married chit-chatters?

Lonestar5715 wrote: »

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BinaryPulsar wrote: »

DarleneReid577 wrote: »

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

DarleneReid577 wrote: »

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

2011rocket3touring wrote: »

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.

Personally I think it's just humor. If it's something you cannot relate to in your marriage than you are very blessed.

Thanks. No, I don't relate at all. I don't understand the negativity I encounter about marriage. I am in an online women's group. Some people are so negative it's like they assume that if you are happy that probably you are in denial that your husband is having an affair with a younger women or that you are lying because married sex must be boring. I don't enjoy the negativity. I want to be able to make friends and participate in conversations with my experience also being respected. But, people that know us know what we have is real. And new people that we meet think we are newly weds. We have been together 18 years. I feel at this point people should be able to accept that it's lasting and we are a good judge on that for ourselves. Yes, I have a happy marriage and sex life. And I like to make friends and chat. I like to have fun. I guess it's kind of like people that think all parents hate being parents because it destroyed their body and life. I completely understand that some people don't want to have children. I don't understand thinking that everyone hates being a parent. I just don't understand the negativity that people want to project onto other people's lives. Sorry for my venting. I like to talk with all different people with all different experiences and relate on the things we relate about and hear different experiences. The human experience is diverse and interesting. I like that better without statements of assumed negativity. Just my preference. Everyone has challenges in life to deal with. I like being supportive hearing each others challenges and also allowing that there are positive things as well. I have challenges and sorrows in my life too. But, my marriage is my safe haven from that. And I worked hard in my life to work through difficult things and be a healthy person in my life and marriage, etc. I was able to write this book right now because my husband and kids are out swimming and I chose not to go this time. That's why we aren't having 24 hours of nonstop sex. Lol!

Well there a book....blah blah blah... crazy lady. No wonder he thinks we never have sex. Jeez...

I am sorry if my post was offensive or upsetting to you or anyone else. That wasn't my intention. I probably shouldn't have vented because it's not a big deal (and I certainly don't want it to become a big problem here)

I still don't understand what that has to do with sex (or how me posting a long post reflects on your sex life)...

Sorry it was suppose to be humorous. ..I was tickling your funny bone.

But, I think I am sometimes bad at hearing tone online. I am more used to facial expression and body intonation and stuff.

I have read that body language is up to 55% of our communication. Honestly, some of the worst relational spats I have had began as texts that were interpreted incorrectly. I now take extra time trying to be as clear as possible when texting to avoid as much confusion as possible.

Lonestar5715 wrote: »

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BinaryPulsar wrote: »

Lonestar5715 wrote: »

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

DarleneReid577 wrote: »

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

DarleneReid577 wrote: »

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

2011rocket3touring wrote: »

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

...When people say negative stuff like that it's usually because they are projecting their own life troubles onto other people. That's what I have come to understand about people's negativity about marriage.

Personally I think it's just humor. If it's something you cannot relate to in your marriage than you are very blessed.

Thanks. No, I don't relate at all. I don't understand the negativity I encounter about marriage. I am in an online women's group. Some people are so negative it's like they assume that if you are happy that probably you are in denial that your husband is having an affair with a younger women or that you are lying because married sex must be boring. I don't enjoy the negativity. I want to be able to make friends and participate in conversations with my experience also being respected. But, people that know us know what we have is real. And new people that we meet think we are newly weds. We have been together 18 years. I feel at this point people should be able to accept that it's lasting and we are a good judge on that for ourselves. Yes, I have a happy marriage and sex life. And I like to make friends and chat. I like to have fun. I guess it's kind of like people that think all parents hate being parents because it destroyed their body and life. I completely understand that some people don't want to have children. I don't understand thinking that everyone hates being a parent. I just don't understand the negativity that people want to project onto other people's lives. Sorry for my venting. I like to talk with all different people with all different experiences and relate on the things we relate about and hear different experiences. The human experience is diverse and interesting. I like that better without statements of assumed negativity. Just my preference. Everyone has challenges in life to deal with. I like being supportive hearing each others challenges and also allowing that there are positive things as well. I have challenges and sorrows in my life too. But, my marriage is my safe haven from that. And I worked hard in my life to work through difficult things and be a healthy person in my life and marriage, etc. I was able to write this book right now because my husband and kids are out swimming and I chose not to go this time. That's why we aren't having 24 hours of nonstop sex. Lol!

Well there a book....blah blah blah... crazy lady. No wonder he thinks we never have sex. Jeez...

I am sorry if my post was offensive or upsetting to you or anyone else. That wasn't my intention. I probably shouldn't have vented because it's not a big deal (and I certainly don't want it to become a big problem here)

I still don't understand what that has to do with sex (or how me posting a long post reflects on your sex life)...

Sorry it was suppose to be humorous. ..I was tickling your funny bone.

But, I think I am sometimes bad at hearing tone online. I am more used to facial expression and body intonation and stuff.

I have read that body language is up to 55% of our communication. Honestly, some of the worst relational spats I have had began as texts that were interpreted incorrectly. I now take extra time trying to be as clear as possible when texting to avoid as much confusion as possible.

I actually used to even feel anxiety about phone conversations because I am so physical and body language oriented. In social situations I am much more comfortable if there is dancing than if it's just standing around and talking. But, in real life I make people laugh because I can convey characters especially with movement and facial expression. I can tell a story without even speaking.

I bet you would excel as a mime. As you said tone of voice is crucial. Just minutes after my daughter was born I was near the table where she was being cleaned and in spite of her screaming at the top of her lungs, the moment I spoke to her, she quieted instantly. The attending nurse said that reaction is something they observe frequently due to the child having recognized a voice they have only heard previously through the womb and in which they find comfort. I was floored!

DarleneReid577 wrote: »

I agree a lot of times my sarcasm is totally missed. I am one really sarcastic person, with very dry humour and a lot of time my finger doesn't project that.

awomaninsane wrote: »

Late to the party as usual, but on September 11th I will have been married for 20 years and on the same day it will be my eldest daughters 18th birthday. That will be a day of much partying!

Lady_Spartan15 wrote: »

Married 8 years this August. Almost at the weight I was when I first met my husband... Like the little engine that could, just keep saying "I think I can, I think I can"...

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

I didn't join mfp to lose weight. Just working on fitness. And tracking calories to make sure I eat enough. And maintaining my weight and fitness. Being healthy. Started weight lifting four years ago. Definitely became necessary to have a food diary three years into mfp because I developed a malabsorption disorder that I am dealing with now for the past year. Married 16 years (18 in relationship, 20 friendship). Two daughters: 9 & 12. Already said this probably a bunch of times, but saying Hello to the new people.

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

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nukephysics wrote: »

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

I didn't join mfp to lose weight. Just working on fitness. And tracking calories to make sure I eat enough. And maintaining my weight and fitness. Being healthy. Started weight lifting four years ago. Definitely became necessary to have a food diary three years into mfp because I developed a malabsorption disorder that I am dealing with now for the past year. Married 16 years (18 in relationship, 20 friendship). Two daughters: 9 & 12. Already said this probably a bunch of times, but saying Hello to the new people.

Love the username BTW...It's inspiring to see you taking charge of your life, disorder, and showing everyone that you can be a rock start no matter what!! Keep it up.

Thanks! Oh are you a physicist? My husband is physicist.

awomaninsane wrote: »

Late to the party as usual, but on September 11th I will have been married for 20 years and on the same day it will be my eldest daughters 18th birthday. That will be a day of much partying!