Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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pofoster21 wrote: »Ok folks! I wasn't going to look at this thread again until tonight but I had to jump on to share my excitement. After months of getting close and then jumping up I am officially at goal weight today! Actually .4 below. 210+ days later and 31 lbs. Yay!!!!!
Congrats!!!
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Since we just talked about Degrassi the other day I thought I'd mention I just read that after 14 years Degrassi: The Next Generation is ending this summer!0
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I'm starting to get a little concerned over here, AF is as of now 3 days late. Ugh! (May or may not be a little TMI)0
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pofoster21 wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »smashley_mashley wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »qn4bx9pzg8aifd wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »Susieq_1994 wrote: »Confession: Honestly, I'm not happy with the thread being stickied. We'll very likely get an influx of sarcastic, unkind, or snarky people ruining our nice thread mojo. *sniffle*
Call me jaded, but that was my first thought too.mantium999 wrote: »
Ok, serious answer, after thinking about it a little. Honestly, I believe this thread alone has kept a bunch of us here on MFP - people who may have wandered off, lost their motivation, felt intimidated to ask questions, or unsupported elsewhere. If one person improves their health and wellness by being part of this thread, then, yes, it warrants sticky status.mantium999 wrote: »What value does this thread bring to General Diet and Weight Loss Help that warrants a sticky status? If page count is a factor, there are plenty of "who wants to see who naked" discussions in Chit Chat that are probably more worthy than this.
I have no problem with the existence of this thread. I just stand by the belief that suggested reading (ie, stickies), should be educational and pertain to the topic of the forum. As far as fun items to give people a reason to return to the site, that's what Chit Chat is for. But that's just me, don't let me rain on your parade. Obviously this thread is popular, just not informative.
"Informative" is a matter of opinion. I, for one, feel VERY "informed" when Pancake announces that he has to pee or we get health updates on various pets.
I now know 100% more about the Muslim religion than I knew a week ago. And this is a good thing.
I've learned a bunch of terms for unusual phobias.
I know how many more exotic varieties of Pop Tarts and peanut butter and breakfast cereal exist in countries other than Canada.
Knowledge is good.
Sure, informative is a matter of opinion. And I also agree that knowledge is good, I seek out lots of it! I simply fail to see the value of directing members, often times who are new, who are seeking information and knowledge about General Diet and Weight Loss (the purpose of this particular sub-forum) to this particular thread. And thank you for making my point with examples of non-diet/weight loss things your learned from this thread.
It was tongue in cheek, as I'm sure you realized. Although I do think Pop Tarts and peanut butter and cereal fall into the diet category.
There have been hundreds of diet/fitness/weight loss questions and tips posted throughout this thread, you just have to wade through 783 pages to find them. Several of us have learned a rather effective upper body workout right here.
A few effective tips, among 783 pages, warranting a status of a helpful thread. Got it.
For the sake of ceasing to derail the purpose of THIS particular thread. I confess to having 3 IPAs last night, BEFORE hitting the weights.
Well, hello, Snarkmeister...
Listen, we aren't suddenly convening before some sort of MFP Supreme Court (and you aren't some sort of Chief Judge (though you do appear to be embracing a role akin to that of a Prosecuting Attorney)), and we don't suddenly need to justify the actions of someone (let alone, someone who has nothing to do with this thread!) doing something we never requested in the first place (and, frankly, involves a reality some of us don't *want*) -- and so we shouldn't be expected to have you or anyone else 'set up kleig lights', and expect us to 'subject ourselves to interrogation' (as though you were some sort of self-appointed attorney, judge, and jury... or some such entity hellbent on seeing a perceived form of 'justice' done)...
If you don't want to participate in the thread, then please, by all means, move on...! -- that is, unless you need to rant about something (other than 'this', or 'us', that is), in which case you are welcome to rant away...!
The world has enough people p*ssing on others -- there's no need to add to *that* 'status quo' (which, not-so-ironically, is part of what this thread is about -- assisting, being helpful, not judging, etc.)...
(...and yeah, my not sprinkling your sudden sarcasm-laced insults with 'rose petals' is not exactly representative of 'this thread'... however, it is a rare thing for rudeness to 'swoop in' on this thread... and I can't stand behavior that reminds me of my favorite bumper sticker -- Mean People Suck...)
Hi there aggressive one! I have no desire to see this thread removed, pretty sure I made that clear. But I stand by what I believe to be a valid point regarding MFP choosing this as a helpful thread within the context of the sub forum in which it exists. Not attacking the participants of this thread, not the purpose of this thread, simply stating that it's purpose isn't necessarily on point with the purpose of why a thread should be a sticky. Sorry you have such a personal attachment and felt offended as a result, but I prefer logic over emotion.
she's not agressive, she's being honest.
if you're struggling so much with the purpose of this thread, and can't see how it might help newbies who are normally ripped apart for the most simplest of questions elsewhere, that's on you, not us.
There's no struggle, the purpose of this thread is not currently related to General Diet and Weight Loss. Again, I have not said it serves no purpose, it just doesn't serve the purpose of this sub forum to the point of being a sticky. New members should have a central location, supported by MFP, to find valuable info to assist them in gaining the knowledge requires to successfully navigate through the contention that occurs in the forums. There are no questions in here that are being clarified, so I don't follow your argument of it being a safe haven for newbies. Is this designed to educate? I don't see it if it is. If you have a rational argument as to what this brings to newbies as far as helping them reach their fitness or weight goals, I'm all ears, but don't chastise me for making a valid comment that none have been able to debate within the context of my point.
Off the top of my head from just the past few weeks:
Binge eating related to stress, hormonal issues, depression, and death in the family
Overeating due to travel for work or vacation
Undereating due to underlying disordered behavior
Dealing with a family member who potentially has an eating disorder
How to handle food situations when you have out of town guests
Unlogged food, the potential psychological impact, and whether or not it's better to log it or ignore it
Workout schedule interruptions due to illness or injury
Advice for starting new workout routines or expanding existing ones
Recommendations comparing and contrasting different lifting programs
How to deal with alcohol in relation to eating and overeating
How to deal with alcohol addiction and its impact on health and weight
Exactly which of these is not relative to General Diet and Weight Loss?
You also hit the nail on the head
Thank you for actually engaging, I appreciate a good debate, especially with one who cares. Do you feel that a single thread, addressing all of those topics, quite briefly, and scattered throughout 789 pages, is helpful to the average new member? I really am not picking a fight, and appreciate different points of view. Here's mine, in more detail, since a couple seem to either care, or are perturbed by my presence. And my confession, is that my point of view is from a former newbie, who came to this sight with many assumptions, unknowns, and misguided beliefs that I held to be true. It took me a long time to understand what people talk about, and fight about, in these forums. And longer still to piece together how that all applies to what I am trying to achieve. I simply want to see new members have an easier time than I did. So here is the picture, as it is in my head....
New member joins, hoping to lose weight and gain knowledge about how to reverse whatever caused them to be where they are today. They head to the forums, to read up on current discussions, since that's what forums tend to be about. They signed up, and signed in, for the purpose of learning how to make a plan. The MFP goal setting confused them somewhat, so forums seem to be a good place to go for help. They bypass the chit chat, because they are here for a purpose. General Diet and Weight Loss seems a reasonable place to start. But they are quickly overwhelmed by numerous threads debating the validity of various acronyms they don't understand. They see a link, right at the top, created by MFP staff, "Most Helpful Posts", so they figure, good place to start, especially if it's suggested by MFP. Where I lose the story is how, with 789 pages of randomness, even if there are some good topics in here, is this thread useful enough to be given the status of "most helpful posts", as it equates to General Diet and Weight Loss. Especially for the newbies that we all seem to care about??? I accept that this thread has value to many. I accept that mental reprieve is useful, especially for the overwhelmed. The responses and number of pages alone are evident that this has become a repository for that. But, with complete honesty, I can't see how it is one of the most helpful threads in regards to THIS particular sub topic. It doesn't focus on General Diet or weight loss, and is nothing more than hundreds of pages of what happens to be on someone's mind at that point in time. Let the thread live on, but don't raise it to the level of most helpful, when there are still very simple topics that new members don't understand, and would benefit by threads clarifying the basics, without clutter.
I can't make it any more clear than that, so if anyone really wants to continue a debate, which I am happy to do, I offer to do it via PM, or a new post. Hope everyone has a pleasant evening.
Quite frankly, I believe the entire forum is about as unhelpful as possible to a new member, especially those who are also net-illiterate in general. The search functions are lacking, the group forums are completely broken, and even the most well meaning stickied threads generally devolve into arguing and trolling along the way, to the point that they are occasionally locked down just so the mods have time to delete some of the trash.
I really don't care if this is stickied or not, nor do I consider any of the stickied threads especially useful to the average newbie. I simply object to the idea that just because this thread meanders, it's not useful. You suggested it would be better suited to chit chat. You apparently don't realize that at one point, the mods moved it there. Within 6 hours it was being spammed with sexual fantasies and "confessions" about checking out women at the gym while they worked out for material to *kitten* to later. It was immediately moved back here, and lucky it survived its very brief visit to the cesspool. If it was left there, the entire tone would have changed. It would no longer be a place for new members to see that their weird habits and perceived failures were normal and not catastrophic. It would be a place for yet more fake accounts to play hot or not.
Agree 100%
I don't post a lot in any threads, but I do enjoy reading this one. I think I have posted twice in this thread, so I would consider myself a lurker. But I had to reply to this negativity. I think this thread is very helpful to new people to this forum. This one has no judgment. Well most of the time. This thread makes me realize that yes, there are other people going through the same crap that I am, the same joys that I am. My emotional well-being has a lot to do with my continued success on my change in eating habit. For me it has to be a change because I went through a recent health scare and I'm not going back there.
The reason I rarely post on the main threads is because I don't like the negative attitude. If you don't 100% believe in CICO and nothing else then how dare you post! (A bit of sarcasm there.) I enjoy reading articles that have been posted about green tea or that how many carbs affect weight loss. Will I post on them, probably not.
Thank you to the posters on this thread!
This makes me wonder how many lurkers we have0 -
smashley_mashley wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »smashley_mashley wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »qn4bx9pzg8aifd wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »Susieq_1994 wrote: »Confession: Honestly, I'm not happy with the thread being stickied. We'll very likely get an influx of sarcastic, unkind, or snarky people ruining our nice thread mojo. *sniffle*
Call me jaded, but that was my first thought too.mantium999 wrote: »
Ok, serious answer, after thinking about it a little. Honestly, I believe this thread alone has kept a bunch of us here on MFP - people who may have wandered off, lost their motivation, felt intimidated to ask questions, or unsupported elsewhere. If one person improves their health and wellness by being part of this thread, then, yes, it warrants sticky status.mantium999 wrote: »What value does this thread bring to General Diet and Weight Loss Help that warrants a sticky status? If page count is a factor, there are plenty of "who wants to see who naked" discussions in Chit Chat that are probably more worthy than this.
I have no problem with the existence of this thread. I just stand by the belief that suggested reading (ie, stickies), should be educational and pertain to the topic of the forum. As far as fun items to give people a reason to return to the site, that's what Chit Chat is for. But that's just me, don't let me rain on your parade. Obviously this thread is popular, just not informative.
"Informative" is a matter of opinion. I, for one, feel VERY "informed" when Pancake announces that he has to pee or we get health updates on various pets.
I now know 100% more about the Muslim religion than I knew a week ago. And this is a good thing.
I've learned a bunch of terms for unusual phobias.
I know how many more exotic varieties of Pop Tarts and peanut butter and breakfast cereal exist in countries other than Canada.
Knowledge is good.
Sure, informative is a matter of opinion. And I also agree that knowledge is good, I seek out lots of it! I simply fail to see the value of directing members, often times who are new, who are seeking information and knowledge about General Diet and Weight Loss (the purpose of this particular sub-forum) to this particular thread. And thank you for making my point with examples of non-diet/weight loss things your learned from this thread.
It was tongue in cheek, as I'm sure you realized. Although I do think Pop Tarts and peanut butter and cereal fall into the diet category.
There have been hundreds of diet/fitness/weight loss questions and tips posted throughout this thread, you just have to wade through 783 pages to find them. Several of us have learned a rather effective upper body workout right here.
A few effective tips, among 783 pages, warranting a status of a helpful thread. Got it.
For the sake of ceasing to derail the purpose of THIS particular thread. I confess to having 3 IPAs last night, BEFORE hitting the weights.
Well, hello, Snarkmeister...
Listen, we aren't suddenly convening before some sort of MFP Supreme Court (and you aren't some sort of Chief Judge (though you do appear to be embracing a role akin to that of a Prosecuting Attorney)), and we don't suddenly need to justify the actions of someone (let alone, someone who has nothing to do with this thread!) doing something we never requested in the first place (and, frankly, involves a reality some of us don't *want*) -- and so we shouldn't be expected to have you or anyone else 'set up kleig lights', and expect us to 'subject ourselves to interrogation' (as though you were some sort of self-appointed attorney, judge, and jury... or some such entity hellbent on seeing a perceived form of 'justice' done)...
If you don't want to participate in the thread, then please, by all means, move on...! -- that is, unless you need to rant about something (other than 'this', or 'us', that is), in which case you are welcome to rant away...!
The world has enough people p*ssing on others -- there's no need to add to *that* 'status quo' (which, not-so-ironically, is part of what this thread is about -- assisting, being helpful, not judging, etc.)...
(...and yeah, my not sprinkling your sudden sarcasm-laced insults with 'rose petals' is not exactly representative of 'this thread'... however, it is a rare thing for rudeness to 'swoop in' on this thread... and I can't stand behavior that reminds me of my favorite bumper sticker -- Mean People Suck...)
Hi there aggressive one! I have no desire to see this thread removed, pretty sure I made that clear. But I stand by what I believe to be a valid point regarding MFP choosing this as a helpful thread within the context of the sub forum in which it exists. Not attacking the participants of this thread, not the purpose of this thread, simply stating that it's purpose isn't necessarily on point with the purpose of why a thread should be a sticky. Sorry you have such a personal attachment and felt offended as a result, but I prefer logic over emotion.
she's not agressive, she's being honest.
if you're struggling so much with the purpose of this thread, and can't see how it might help newbies who are normally ripped apart for the most simplest of questions elsewhere, that's on you, not us.
There's no struggle, the purpose of this thread is not currently related to General Diet and Weight Loss. Again, I have not said it serves no purpose, it just doesn't serve the purpose of this sub forum to the point of being a sticky. New members should have a central location, supported by MFP, to find valuable info to assist them in gaining the knowledge requires to successfully navigate through the contention that occurs in the forums. There are no questions in here that are being clarified, so I don't follow your argument of it being a safe haven for newbies. Is this designed to educate? I don't see it if it is. If you have a rational argument as to what this brings to newbies as far as helping them reach their fitness or weight goals, I'm all ears, but don't chastise me for making a valid comment that none have been able to debate within the context of my point.
Off the top of my head from just the past few weeks:
Binge eating related to stress, hormonal issues, depression, and death in the family
Overeating due to travel for work or vacation
Undereating due to underlying disordered behavior
Dealing with a family member who potentially has an eating disorder
How to handle food situations when you have out of town guests
Unlogged food, the potential psychological impact, and whether or not it's better to log it or ignore it
Workout schedule interruptions due to illness or injury
Advice for starting new workout routines or expanding existing ones
Recommendations comparing and contrasting different lifting programs
How to deal with alcohol in relation to eating and overeating
How to deal with alcohol addiction and its impact on health and weight
Exactly which of these is not relative to General Diet and Weight Loss?
You also hit the nail on the head
Thank you for actually engaging, I appreciate a good debate, especially with one who cares. Do you feel that a single thread, addressing all of those topics, quite briefly, and scattered throughout 789 pages, is helpful to the average new member? I really am not picking a fight, and appreciate different points of view. Here's mine, in more detail, since a couple seem to either care, or are perturbed by my presence. And my confession, is that my point of view is from a former newbie, who came to this sight with many assumptions, unknowns, and misguided beliefs that I held to be true. It took me a long time to understand what people talk about, and fight about, in these forums. And longer still to piece together how that all applies to what I am trying to achieve. I simply want to see new members have an easier time than I did. So here is the picture, as it is in my head....
New member joins, hoping to lose weight and gain knowledge about how to reverse whatever caused them to be where they are today. They head to the forums, to read up on current discussions, since that's what forums tend to be about. They signed up, and signed in, for the purpose of learning how to make a plan. The MFP goal setting confused them somewhat, so forums seem to be a good place to go for help. They bypass the chit chat, because they are here for a purpose. General Diet and Weight Loss seems a reasonable place to start. But they are quickly overwhelmed by numerous threads debating the validity of various acronyms they don't understand. They see a link, right at the top, created by MFP staff, "Most Helpful Posts", so they figure, good place to start, especially if it's suggested by MFP. Where I lose the story is how, with 789 pages of randomness, even if there are some good topics in here, is this thread useful enough to be given the status of "most helpful posts", as it equates to General Diet and Weight Loss. Especially for the newbies that we all seem to care about??? I accept that this thread has value to many. I accept that mental reprieve is useful, especially for the overwhelmed. The responses and number of pages alone are evident that this has become a repository for that. But, with complete honesty, I can't see how it is one of the most helpful threads in regards to THIS particular sub topic. It doesn't focus on General Diet or weight loss, and is nothing more than hundreds of pages of what happens to be on someone's mind at that point in time. Let the thread live on, but don't raise it to the level of most helpful, when there are still very simple topics that new members don't understand, and would benefit by threads clarifying the basics, without clutter.
I can't make it any more clear than that, so if anyone really wants to continue a debate, which I am happy to do, I offer to do it via PM, or a new post. Hope everyone has a pleasant evening.
Quite frankly, I believe the entire forum is about as unhelpful as possible to a new member, especially those who are also net-illiterate in general. The search functions are lacking, the group forums are completely broken, and even the most well meaning stickied threads generally devolve into arguing and trolling along the way, to the point that they are occasionally locked down just so the mods have time to delete some of the trash.
I really don't care if this is stickied or not, nor do I consider any of the stickied threads especially useful to the average newbie. I simply object to the idea that just because this thread meanders, it's not useful. You suggested it would be better suited to chit chat. You apparently don't realize that at one point, the mods moved it there. Within 6 hours it was being spammed with sexual fantasies and "confessions" about checking out women at the gym while they worked out for material to *kitten* to later. It was immediately moved back here, and lucky it survived its very brief visit to the cesspool. If it was left there, the entire tone would have changed. It would no longer be a place for new members to see that their weird habits and perceived failures were normal and not catastrophic. It would be a place for yet more fake accounts to play hot or not.
Agree 100%
I don't post a lot in any threads, but I do enjoy reading this one. I think I have posted twice in this thread, so I would consider myself a lurker. But I had to reply to this negativity. I think this thread is very helpful to new people to this forum. This one has no judgment. Well most of the time. This thread makes me realize that yes, there are other people going through the same crap that I am, the same joys that I am. My emotional well-being has a lot to do with my continued success on my change in eating habit. For me it has to be a change because I went through a recent health scare and I'm not going back there.
The reason I rarely post on the main threads is because I don't like the negative attitude. If you don't 100% believe in CICO and nothing else then how dare you post! (A bit of sarcasm there.) I enjoy reading articles that have been posted about green tea or that how many carbs affect weight loss. Will I post on them, probably not.
Thank you to the posters on this thread!
This makes me wonder how many lurkers we have
Oh I'm sure tons! I lurk pretty much every thread just post mainly on this one 0 -
orangesmartie wrote: »quiksylver296 wrote: »orangesmartie wrote: »orangesmartie wrote: »Apologies for the binge posting, but I am now caught up. I tried doing the multi-quote thing once before, so there was only one post from me, but then i lost all the posts i quoted and replied to before i could hit send.
Gonna ask you all for a little advice. I go to the gym daily and mostly i tend to do cardio (treadmill) stuff, because i really like the high calorie burns my HRM gives me. But i need to do some strength stuff. I don't really know where to start and i'm too shy to ask. I thought I'd buy the NROLFW and see if i could do that. What do you think? What do you guys do?
Hello! I'm so sorry I missed this post! I started on NROLFW and I did the first stage, which was fine, but when I got to the second stage, I kind of felt like I had taken a step back because I had to learn a whole new set of moves and I didn't know how heavy I could start the weights with, so I gave up. I'm now on Strong Lifts 5x5 which is SOOOO much simpler! Only 5 exercises and you feel like you are progressing every gym session! Depends how confident you are in the gym. I felt like a complete idiot because I was trying moves I had never done before with the New Rules. The book is good for general information about strength training though, so you could still get the book and then decide? I wouldn't say the book was a waste of money. I regret nothing.
I did download the stronglift app, but i don't really get it.....?
This may have already been answered, but...
You do bench, rows and squats on Day One.
Then deadlift, OHP and squats on Day Two.
Then go back to Day One, rinse and repeat.
Take two rest days a week, at least. I only do SL 5X5 three times a week, Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
ETA: If you don't know how to do one of the lifts correctly, Youtube it.Susieq_1994 wrote: »
Awwe, that's so sweet. Yours sounds like a great gift too.Today is my anniversary and I confess that I am sad that this means I won't be able to go on my weekly bike ride with my girls bike group.
My husband is the best about anniversaries, birthdays, etc. Last year, he had the high school art teacher help him make me a soup bowl. It says "Soup for my Soulmate". I love it! I tell myself every year I'm going to start shopping early and find him the perfect gift. It never happens. I ended up buying him a ceramic statue at the garden center. He deserves so much better!
My husband has got better at gifts over the years, but I have had some real doozies (set of home phones for my 40th, for example
). I've got much better at saying "For my birthday, if you'd like to get me a present, I'd really love X". Or I tell my daughter. She's very good at relaying 'hints' and he's relieved because he can get something he knows I'll like.
My husband is amazing at picking gifts for me. I, on the other hand, am the worst gift giver on the planet. Seriously. I always default to perfume because I just can't think of anything else... Even if I know the person really well! :-/ I'm just really, really bad at it.
confession: i am awesome at gift giving. i'm the crazy type that remembers six months ago you said you really wanted something, but could never justify getting it for whatever reason. i'd bust my *kitten* to make sure the gift i gave, meant something to the person, fit who they are, or allowed them to indulge when they themselves never would/could. i rock the giving of gifts.
actual confession: it took a really long time, and a lot of secret hidden internal disappointment, to realize no one ever puts in that type of effort for me. ever. (nobody cares, boo hoo, i know. yay personal pity party) but it actually really hurts, when you really dig deep and think about it.
so i quit. i quit making little notes to remember things about people, i quit spending hours on the net to find the out of print japan only release of an album that someone just would "die" to have but could never find it. no more care packages to people far away. i stopped picking up things here and there all year round because i knew it was just PERFECT for someone. i just quit.
and it's difficult sometimes. i'll see something and be like OH! PERFECT! but then i stop myself and just keep moving. and it's really lame that something like this is making me tear up while i'm at work, so i shall stop whining now before it really opens the floodgates.
Awww. I'm the same way... or at least I try to be. Some recipients are easier than others, and I could never achieve that standard with my mother for some reason. OTOH I've given my dad some really cool things that he absolutely loves.
I get very disappointed in myself when I draw a blank, though.
Currently debating getting my SO some tool he saw in a pawn shop but wouldn't buy because he couldn't get the guy to knock $25 off the price. Apparently it will sit in the store forever because it's so obscure no one will want it. The object of the gift is twofold -- one, he will be surprised when he goes back there again to try for a price reduction and it's sold; two -- finding out that he's the new owner, eventually. The only thing that's stopping me is the fact that I have to hang onto it until Christmas, as that is the next gift giving occasion for us.
Anyway. No one has ever put that much effort into buying gifts for me either. And I hear you on "actually really hurts". But I eventually realized that some people just don't see it the same way... for them, "gift giving effort" isn't necessarily an expression of love or a measure of caring, they have other ways of showing it.
It doesn't hurt to check out Love Languages (forget who the author is but there's stuff online). It talks about different categories of how we express love, and how someone may be expressing it toward us in their "language" but we don't get the message because we don't have the same language.
I'm another one who spends hours trying to find awesome gifts and i am always disappointed by gifts i receive.
Last year's gifts i bought:
My boyfriend's birthday : a weekend at our favourite remote cottage in the Brecon Beacons, on the weekend that my girlfriend had bought him birthday tickets to see Lee Evans in Cardiff.
My girlfriend's birthday: An infinity triangle necklace that she had admired, but refused to buy. 12 deep blue roses, that are almost impossible to get (took me a month to track down).
For christmas: The main gift was joint - a 4 day trip to amsterdam. I'd booked and paid for flights and hotel, back in August last year - the trip was in March this year.. I also bought an amsterdamn guide book, a board game we'd been eyeing up, their favourite chocolate and a bottle of scent each, as well as other small things like socks with their favourite characters.
For my birthday i got: A plastic book light for my kindle. Thats it. nothing else. I cried. I've had my kindle 6 years and never yet felt the need for a clip on light. I have no idea why that was thought to be an appropriate gift. I was totally gutted by this gift. (not relevant, but their gifts to each other on their birthdays were a) most expensive and b) something they wanted). I also know that said gift was bought on the day of my birthday. I felt not only was this a cheap shoddy gift, but it showed they really didn't put much thought into it, about me, what i would like/want. and buying it on the day....it was worse than petrol station flowers.
For christmas i got some nice gifts, only one thing that i said i actually wanted (A song of Fire and Ice set). But all of my gifts were bought when they went out shopping on boxing day. I couldn't help but feel such an after thought. The reasoning was it was really the only time they had to go shopping together, and i'm really hard to buy for.
I'm not going to put so much effort in this year. i know that sounds petty. I loved their reactions to my gifts and i really wanted them to have those things.....but when compared to what i got, the negative feelings far outweighed the positive.
Yep. We always say "it's the thought that counts" so NO thought counts for a bigger slight.
Here's my gift horror story, this is the Pompous @ss Ex. He complained bitterly at every opportunity leading up to my birthday about having to buy me a birthday gift, how hard I am to buy for, blah blah. I told him he doesn't have to buy me anything, he refused to accept this, saying that I'll hold it against him forever if he doesn't, "all women are like that". His sister had a baby shortly before my birthday so we were in a store to choose a gift. I was inspecting the plush animals to find one rated as safe for < age 3 and saw one that was really cute (but not safe for an infant), pointed it out to the ex. We wander around a bit more and I pick up a pack of Christmas cards (yes, I send them) that I intend to purchase. He grabbed them out of my hand and said, "Give me those, that'll be your birthday gift." I was standing there dumbfounded. Then he ran back to the plush toys, grabbed the one I'd mentioned earlier, and bought that too. (No baby gift, however)
The worst part was he hadn't checked the price on the stuffed toy, so he got a bit of a surprise at the checkout. After we left the store he said to me in a disgusted tone, "I just spent $50 on your present??"
No, cancel that -- the WORST part is that I stayed with this tw@t for another year or so afterward, for more of the same.
edit so you know what word got asterisked out
Wow! 0 -
smashley_mashley wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »smashley_mashley wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »qn4bx9pzg8aifd wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »mantium999 wrote: »Susieq_1994 wrote: »Confession: Honestly, I'm not happy with the thread being stickied. We'll very likely get an influx of sarcastic, unkind, or snarky people ruining our nice thread mojo. *sniffle*
Call me jaded, but that was my first thought too.mantium999 wrote: »
Ok, serious answer, after thinking about it a little. Honestly, I believe this thread alone has kept a bunch of us here on MFP - people who may have wandered off, lost their motivation, felt intimidated to ask questions, or unsupported elsewhere. If one person improves their health and wellness by being part of this thread, then, yes, it warrants sticky status.mantium999 wrote: »What value does this thread bring to General Diet and Weight Loss Help that warrants a sticky status? If page count is a factor, there are plenty of "who wants to see who naked" discussions in Chit Chat that are probably more worthy than this.
I have no problem with the existence of this thread. I just stand by the belief that suggested reading (ie, stickies), should be educational and pertain to the topic of the forum. As far as fun items to give people a reason to return to the site, that's what Chit Chat is for. But that's just me, don't let me rain on your parade. Obviously this thread is popular, just not informative.
"Informative" is a matter of opinion. I, for one, feel VERY "informed" when Pancake announces that he has to pee or we get health updates on various pets.
I now know 100% more about the Muslim religion than I knew a week ago. And this is a good thing.
I've learned a bunch of terms for unusual phobias.
I know how many more exotic varieties of Pop Tarts and peanut butter and breakfast cereal exist in countries other than Canada.
Knowledge is good.
Sure, informative is a matter of opinion. And I also agree that knowledge is good, I seek out lots of it! I simply fail to see the value of directing members, often times who are new, who are seeking information and knowledge about General Diet and Weight Loss (the purpose of this particular sub-forum) to this particular thread. And thank you for making my point with examples of non-diet/weight loss things your learned from this thread.
It was tongue in cheek, as I'm sure you realized. Although I do think Pop Tarts and peanut butter and cereal fall into the diet category.
There have been hundreds of diet/fitness/weight loss questions and tips posted throughout this thread, you just have to wade through 783 pages to find them. Several of us have learned a rather effective upper body workout right here.
A few effective tips, among 783 pages, warranting a status of a helpful thread. Got it.
For the sake of ceasing to derail the purpose of THIS particular thread. I confess to having 3 IPAs last night, BEFORE hitting the weights.
Well, hello, Snarkmeister...
Listen, we aren't suddenly convening before some sort of MFP Supreme Court (and you aren't some sort of Chief Judge (though you do appear to be embracing a role akin to that of a Prosecuting Attorney)), and we don't suddenly need to justify the actions of someone (let alone, someone who has nothing to do with this thread!) doing something we never requested in the first place (and, frankly, involves a reality some of us don't *want*) -- and so we shouldn't be expected to have you or anyone else 'set up kleig lights', and expect us to 'subject ourselves to interrogation' (as though you were some sort of self-appointed attorney, judge, and jury... or some such entity hellbent on seeing a perceived form of 'justice' done)...
If you don't want to participate in the thread, then please, by all means, move on...! -- that is, unless you need to rant about something (other than 'this', or 'us', that is), in which case you are welcome to rant away...!
The world has enough people p*ssing on others -- there's no need to add to *that* 'status quo' (which, not-so-ironically, is part of what this thread is about -- assisting, being helpful, not judging, etc.)...
(...and yeah, my not sprinkling your sudden sarcasm-laced insults with 'rose petals' is not exactly representative of 'this thread'... however, it is a rare thing for rudeness to 'swoop in' on this thread... and I can't stand behavior that reminds me of my favorite bumper sticker -- Mean People Suck...)
Hi there aggressive one! I have no desire to see this thread removed, pretty sure I made that clear. But I stand by what I believe to be a valid point regarding MFP choosing this as a helpful thread within the context of the sub forum in which it exists. Not attacking the participants of this thread, not the purpose of this thread, simply stating that it's purpose isn't necessarily on point with the purpose of why a thread should be a sticky. Sorry you have such a personal attachment and felt offended as a result, but I prefer logic over emotion.
she's not agressive, she's being honest.
if you're struggling so much with the purpose of this thread, and can't see how it might help newbies who are normally ripped apart for the most simplest of questions elsewhere, that's on you, not us.
There's no struggle, the purpose of this thread is not currently related to General Diet and Weight Loss. Again, I have not said it serves no purpose, it just doesn't serve the purpose of this sub forum to the point of being a sticky. New members should have a central location, supported by MFP, to find valuable info to assist them in gaining the knowledge requires to successfully navigate through the contention that occurs in the forums. There are no questions in here that are being clarified, so I don't follow your argument of it being a safe haven for newbies. Is this designed to educate? I don't see it if it is. If you have a rational argument as to what this brings to newbies as far as helping them reach their fitness or weight goals, I'm all ears, but don't chastise me for making a valid comment that none have been able to debate within the context of my point.
Off the top of my head from just the past few weeks:
Binge eating related to stress, hormonal issues, depression, and death in the family
Overeating due to travel for work or vacation
Undereating due to underlying disordered behavior
Dealing with a family member who potentially has an eating disorder
How to handle food situations when you have out of town guests
Unlogged food, the potential psychological impact, and whether or not it's better to log it or ignore it
Workout schedule interruptions due to illness or injury
Advice for starting new workout routines or expanding existing ones
Recommendations comparing and contrasting different lifting programs
How to deal with alcohol in relation to eating and overeating
How to deal with alcohol addiction and its impact on health and weight
Exactly which of these is not relative to General Diet and Weight Loss?
You also hit the nail on the head
Thank you for actually engaging, I appreciate a good debate, especially with one who cares. Do you feel that a single thread, addressing all of those topics, quite briefly, and scattered throughout 789 pages, is helpful to the average new member? I really am not picking a fight, and appreciate different points of view. Here's mine, in more detail, since a couple seem to either care, or are perturbed by my presence. And my confession, is that my point of view is from a former newbie, who came to this sight with many assumptions, unknowns, and misguided beliefs that I held to be true. It took me a long time to understand what people talk about, and fight about, in these forums. And longer still to piece together how that all applies to what I am trying to achieve. I simply want to see new members have an easier time than I did. So here is the picture, as it is in my head....
New member joins, hoping to lose weight and gain knowledge about how to reverse whatever caused them to be where they are today. They head to the forums, to read up on current discussions, since that's what forums tend to be about. They signed up, and signed in, for the purpose of learning how to make a plan. The MFP goal setting confused them somewhat, so forums seem to be a good place to go for help. They bypass the chit chat, because they are here for a purpose. General Diet and Weight Loss seems a reasonable place to start. But they are quickly overwhelmed by numerous threads debating the validity of various acronyms they don't understand. They see a link, right at the top, created by MFP staff, "Most Helpful Posts", so they figure, good place to start, especially if it's suggested by MFP. Where I lose the story is how, with 789 pages of randomness, even if there are some good topics in here, is this thread useful enough to be given the status of "most helpful posts", as it equates to General Diet and Weight Loss. Especially for the newbies that we all seem to care about??? I accept that this thread has value to many. I accept that mental reprieve is useful, especially for the overwhelmed. The responses and number of pages alone are evident that this has become a repository for that. But, with complete honesty, I can't see how it is one of the most helpful threads in regards to THIS particular sub topic. It doesn't focus on General Diet or weight loss, and is nothing more than hundreds of pages of what happens to be on someone's mind at that point in time. Let the thread live on, but don't raise it to the level of most helpful, when there are still very simple topics that new members don't understand, and would benefit by threads clarifying the basics, without clutter.
I can't make it any more clear than that, so if anyone really wants to continue a debate, which I am happy to do, I offer to do it via PM, or a new post. Hope everyone has a pleasant evening.
Quite frankly, I believe the entire forum is about as unhelpful as possible to a new member, especially those who are also net-illiterate in general. The search functions are lacking, the group forums are completely broken, and even the most well meaning stickied threads generally devolve into arguing and trolling along the way, to the point that they are occasionally locked down just so the mods have time to delete some of the trash.
I really don't care if this is stickied or not, nor do I consider any of the stickied threads especially useful to the average newbie. I simply object to the idea that just because this thread meanders, it's not useful. You suggested it would be better suited to chit chat. You apparently don't realize that at one point, the mods moved it there. Within 6 hours it was being spammed with sexual fantasies and "confessions" about checking out women at the gym while they worked out for material to *kitten* to later. It was immediately moved back here, and lucky it survived its very brief visit to the cesspool. If it was left there, the entire tone would have changed. It would no longer be a place for new members to see that their weird habits and perceived failures were normal and not catastrophic. It would be a place for yet more fake accounts to play hot or not.
Agree 100%
I don't post a lot in any threads, but I do enjoy reading this one. I think I have posted twice in this thread, so I would consider myself a lurker. But I had to reply to this negativity. I think this thread is very helpful to new people to this forum. This one has no judgment. Well most of the time. This thread makes me realize that yes, there are other people going through the same crap that I am, the same joys that I am. My emotional well-being has a lot to do with my continued success on my change in eating habit. For me it has to be a change because I went through a recent health scare and I'm not going back there.
The reason I rarely post on the main threads is because I don't like the negative attitude. If you don't 100% believe in CICO and nothing else then how dare you post! (A bit of sarcasm there.) I enjoy reading articles that have been posted about green tea or that how many carbs affect weight loss. Will I post on them, probably not.
Thank you to the posters on this thread!
This makes me wonder how many lurkers we have
Oh I'm sure tons! I lurk pretty much every thread just post mainly on this one
I have been reading/following this thread since the very first day...yet I only just started posting myself about 2 weeks ago. I bet a lot of people are the same.0 -
I confess to being a lurker! This is my first post ever but I have been reading this thread since day one and joined the group because I couldn't bear the thought of all of you wonderful people that I don't know leaving me behind. I can relate to so much of what has been said here and it truly keeps me coming back to this site. I wanted my first post to be something interesting and exciting but I am at a loss and a bit short on time at the moment so I promise that I will post a real honest to goodness confession soon!
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Congrats on officially becoming a non-lurker!I confess to being a lurker! This is my first post ever but I have been reading this thread since day one and joined the group because I couldn't bear the thought of all of you wonderful people that I don't know leaving me behind. I can relate to so much of what has been said here and it truly keeps me coming back to this site. I wanted my first post to be something interesting and exciting but I am at a loss and a bit short on time at the moment so I promise that I will post a real honest to goodness confession soon!
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I confess to being a lurker! This is my first post ever but I have been reading this thread since day one and joined the group because I couldn't bear the thought of all of you wonderful people that I don't know leaving me behind. I can relate to so much of what has been said here and it truly keeps me coming back to this site. I wanted my first post to be something interesting and exciting but I am at a loss and a bit short on time at the moment so I promise that I will post a real honest to goodness confession soon!
Hey no pressure Welcome, the more the merrier! 0 -
I confess to being a lurker! This is my first post ever but I have been reading this thread since day one and joined the group because I couldn't bear the thought of all of you wonderful people that I don't know leaving me behind. I can relate to so much of what has been said here and it truly keeps me coming back to this site. I wanted my first post to be something interesting and exciting but I am at a loss and a bit short on time at the moment so I promise that I will post a real honest to goodness confession soon!
Welcome! 0 -
xMrBunglex wrote: »xMrBunglex wrote: »I confess that I about died Monday when I saw that Faith No More had just booked a show at Red Rocks in September...Got my tickets on Wednesday - 25th row! (sold out this morning.)
My favorite band in the entire universe. THE. ENTIRE. UNIVERSE.
I was so sad when they called it quits in '98 & thought they'd always just be music that I would throw on & wax nostalgic for the hard-partying 90s. When they did get together and perform in later years, it was always overseas.
Now it's 2015, they've got a new album out (solid B+ as far as reunions go) and they're playing at M************ RED ROCKS. 5 minutes from my house. If you couldn't tell, I am FAR BEYOND STOKED.
Is it a one off at Red Rocks or a legit tour?
Legit tour: http://www.fnm.com/tour-dates.shtml
My wife & I were going to take a trip to see them in Dallas or Raleigh, but we held off...thank god. The last show was Sept 8 in Seattle, until they just announced the Red Rocks show & the Chicago festival. They've been adding dates here & there for the last month!
Ugh, I want to go to Riot, but I have to grownup that weekend 0 -
noaddedsugarx wrote: »It's been the most traumatic day. I've mentioned here before about being a full time carer for my Grandma who suffers with dementia.
Today she had a bad fall from the top to the very bottom of the stairs. She hit her head and has suffered bruising and bleeding to the brain and fractured her skull in two places along with breaking her elbow. The Doctors say there's nothing they can do but to wait it out and see if the bruising on her brain heals itself within the next 48-72 hours and her condition is going to get worse before/if it gets better. If it does heal itself they don't know what her level of function will be after.
I'm sick with worry and there's nothing I can do. It was 12 hours in hospital before she got seen by a specialist after lying there drowsy with a confirmed bleed on the brain!
I can't help thinking somehow that this is my fault and I should have been watching her (I was in my bedroom getting dressed) even though she is always steady on her feet and hasn't had a problem with stairs at least recently anyway. If she doesn't recover from this I don't think I'll be able to forgive myself.
I will keep your grandma in my prayers.0 -
raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »I'm starting to get a little concerned over here, AF is as of now 3 days late. Ugh! (May or may not be a little TMI)
You must've missed the dog poop posts. That's not even remotely TMI. Good luck with whichever way you want this particular worry to go 1 -
@Glinda1971 I really think I may have nightmares tonight after googling "trypophobia" and hitting images oh my lord how disgusting. I do not think you're weird at all I think I have the same thing and never knew what it was!
Ditto! I was like AH can't unsee, can't UNSEE!
Someone should pass around the eye bleach.
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I usually weigh in on Sundays, but I am away this weekend (long weekend, woohoo!), so I weighed in on Friday morning. Before I did, I caught a glimpse of my side-view in the bathroom mirror, frowned and thought, "My tummy looks visibly smaller. But that can't be right. Must be an optical illusion."
I was right! I'd got a woosh, lost 1.2kg in a week, bringing my total loss to 5.3kg and taking me under 105kg for the first time in over a year! I may have done the happy dance around my bathroom. It's not much, but it's something, and it's going to be even better soon, I am determined!
Also, I promised myself a new jacket for skating when I got under 105. Guess I get to go shopping now, woot!0 -
smashley_mashley wrote: »kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »smashley_mashley wrote: »Confession: When I am at work and have to go #2, I take my phone with me so I can't read this thread
I hate when I have to poop really badly & someone is in the stall right next to me.
Is is funny b/c it is so true!!
I also hate (and I am not sure if I have posted this here or in the "Things That Make You Irrationally Angry" thread when there are multiple open stalls and you give yourself some space and someone take the stall right beside you. Okay, this just downright pisses me of when people do this.
The only time I'll do that is if someone makes a mess in all of the other stalls. How hard is it for people to flush the commode in a public restroom? If you don't want to touch the handle then at least use your shoe or grab a piece of toilet paper.0 -
FluffySandwich wrote: »These bathroom posts are so hilarious to me, and so true
One thing I find really weird is when someone is using the bathroom and talking on their cellphone at the same time. I was in a stall at my University when a girl took the stall next to me. I proceeded to hear a series of loud farts as she communicated cheerfully with a friend on the phone. I was blown away by how much she just didn't care.
OMG! Bwahahahahahaha! Now that's hilarious.
Imagine what the other person on the end is thinking.0 -
raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »I'm starting to get a little concerned over here, AF is as of now 3 days late. Ugh! (May or may not be a little TMI)
You must've missed the dog poop posts. That's not even remotely TMI. Good luck with whichever way you want this particular worry to go
Thank you. I'm wondering if me doing this weight loss thing seriously is affecting that. I don't want to get my hopes up for the other as it's a slim chance, but I wouldn't mind it. Except, I'd have to quit my job again....0 -
I usually weigh in on Sundays, but I am away this weekend (long weekend, woohoo!), so I weighed in on Friday morning. Before I did, I caught a glimpse of my side-view in the bathroom mirror, frowned and thought, "My tummy looks visibly smaller. But that can't be right. Must be an optical illusion."
I was right! I'd got a woosh, lost 1.2kg in a week, bringing my total loss to 5.3kg and taking me under 105kg for the first time in over a year! I may have done the happy dance around my bathroom. It's not much, but it's something, and it's going to be even better soon, I am determined!
Also, I promised myself a new jacket for skating when I got under 105. Guess I get to go shopping now, woot!
Yayyy congrats!0
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