 -
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Fat pride is stupid, and idiotic.
BODY acceptance is a great movement. No matter the size, shape, height, color, etc of your BODY, you should be proud of it.0 -
It reminds me a bit of the claims by smokers that they're being oppressed by the anti-smoking movement. If it was simply to respond to body shaming and to encourage people to love themselves, I'd be completely supportive, but it goes beyond that into denying reality, and no being obese isn't healthy.
I agree with you (as a recent quitter) - but where do you see these people denying reality? (this is a genuine question - all I've done is read the article in the OP and I'm curious, especially since I've been defending it the whole time thinking it was just encouragement)
Being obese is healthy? It's not even reasonably debatable
Er no - not that part.
I must have misunderstood your post, disregard.
Again, if it's solely about self love then I'm very much for it, if for no other reason that it is through the love of ourselves that we seek to change what we can about ourselves that causes us pain or illness. My issue is that it seems to me that by denying the reality of the health risks it becomes an excuse not to change.0 -
Again, if it's solely about self love then I'm very much for it, if for no other reason that it is through the love of ourselves that we seek to change what we can about ourselves that causes us pain or illness. My issue is that it seems to me that by denying the reality of the health risks it becomes an excuse not to change.
Yeah, I totally agree with you - I just really read your initial post wrong. It was clear, my comprehension just sucked.0 -
Just don't ask me to pay for "accepting" your lifestyle. By that I mean I don't want to be asked, through my taxes, to fund your healthcare because of your lifestyle.
That's not your choice to make. It's the balance struck in the bargain between a free society in the sense of individual rights and modern socialism that gives people some basic security. Many people's bad decisions are ultimately subsidized by others.0 -
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Many people's bad decisions are ultimately subsidized by others.
This is the most profound statement I have read on MFP!0
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