Weird gender attraction question

OMG so many terms I've never heard of!! Back in the day, you liked girls, you liked boys, or you liked both and didn't tell your parents. It's a new world, for sure!

Escloflowne wrote: »

I would just stick with dudes, OP. Women are so high maintenance and a few days a month it's a no go for sex.

It certainly doesn't have to be a no go for sex, there are plenty of options regardless of where either lady is in her menstrual cycle. Also, lesbian bed-death is a greatly exaggerated stereotype, (just like u-hauling) it certainly can happen but it has zero to do with attraction. No one questions a straight woman's sexuality when she is too tired or "not in the mood" to have sex with her husband, so why is that if gay women going through the same thing it's because they "don't stay physically attracted" to each other, or their relationship was a result of a "fantom symptom"??

Relationships take work, regardless of the gender. OP, you are the only one who gets to determine (and label) your sexuality. If you were to just reading through a list of sexualities, based only on what you've told us, demi-sexual may be the best fit. Whether you are attracted to no one, or everyone, it's 100% ok.

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

Wheelhouse15 wrote: »

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

Motorsheen wrote: »

Is it wrong to be attracted to a Green Chili Burrito?


.....I'm asking for a friend.

Objectum sexual

So fetishism has a new term?

No, it's not fetishism. It's a rare situation in which people do not have sexual attraction or romantic interest in people. They feel that they are in love with specific objects and the objects are also in love with them. I'm pretty sure it's classified as a mental illness (though they disagree). Everyone that has this condition has other disorders along with it such as a severe attachment disorder.

Interesting, I don't remember that from my Sexual Psych class but I guess it's probably been cleaved off from fetishism recently. I would doubt that it's considered a mental illness unless it's causing the person emotional distress. AFAIK almost all of the sexually related disorders were removed from such classifications unless they cause emotional distress because they were really just encoding morals into psychiatry e.g. homosexuality.

ETA just noticed I missed where you mentioned that there were associated personality disorders so it's probably a disorder by extension.

GnothiSeauton23 wrote: »

Escloflowne wrote: »

saragreen012 wrote: »

Escloflowne wrote: »

I would just stick with dudes, OP. Women are so high maintenance and a few days a month it's a no go for sex.

It certainly doesn't have to be a no go for sex, there are plenty of options regardless of where either lady is in her menstrual cycle. Also, lesbian bed-death is a greatly exaggerated stereotype, (just like u-hauling) it certainly can happen but it has zero to do with attraction. No one questions a straight woman's sexuality when she is too tired or "not in the mood" to have sex with her husband, so why is that if gay women going through the same thing it's because they "don't stay physically attracted" to each other, or their relationship was a result of a "fantom symptom"??

Relationships take work, regardless of the gender. OP, you are the only one who gets to determine (and label) your sexuality. If you were to just reading through a list of sexualities, based only on what you've told us, demi-sexual may be the best fit. Whether you are attracted to no one, or everyone, it's 100% ok.

Like scissoring? How do lesbians have sex on their periods!? For Science of course!

with fries

I wonder if there's research to back that up!

SquallGull wrote: »

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

Francl27 wrote: »

MeganMoroz89 wrote: »

You might feel like you fall into one of these categories:

Pansexual = You can be sexually attracted to any gender, whether or not it is within the male/female binary
Demisexual = You are only sexually attracted to certain people with whom you have an emotional connection

Is there something for 'almost never sexually attracted by anyone'? lol.

Yes, that's what demi-sexual is. Demi-sexual is not completely asexual. It's a person with a low sex drive that doesn't feel physically attracted to people based on physicality alone. They only sometimes want sex with a person they have formed an emotional connection with.

I think it might be worth a try to date women and see how it goes.

I'm bisexual. But, I have a high sex drive.

Your description of demi-sexual is more in line with Grey Asexual / Grey-A. Demisexuals do not necessarily have a low sex drive. Some demi-sexuals have a rather high sex drive. They just have sexual feelings for people they already have some kind of emotional connection with.

Oh interesting. I didn't know that. I always saw it described as low sex drive. That's why the word demi. I do agree the vast amount of labels now gets confusing. But, I do understand people wanting to be able to accurately seek compatible partners. Thanks for the info.

GnothiSeauton23 wrote: »

Escloflowne wrote: »

saragreen012 wrote: »

Escloflowne wrote: »

I would just stick with dudes, OP. Women are so high maintenance and a few days a month it's a no go for sex.

It certainly doesn't have to be a no go for sex, there are plenty of options regardless of where either lady is in her menstrual cycle. Also, lesbian bed-death is a greatly exaggerated stereotype, (just like u-hauling) it certainly can happen but it has zero to do with attraction. No one questions a straight woman's sexuality when she is too tired or "not in the mood" to have sex with her husband, so why is that if gay women going through the same thing it's because they "don't stay physically attracted" to each other, or their relationship was a result of a "fantom symptom"??

Relationships take work, regardless of the gender. OP, you are the only one who gets to determine (and label) your sexuality. If you were to just reading through a list of sexualities, based only on what you've told us, demi-sexual may be the best fit. Whether you are attracted to no one, or everyone, it's 100% ok.

Like scissoring? How do lesbians have sex on their periods!? For Science of course!

with fries

everything is better with fries....

saragreen012 wrote: »

OP, you are the only one who gets to determine (and label) your sexuality. If you were to just reading through a list of sexualities, based only on what you've told us, demi-sexual may be the best fit.

Orrrr, OP, you could just not label it and just go with it.

Why is our society so obsessed with labels? It seems very odd to me that we desire to stick labels on very complex parts of who we are (everyone must have a sexuality label, a religious label, a political ideology label....blah)

Labeling/categorizing EVERYTHING is very anti-queer imo

jenmar22 wrote: »

MeganMoroz89 wrote: »

You might feel like you fall into one of these categories:

Pansexual = You can be sexually attracted to any gender, whether or not it is within the male/female binary
Demisexual = You are only sexually attracted to certain people with whom you have an emotional connection

BinaryPulsar wrote: »

DeficitDuchess wrote: »

What's self attraction's label?

I am not conceited but my self esteem, won't allow me; to be loveless!

I don't know. Maybe auto-sexual. I might have just made that word up. But, I have found that if you search anything sexual that it probably has people talking about it or proclaiming a fetish for it.

This is more of a meta comment....

I hate the current LGBTQ-academic movement to stick a label on every feckin mode of sexuality out there

It also seems quite "anti-queer" as the point of queer theory has been to break the confines of societally imposed labels and recognize things like sexuality as self-determined and sometimes fluid/uncategorizable

Anyway, carry on....

I understand and agree to a degree. I understand that people are wanting to understand their sex drive because it leads to less conflict in relationship when people understand and are up front about that. It's not an issue for me personally. I think it's more of an issue for people with low sex drive or asexual.

I personally just identify as bisexual. Like I always have. I don't really understand why pansexual had to come into existence. I guess people didn't like the term bi meaning two. But, I feel like pansexual is just unnecessarily singling people out based on their gender orientation. But, whatever. I don't care. People can do what they want. I don't want to make an issue out of it.

I think some people go overboard with too many labels. But, again, whatever, they can do what they want.

I just studied sexuality and learn a lot about it and certain things just stick in my mind.

Sexuality is definitely fluid and on a spectrum.

saragreen012 wrote: »

Escloflowne wrote: »

saragreen012 wrote: »

Escloflowne wrote: »

I would just stick with dudes, OP. Women are so high maintenance and a few days a month it's a no go for sex.

It certainly doesn't have to be a no go for sex, there are plenty of options regardless of where either lady is in her menstrual cycle. Also, lesbian bed-death is a greatly exaggerated stereotype, (just like u-hauling) it certainly can happen but it has zero to do with attraction. No one questions a straight woman's sexuality when she is too tired or "not in the mood" to have sex with her husband, so why is that if gay women going through the same thing it's because they "don't stay physically attracted" to each other, or their relationship was a result of a "fantom symptom"??

Relationships take work, regardless of the gender. OP, you are the only one who gets to determine (and label) your sexuality. If you were to just reading through a list of sexualities, based only on what you've told us, demi-sexual may be the best fit. Whether you are attracted to no one, or everyone, it's 100% ok.

Like scissoring? How do lesbians have sex on their periods!? For Science of course!

lol lesbians have sex many different ways, and scissoring is almost never one of them. Some people do not mind the blood, some play in the shower, some people use something to block the flow, obviously there are more methods too but I'm not really sure how to discuss this without grossing some people out...

I'm disgusted but intrigued....