married chit-chatters?
Replies
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Lonestar5715 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »DarleneReid577 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »DarleneReid577 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »2011rocket3touring wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.
Thanks. No, I don't relate at all. I don't understand the negativity I encounter about marriage. I am in an online women's group. Some people are so negative it's like they assume that if you are happy that probably you are in denial that your husband is having an affair with a younger women or that you are lying because married sex must be boring. I don't enjoy the negativity. I want to be able to make friends and participate in conversations with my experience also being respected. But, people that know us know what we have is real. And new people that we meet think we are newly weds. We have been together 18 years. I feel at this point people should be able to accept that it's lasting and we are a good judge on that for ourselves. Yes, I have a happy marriage and sex life. And I like to make friends and chat. I like to have fun. I guess it's kind of like people that think all parents hate being parents because it destroyed their body and life. I completely understand that some people don't want to have children. I don't understand thinking that everyone hates being a parent. I just don't understand the negativity that people want to project onto other people's lives. Sorry for my venting. I like to talk with all different people with all different experiences and relate on the things we relate about and hear different experiences. The human experience is diverse and interesting. I like that better without statements of assumed negativity. Just my preference. Everyone has challenges in life to deal with. I like being supportive hearing each others challenges and also allowing that there are positive things as well. I have challenges and sorrows in my life too. But, my marriage is my safe haven from that. And I worked hard in my life to work through difficult things and be a healthy person in my life and marriage, etc. I was able to write this book right now because my husband and kids are out swimming and I chose not to go this time. That's why we aren't having 24 hours of nonstop sex. Lol!
Well there a book....blah blah blah... crazy lady. No wonder he thinks we never have sex. Jeez...
I am sorry if my post was offensive or upsetting to you or anyone else. That wasn't my intention. I probably shouldn't have vented because it's not a big deal (and I certainly don't want it to become a big problem here)
I still don't understand what that has to do with sex (or how me posting a long post reflects on your sex life)...
Sorry it was suppose to be humorous. ..I was tickling your funny bone.
But, I think I am sometimes bad at hearing tone online. I am more used to facial expression and body intonation and stuff.
I have read that body language is up to 55% of our communication. Honestly, some of the worst relational spats I have had began as texts that were interpreted incorrectly. I now take extra time trying to be as clear as possible when texting to avoid as much confusion as possible.
I actually used to even feel anxiety about phone conversations because I am so physical and body language oriented. In social situations I am much more comfortable if there is dancing than if it's just standing around and talking. But, in real life I make people laugh because I can convey characters especially with movement and facial expression. I can tell a story without even speaking.1 -
BinaryPulsar wrote: »Lonestar5715 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »DarleneReid577 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »DarleneReid577 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »2011rocket3touring wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.
Thanks. No, I don't relate at all. I don't understand the negativity I encounter about marriage. I am in an online women's group. Some people are so negative it's like they assume that if you are happy that probably you are in denial that your husband is having an affair with a younger women or that you are lying because married sex must be boring. I don't enjoy the negativity. I want to be able to make friends and participate in conversations with my experience also being respected. But, people that know us know what we have is real. And new people that we meet think we are newly weds. We have been together 18 years. I feel at this point people should be able to accept that it's lasting and we are a good judge on that for ourselves. Yes, I have a happy marriage and sex life. And I like to make friends and chat. I like to have fun. I guess it's kind of like people that think all parents hate being parents because it destroyed their body and life. I completely understand that some people don't want to have children. I don't understand thinking that everyone hates being a parent. I just don't understand the negativity that people want to project onto other people's lives. Sorry for my venting. I like to talk with all different people with all different experiences and relate on the things we relate about and hear different experiences. The human experience is diverse and interesting. I like that better without statements of assumed negativity. Just my preference. Everyone has challenges in life to deal with. I like being supportive hearing each others challenges and also allowing that there are positive things as well. I have challenges and sorrows in my life too. But, my marriage is my safe haven from that. And I worked hard in my life to work through difficult things and be a healthy person in my life and marriage, etc. I was able to write this book right now because my husband and kids are out swimming and I chose not to go this time. That's why we aren't having 24 hours of nonstop sex. Lol!
Well there a book....blah blah blah... crazy lady. No wonder he thinks we never have sex. Jeez...
I am sorry if my post was offensive or upsetting to you or anyone else. That wasn't my intention. I probably shouldn't have vented because it's not a big deal (and I certainly don't want it to become a big problem here)
I still don't understand what that has to do with sex (or how me posting a long post reflects on your sex life)...
Sorry it was suppose to be humorous. ..I was tickling your funny bone.
But, I think I am sometimes bad at hearing tone online. I am more used to facial expression and body intonation and stuff.
I have read that body language is up to 55% of our communication. Honestly, some of the worst relational spats I have had began as texts that were interpreted incorrectly. I now take extra time trying to be as clear as possible when texting to avoid as much confusion as possible.
I actually used to even feel anxiety about phone conversations because I am so physical and body language oriented. In social situations I am much more comfortable if there is dancing than if it's just standing around and talking. But, in real life I make people laugh because I can convey characters especially with movement and facial expression. I can tell a story without even speaking.
I bet you would excel as a mime. As you said tone of voice is crucial. Just minutes after my daughter was born I was near the table where she was being cleaned and in spite of her screaming at the top of her lungs, the moment I spoke to her, she quieted instantly. The attending nurse said that reaction is something they observe frequently due to the child having recognized a voice they have only heard previously through the womb and in which they find comfort. I was floored!2 -
Lonestar5715 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »Lonestar5715 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »DarleneReid577 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »DarleneReid577 wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »2011rocket3touring wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.
Thanks. No, I don't relate at all. I don't understand the negativity I encounter about marriage. I am in an online women's group. Some people are so negative it's like they assume that if you are happy that probably you are in denial that your husband is having an affair with a younger women or that you are lying because married sex must be boring. I don't enjoy the negativity. I want to be able to make friends and participate in conversations with my experience also being respected. But, people that know us know what we have is real. And new people that we meet think we are newly weds. We have been together 18 years. I feel at this point people should be able to accept that it's lasting and we are a good judge on that for ourselves. Yes, I have a happy marriage and sex life. And I like to make friends and chat. I like to have fun. I guess it's kind of like people that think all parents hate being parents because it destroyed their body and life. I completely understand that some people don't want to have children. I don't understand thinking that everyone hates being a parent. I just don't understand the negativity that people want to project onto other people's lives. Sorry for my venting. I like to talk with all different people with all different experiences and relate on the things we relate about and hear different experiences. The human experience is diverse and interesting. I like that better without statements of assumed negativity. Just my preference. Everyone has challenges in life to deal with. I like being supportive hearing each others challenges and also allowing that there are positive things as well. I have challenges and sorrows in my life too. But, my marriage is my safe haven from that. And I worked hard in my life to work through difficult things and be a healthy person in my life and marriage, etc. I was able to write this book right now because my husband and kids are out swimming and I chose not to go this time. That's why we aren't having 24 hours of nonstop sex. Lol!
Well there a book....blah blah blah... crazy lady. No wonder he thinks we never have sex. Jeez...
I am sorry if my post was offensive or upsetting to you or anyone else. That wasn't my intention. I probably shouldn't have vented because it's not a big deal (and I certainly don't want it to become a big problem here)
I still don't understand what that has to do with sex (or how me posting a long post reflects on your sex life)...
Sorry it was suppose to be humorous. ..I was tickling your funny bone.
But, I think I am sometimes bad at hearing tone online. I am more used to facial expression and body intonation and stuff.
I have read that body language is up to 55% of our communication. Honestly, some of the worst relational spats I have had began as texts that were interpreted incorrectly. I now take extra time trying to be as clear as possible when texting to avoid as much confusion as possible.
I actually used to even feel anxiety about phone conversations because I am so physical and body language oriented. In social situations I am much more comfortable if there is dancing than if it's just standing around and talking. But, in real life I make people laugh because I can convey characters especially with movement and facial expression. I can tell a story without even speaking.
I bet you would excel as a mime. As you said tone of voice is crucial. Just minutes after my daughter was born I was near the table where she was being cleaned and in spite of her screaming at the top of her lungs, the moment I spoke to her, she quieted instantly. The attending nurse said that reaction is something they observe frequently due to the child having recognized a voice they have only heard previously through the womb and in which they find comfort. I was floored!
I love newborn baby stories!0 -
I agree a lot of times my sarcasm is totally missed. I am one really sarcastic person, with very dry humour and a lot of time my finger doesn't project that.3
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DarleneReid577 wrote: »I agree a lot of times my sarcasm is totally missed. I am one really sarcastic person, with very dry humour and a lot of time my finger doesn't project that.
Well, now that I think about it. I should have realized because I had noticed that about you previously.0 -
BinaryPulsar wrote: »DarleneReid577 wrote: »I agree a lot of times my sarcasm is totally missed. I am one really sarcastic person, with very dry humour and a lot of time my finger doesn't project that.
Well, now that I think about it. I should have realized because I had noticed that about you previously.
No *kitten*. ...jeez people1 -
Okay I have a 5 year old beagle. At the house we just moved into there were mushrooms growing in the yard. Who knew they are poison to dogs . My baby was so sick he was dragging his paws, now I have always been one of these people who scuffed at people who spent outrages amount of money at vets for their pets but $850.00 I have my baby back home alive and well. But I am following him around the yard to make sure he doesn't eat anymore bad stuff. Now I have to say my daughter is 27 and was gone from home when we got this pup, so he really became my baby.2
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I'm married, been for four years. Definitely had our ups and downs... It's been rough.
Buuuuuut anyway, what's up?0 -
Good Morning Everyone.
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Late to the party as usual, but on September 11th I will have been married for 20 years and on the same day it will be my eldest daughters 18th birthday. That will be a day of much partying!5
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awomaninsane wrote: »Late to the party as usual, but on September 11th I will have been married for 20 years and on the same day it will be my eldest daughters 18th birthday. That will be a day of much partying!
me too...better late than never.1 -
How long have you been married?
31 years for me1 -
16 years.0
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Not only that, but I'm locked in the car. I've got a double-whammy: I'm married, absolutely NOT looking; and OLD (although still have kept a shred of badazz, at least for an Old Phart). 16 grandkids old. So you youngsters just go ahead and have fun. Take care of yourselves and your families and friends. Karma is a beotch - in the blink of an eye you will be old like me, too. At least have no regrets.0 -
Hey guys! Can I join up here?4
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gigglingsoul wrote: »Hey guys! Can I join up here?
We welcome all. Glad to have you.1 -
Welcome to the dark side.2
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JenniferSchaffer1 wrote: »What do you do with your kids that is cheap an easy to do crafts such as that?
Get them outside! Hike; grow a kid-sized vegetable garden; run through the sprinkler; catch fireflies; go to a lake. Buy a yard game like croquet or "*kitten*". Get them involved with organized sports. If you raise your kids to be active, they will raise THEIR kids to be active - and with any luck, none of them will ever need to be on this website for weight loss.....
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Lol glad to be here, thanks!
Let's see- married 4 years, 3 kids (nursing one still), here to lose another 20+lbs... Leftover kid weight. I started mfp when I was preggo with my now 16mo old, so the weight loss it shows isn't true weight loss, but I'll take it!2 -
all three kids under four? You're brave...You can lose the weight. Stick with it.0
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Lady_Spartan15 wrote: »Married 8 years this August. Almost at the weight I was when I first met my husband... Like the little engine that could, just keep saying "I think I can, I think I can"...
Don't give up. You're an inspiration to all moms! Go girl1 -
I didn't join mfp to lose weight. Just working on fitness. And tracking calories to make sure I eat enough. And maintaining my weight and fitness. Being healthy. Started weight lifting four years ago. Definitely became necessary to have a food diary three years into mfp because I developed a malabsorption disorder that I am dealing with now for the past year. Married 16 years (18 in relationship, 20 friendship). Two daughters: 9 & 12. Already said this probably a bunch of times, but saying Hello to the new people.2
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BinaryPulsar wrote: »I didn't join mfp to lose weight. Just working on fitness. And tracking calories to make sure I eat enough. And maintaining my weight and fitness. Being healthy. Started weight lifting four years ago. Definitely became necessary to have a food diary three years into mfp because I developed a malabsorption disorder that I am dealing with now for the past year. Married 16 years (18 in relationship, 20 friendship). Two daughters: 9 & 12. Already said this probably a bunch of times, but saying Hello to the new people.
Love the username BTW...It's inspiring to see you taking charge of your life, disorder, and showing everyone that you can be a rock start no matter what!! Keep it up.1 -
nukephysics wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »I didn't join mfp to lose weight. Just working on fitness. And tracking calories to make sure I eat enough. And maintaining my weight and fitness. Being healthy. Started weight lifting four years ago. Definitely became necessary to have a food diary three years into mfp because I developed a malabsorption disorder that I am dealing with now for the past year. Married 16 years (18 in relationship, 20 friendship). Two daughters: 9 & 12. Already said this probably a bunch of times, but saying Hello to the new people.
Love the username BTW...It's inspiring to see you taking charge of your life, disorder, and showing everyone that you can be a rock start no matter what!! Keep it up.
Thanks! Oh are you a physicist? My husband is physicist.0 -
BinaryPulsar wrote: »nukephysics wrote: »BinaryPulsar wrote: »I didn't join mfp to lose weight. Just working on fitness. And tracking calories to make sure I eat enough. And maintaining my weight and fitness. Being healthy. Started weight lifting four years ago. Definitely became necessary to have a food diary three years into mfp because I developed a malabsorption disorder that I am dealing with now for the past year. Married 16 years (18 in relationship, 20 friendship). Two daughters: 9 & 12. Already said this probably a bunch of times, but saying Hello to the new people.
Love the username BTW...It's inspiring to see you taking charge of your life, disorder, and showing everyone that you can be a rock start no matter what!! Keep it up.
Thanks! Oh are you a physicist? My husband is physicist.
Yes. You married a good man then.2 -
Not only that, but I'm locked in the car. I've got a double-whammy: I'm married, absolutely NOT looking; and OLD (although still have kept a shred of badazz, at least for an Old Phart). 16 grandkids old. So you youngsters just go ahead and have fun. Take care of yourselves and your families and friends. Karma is a beotch - in the blink of an eye you will be old like me, too. At least have no regrets.
Hey welcome @grannynot glad to have you here and the wisdom only the years can bring. It is so true that life happens while we are making other plans but you sound like you roll with the punches. I love the number of grandkids you have. I hope they live near enough so you see them regularly.1 -
awomaninsane wrote: »Late to the party as usual, but on September 11th I will have been married for 20 years and on the same day it will be my eldest daughters 18th birthday. That will be a day of much partying!
Congrats on your upcoming 20th and your daughter's 18th @awomaninsane That's a clever username! Welcome to the place of the marrieds. This has been an interesting thread to me and one of the few on mfp I enjoy following. Glad to have you here!2 -
Lady_Spartan15 wrote: »Married 8 years this August. Almost at the weight I was when I first met my husband... Like the little engine that could, just keep saying "I think I can, I think I can"...
You definitely can @Lady_Spartan15 I lost my weight (30 lbs.) when I was 55 so keep on logging and we'll be here to cheer you on!1
This discussion has been closed.
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