How do you feel about fat pride?

MrTolerable

Wow... this thread took a nasty turn real fast. The only question I have to ask is for those that are angry at people for not simply agreeing with you... Why are you here? What brought you to a Fitness related forum? Now, I mean no disrespect to anybody. I'm just lost as to how we could take responses that for the most part have been positive and basically turn this into 10 pages of "You suck, I hate you, shut your mouth?"

I don't know if you're talking about me or not, but I'll answer. I'm not disagreeing with anyone's right to have an opinion, but I am trying to show how harmful and hurtful those opinions can be. I'd never comment on a thin persons thinness or make fun of the clothes they wear or what they eat (all things that have been done to fat people in this thread).

As to why I'm here - for support on my journey to a healthier lifestyle. I will ALWAYS speak up against shaming of any sort though and while I realize that won't make me lots of friends, I'm okay with that.

It was just a general statement I wasn't pointing anyone out imparticular. I think it has gone negatively both ways and it's silly. As you stated we are all here to support and motivate one another not to judge, bully, or belittle. I would never down talk anyone especially having had my own crazy ups and downs with self worth, weight, self esteem, etc etc. I think this topic was doomed from the beginning unfortunately, but it didn't have to take such a nasty turn.

Am I the only one still bracing for this nasty turn you speak of?!
*fastens up seat-belt*

Cathalain

Wow... this thread took a nasty turn real fast. The only question I have to ask is for those that are angry at people for not simply agreeing with you... Why are you here? What brought you to a Fitness related forum? Now, I mean no disrespect to anybody. I'm just lost as to how we could take responses that for the most part have been positive and basically turn this into 10 pages of "You suck, I hate you, shut your mouth?"

I'll give this a go. Not sure if it was directed here, either.

I have no problem with anyone being what they WANT to be, whether it's fat or thin or toned or whatever. If someone claims that they're happy being X amount of pounds, good on them - rock on, brothers and sisters, you're awesome. My original post even said that I didn't consider it my business to be the weight police. :ohwell: I definitely don't agree with shaming people, either - hell, I was 343 pounds at 5'3" for Pete's sake, if anyone knows how it feels to be shamed, it would be me. But I won't say that "health at any size" is realistic, because it's not. There comes a point in time where you're just going to have health problems because of too much weight - when and how those problems manifest are, again, subjective and will vary from person to person.

I'm here because it's just one more tool in my arsenal to help keep me on point and reach my goals. That's it. What others do is not my concern - I like the social/forum aspect, sure, it's a nice feature, but it's not absolutely vital to my success. I'm here to make sure that my T2 won't get worse than it already is. I'm here to make sure I don't lose my vision or my feet. It can't get simpler than that, really.

I didn't think my response to this topic was negative, or even less than positive, but I guess that's subjective as well.

TL;DR? Short version:
Health at any size is not possible.
Shaming is wrong.
Mind your own business and we're good.
Love, peace and flowers.

Cathalain

We all have our own issues to deal with - perhaps it's just better that we deal with them instead of worrying about everyone else around us.

if people did this, they could not then claim that the words and/or actions of others "made" them overeat, "made" them depressed, "made" them hate themselves, etc. and we would have no use for reactionary identity "movements." sadly it would seem far easier and more popular to look outside rather than inside when we are unhappy with ourselves.

True enough. Thank you for this.

occupysmithmachine

Everyone should be able to take pride in themselves no matter what their outward appearance might be. In fact, I think that people who are overweight have to overcome self-hate to reach a healthier thought pattern to become a healthier weight. If it takes a movement to raise awareness of this right, I'm all for it.

MrTolerable

Everyone should be able to take pride in themselves no matter what their outward appearance might be. In fact, I think that people who are overweight have to overcome self-hate to reach a healthier thought pattern to become a healthier weight. If it takes a movement to raise awareness of this right, I'm all for it.

informative.

self-hate got me in a constant cycle with alcohol.. never thought about it regarding ppl with weight.

mank32

We all have our own issues to deal with - perhaps it's just better that we deal with them instead of worrying about everyone else around us.

if people did this, they could not then claim that the words and/or actions of others "made" them overeat, "made" them depressed, "made" them hate themselves, etc. and we would have no use for reactionary identity "movements." sadly it would seem far easier and more popular to look outside rather than inside when we are unhappy with ourselves.

True enough. Thank you for this.

:flowerforyou:

in another life, i was guilty of looking outside myself for the source of my unhappiness (e.g. having an invisible illness and physical disability while not looking the least bit sick can really bring out the Judgey McJerkersons). at some point i realized that MO wasn't getting me anywhere and a better use of my time and energy was to focus instead on improving my own thoughts and actions. i'm a lot happier now. :happy:

Fat2FitMyDrive

Ok... I guess what I'm getting at here is simple. Just because I don't feel that being "fat" should be celebrated doesn't make me hateful, mean, or a bully. In fact I'm the opposite of all those things. I have been there and hated myself in that skin. You may be more comfortable with yourself in said skin, but I'm not. So my opinion is just as valid as yours or anyone else's. If we start faulting people for differing opinions we mind as well start mass murdering people in the streets. There is no way on earth that you can be Obese and healthy. Now before you jump all over me and say I'm wrong hear me out. I was and others can be obese and healthy for a matter of time. Eventually it will deteriorate your health and if you don't believe that then I think your in for a rude awakening. I changed my life for me, for my 3 daughters, and for my wife because I wanted to be not only healthier and more active with them, but a better role model. It kills me to know that my daughters perception of me was Daddy with the big belly. Now, based on my own actions, my own decisions, my own hard work I have changed that perception and do believe that if I maintain this lifestyle my children will grow up happier and healthier people because of the knowledge and self worth I have enstilled in them. So, your here on MFP just to troll the forums and jump on anybody who's opinion differs from your own while you sit at home crying yourself to sleep at night because you are unhappy with you... I don't care if you are "Fat" "Skinny" "Purple" "Green" or "Orange" hate comes from all directions and nobody deserves it. So if we could apply the "If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all" rule to this forum I think that would benefit everybody!

Dr__Girlfriend

It's okay to love your body, and important to, regardless of what your goals are. It's good to strive for progress, and it's good to love yourself in the meantime

"I'll only love myself when I drop 10 pounds" is not a healthy attitude, because then you are never satisfied. Having healthy self-image is pushed farther and farther.

It's okay to be kind to yourself, while still striving to better yourself.

Edit: I am speaking from personal experience, because when I lost a lot of weight my self-image was worse than when I started. I nitpicked every little thing about myself. It's important to love yourself no matter what your goals are or where you stand with them.

DSTMT

In to read later!

_KitKat_

Obesity pride is like diabetes pride, or skin cancer pride, or anorexia pride, or alcoholism pride or crack addiction pride.

Severe medical problems aren't something to be celebrated...they are to be treated. Just because an obese person hasn't so far suffered a heart attack or whatever doesn't mean they get to consider themselves healthy with any measure of sanity.

This is not to say I support fat shaming or anything of the sort. But I tend to roll my eyes at someone, especially a role model, celebrating their unhealthiness as opposed to trying to do something about it.

^^^^^THIS^^^^^^

I am all for no bullying and larger people being confident in who they are. I have read on this movement before, some have even taken it far enough to argue, obese does not equal unhealthy and that doctors should not be allowed to tell type 2 diabetics they need to lose weight, because they believe there is no correlation. I do not think planes should make seats bigger, or movie theaters. When someone gets to a certain point in their size as to fall so outside of the majority it is nobodies responsibility to coddle or make accommodations for a self induced issue. They don't need needles on an extended plane ride because a junky may need a fix or they would get ill.

If someone is happy being a little thick, then fine and they can even not have health issues.....but obesity is a health epidemic and costs the health industry, the taxpayers and others and should not be promoted. Only in the extremely rare case is obesity not completely self induced, it may seem harsh and unfair and hurtful, but it is not reasonable to ask the majority to support and condone such a destructive behavior. The public should not ridicule, but many in this movement believe even educating is an insult and a conspiracy against them.

Obese children are where my anger comes into play, and a movement with some of the extreme views that are prevalent in this movement are nothing but harmful and irresponsible. If they take these views and project them onto a child they are being neglectful and abusive.


ETA : I do believe everyone should love themselves and be proud of accomplishments and always project their best face forward but celebrating a self induced condition is the same as alcoholic pride or meth head pride (gay pride & black pride are not even close to this. being black is not a self destructive behavior that was self induced and neither is being gay...comparing these to fat pride is insulting).....see makes no sense and the legality is irrelevant. Harmful behavior should not be celebrated. Plus saying morbidly obese people are not an outsiders concern and that people should mind their own business...shm....it is societies issue the same as if there are drug dealers in the neighborhood and I need to pay higher tax to hire more police. Why does my insurance cover gastric bypass? but does not have in patient treatment for drug addiction, this makes no sense to me.

helenarriaza

Ok... I guess what I'm getting at here is simple. Just because I don't feel that being "fat" should be celebrated doesn't make me hateful, mean, or a bully. In fact I'm the opposite of all those things. I have been there and hated myself in that skin. You may be more comfortable with yourself in said skin, but I'm not.

This.

RainRedfield

Obesity pride is like diabetes pride, or skin cancer pride, or anorexia pride, or alcoholism pride or crack addiction pride.

Severe medical problems aren't something to be celebrated...they are to be treated. Just because an obese person hasn't so far suffered a heart attack or whatever doesn't mean they get to consider themselves healthy with any measure of sanity.

This is not to say I support fat shaming or anything of the sort. But I tend to roll my eyes at someone, especially a role model, celebrating their unhealthiness as opposed to trying to do something about it.

Acceptance and Pride are two different things. Since this title and discussion is on FAT PRIDE I'm going to say that I certainly don't celebrate an unhealthy lifestyle, but there gets to be a point where the obese (even moderately) outnumber those who are fit (or at least those who are working on being fit). Personally I feel FAT PRIDE is a cop out.

Siriku

Appearance should not be the issue. There are variations in how people look, so there's no defining curvature, or muscle/fat ratio that can be defined as perfect. People can be overweight and healthy, and a large part of fat acceptance is image based; that is, combating the erroneous idea that everyone should be one ideal body type. That is the kind of fat pride that is totally awesome.

However, if somebodies weight is causing health problems, then being proud about that is something not to be celebrated but to be concerned about. Look at it this way, would you celebrate and encourage an anorexic person to continue down the path they're on? It would be dangerous to do so. It works both ways.

I do appreciate that there is a distinction in that society favours skinnier people in many ways, and that fat pride is a means to combat that, which is great. But it can be taken too far.

_KitKat_

This is from NAAFA.....

Size Discrimination Consequences are Real!

Creates medical and psychological effects

Results in wage disparity
Affects hiring and promotion
Affects academic options and advancement

Why Do People Partcipate in Size Discrimination? They Believe...

Stigma and shame motivate dieting and other attempts at weight loss
People fail to lose weight because of poor self-discipline and willpower

How Does Our Culture Allow Size Discrimination?

Sanctions overt expression of bias in social situations and through mass media
Says thinness is desirable & perpetuates societal messages that obesity = failure as a person
Places blame on the victim ignores contributing environmental factors

As for hiring, in the US many employers provide insurance, obesity raises rates. Many companies do not hire smokers...same thing. The assumption is also that an obese individual may not be as physically fit and the job may demand this....like an obese cop trying to chase the bad guy, nope I want a fit cop if i call for help.

People do fail at losing weight because of poor self-discipline and lack of willpower. Not saying there are not other issues but the truth is that is what it boils down to.

Thin is not always healthy, and someone obese is not a failure as a person but they are a failure at controlling their weight. Plus sorry to say it is the obese persons fault as well as outside forces. They are not a victim unless they suffer a debilitating metabolic disorder (extremely rare).

IcanIwill1

I knew I should not read this thread its filled with so much disgusting that I cannot even deal right now

also just want to point out that I am currently fat and considered perfectly healthy (aside from my chronic illnesses that I have no matter what my size or "health")

just because when you were fat you were miserable DOES NOT MEAN EVERY FAT PERSON IS MISERABLE YOU ARE NOT THEM YOU DO NOT KNOW THEM YOU WILL NEVER KNOW your experience does not equal someone elses. Just because you were not happy does not mean they cannot be perfectly happy as a 300 pound person. Just because you think they do not deserve to be happy and you think they need to change their body you think their body is not good DOES NOT MEAN THEY HAVE TO DO WHAT YOU THINK IS BEST DOES NOT MEAN THEY HAVE TO CHANGE (to fit what you see as okay to fit what you think is healthy to fit what you think is acceptable) HOLY SSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!T

people need to stop thinking their opinions of other peoples bodies and health actually matter . people need to stop projecting their own self hate on to other people and their own body expectations on to other people

just stop fat acceptance is extremely needed and anyone who says otherwise needs to shut up sit down and mind their own damn business

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
The more I read, the more I fumed, at some of the vain glorious, self righteous, BS some of them are mouthing.

Left4Good

Being fat isn't always the same as being unhealthy. Being thin isn't always healthy.

Fat pride seems to be about tying self esteem to something BESIDES your weight just as Black Pride isn't about black supremacy and Gay Pride isn't about an anti-straight agenda.

I think its healthy and, if anything, can be far more motivating when it comes to healthy behavior than fat shaming.

This!

Timshel_

People do fail at losing weight because of poor self-discipline and lack of willpower. Not saying there are not other issues but the truth is that is what it boils down to.

And finances...and work ethic...and general ethics in life.

People wanna celebrate being considered overweight, I don't care. Not my place to care, or judge them, or point a finger at look at them like they lack discipline and willpower. They want help or advice and ask me, then I can care and I will let them know what healthy means to me.

I certainly won't take any issues I had with being overweight, or any other issues, and project them on others.

Love_Is_My_Fuel

When I was fat I wasn't proud but didn't complain about my weight....Something magical started happening when I started working out and eating healthy I LOST WEIGHT!!!!!!!!I think if your fat, saying your healthy and demanding acceptance YOUR IN DENIAL!! Your not healthy because your fat! You don't know how good healthy feels so don't know the difference...I know the difference now being healthier and if I could bottle the feeling I would so fat people would change their opinions.

littlebutlean

fat pride is disgusting

it fosters obesity and poor health.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^

:drinker: :drinker: :drinker: