married chit-chatters?

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  • cross2bear
    cross2bear Posts: 1,106 Member
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    DarleneReid577 wrote: »
    Ok I have a new topic. I was born and raised in Ontario. We were married 28 years ago both gainfully employed. Two years ago my husband was offered a really good job in Alberta so he relocated. He finally talked me into early retirement and selling our family home to move and look after him. So I have been here a couple of months now and it starts. Well you aren't working so you should be able to ....etc etc etc. Or I need you to do etc etc etc.....well your not working. And when he is home ( he works 14 away 7 home) I feel like a slave, cooking all the meals, doing his laundry , etc etc ( we used to share chores, I cook he does dishes). I am starting to wish I stayed in Ontario. Any suggestions anyone???? :'(

    Hmmmmm....do you want to go back to working outside the home? Maybe he thinks the home is now your job, as it is to look after him (My eyes got really big when I read that in your original post). If thats not what you want, ya better tell him now!! Hugs from Ontario (where I work outside of the home and hubby is retired and does SFA.)
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    Lonestar5715 wrote: »
    nahmm83 wrote: »
    How many of you like to watch what your spouse watches on TV or vice versa? Currently watching Roadkill (automotive adventure, project cars, hot rods).....and I thoroughly enjoy it!

    I will watch some of what my significant other watches but I can and have lived for long periods without a television. I realized in my early 20's that television can be addictive to me and enables me to procrastinate so I am better off keeping it tightly controlled or abstaining entirely. I totally enjoy attending movies but limit them too because of the cost.

    My husband can get this way also with tv shows and Netflix. He sometimes ends up staying up binge watching stuff. He likes Sci Fi. And then he is tired or didn't do the work he wanted to do. But, it's not too bad. He still gets his work done and is very available to us as a husband and father. I just don't seem to like watching stuff at home very much. I can't seem to get into it. I get distracted from the tv by other things to do. But, recently I have gotten into movies more. Going out to the movies makes it so I sit and watch it and can't get distracted away by other things. And if I watch a movie at home at least I know it's a one time thing and won't be shows and shows and shows to keep up with. Recently I started watching a show called The Social. It's a Canadian daytime show with women my age talking about stuff. I can play that while I do stuff. I am home with my kids during the summer. They say I play the show, but don't watch it. And then the Dr. Phil show comes on and they say, "Mom that show you said is bad is on the tv now!" Lol. I don't want them watching that show. It's so much crazy stuff.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
    projectsix wrote: »
    I'm trying really hard to want to participate in this thread but all you married people write book-sized posts! Do you guys have time to write such lengthily posts just due to the lack of sex from being married?
    Why would you write this if you didn't badly have the itch to want to offend?

    When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.
  • Lonestar5715
    Lonestar5715 Posts: 466 Member
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    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    Lonestar5715 wrote: »
    nahmm83 wrote: »
    How many of you like to watch what your spouse watches on TV or vice versa? Currently watching Roadkill (automotive adventure, project cars, hot rods).....and I thoroughly enjoy it!

    And then the Dr. Phil show comes on and they say, "Mom that show you said is bad is on the tv now!" Lol. I don't want them watching that show. It's so much crazy stuff.

    This is a large part of why I can live without television, the content. So much of the programming has no appeal to me whatsoever. There is certainly some educational material and interesting do-it-yourself programs but overall I find too much simply provides an excuse to park my mind and sit idle which negates my health goals. lol It's good you can listen and do other things when there is a show you want to catch. Smart thinking!
  • 2011rocket3touring
    2011rocket3touring Posts: 1,346 Member
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    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    ...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.
    Personally I think it's just humor. If it's something you cannot relate to in your marriage than you are very blessed.
  • DarleneReid577
    DarleneReid577 Posts: 4,401 Member
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    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    :D
    2011rocket3touring wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    ...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.
    Personally I think it's just humor. If it's something you cannot relate to in your marriage than you are very blessed.

    Thanks. No, I don't relate at all. I don't understand the negativity I encounter about marriage. I am in an online women's group. Some people are so negative it's like they assume that if you are happy that probably you are in denial that your husband is having an affair with a younger women or that you are lying because married sex must be boring. I don't enjoy the negativity. I want to be able to make friends and participate in conversations with my experience also being respected. But, people that know us know what we have is real. And new people that we meet think we are newly weds. We have been together 18 years. I feel at this point people should be able to accept that it's lasting and we are a good judge on that for ourselves. Yes, I have a happy marriage and sex life. And I like to make friends and chat. I like to have fun. I guess it's kind of like people that think all parents hate being parents because it destroyed their body and life. I completely understand that some people don't want to have children. I don't understand thinking that everyone hates being a parent. I just don't understand the negativity that people want to project onto other people's lives. Sorry for my venting. I like to talk with all different people with all different experiences and relate on the things we relate about and hear different experiences. The human experience is diverse and interesting. I like that better without statements of assumed negativity. Just my preference. Everyone has challenges in life to deal with. I like being supportive hearing each others challenges and also allowing that there are positive things as well. I have challenges and sorrows in my life too. But, my marriage is my safe haven from that. And I worked hard in my life to work through difficult things and be a healthy person in my life and marriage, etc. I was able to write this book right now because my husband and kids are out swimming and I chose not to go this time. That's why we aren't having 24 hours of nonstop sex. Lol!

    Well there a book....blah blah blah... crazy lady. No wonder he thinks we never have sex. Jeez...
  • serenityfrye
    serenityfrye Posts: 360 Member
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    RavenLibra wrote: »
    I watch a lot of DIY, and things like American pickers Antiques road show etc... while the wife binge watches show's geared for her demographic... and we binge watch Netflix together once in a while currently "catching up" with The 100.

    Canada has a whole season of The 100 that isn't on American netflix yet. We are getting super impatient :(
  • RunRachelleRun
    RunRachelleRun Posts: 1,854 Member
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    serenityfrye wrote: »
    RavenLibra wrote: »
    I watch a lot of DIY, and things like American pickers Antiques road show etc... while the wife binge watches show's geared for her demographic... and we binge watch Netflix together once in a while currently "catching up" with The 100.

    Canada has a whole season of The 100 that isn't on American netflix yet. We are getting super impatient :(

    That's amazing. Millions of Canadians are trying to figure out ways to get American Netflix and they keep trying to block us. Nice to know we have something special :)
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    edited July 2016
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    DarleneReid577 wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    :D
    2011rocket3touring wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    ...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.
    Personally I think it's just humor. If it's something you cannot relate to in your marriage than you are very blessed.

    Thanks. No, I don't relate at all. I don't understand the negativity I encounter about marriage. I am in an online women's group. Some people are so negative it's like they assume that if you are happy that probably you are in denial that your husband is having an affair with a younger women or that you are lying because married sex must be boring. I don't enjoy the negativity. I want to be able to make friends and participate in conversations with my experience also being respected. But, people that know us know what we have is real. And new people that we meet think we are newly weds. We have been together 18 years. I feel at this point people should be able to accept that it's lasting and we are a good judge on that for ourselves. Yes, I have a happy marriage and sex life. And I like to make friends and chat. I like to have fun. I guess it's kind of like people that think all parents hate being parents because it destroyed their body and life. I completely understand that some people don't want to have children. I don't understand thinking that everyone hates being a parent. I just don't understand the negativity that people want to project onto other people's lives. Sorry for my venting. I like to talk with all different people with all different experiences and relate on the things we relate about and hear different experiences. The human experience is diverse and interesting. I like that better without statements of assumed negativity. Just my preference. Everyone has challenges in life to deal with. I like being supportive hearing each others challenges and also allowing that there are positive things as well. I have challenges and sorrows in my life too. But, my marriage is my safe haven from that. And I worked hard in my life to work through difficult things and be a healthy person in my life and marriage, etc. I was able to write this book right now because my husband and kids are out swimming and I chose not to go this time. That's why we aren't having 24 hours of nonstop sex. Lol!

    Well there a book....blah blah blah... crazy lady. No wonder he thinks we never have sex. Jeez...

    I am sorry if my post was offensive or upsetting to you or anyone else. That wasn't my intention. I probably shouldn't have vented because it's not a big deal (and I certainly don't want it to become a big problem here)

    I still don't understand what that has to do with sex (or how me posting a long post reflects on your sex life)...
  • NewMrsCarlson
    NewMrsCarlson Posts: 24 Member
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    Married chickadee right here :)
  • Lonestar5715
    Lonestar5715 Posts: 466 Member
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    NewMrsCarlson wrote: »
    Married chickadee right here :)

    Welcome @NewMrsCarlson it's always good to have new people on this thread.
  • RainaProske
    RainaProske Posts: 636 Member
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    projectsix wrote: »
    I'm trying really hard to want to participate in this thread but all you married people write book-sized posts! Do you guys have time to write such lengthily posts just due to the lack of sex from being married?

    I thought he was being funny; thus, my response. I see nothing offensive in his post.

    I don't know. Maybe I'm just naïve. Or maybe it's something else. However, I know that I often get off on some long-winded tangent, writing a few paragraphs. . . .
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    edited July 2016
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    RainaProske wrote: »
    projectsix wrote: »
    I'm trying really hard to want to participate in this thread but all you married people write book-sized posts! Do you guys have time to write such lengthily posts just due to the lack of sex from being married?

    I thought he was being funny; thus, my response. I see nothing offensive in his post.

    I don't know. Maybe I'm just naïve. Or maybe it's something else. However, I know that I often get off on some long-winded tangent, writing a few paragraphs. . . .

    Yes, I definitely do also go on long winded tangents sometimes (as you know). And tone doesn't always convey online from either direction. All is well (or at least I think it is).
  • RainaProske
    RainaProske Posts: 636 Member
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    BinaryPulsar wrote: »

    Yes, I definitely do also go on long winded tangents sometimes (as you know). And tone doesn't always convey online from either direction. All is well.

    I never noticed your writing long posts. Probably because I always enjoy reading what you write.
  • RainaProske
    RainaProske Posts: 636 Member
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    NewMrsCarlson wrote: »
    Married chickadee right here :)

    How long have you been married now, Chickadee? :smile:

    Ah, I remember well the first days! :)
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    RainaProske wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »

    Yes, I definitely do also go on long winded tangents sometimes (as you know). And tone doesn't always convey online from either direction. All is well.

    I never noticed your writing long posts. Probably because I always enjoy reading what you write.

    Thanks! I enjoy what you write also. I appreciate everyone sharing, even when I don't respond directly to posts.
  • DarleneReid577
    DarleneReid577 Posts: 4,401 Member
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    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    DarleneReid577 wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    :D
    2011rocket3touring wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    ...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.
    Personally I think it's just humor. If it's something you cannot relate to in your marriage than you are very blessed.

    Thanks. No, I don't relate at all. I don't understand the negativity I encounter about marriage. I am in an online women's group. Some people are so negative it's like they assume that if you are happy that probably you are in denial that your husband is having an affair with a younger women or that you are lying because married sex must be boring. I don't enjoy the negativity. I want to be able to make friends and participate in conversations with my experience also being respected. But, people that know us know what we have is real. And new people that we meet think we are newly weds. We have been together 18 years. I feel at this point people should be able to accept that it's lasting and we are a good judge on that for ourselves. Yes, I have a happy marriage and sex life. And I like to make friends and chat. I like to have fun. I guess it's kind of like people that think all parents hate being parents because it destroyed their body and life. I completely understand that some people don't want to have children. I don't understand thinking that everyone hates being a parent. I just don't understand the negativity that people want to project onto other people's lives. Sorry for my venting. I like to talk with all different people with all different experiences and relate on the things we relate about and hear different experiences. The human experience is diverse and interesting. I like that better without statements of assumed negativity. Just my preference. Everyone has challenges in life to deal with. I like being supportive hearing each others challenges and also allowing that there are positive things as well. I have challenges and sorrows in my life too. But, my marriage is my safe haven from that. And I worked hard in my life to work through difficult things and be a healthy person in my life and marriage, etc. I was able to write this book right now because my husband and kids are out swimming and I chose not to go this time. That's why we aren't having 24 hours of nonstop sex. Lol!

    Well there a book....blah blah blah... crazy lady. No wonder he thinks we never have sex. Jeez...

    I am sorry if my post was offensive or upsetting to you or anyone else. That wasn't my intention. I probably shouldn't have vented because it's not a big deal (and I certainly don't want it to become a big problem here)

    I still don't understand what that has to do with sex (or how me posting a long post reflects on your sex life)...

    Sorry it was suppose to be humorous. ..I was tickling your funny bone.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    DarleneReid577 wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    DarleneReid577 wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    :D
    2011rocket3touring wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    ...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.
    Personally I think it's just humor. If it's something you cannot relate to in your marriage than you are very blessed.

    Thanks. No, I don't relate at all. I don't understand the negativity I encounter about marriage. I am in an online women's group. Some people are so negative it's like they assume that if you are happy that probably you are in denial that your husband is having an affair with a younger women or that you are lying because married sex must be boring. I don't enjoy the negativity. I want to be able to make friends and participate in conversations with my experience also being respected. But, people that know us know what we have is real. And new people that we meet think we are newly weds. We have been together 18 years. I feel at this point people should be able to accept that it's lasting and we are a good judge on that for ourselves. Yes, I have a happy marriage and sex life. And I like to make friends and chat. I like to have fun. I guess it's kind of like people that think all parents hate being parents because it destroyed their body and life. I completely understand that some people don't want to have children. I don't understand thinking that everyone hates being a parent. I just don't understand the negativity that people want to project onto other people's lives. Sorry for my venting. I like to talk with all different people with all different experiences and relate on the things we relate about and hear different experiences. The human experience is diverse and interesting. I like that better without statements of assumed negativity. Just my preference. Everyone has challenges in life to deal with. I like being supportive hearing each others challenges and also allowing that there are positive things as well. I have challenges and sorrows in my life too. But, my marriage is my safe haven from that. And I worked hard in my life to work through difficult things and be a healthy person in my life and marriage, etc. I was able to write this book right now because my husband and kids are out swimming and I chose not to go this time. That's why we aren't having 24 hours of nonstop sex. Lol!

    Well there a book....blah blah blah... crazy lady. No wonder he thinks we never have sex. Jeez...

    I am sorry if my post was offensive or upsetting to you or anyone else. That wasn't my intention. I probably shouldn't have vented because it's not a big deal (and I certainly don't want it to become a big problem here)

    I still don't understand what that has to do with sex (or how me posting a long post reflects on your sex life)...

    Sorry it was suppose to be humorous. ..I was tickling your funny bone.

    Oh. Haha! I really do like humor. I even do movement comedy. But, I think I am sometimes bad at hearing tone online. I am more used to facial expression and body intonation and stuff.
  • Lonestar5715
    Lonestar5715 Posts: 466 Member
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    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    DarleneReid577 wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    DarleneReid577 wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    :D
    2011rocket3touring wrote: »
    BinaryPulsar wrote: »
    ...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.
    Personally I think it's just humor. If it's something you cannot relate to in your marriage than you are very blessed.

    Thanks. No, I don't relate at all. I don't understand the negativity I encounter about marriage. I am in an online women's group. Some people are so negative it's like they assume that if you are happy that probably you are in denial that your husband is having an affair with a younger women or that you are lying because married sex must be boring. I don't enjoy the negativity. I want to be able to make friends and participate in conversations with my experience also being respected. But, people that know us know what we have is real. And new people that we meet think we are newly weds. We have been together 18 years. I feel at this point people should be able to accept that it's lasting and we are a good judge on that for ourselves. Yes, I have a happy marriage and sex life. And I like to make friends and chat. I like to have fun. I guess it's kind of like people that think all parents hate being parents because it destroyed their body and life. I completely understand that some people don't want to have children. I don't understand thinking that everyone hates being a parent. I just don't understand the negativity that people want to project onto other people's lives. Sorry for my venting. I like to talk with all different people with all different experiences and relate on the things we relate about and hear different experiences. The human experience is diverse and interesting. I like that better without statements of assumed negativity. Just my preference. Everyone has challenges in life to deal with. I like being supportive hearing each others challenges and also allowing that there are positive things as well. I have challenges and sorrows in my life too. But, my marriage is my safe haven from that. And I worked hard in my life to work through difficult things and be a healthy person in my life and marriage, etc. I was able to write this book right now because my husband and kids are out swimming and I chose not to go this time. That's why we aren't having 24 hours of nonstop sex. Lol!

    Well there a book....blah blah blah... crazy lady. No wonder he thinks we never have sex. Jeez...

    I am sorry if my post was offensive or upsetting to you or anyone else. That wasn't my intention. I probably shouldn't have vented because it's not a big deal (and I certainly don't want it to become a big problem here)

    I still don't understand what that has to do with sex (or how me posting a long post reflects on your sex life)...

    Sorry it was suppose to be humorous. ..I was tickling your funny bone.

    But, I think I am sometimes bad at hearing tone online. I am more used to facial expression and body intonation and stuff.

    I have read that body language is up to 55% of our communication. Honestly, some of the worst relational spats I have had began as texts that were interpreted incorrectly. I now take extra time trying to be as clear as possible when texting to avoid as much confusion as possible.

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