Adding MFP Friends as a married guy
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One of the other responders said this is not a dating site and I have to agree with her. This is just for losing weight. If you are cruising around the boards and you see someone who has goals similar to yours send them a friend request. No one is going to think you are hitting on them.0
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It seems to me that there is a lot of insecurity -- personal and interpersonal -- floating around in here.0
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Dicky_Seamus wrote: »Both of you should work 5x5 Trust Curls into your routine, brah. No rest between sets.
(...and people say gays are destroying the sanctity of marriage....oi....)
What people? And would you mind slapping them for me0 -
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One of the other responders said this is not a dating site and I have to agree with her. This is just for losing weight. If you are cruising around the boards and you see someone who has goals similar to yours send them a friend request. No one is going to think you are hitting on them.
There will be more posts in the "would you kiss the person above you" thread today than in all the weight-loss-related threads on MFP.
This place is basically Tinder without the swiping, but with better gifs.0 -
asflatasapancake wrote: »Dicky_Seamus wrote: »Both of you should work 5x5 Trust Curls into your routine, brah. No rest between sets.
(...and people say gays are destroying the sanctity of marriage....oi....)
Strong first post.
OP, I'm a dude who is serious about staying in shape. Add me if you wish. That way your wife will be less likely to delete your account.
Yeah, but if he has too high a brah-to-bra ratio, she'll start questioning his gender preference.
There's nothing you can do about suspicious people...0 -
pollypocket1021 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »pollypocket1021 wrote: »barbecuesauce wrote: »85Cardinals wrote: »Y'all are really piling on pollypocket here. After about 40 posts slamming her, I think she's got the idea.
It's a forum. Sometimes people don't read the replies before they post. Didn't see one where she asked for a white knight either.
Lol. I know most people don't approach life or relationships like I do.
But since I'm in a very small minority with regard to interacting with people as a married woman, it would maybe give the OP some perspective on how reasonable his wife is.
And nothing I my original post is exaggerated.
You have respect for your relationship, and your husbands feelings. I totally get where you're coming from
Sure respect, but is that enough?
I'm not married etc so maybe I don't have the right idea.
But what about trust? What about being 2 individuals that are married?
Just seems odd and what polly has said so far, if it sounded one sided it would be setting off alarms with me of an abusive or controlling relationship, but it seems like it's from both people, and polly seems happy about it so who am I to judge.
Maybe I should preface with the fact that I used to work somewhere where married people having affairs with coworkers was the norm. It was openly talked an joked about. There were days when I was asked out for drinks after work before I clocked in.
I didn't want that to become acceptable or normal for me, so I made sure that everything in my life was completely open and transparent to my husband and I drew certain lines in the sand. Having the joint account also sent a clear message to my coworkers. 10 years later, those lines are still drawn and I am very comfortable with where they are. It's about me being honest and accountable.
So no abuse, just fallout from the Petri dish that I assume most teaching hospitals are.
Lulz. I worked at a teaching hospital for 8 years and was asked out by staff a total of zero times. That is most definitely not the norm.0 -
mjtranter65 wrote: »So....here is the issue:
I have an imbalance of female MFP friends to male. My wife (who is not part of MFP) thinks its a bit weird (me too, I guess). The reason I have not requested male MFP friends is because it seems weird to ask because, well, just because. There are some guys that have really similar self improvement and similar goals, but I suppose the issue is that requesting is weird. That said, if your a dude and are serious about getting (and staying) fit, please add me.
Thanks....i hope.
Hey, I getcha. I'd feel weird if I had a big gender imbalance in my friends list as well.
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I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.0
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I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
It would be up to your husband to shut that down if he so chooses. There will always be temptation.0 -
I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
So someone who says' Hi Sweetie' isn't acting decent?. This thread goes from the sublime to the ridiculous0 -
I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
It would be up to your husband to shut that down if he so chooses. There will always be temptation.
Yep. Not those girls' fault, it would be all on him.
Personally, I only accept friend requests from women for two reasons: a) our goals are more likely to be similar (especially as I'm fairly petite...not a lot of adult men maintain on 1500 cals and it can be hard for them to understand why I eat what I eat), and b) men who send me requests either include no reason at all (and they're total strangers, so...why?) or it's something flirty, which I'm not interested in. But that's just me.I have a lot of male friends IRL and he doesn't mind at all because he trusts me. I trust him too and I have never had an issue with him having female friends either.0 -
I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
It would be up to your husband to shut that down if he so chooses. There will always be temptation.
I'm single, I guess I meant it from an observer's perspective - in 'real' life I don't see girls heavily flirting like that (I don't go to bars like I used to lol) but here it is all out, all the time it seems. So it seems to me that for a lot of women this site is primarily a pickup spot, and they do not care about single/married, so I don't think it's crazy for a wife to be concerned. But yes of course it is each person's responsibility to be respectful to his or her partner.0 -
isulo_kura wrote: »I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
So someone who says' Hi Sweetie' isn't acting decent?. This thread goes from the sublime to the ridiculous
TRUTH!!0 -
I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
It would be up to your husband to shut that down if he so chooses. There will always be temptation.
I'm single, I guess I meant it from an observer's perspective - in 'real' life I don't see girls heavily flirting like that (I don't go to bars like I used to lol) but here it is all out, all the time it seems. So it seems to me that for a lot of women this site is primarily a pickup spot, and they do not care about single/married, so I don't think it's crazy for a wife to be concerned. But yes of course it is each person's responsibility to be respectful to his or her partner.
Sweetie and babe is now flirting? This thread delivers.0 -
isulo_kura wrote: »I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
So someone who says' Hi Sweetie' isn't acting decent?. This thread goes from the sublime to the ridiculous
TRUTH!!
Lol I was going to say that's pretty par for the course in the south, but it's said to both men and women by women.
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asflatasapancake wrote: »How about if I said I'd like to mount you over my fireplace? Is that considered flirting?
Only if you use "sweety".0 -
With the exception of one, all of my male MFP friends are people I knew in real life. None of the females are. Guy friends are less sensitive about a person in real life being all up in their weight business. I am a non-threatening single gray haired old lady so I have it easy.0
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I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
Since when is posting an innocuous comment such as 'Hi babe' or 'Great job handsome' on a male friend's profile or status not "acting decent". Harmless flirting with someone does not mean I want to jump in bed with them. Most adults understand that.
Ninety percent of my FL is male, most of them are married. They're great guys! I don't see a problem with it and neither does my husband.
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asflatasapancake wrote: »How about if I said I'd like to mount you over my fireplace? Is that considered flirting?
Flirting.
I'd like to mount your head over my fireplace.
No.0 -
rushbabe0214 wrote: »I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
Since when is posting an innocuous comment such as 'Hi babe' or 'Great job handsome' on a male friend's profile or status not "acting decent". Harmless flirting with someone does not mean I want to jump in bed with them. Most adults understand that.
Ninety percent of my FL is male, most of them are married. They're great guys! I don't see a problem with it and neither does my husband.
He's probably on MFP himself, trolling the "kiss the person above" thread.
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rushbabe0214 wrote: »I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
Since when is posting an innocuous comment such as 'Hi babe' or 'Great job handsome' on a male friend's profile or status not "acting decent". Harmless flirting with someone does not mean I want to jump in bed with them. Most adults understand that.
Ninety percent of my FL is male, most of them are married. They're great guys! I don't see a problem with it and neither does my husband.
He's probably on MFP himself, trolling the "kiss the person above" thread.
LOL!
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isulo_kura wrote: »I have a few married male friends on here and whenever I see their feeds it's all girls going "hiiii sweetie" and "u look so good babe" and stuff like that, so if my husband were on here I'd be careful about his friends list as well. I don't know who these chicks are who can't act decent but...they're all over this site.
So someone who says' Hi Sweetie' isn't acting decent?. This thread goes from the sublime to the ridiculous
TRUTH!!
x2!!!!0 -
I can't help but think of the Seinfeld show they had to finish any comment about something weird with "not that there is anything wrong with that".0
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FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »kyrannosaurus wrote: »What's weird about that? Your wife needs to worry less. Plenty of men have lots of female friends (online and in real life). It doesn't mean anything at all!
You must be unaware of what goes on here at MFP…FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »OP: This sounds like a personal problem. You have male friends in real life, I'm assuming. Assuming you have Facebook or other social media, surely you've requested males there before. So why is it weird to send a male a friend request on MFP? This is a fitness website; if you request a male, they aren't going to think you're hitting on them. Trust me. However, I can't say the same for some of the women here. If you stick around long enough, you'll understand what I mean.
I take exception to your repeated inference that there is hanky-panky going on at MFP. I have both male and female friends here. I have never propositioned nor been propositioned here (in a year) so I can only assume you get back what you put out.
My friends on MFP (male and female) are supportive and respectful.
@socalkay No offense but you're nearly 60 years old. I'm not too sure how much "hanky-panky" goes on here with people of/near your age- which is most likely why you've never propositioned or been propositioned. Or they're just not interested…
Also, let me take a wild guess… you're one of those people who think women who have been raped "asked for it." As someone who works with rape victims on a daily basis, I would advise you not say stuff like "you get back what you put out."0 -
One of the other responders said this is not a dating site and I have to agree with her. This is just for losing weight. If you are cruising around the boards and you see someone who has goals similar to yours send them a friend request. No one is going to think you are hitting on them.
Lawls you must be new
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