What's the worst thing someone has said to about being overw

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  • chrisallcock
    chrisallcock Posts: 173
    i had very not hurtful as such but annoying comments from sum of my idiot c0-works....as ive lost quite abit of weight they like to ask if i have cancer...nice huh
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
    Having a problem with my weight is pretty recent for me,but as a child I had a very bad speech problem so I was teased alot for that.I also loved to read so I was teased alot about that.I was called ugly by alot of people growing up.Im glad I was to,because since Jr high I no longer care what anyone says or thinks about me.So whatever comments random people may have made about my weight dont bother me at all.
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    the people I know are not like that(thank God...don't wanna have to cuss out relatives,lol),

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    i had very not hurtful as such but annoying comments from sum of my idiot c0-works....as ive lost quite abit of weight they like to ask if i have cancer...nice huh

    ummm your co-workers get the JERK award!!! That is terrible....uuuughhh!!!
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    My ex boyfriend: I was 20, size UK10 (i.e. not overweight at all, especially as I am 5'10"). He referred to me as his 'women'...when I pointed out that surely he meant to say 'woman', he laughed and said,

    "No, there's enough of you for two." :noway: :noway: :noway:

    Needless to say he rapidly discovered he was single! :laugh:

    ETA: I'll read the rest of the horror stories later.

    LOVE!!! this one:)) Glad you got rid of him:wink:
  • chrisallcock
    chrisallcock Posts: 173
    i had very not hurtful as such but annoying comments from sum of my idiot c0-works....as ive lost quite abit of weight they like to ask if i have cancer...nice huh

    ummm your co-workers get the JERK award!!! That is terrible....uuuughhh!!!


    jerk isnt the word i like to use ;p
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    oh where to start....
    My neighbor when I was in high school told me "sweetie, you would be so pretty if you lost weight (insert my awkward silence). oh, no, you're pretty now." not so smooth save there.
    tons of backhanded compliments from my grandmother...not all about my weight, some about my hair, clothes, etc.
    This boy at school who sat behind me in Algebra said "what are you going to do with those arms?" and proceeded to poke my arm fat. Another day he said sarcastically "look at those guns" I never thought about my arm fat before then, and after that I never wore short sleeve shirts again. I'm 25 and still so self conscious about my arms that I wear 3/4 or long sleeves only.
    People always telling me, even co-workers/bosses, that I have such a pretty face & nice, clear skin. I've always thought those were weird compliments, why not just say I'm pretty?
    When I was in the process of getting promoted at work and training my replacement, hearing my supervisor say "oh man now I'm gonna have to play watchdog and keep the guys from coming back here and flirting." referring to the new girls better looks.
    My husband asking me "whats wrong with your arms?" me "?" him "their weird"...aka the're fat
    The worst was my husband saying our sex life is lacking because of my weight. Then saying that he is embarrassed to be seen with me in public because he doesn't like being stereotyped as the black man with the fat white woman. Imagine my shock that after all this time of being together. It made me question everything about why we got together in the first place, since at the time he said this, I was the same size as when I met him!! I have to say though that him saying that did push me to work out more seriously. Not to loose weight for him, but I had a scary thought that if I got divorced I would be left with nothing but my weight. I decided that I wanted to get healthy for me and stop thinking about body image and do something to care for myself - to make myself happy!

    Glad you're doing this for YOU!! You deserve it!!!



    I am ready to pimp slap your husband for saying that to you.....grrrrrrrrrrr!!!!:explode:
  • healthyjen342
    healthyjen342 Posts: 1,435 Member
    I've been the fat kid pretty much all my life. I remember being called a fatty even back in elementary school. I was babysitting once a few years ago... I was about 220, 5'7" then so still fat but not like shockingly fat or anything... The 7 year old boy... (who was every bit of 90 pounds) kept punching my fat, and calling me fat - this was from a family that is very big on manners yet also kind of judgemental... I told someone about it a while later they said that little kids don't think it hurts you to punch fat... like a pillow or something... So I not only remember this, but had a couple bruises to show for it... never told the parents, but also never came back.

    A few months ago... and I'm sure she didn't mean anything by it, but just wasn't thinking, she told me how a boyfriend broke up with her "because she was too skinny" then proceeds to say "but you should see the girl he is with now, he makes YOU look tiny..." I'm in the 260's now, still 5'7" but I've been told I carry my weight really well... I wanted to say... yeah... compared to this person YOU would be considered attractive... I just held my tongue. the list goes on and on. Don't think people realize just how much what their off handed comments can stick with people.

    Oh man...I have heard that one before...One of my then-thinner sisters was describing a person and she said, and i quote "Jen, she was big like you..MAYBE even bigger"..I was like..what does that even mean..
  • healthyjen342
    healthyjen342 Posts: 1,435 Member
    I remember in the 5th grade at an after-school program, everyone was supposed to stand up and dance..One little guy said, "Yeah, all these girls are gonna be shaking their chicken butts"...Then he looked at me..and said, "Well not you...you dont have a chicken butt..."...my little 10yr old feelings were hurt.
  • lil_missfit
    lil_missfit Posts: 565 Member
    Hugs to all of you -- None of us deserved this kind of treatment.....people can be so cruel and heartless.

    I didn't even realize I was chubby till 3rd grade. Long story short -- my biological mother was killed in a car accident and I was placed in foster care. A year later I was adopted by a family. What followed was the worst 4 years of my life. She would call me Miss Piggy in front of everyone. She would lecture me till 2, 3, 4 am about how fat and disgusting I was. During these lectures she would make me hold gallon jugs from the freezer to demonstrate how much extra weight I carried around. She used to make me run around the block -- I say "make me"because she would follow me in her truck. She would "test" me -- asking me to bend at the waist till I touched the floor -- knees locked -- when I continued to "pass" -- she would have me stand on books lol. She enrolled me in track -- distance only explaining to the coach that I needed the extra exercise. when I got to join the swim team -- she told me in front of my team that she couldn't stand coming to our meets because I looked like a disgusting beached whale. She criticized what I ate all the time -- a lot of "do you really need that?"

    To this day -- the voice in my head that tries so hard to drag me down -- sounds like her.

    I was unadopted and went back to foster care. Part of my case plan had to do with eating and exercising -- and watching me around boys since it was known that overweight teenagers were promiscuous due to low self esteem. Here I thought we chased the boys for exercise lol. In one home -- I started out with "short stuff" as my nickname -- and as the weight gain continued -- I was called "overstuffed". i also had a foster sister that called me Mam-moo.

    In school, I was called every fat name you can imagine. A certain group of young males would sing "Fatty Fatty 2 by 4, can't fit in the classroom door" (Even though I could lol). When ever some one was mad at me - I was the fat b**** lol.

    After my divorce -- I was approached in a bar by a man wearing a T shirt that said "I f*** the fat friends". I did let him buy me a drink -- then left with friends lol.

    My daughter's father -- when I announced I was pregnant -- said to me "But you're so fat -- how can you tell??"

    A lady I work with -- she always tries to give me her left overs from lunch. And I want to believe she's just being nice -- but it reeks of "I know you're fat and all you want to do is eat -- so here's more food."

    I know what doesn't kill us makes us stronger right?? But some days I don't feel so strong -- and those are the days those memories play over and over. I just keep imagining myself on the Maury Povich show -- you know -- the one where we get to face our tormentors as total hotties. I really miss that show lol

    Your foster care and adoption story breaks my heart. I hate that this goes on in our child services system. You ARE going to be victorious with your weight loss efforts!!!

    I have days when I may start to replay past hurts and what I have started doing (when I can catch the thoughts in time) is saying to myself. "Keisha, you WILL win! Keisha, you ARE pretty! Keisha, you CAN do this!....etc." I reaffirm myself all the time....We HAVE to because a lot of us only have ourselves to push us forward when everyone else around us is pulling s down.

    Look forward to making those ppls mouths drop open:)) You're gonna do it!!! Thanks for sharing:heart:
  • Losing2Live69
    Losing2Live69 Posts: 743 Member
    My grandma, who is 85...and her mind is not all there at times...she told me, "now that you're losing weight you will be pretty again"! I told her, "Nana, I was pretty when I was at my biggest too." She didn't say anything. She made me feel like I was some ugly woman before I started losing weight. I forgive her though, she doesn't think right all the time.
  • nerdyandilikeit
    nerdyandilikeit Posts: 2,185 Member
    in high school i was a band geek and ate with my band friends at lunch. one day i said some smart *kitten* comment to tease one of my friends and he tickled my side to get me back. i had these pants that snap up the side on and they were kind of slick to the touch, so when i freaked out and tried to avoid the tickle, i slipped off my seat onto the floor. i was laughing SO hard until another boy from band (read: someone i definitely trusted and saw as my friend, even if we weren't best friends) said "Look! A beached whale!" his best friend (another of my 'band friends') laughed, but i held back tears and got up while my real friends told him to shut up.

    I had my next class with him, the guy who laughed and another of my close friends from band who was at lunch and we sat all together (me right behind the guy who made the comment). he was still talking and laughing about it and i got so mad that i stood up and slapped him across the back of the head as hard as i could! my teacher obviously was like wth? but when i told her what he did to make me slap him, she made HIM apologize to ME! needless to say it made me feel much better (as well as make me not even sort of like him in any way ever again)! :)
  • Triquetra
    Triquetra Posts: 270 Member
    MY MOTHER (who I now haven't spoken to in over 15 years!)

    When I was about 7 I was walking home from school in an outfit she dressed me in, bright red cordoroy pants and a bright red matching turtleneck shirt (early 80's fashion statement)...When I got up the street and came in she said "oh, it's you....I thought I saw a tomato rolling up the street". That combined with years and years of "you're fat", "I'm starting you on a diet", feeding everyone in the house a regular meal and then putting a salad in front of me, etc. I think that is why I am so large, I gave up VERY early not knowing any better.

    No I have her out of my life, my ex now gone, and have the self-confidence to go after the weight I want to be.
  • joybell32
    joybell32 Posts: 252 Member
    I got teased in school because I was fat, middle-class, but went to a preppy school, and wore glasses. My sophomore year of high school i had enough and hit a guy in the face. HARD. I realized I had it in me to control how people saw me. They might say yeah there's the fat guy, but they'll say there's the fat guy that you don't say $h!t to.

    Awesome! Good for you!
  • hayley_m
    hayley_m Posts: 61 Member
    On a rare visit to my aunties, hadnt seen her for about 4 years and it was a year after my 2nd child she turned and said to me " oh you've definitly got the Ellis gene...big hips and fat bum" i wasnt even at my heaviest then!! to be fair it is true i do have the big hips fat bum gene but i dont need to hear it!!

    Before i met my husband i was mid weight loss after my first child, i was told by a friends boyfriend " i bet you're a go-er in bed, heavier red heads are supposed to be rampant!" i asked if that was a rule in a book i obviously hadnt read he said " well you know the fact you have red hair and extra weight means you have something to prove" i was quite gobsmacked!

    on a shopping trip with my mum i found a long jumper dress that i liked, it was a 16 and she said " are you sure you dont need a bigger size? theres a 20 here" i could've slapped her!!

    Alot of people ask me this one and im not sure how to take it but i find it funny anyway ... i make novelty cakes, birthdays, christenings, weddings etc.... i also get asked " i bet you eat loads of cake dont you, do you have to make extra?" now to be fair this could just be a statement that ANY size person gets asked but when you're overweight it feels like they are saying " no wonder you're fat if you work with cakes!" in fact other than chocolate fudge cake i dont particularly like cake!!
  • CarliBez
    CarliBez Posts: 19
    Bump :)
  • beckey24
    beckey24 Posts: 170 Member
    The most hurtful thing actually came from my sister...and I have actually wrote her off because of it. I already have a Bachelors and Masters degrees and have decided that I want to return to school for another bachelors so I can get a job in a field where my strengths lie(Accounting). She told me that it didn't matter how many degrees I have, nobody wants to higher a morbidly obese person cause it just sends the wrong image.
  • vitacat
    vitacat Posts: 81 Member
    My mother told me you used to be slim, tall and slim... well I'm still tall!
  • dmkaiser83
    dmkaiser83 Posts: 89
    My mother used to call me miss piggy. one thanksgiving, i was about 14, she slapped my hand during dinner and said "you keep eating like that and you're going to DIE." I was horrified and spent the rest of the day in tears. my brother used to call me chunky butt, thunder thighs, fatty, tubby, and sing 'tubby, tubby, 2X4 can't get through the kitchen door'.
    when i was 17 I quit eating. I literally ate once a day and ran 2-4 miles a day. i dropped 20 pounds in less than a month and my parents accused me of being on drugs. when i told them i wasn't on drugs, i was just tired of hearing how fat i was, all they said was 'oh.' I have struggled with my weight since i was 13. when i first started turbofire a month ago, my mother actually asked me 'will this workout make your calves smaller?' I do have fairly large calves, but really? it never stops. my brothers still make fun of me for being overweight.
  • irridia
    irridia Posts: 527 Member
    I have inadvertently said bad things to my daughter. I pretty much have a permanent conception in my head that she is smaller than me. I also hadn't realized that she had recently started working out and watching diet, so when she told me her weight, because of the way she framed how she said it, I thought she was upset about it and said : "I'm sorry" boy did I feel like an A**hat. I did tell her that I thought she was complaining and I had thought that she weighd less than me. I hpe I haven't done damage, I've tried to be careful about what I say and not make food an issue with any of the kids. She's very beautiful and I tell her often, not sure if she believes me and I don't ever say that she needs to improve anything other than her health. She has asthma and since I have developed diabetes, I worry about her.

    I was a skinny little kid, at puberty my hips carried all of my weight but I had a flat belly once i hit jr high. This was the 70's hips were not in. We were supposed to look like little boys. All during that time, pre-pubecent through young adult hood, my dad called me fata**, lardbutt, lead butt, lazy fat a** etc. All this time w/complete flat belly 5'4'' 36-22-36, I actually did the stupid fasting crap where all you did was mix in liquid protien w/ice tea. I had horrible headaches and probably completely set myself up for weight gain that I expericned later. It started at 17 w/not working as hard in marching band and not swimming in the summer so I could go to my boyfriend's pool instead... but of course there was more making out giong on than swimming. Once after my daughter was born and still little, I was at the laundry matt and a couple of teenage girls said when my daughter was crying "I'd cry too if my mom looked like that!" I was soo pissed.

    I LOVE to dance. My boyfriend was driving out to a place to dance and wouldn't even think of taking me because "people would laugh at me" Same guy has also said to me on several occasions that I should get lipo or the lap band, but wouldn't help me with the kids, or change diet so that I could eat healthy and feed the family healthy at the same time. Now that he has figured out that he needed to lose weight too, things have gotten better but the old stuff hurts sometimes still. I just try not to let the self-loathing take hold and keep pushing. Wish my daughter was in the house so we could help her too. Her roomie is the unhealthy eater in her house. We are all learning our way and when people say things trying to offer help/support, I let it slide. On purpose mean things though... that has to stop.
  • light_shimmer
    light_shimmer Posts: 118 Member
    While having a break up argument with my ex, he was listing all the reasons he didn't want to see me anymore. Finished by pinching my cheeks and saying he's never been into big girls ( We started dating at one on my "thin" periods, and I had gained maybe 20 lbs while we were together). I can't stand to have people touch my cheeks to this day.

    I waitressed at a resort when I was at a healthy weight. I have a bigger frame, so supermodel thin is not my style. Anyway. I went up to a table of four men, asked, Hi what can I get you today? The reply? You can tell us when the cute girls come on shift. I walked away and they complained to my boss that they weren't being served. i told my boss what they had said and they were asked to leave! Miss working there.

    My mom asking me last year if I was pregnant....and then asking 20 minutes later, are you SURE?

    Oh, bunches more. How depressing. 30DS day 3, here I come lol.

    * Forgot one- In middle school, I wanted to play basketball with the girl who was my "best friend" at the time. She laughed at me and said chubby girls with glasses can't play sports.
  • tiffanymariebrock
    tiffanymariebrock Posts: 47
    today i lost my 10lb goal before my vacation and two little boys called me fat and their mother did nothing about it. so not cool!
  • 01bigmomma02
    01bigmomma02 Posts: 10
    Well there is so many ... I really didn't become morbidly obese until I was around 20 ... I am now 34 so 14 years I have been living with this!! I remember about 1 1/2 years ago I was at Superstore with my children unloading my groceries. An Elderly woman was walking towards me going to shop... as she got closer I noticed her staring ... i didn't really pay attention... but I felt eyes burning on me lol... so I looked at her again... and she was so disgusted with me.. that she crossed the street JUST before she reached me... made a uuggghh sound... I said "Hello" to ease the tension...!! She looked at me and said "you are SO fat, thats gross" ... that just threw me ... I was not only disgusted how SHE behaved (I mean an elderly woman) but to actually have someone say that in front of my children WHO by the way heard everything. I put up my wall and looked at her and said... Yes, yes I am fat and you are a rude , ignorant human being!! Then I turned to my kids and told them... no matter what people look like, what color they ect ... they are to never , EVER say anything disrespectful to others like that lady done to me...!!
  • ixabelita
    ixabelita Posts: 2
    Hi all,

    I really think that my live it's about weight, losing weight, food...
    grrrrrr there must be something more in life... I wish I could enjoy myself, the way I look, and just feel gorgeous no matter what...

    But no...

    Tomorrow? The same as today, the usual everyday!

    xxx
  • 01bigmomma02
    01bigmomma02 Posts: 10
    I rememebr not too long ago my mom said... " You would be so pretty if your were skinnier" ... I Love you too mom, and she wonders why I have a complex...!! As much as I say it doesn't bother me it does ....!!!
  • SMarie10
    SMarie10 Posts: 956 Member
    My Mother (although I love her dearly) would always tell me I had a skinny girl hiding inside of me. She's still trying to get out :wink:
  • ladydove5
    ladydove5 Posts: 23 Member
    When I was a teenager I weighed 98 pounds soak and wet with clothes and shoes on. I was walking with a friend one day and thought I was looking pretty good. There were a couple of guys walking behind us and I heard one of them say to the other , " I bet she can sing like a bird......she's got the legs of one". I was terribly embarrassed:blushing: Insensitive remarks can come in many forms...from some very insensitive people. I laugh about it now ....but not then.
  • mlagena
    mlagena Posts: 154 Member
    I don't remember being teased much about my weight just general teasing, i guess. Maybe I blocked it out? I blocked out a lot of school. lol Oddly enough I do remember getting teased about the size of my head. :huh: Kinda like Dib from Invader Zim! :laugh:
    I always looked at myself with the mentality, "I'm bigger than my friends, so I have to take care of them." I've also always been taller than my friends. I used my size as intimidation and would, literally, throw it around with my friend who was also big. (We would sort of sumo during recess. lol)

    The most weight teasing I got was from my brother and sister. I would always say, "I wanna do [this] when i grow up!" and my sister would tell me, "You're too fat to do that, you should be an opera singer. They get to be fat." or there was the "You should be a policeman because everyone gives them donuts." Wow, thanks. I was so naive, though. I remember when I was about SIX my brother said to me, "Megan, I'm looking to gain some weight. Tell me what you do." I'm glad I was so little and that it didn't bother me at the time. I doubt either of them remember those comments, but I do! I just recently started telling my mom about it and she's was so mad. lol

    One thing that hurt THE most, and I know he wasn't thinking it when he said it (he's pretty sweet, but DUMB), is when an exboyfriend actually said to me, "You look better with your clothes on." :noway: :embarassed:
    Hope that wasn't TMI! lol :sick:
  • carmenvo
    carmenvo Posts: 34
    When I was nine or ten we went swimming with some other class from our school. When we were waiting for our teacher to come out of the dressing room so we could enter the pool, one of the girls of the other class (I think the same age or maybe one year younger) right next to me started to conjugate 'to be too fat', looking me in the eyes. I was too chicken to answer.
  • Forensic
    Forensic Posts: 468 Member
    I don't remember being teased about my weight to my face during school, though this likely has quite a bit to do with the fact that I distinctly recall socking a boy in the teeth for trying to pick on me in elementary. I never got in trouble for it (I suppose he didn't want to admit he'd been hit by a girl), but most people figured me for a little bit nutters. I was left alone and ignored, but for the snickers and such when I couldn't clear the bar, climb the rope, run the mile, etc in phy ed. I was actually told by a girl I'd gone to classes with since pre-school in 8th grade - when we'd been paired together by the teacher - that she had been told/figured I was a b**** and so no one talked to me. Amazing how a reputation can continue even when people have no idea what it's for.

    In general, though, I KNEW I was fat, I have been since I was a toddler, and built up walls and an aura that drives people away. It keeps away snarky comments... and friends. Most of my friends came to me and most were big, like me, so I felt more comfortable around them.

    I've worked through most of the unapproachability, now to work through the weight. :)
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