Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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Aww thanks. I always wanted sisters. I didn't have much useful guidance so I am a bit of a later bloomer. I do my best and try to learn from my plethora of mistakes.rungirl1973 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »
Chiming in here....your date is probably over already, hope it went well!
post date update:
met the dude at a tavern downtown. really super nice guy. had good conversation, were able to laugh and joke a lot, which is awesome. not creepy and not meh (woo!) lol
issues i'm currently trying to reconcile in my brain: (remember NO JUDGEMENT)
- if i hadn't met him on a dating website, where orientation is posted, i would NEVER believe this guy is straight. i texted my friend (who is gay) that i was on a date with his straight doppelganger. so many times through out the night in my head i was just like, omg this is frank, i'm on a date with straight frank. boisterous, animated, like that always turned on and ready to take the stage personality.
- very very talkative. which isn't terrible, but he'd ask me something and half way through my story, he'd being going off on a tangent on something else, and completely cut me off. so like, a 3 minute story would take me like 10 minutes as i'd have to reel him back off the tangent, pick up where i left off and keep going. and the random tangents were funny and he had tons of interesting things to talk about, but seriously talked way more than me. way, way more.
- he's about an inch taller than me, and has a much more slender build. i'm quite "thick," i have tree trunk thighs that aren't going anywhere. so it's kinda like oh, here's dude and his fat girlfriend. and maybe that's dumb of me to think, but i do.
he did say he had a really good time and would like to see me again. which i might do to see if maybe he was just nervous/excited on the "first" date?
Glad he wasn't crazy.
I'd go out with him again and see how that goes. He may have been a nervous talker?
My husband is a little ADHD. He'll tell a story, go off on a tangent, and I have to reel him back in regularly. I've gotten used to that. That point hit home for me. LOL
I also sometimes have to say, "Can I finish my story?" when he cuts me off. He doesn't even realize he's doing it.
That's different than somebody who's so stuck on himself that he won't listen to you...
Interesting! So are you saying that you think he's actually gay but dating women, or that he just reminded you of your gay friend?pofoster21 wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »
Chiming in here....your date is probably over already, hope it went well!
post date update:
met the dude at a tavern downtown. really super nice guy. had good conversation, were able to laugh and joke a lot, which is awesome. not creepy and not meh (woo!) lol
issues i'm currently trying to reconcile in my brain: (remember NO JUDGEMENT)
- if i hadn't met him on a dating website, where orientation is posted, i would NEVER believe this guy is straight. i texted my friend (who is gay) that i was on a date with his straight doppelganger. so many times through out the night in my head i was just like, omg this is frank, i'm on a date with straight frank. boisterous, animated, like that always turned on and ready to take the stage personality.
- very very talkative. which isn't terrible, but he'd ask me something and half way through my story, he'd being going off on a tangent on something else, and completely cut me off. so like, a 3 minute story would take me like 10 minutes as i'd have to reel him back off the tangent, pick up where i left off and keep going. and the random tangents were funny and he had tons of interesting things to talk about, but seriously talked way more than me. way, way more.
- he's about an inch taller than me, and has a much more slender build. i'm quite "thick," i have tree trunk thighs that aren't going anywhere. so it's kinda like oh, here's dude and his fat girlfriend. and maybe that's dumb of me to think, but i do.
he did say he had a really good time and would like to see me again. which i might do to see if maybe he was just nervous/excited on the "first" date?
I think you should definitely see him again, if only because you might make a great friend. Unless he talks too much!
Also, regarding physical differences, just to say that my parents are the same height, but for most of their marriage she's been probably a hundred pounds heavier than him. He's loved her and been attracted to her for 52 years, so try not to stress over that side of things.
I was going to say the same thing about the follow up date. If nothing else, maybe you will make a friend that is fun to talk to.
My parents are the same way as well. My mom is heavier than my dad but he has always loved her so much. They look fine together to me.
these give me hope
If nothing else, you are learning more about you, about what works for you and what does not work for you. If he is right for you and you are right for him that is wonderful. If that is not the case, no worries, you are that much closer to the right one!
I think I read the average number of "dates" to find the right one is 70. YIKES! I learned so much about myself in the time I spent dating. I got some funny stories too. There was a sweetheart of a man who really liked me, he was interesting and fun. He, sadly, looked JUST like my younger brother. I couldn't even go on a second date with him.
There was the one who looked (even more sadly) JUST like my former sister in law. I could barely look at him on our coffee date. As the numbers went I think I had (in about six months) 700+ emails of any kind, 100+ email and/or phone conversations, 30+ first dates, 5 second dates, 2 3rd and 4th dates and 4th date with SO is where he asked me to be his girlfriend (awwww). So - it is plain and simple a numbers game. You screen, you meet, you screen, you talk, etc. Take breaks as needed. I would also strongly recommend no more than 2 or maybe 3 dates a week and no more than one a day if you are in the dating pool awhile. No need to burn out on it, it should be fun. Good luck. You are super great!!!! No settling, get Mr. Super Great.
ETA: I "learned" to date in my 40's. I never "dated" like that before, I didn't know how to do it. It was so fun and cool (and scary) to discover so much about myself. I was always 100% myself and clear that I was looking for a good relationship. I did work hard on keeping good boundaries and only dating men who didn't raise red flags.
Nonoelmo your advice is so spot-on about everything! I don't have any sisters, but if I did, I would love her to be like you. And when I become a mother, I hope I'm as in tune as you clearly are with your kids. Internet hugs all-round.
I'm becoming a little fan-girlish I realise.
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@MoHousdon gorgeous ring & glad to hear your step daughter took the cat off of your hands!0
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Hi @Susieq_1994!
@orangesmartie, I hope you can work things out soon! Thank you for sharing your story with us.
Edited because I can't type.0 -
@MoHousdon - Love the ring. So glad you had an awesome time!0
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My daughters hair!.... I brush it constantly. Knotted up. I keep pushing her to be more SELF AWARE and start doing things for herself and without prompts. The struggle is real.
I will say I am quite proficient at simple braids though. I need to learn to french braid.
You sound like a fabulous dad!0 -
So I finished Survivor 30 last night and today I'm on 29 (I prefer it to the other Blood vs. Water because there are new people). Going to try to be a bit more productive today, though.0
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Talking of 'girly' things, I'm right there with you. I really need a new sewing machine and I want this one with the fire of a thousand suns. It's stupid expensive, and doesn't have all the features I need, but it's sooooo pretty....
I still need to learn how to run the one I own!!! My mother sewed a lot and I never learned from her before she passed. That is something truly missed out on.
I know the feeling. My Grandma was a seamstress extraordinaire. She had 6 grandkids and I was the only girl so I had loads of amazing handmade dresses (pity I was such a tomboy). I taught myself to sew a few years after she passed. I wish I'd started sooner when she was still around. I haven't tried clothing (although I can do basic alterations) but I'm a dab hand at patchwork and quilting. It can be done, just be prepared to think your first few projects are amazing then a couple of months later to realise they were rubbish! It's fun to learn (and to improve).
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It isn't always easy to watch people eating what you really want. So, I don't judge. I just remind myself that they will have spammy pimples, watery bloat and rotten teeth and I will remain FABULOUS!strangeling06 wrote: »It makes me feel bad when I'm trying to eat healthy and people are eating fried, greasy, salty, sugary, etc. foods right in front of me. I know it shouldn't effect me so much, but it does
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pofoster21 wrote: »quiksylver296 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »quiksylver296 wrote: »rungirl1973 wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »Hi guys, checking in. I went camping over the weekend and it was pretty nice. It was my kid's first time camping in the actual outdoor woods. I know people do it, but I was very worried about camping with any babies, so this year was the first year I felt comfortable. They loved it, and I'm so glad because I plan on taking them out a lot this summer.
The thread is messed up for me and I lost my spot. If I missed anything someone said to me, I'm sorry. I haven't heard back from the police about my sister yet. I guess they don't care as much if someone pretends to be you as a witness instead of a criminal.
Thirdly - I saw someone mention Goodreads. If anyone wants to add me, you can! I love sharing books with friends.
https://www.goodreads.com/user/show/8630108-amber
I added you.
My name is Tammy, and my Siamese kitty Max is my profile pic there.
https://goodreads.com/user/show/5477691-tammy
Trying to fix so I can link...
Ok, I created a profile and added you both!
https://www.goodreads.com/review/list/44563667
Hope this works to link to me
Nice! I think Goodreads gives much better book recommendations than Amazon. Amazon is always recommending books that I bought from them. I already read that!
I never heard of goodreads, I am going to check it out after I finish catching up. But if we share book recommendations it won't do much to link to me... I mostly read historical romances these days as my poor brain can't handle anything else.
I read some of those, too , when I get in a mood. I read one that had Fabio on the cover the other day. Fabio...LOL
Is that from the 1980s?
Probably. I didn't look at the copyright. I get books at the used book store, and they have discounted books for 25 cents and I grab whatever catches my attention. Some are from the 70's and 80's, but I've read some really good books that way.0 -
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spacequiztime wrote: »I've never been a fan of pickles. I can't imagine them fried.
Blasphemy! However, to be helpful I will have all your dill pickles. The sweet pickles can go die in a fire though.
Amen to that! I hate when I grab a pickle, pop it in my mouth, and then find out it is a sweet pickle. Gag.0 -
pofoster21 wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »@pofoster21 - Love the shoes, although not sure how you walk in those! I can't wait until I drop some more weight so I can wear cute shoes again. I wear tennis shoes to work at the moment. It helps me to get in more steps. Also, we have a program that awards leave time every quarter if you get a certain number of minutes of exercise every month. Totally worth it!
Platforms. I keep telling you ladies this. Seriously. Try them.
Agreed...I hate wearing heels, but I can wear wedges all day long!0 -
rungirl1973 wrote: »My 20 year old boy got his "proposed treatment plan" from the dentist. I don't think there's a tooth that doesn't need something. We're talking about $15k worth of dental work. I don't have any words. I want to throttle him.
Wow! I was sharing with my 7 year old that I knew some people with kids who didn't brush their teeth when they were his age and now their teeth are ruined. He was mortified and brushed extra well last night and this morning!0 -
girldownsouth wrote: »WestCoastJo82 wrote: »That sewing machine! I want!
Mine is just a basic little Brother but it is pale pink - I can't claim responsibility for that though as it was my mother's before she decided she needed a fancier one.
I'm glad you all understand my feelings about frying food in the house. Soooo stinky. We don't have an exhaust fan over our stove either (or anywhere in the kitchen), so everything I cook lingers unless I open the windows. Not too practical in our minus 40 degree winters either as it's a recipe for a burst water pipe.
The smell of Saturday morning bacon haunts me all weekend, too, it's terrible.
So this doesn't help in the winter, but fry outside! I used to have a fry daddy that I could plug in, so I would plug it into the outdoor outlet and fry away. I'm debating setting up my camping stove outside the next time I do fried chicken to keep the fry smell outside, and I feel like that should work as well.
Re gross girls: I was an odd combination of total tomboy that loved to get dirty and rough house, but I would do it while wearing the most frilly dresses possible. My face and hair was always a super-mess though.
My daughters hair!.... I brush it constantly. Knotted up. I keep pushing her to be more SELF AWARE and start doing things for herself and without prompts. The struggle is real.
I will say I am quite proficient at simple braids though. I need to learn to french braid.
I have long hair, down to nearly the bottom of my back. Sometimes I discover massive knots that seem to take up residence in my ponytail. I am 32 and need to be more self aware too!! loooove me some long hair. Brings out the *RAWR* in me. 
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Haha @lilaclovebird you were such a cute little girl!!
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kelly_c_77 wrote: »WestCoastJo82 wrote: »Well, this is totally not a real problem, but pity party commenced. (Warning this is rather lame and I really just need to be told suck it up buttercup).
I hate how bothered I am by numbers on the scale. I'm recomping currently - which should not include weight gain as I am not attempting to bulk - but I've been over the top number I would like to be at for a couple of weeks now. I know it's probably just DOMS as Stronglifts is kicking my butt and my clothes fit the same if not better, but it really gets to me and I'm considering reducing calories even though I know its a bad idea for recomp progress but I'm letting the scale rule me.
I don't like how I let the scale rule me in general. On one hand it's good - even though I was using hair ties to extend the buttons on my pants instead of buying a bigger size - it wasn't until I saw 150 on the scale, which meant 25 BMI and officially over weight that I decided to do something about it. It's also great because I don't have to track food, make sure I stay in my 5 pound range and all's well. But then I have days like today and want to throw a giant pity party because the scale says a number I don't like which is actually not a real problem and I need to suck it up.
Pity party over. Sorry it's a lame pity party.
It's not lame at all. I admit the scale rules my life too...not that I want to..but it does. It can ruin my day...even when I know it's just water weight from the day before.
LOL I used to be like that and I still weigh a few times a week but now if it's < then I am YAAAY! If it's > then I am like WHATEVER *flips bird* Haha.
Ha ha I have on many occasions sworn at my scales. mostly the B word (Both B words) and once the C word when I was really angry.
It took me a long time, cuz I could only think of one B word. Then I remembered, you're across the pond and have a second B word that is not at all a cuss word in the States. More coffee needed this morning.0 -
TigerNY128 wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »kellienw335 wrote: »@pofoster21 - Love the shoes, although not sure how you walk in those! I can't wait until I drop some more weight so I can wear cute shoes again. I wear tennis shoes to work at the moment. It helps me to get in more steps. Also, we have a program that awards leave time every quarter if you get a certain number of minutes of exercise every month. Totally worth it!
Platforms. I keep telling you ladies this. Seriously. Try them.
Agreed...I hate wearing heels, but I can wear wedges all day long!
Ooh, I have a pair I need to share. Maybe I'll fashion show my shoes on the Batcave thread after I get back from vacay.0 -
pofoster21 wrote: »I would refuse to eat certain foods as a kid. My father would not allow me to leave the table. After 2 or 3 hours my mother would come in and BEG me to eat. Nope. No way. To this day I won't eat the exact same foods.
So, what are the foods that you won't eat? As kids we had to eat a couple bites of everything, I now do the same thing to my kids. I think it made me more willing to try new foods. The only foods, that I can think of right now, that I won't eat are cooked carrots (unless they are mixed in something like vegetable soup), lima beans, and brussel sprouts. I'm also not a huge fan of melon, in general, but I'll eat it if I have to.0 -
kellienw335 wrote: »rungirl1973 wrote: »My 20 year old boy got his "proposed treatment plan" from the dentist. I don't think there's a tooth that doesn't need something. We're talking about $15k worth of dental work. I don't have any words. I want to throttle him.
Wow! I was sharing with my 7 year old that I knew some people with kids who didn't brush their teeth when they were his age and now their teeth are ruined. He was mortified and brushed extra well last night and this morning!
That's pretty awesome! Our thread is making positive changes for generations to come!0
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