Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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My confession: I live vicariously through the people in this forum, because I have no physical friends. It's like watching the group of cool kids in the playground back when I was at school.
I understand this one too.
I have like two friends and then my family. That was why I was so afraid to join in here. I never feel like I fit in anywhere.
Thankfully everyone here has been really nice.
This is me, too. Ever since I can remember, kids never liked me in school. I was so incredibly shy and had so much anxiety, they all just thought I was a weirdo. Well, I never outgrew it. Even as an adult I feel like the weird kid standing on the sidelines watching the cool kids.
I moved to Las Vegas a couple years ago and never made any "real" friends, other than one former coworker I hang out with a few times a year. All of my family & two good friends from high school live back home (Chicago suburbs). Luckily I have an awesome boyfriend who is kind of opposite as me, yet seems to completely understand me.
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tincanonastring wrote: »littled1986 wrote: »Now it's quiet here and I'm kind of embarrassed by my last post.
Don't be. You're amongst friends, even if we're not all here at the moment. I think we all have a secret motivation, even if it's just a little thing.
Yep, we all have our secret motivators. Part of mine is refusing to let my ex (that I mentioned in a previous post) have the satisfaction of saying I gained weight after we broke up. I did gain some weight, but it was due to other reasons.
I want strong bones and cool muscles and all that healthy stuff... but I'm also strongly motivated to become the "hot" chick my SO says (daily, repeatedly, sincerely) he sees in me. Because I sure as hell don't see her when I look in the mirror.0 -
... double post, MFP blip...
Phew. It's not just me, lol.My confession: I live vicariously through the people in this forum, because I have no physical friends. It's like watching the group of cool kids in the playground back when I was at school.
I don't really have friends either. There's another mom I get along pretty well with but we only see each other on the rare days she picks up her kids... but I've been so disappointed by friendships in the past, I don't actually care. Well, except when people talk about going out with their friends and post all the pictures and it makes me feel very lonely. But I haven't had a close friend since my first marriage 15 years ago.
This is me too. I lost my best friend when I finally grew a set and told her how I really felt about her dick of a redneck douche husband (we were friends since elementary). The others just fell by the wayside and we grew apart or I just didn't want put up with their antics. My best friend is my husband and we do everything together.
Confession 1: I have spent the past three evenings trying to catch up on the thread... when I left off three days ago I was on page 178.
Confession 2: I don't understand how some people have so much time to spend on these forums. I can barely keep up with this thread. I haven't left this thread in three days.
Confession 3: I hate smokers. I don't understand why anyone would even try it because everyone knows how bad it is for you. I also hate getting in an elevator with someone who is coming back from a smoke break. I silently shame smokers in my head.
Confession 4: I get excited when I am the first one to use a public toilet that was just cleaned (because the toilet seat is up)
That is all for now.0 -
I celebrated a short term weight loss goal last Saturday with pizza and beer. It took me four freakin days to get back to the afore mentioned goal. It's gonna be awhile till we do that again.0
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My mom took the kids for the week to the beach and I ate every marshmallow out of their box of Lucky Charms.0
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JulieAnneFIU wrote: »My mom took the kids for the week to the beach and I ate every marshmallow out of their box of Lucky Charms.
Lucky Charms Marshmallows are a superfood, the equivalent to Kale on Crack.0 -
... double post, MFP blip...
Phew. It's not just me, lol.My confession: I live vicariously through the people in this forum, because I have no physical friends. It's like watching the group of cool kids in the playground back when I was at school.
I don't really have friends either. There's another mom I get along pretty well with but we only see each other on the rare days she picks up her kids... but I've been so disappointed by friendships in the past, I don't actually care. Well, except when people talk about going out with their friends and post all the pictures and it makes me feel very lonely. But I haven't had a close friend since my first marriage 15 years ago.
I seriously feel like you're my sister from another mister. I, too, am a stay at home mom that looks forward to Monday's and doesn't have any real friends to go out with. I used to but I seemed to have lost them along the way. Almost everything you post I relate to.0 -
JulieAnneFIU wrote: »... double post, MFP blip...
Phew. It's not just me, lol.My confession: I live vicariously through the people in this forum, because I have no physical friends. It's like watching the group of cool kids in the playground back when I was at school.
I don't really have friends either. There's another mom I get along pretty well with but we only see each other on the rare days she picks up her kids... but I've been so disappointed by friendships in the past, I don't actually care. Well, except when people talk about going out with their friends and post all the pictures and it makes me feel very lonely. But I haven't had a close friend since my first marriage 15 years ago.
I seriously feel like you're my sister from another mister. I, too, am a stay at home mom that looks forward to Monday's and doesn't have any real friends to go out with. I used to but I seemed to have lost them along the way. Almost everything you post I relate to.
I feel this way about @ShibaEars. I relate to everything she posts!0 -
AgentOrangeJuice wrote: »JulieAnneFIU wrote: »My mom took the kids for the week to the beach and I ate every marshmallow out of their box of Lucky Charms.
Lucky Charms Marshmallows are a superfood, the equivalent to Kale on Crack.
But, do you get "Monstrous Gainz" from Lucky Charms?0 -
tincanonastring wrote: »littled1986 wrote: »Now it's quiet here and I'm kind of embarrassed by my last post.
Don't be. You're amongst friends, even if we're not all here at the moment. I think we all have a secret motivation, even if it's just a little thing.
Yep, we all have our secret motivators. Part of mine is refusing to let my ex (that I mentioned in a previous post) have the satisfaction of saying I gained weight after we broke up. I did gain some weight, but it was due to other reasons.
I want strong bones and cool muscles and all that healthy stuff... but I'm also strongly motivated to become the "hot" chick my SO says (daily, repeatedly, sincerely) he sees in me. Because I sure as hell don't see her when I look in the mirror.
That's one of my major motivating factors too.
I'd like to lose some more weight too (vanity) but I really just want to be as strong as I was when I used to be physically active.
Confession: I hate counting calories, not the process but the reality of food deprivation over a long time. I've been having the hardest time keeping to my goal lately. I've been eating at a deficit since January and I'm getting a bit fed up. I'm not sure if I should reduce weight to .5lbs per week so I have more energy to work and more calories play with. Lately I find that I have been over exercising to make a deficit instead of just eating less.0 -
tincanonastring wrote: »littled1986 wrote: »Now it's quiet here and I'm kind of embarrassed by my last post.
Don't be. You're amongst friends, even if we're not all here at the moment. I think we all have a secret motivation, even if it's just a little thing.
Yep, we all have our secret motivators. Part of mine is refusing to let my ex (that I mentioned in a previous post) have the satisfaction of saying I gained weight after we broke up. I did gain some weight, but it was due to other reasons.
My ex (we never married) would say that he didn't want to get married because once a woman ate the cake, she would let herself go. After six years I ended up leaving him for my boss (whom a married a year later). Sure enough I put on 40lbs in two years. Now, I would just love to run into him to show him that even though I did put on the weight I was able to lose ((most of it) and am still better off without him.
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smashley_mashley wrote: »tincanonastring wrote: »littled1986 wrote: »Now it's quiet here and I'm kind of embarrassed by my last post.
Don't be. You're amongst friends, even if we're not all here at the moment. I think we all have a secret motivation, even if it's just a little thing.
Yep, we all have our secret motivators. Part of mine is refusing to let my ex (that I mentioned in a previous post) have the satisfaction of saying I gained weight after we broke up. I did gain some weight, but it was due to other reasons.
My ex (we never married) would say that he didn't want to get married because once a woman ate the cake, she would let herself go. After six years I ended up leaving him for my boss (whom a married a year later). Sure enough I put on 40lbs in two years. Now, I would just love to run into him to show him that even though I did put on the weight I was able to lose ((most of it) and am still better off without him.
Ooh he sounds like a jerk. I'm glad you left him. That statement would be a deal breaker for me. (I don't put up with much at all /maybe that's why I'm alone! Lol)0 -
AgentOrangeJuice wrote: »In my IRL, I have absolutely no one that shares my interests.
I haven't played Dungeons and Dragons in 10 years.
No one to argue about who the greatest Green Lantern is.
No one to geek out about the latest Marvel Legends Figures, I GOT THE NEW IRONFIST
FIGURE IT'S FREAKING AWESOME.
I'm the Chubby guy in karate so I'm kinda like a pariah, I do the motions but my side kick and round houses aren't even remotely good or high, so I'm not into Tournaments and you know, if you're not bringing in Trophies for the Dojo.. . . . Oh but Matt, Sensei says "Good Job Matt at least 5-6 times an hour.
No one to talk to about the New Star Wars, because you know, people are concerned that the crossguard lightsaber the new Villain is wielding in the first teaser would chop his own hands off if he started twirling it around, but my point is, that dude isn't trying to twirl anything, he's just going to over head chop everything like Darth Vader did, he's a Vader Worshipping Acolyte, that's my opinion on that. BTW, I think Luke is the mastermind Dark Lord that doesn't appear until the end of the first movie. In the original script for Star Wars, after Vader dies on the Death Star, Luke picks up his helmet and puts it on and says "I'm Vader now!" but, they changed the script for marketability.
This is why I'm thankful for facebook. I have a few friends here, but we live in the middle of BFE, and I work from home, so I'm not out and about much. They are definitely not geekish people. All my friends from back home are scattered across 3 continents these days, but we have a private fb group where we constantly stay in touch and can rant about games and movies.tincanonastring wrote: »littled1986 wrote: »Now it's quiet here and I'm kind of embarrassed by my last post.
Don't be. You're amongst friends, even if we're not all here at the moment. I think we all have a secret motivation, even if it's just a little thing.
Yep, we all have our secret motivators. Part of mine is refusing to let my ex (that I mentioned in a previous post) have the satisfaction of saying I gained weight after we broke up. I did gain some weight, but it was due to other reasons.
I want strong bones and cool muscles and all that healthy stuff... but I'm also strongly motivated to become the "hot" chick my SO says (daily, repeatedly, sincerely) he sees in me. Because I sure as hell don't see her when I look in the mirror.
It irritates me that my husband says he doesn't care how I look. I know he means it sincerely and in a good way - he's been with me through my lowest and my highest weights (that's a 300lb span), and never changed the way he behaved or talked to me anywhere along the way. It's not like I could complain about it, because if he's saying things because I told him to, they don't really mean anything. I would just like to hear a spontaneous, "wow you look better," or something once in a while.
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My sister and I are 7.5 years apart (I am older). We have nothing in common and I seriously think one of us was adopted. We barely talk and have nothing in common. I wish my sister was my friend.0
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littled1986 wrote: »smashley_mashley wrote: »tincanonastring wrote: »littled1986 wrote: »Now it's quiet here and I'm kind of embarrassed by my last post.
Don't be. You're amongst friends, even if we're not all here at the moment. I think we all have a secret motivation, even if it's just a little thing.
Yep, we all have our secret motivators. Part of mine is refusing to let my ex (that I mentioned in a previous post) have the satisfaction of saying I gained weight after we broke up. I did gain some weight, but it was due to other reasons.
My ex (we never married) would say that he didn't want to get married because once a woman ate the cake, she would let herself go. After six years I ended up leaving him for my boss (whom a married a year later). Sure enough I put on 40lbs in two years. Now, I would just love to run into him to show him that even though I did put on the weight I was able to lose ((most of it) and am still better off without him.
Ooh he sounds like a jerk. I'm glad you left him. That statement would be a deal breaker for me. (I don't put up with much at all /maybe that's why I'm alone! Lol)
The best part was that, not only did I leave him for my boss... I was engaged to my boss two months later. We've been married for over five years.
Confession: I just realized I don't have any recent photos of me. The one in my pic is from San Fran in 2012. I think I will change it to my cat.
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ddrhellbunny wrote: »I feel the same way. I had to move twice within a year because of my boyfriends job, so while I can make friends easily, I don't really consider them friends. More like, people to talk to while I am at work. Although I did get close to one girl and her husband while living in El Paso. We just clicked because we were from the same state.
Now I live in another part of Texas and just started a job at an upscale restaurant. Everyone there is nice but not the sort I would probably hang out with outside of work. One girl seems to be on the same wave length, but as I've gotten older keeping friends is much more difficult now.
I am a true introvert. I like being alone or with that one person (my boyfriend) to be in my bubble. I have to be extroverted for my job since I am a waitress and the years of doing that has allowed me to transition very easily while I am there, but I catch myself sometimes.
It gets really lonely sometimes when I am home alone and my boyfriend is gone for days at a time for his job and I just sit there like, welp, what's on the internet today. I try to go do exploring when I can because something about taking a random trip somewhere and discovering stuff on your own is fun, but I do miss have that one other person you can connect with in that sense.
I miss my best friend from home, he was that one person ;_; my gay boyfriend hahahaha
This is so true for me too! I was a bartender for ten years in the same town...not a small town, but would know everyone when I went out but never felt like I had any REAL friends!0 -
ladybuggnorris wrote: »
I'm really impressed by your honesty. I hope you're feeling better about yourself these days. I'm with you about not really understanding much about mental illness when you've always been fine yourself. My 19 year-old daughter has recently been diagnosed with depression, and I'm still struggling with the idea that it may NOT have been caused by her low iron levels, but may actually be a serious condition.fellowtraveler87 wrote: »confession:
(and this ties in to the past 2 or 3 topics in this thread somehow)
I used to be pretty judgmental of people with mental health issues. I'd dismiss it as weakness or attention seeking. Then about 2 years ago I started having panic attacks and anxiety. Fought it for a long time, tried to "fix" it on my own, nothing worked. Finally got help. Very humbling experience to say the least.
Was also drinking quite heavily during this time. Knocking on the door of full-blown alcoholism. I think the anxiety and panic attacks were correlated to the drinking but I'm not which came first. Anyway after getting help the desire to drink really dropped off. Every once in a while I want to have a casual drink like everyone else but I don't trust myself. It might be fine, or I might spiral out of control and right now I'm not willing to take that risk. Drinking heavily, at least for me, was symptomatic of deeper issues I had been harboring.
It all stems back to childhood I really believe that now. I didn't have that bad of childhood but for one aspect and it had a drastic effect on me without my realizing it until recently. I'll confess more on that later don't have the time now...
Oh, and I used to be one of those who thought about sex constantly but after seeking help they put me on an anti-depressant (one more thing I used to not "believe in" doing until it effected me). It has really helped me a lot, but one side effect is it has pretty much killed my libido. I don't necessarily mind it and in fact find it strangely liberating. I can focus my thoughts on more productive things and feel more in control of my mind and body.
Not a confession, but I highly recommend the book "Always the fat kid" - felt like I was reading my own biography and it really helped me understand myself.
I am so happy you got help! Through being overweight my whole life and bullied, I was still ALWAYS very mentally stable. (Arrogance runs in my family!) After I had my second child, I became a completely different person. I was angry ALL THE TIME. I treated my three year old son sooo bad. One day, when the baby was about 6 months old, I raged out on my 3yo to the point that I physically hurt him. I immediately lock myself in the bathroom and called my husband to come home from work. That very day, we went to our GP, who diagnosed me with severe post-partum depression, even though I was not sad, but angry. I took antidepressants and joined a post-partum support group and the change back to my old self was almost immediate. To this day, I still harbor so much guilt over hurting my son and I will NEVER forget the look in his eyes when it happened. It was a complete look of betrayal. I don't think he remembers it and I have never told anyone this story before. I am so glad this is a no judgement zone, because now that I have brought the memories back up, I feel about the worst human being ever.
When our third was born, I also had PPD, but we knew to watch for the signs and made sure to get on anti-depressants right away...my awesome husband also insisted that I get out at least once a week, for a couple of hours without the baby.
I'm glad you feel safe sharing this here my mom had PPD after I was born, but my family just kind of swept it under the rug. My older sister remembers it, but she was older than your son was. I always thought I'd have it, but strangely, my depression has lifted a lot since I had my son. 0 -
tincanonastring wrote: »My last two confessions have been deep and feelful. Here's some small ones to lighten the mood!
Confession: I have Siri set to call me, "Oh, Great Bearded One." When she responds, "What do you need me to do, Oh Great Bearded One?" I lol. Every time.
Confession: Earlier this week, I worked from home an extra day and blamed it on Thing 1 not feeling good and needing to be around in case he had to be picked up from daycare. Today at noon, daycare called and told me to come pick up Thing 2 because she wasn't feeling well.
Confession: My wife is, um, top heavy. I have various boob-related nicknames for her, and by various I mean at least more than 10. For a while, her name in my phone was Lady Popems McBoobsalot.
Seriously LOL at this one!0 -
Will_Run_for_Food wrote: »I was craving something sweet the other night but had absolutely nothing in the house that would satisfy me except some hot chocolate. So I ate two spoonfuls of the powder. Two spoonfuls. Of the powder.
i too have done this! whew...not alone. ive even sprinkled some brown sugar in my mouth just to have something sweet.0
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