How can I pick up a cougar at the gym?

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  • MRSpivey
    MRSpivey Posts: 270 Member
    OP... when trying to pick up a predatory cat (puma, jaguar, whatever) you must do it very carefully. No sudden startling movements. Distract them with some raw meat containing a sedative. Allow time for the sedative to kick in before attempting to pick them up! Otherwise you might get mauled. Just kidding you... couldn't resist. :wink:
  • Tiki1978
    Tiki1978 Posts: 364
    Whaa?? No way. Cougar's are 35-40+ ...

    Yay! this made my day
  • Capt_Inzane
    Capt_Inzane Posts: 733 Member
    I didn't read any of the 16 pages but isn't his picture photoshopped?
    Hard for me to tell on my small screen at the moment but it looked shopped to me.

    Anyways, I've always heard just giving out pictures of your junk at the local gym is a good way to meet the ladies.

    Edit: Went back and read...lol at damn near everything.
  • ChasingMyBliss
    ChasingMyBliss Posts: 803 Member
    lmaooooo im dying reading this thread... <~~~~~~~~~~~`` cougar or puma? Honestly if you flatter an older woman and you tell her you find her intersting and still beautiful Im pretty sure you pull on that rope (cage drops) and u'll catch her

    this ^^^^
  • CardiC333
    CardiC333 Posts: 68 Member
    Um excuse me I consider myself a cougar
    when I hunt the 18-19 year olds.. I'm 21. ;) But have always dated older. Looool maybe that's only realistic in my world.
    Guess I'm still a cub. :( I aint no cougar!!!!! But I pretend. :D
  • ItsMeGee3
    ItsMeGee3 Posts: 13,254 Member
    Ohhh I see some wanna be cougars
  • JBfoodforlife
    JBfoodforlife Posts: 1,371 Member
    Is there some kind of fascination for women to be a cougar?.... Just curious... :)
  • Go_Mizzou99
    Go_Mizzou99 Posts: 2,628 Member
    First you need a horse, and a dog and a rope. Then you get a fancy traditional mexican outfit. The rest is downhill from there!

    bc30NL7.jpg

    I think the cougar (below) is more along the lines of what he is looking for....

    tumblr_inline_n6nqclh2cM1qbgtl7.gif
  • Lleldiranne
    Lleldiranne Posts: 5,516 Member
    Whaa?? No way. Cougar's are 35-40+ ...

    You've been legally old enough to drink for 4 years in the US? COUGAR ! That's dumb.

    Wait ... I'm cougar age? No way. Can't be. I'm still young? :sad:


    Please, tell me it's really 40+
  • Barbellarella_
    Barbellarella_ Posts: 454 Member
    Where's the OP? Did u get one yet?
  • arainiday1
    arainiday1 Posts: 1,763 Member
    i am so sad he never came back :cry:
  • DreamBigEatLarge
    DreamBigEatLarge Posts: 162 Member
    COME BACK OP......TELL US WHAT YOU'VE LEARNT!!!
  • TX_Thundercat
    TX_Thundercat Posts: 2,437 Member
    Put out a wounded goat. They can't resist!
  • runforestrun35
    runforestrun35 Posts: 480 Member
    Get on the treadmill next to her and do some manly stretches... Then just so she knows you are interested just keep asking her questions and talking to her the whole time she is running, if that doesn't work... Just keep matching her pace... She will just love it... I know I do! Lol
  • Sylvitryinghard
    Sylvitryinghard Posts: 549 Member
    lmaooooooooooooooo this makes me laugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    This is my favorite thread in the history of ever.
  • bunnypanther
    bunnypanther Posts: 110
    Firstly, am somewhat surprised that wild animals go to the gym....

    Secondly, I would not want someone hitting on me when I was working out.

    I have been accused of being a Cougar. Am happy to find I am a Puma. And I drive a Puma. And I'm also a Panther. A whole zoo of big cats, me!

    Reading this thread has been hilarious! I just REALLY want to know how it went!
  • Noogynoogs
    Noogynoogs Posts: 1,028 Member
    Go to grab a granny night
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  • Escloflowne
    Escloflowne Posts: 2,038 Member
    Just go in smelling of booze and cigarettes
  • carfanman
    carfanman Posts: 271 Member
    Puma
    A woman in her sexual prime between the ages of 30-39 who prefers to date younger men. The term "puma" does not apply to women before their 30s, and should never be confused with the titles "Cougar" (ages 40-49) and "Jaguar" (ages 50+).


    thanks Urban Dictionary!

    what is after age 50? I have an older friend who's mother dated a guy that was 30 years old when she was 81. They were together for 4 years...
  • LifterDave
    LifterDave Posts: 112 Member
    Whaa?? No way. Cougar's are 35-40+ ...

    You've been legally old enough to drink for 4 years in the US? COUGAR ! That's dumb.

    so i am 37 that makes me a cougar?!

    GROOOOSSSS

    I would never EVER date a man below 40 ;)
    37 would still be a young lady in my book. Certainly not a cougar yet.
  • piyuK
    piyuK Posts: 45 Member
    Just waiting to know how it went!!! lol lol lol
  • JTUSAFRet
    JTUSAFRet Posts: 28 Member
    Son, you are only 18. If you lack the know how and confidence to hook up with a cougar, leave it alone for a few years until you know what you are doing. You are likely just chasing a pipe dream that you are going to hook up with an older woman who is going to teach you all kinds of new tricks. That stuff you read in porn mags does not happen too often in real life.
    +1
  • dapunks
    dapunks Posts: 245 Member
    In for the update. Wonder if cougar has him tied up for later?
  • GBrady43068
    GBrady43068 Posts: 1,256 Member
    bend at the knees.
    Not bad.

    I was going to go with "Carefully, very carefully...while saying "Nice kitty....".
  • ItsMeGee3
    ItsMeGee3 Posts: 13,254 Member
    You're gonna need some skills!
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    BTW picking up any girls at the gym is what *kitten* do. There is a time and place. The gym is not.
  • ellechim1
    ellechim1 Posts: 74 Member

    what is after age 50? I have an older friend who's mother dated a guy that was 30 years old when she was 81. They were together for 4 years...

    Hubby says Turkey Vulture is after Cougar.....so 50+?
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