Non friendly females in the gym.

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  • Master_Butcher
    Master_Butcher Posts: 50 Member
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    Adc7225 wrote: »
    Wow, that question seemed to spark something in some . . . I have to agree that while most of us are trying to get in and out within a limited time frame I will still engage in conversation with those that stop and speak to me as I would hope one would do for me. While usually it is a few comments in passing I figure we are there for the same general reason and unless they start taking about moonbeams and unicorns I just try and keep it light and friendly :)

    Moonbeams? Lol. Out of curiousity, what even is that?
  • aelunyu
    aelunyu Posts: 486 Member
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    OP, I wouldn't worry about it. But for future purposes, I'd reconsider the titling of your threads. For one, referring to women as....well..."females" is sort of dehumanizing...too technical. Add to that the prefix of "non-friendly", and before any women reads your original post, they have already formed an opinion about you, regardless of your rather harmless intentions.

    I will say that it's sort of weird to note that mainly women are non-friendly, as I think the vast majority of the non-friendly vibe within gyms is male-generated. The truth is if a girl (whether she's working out or drinking coffee or drinking shots) has time for you, you'll know it, and then you'll be happy =)

    Also girls in the gym: don't kid yourselves. (you know who you are) haha
  • CJ_Holmes
    CJ_Holmes Posts: 759 Member
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    aelunyu wrote: »
    OP, I wouldn't worry about it. But for future purposes, I'd reconsider the titling of your threads. For one, referring to women as....well..."females" is sort of dehumanizing...too technical. Add to that the prefix of "non-friendly", and before any women reads your original post, they have already formed an opinion about you, regardless of your rather harmless intentions.

    I will say that it's sort of weird to note that mainly women are non-friendly, as I think the vast majority of the non-friendly vibe within gyms is male-generated. The truth is if a girl (whether she's working out or drinking coffee or drinking shots) has time for you, you'll know it, and then you'll be happy =)

    Also girls in the gym: don't kid yourselves. (you know who you are) haha

    I agree with this constructive feedback about OP's wording. I definitely formed an opinion as soon as I saw the title of the post.

    My advice: Don't take it personally. I have to talk to people all day at work, and if I am at the gym, I want "me" time. Also, I have had way too many experiences where I smile once or say "hi" and then am stuck with some new buddy who can't read the signals that no, I do not want to talk or work out together. I want to go to my pain cave alone and unencumbered. Now I mostly try to avoid eye contact.

    If you are looking for chats and friends, you'll connect with the other people there for the same reason. If no one is nice to you, maybe the gym is a bad fit for your personality. Try a bootcamp or running club maybe. If it happens everywhere, you might want to ask your friends for some honest feedback on what you're doing wrong.
  • canadianlbs
    canadianlbs Posts: 5,199 Member
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    lstrat115 wrote: »
    I don't see why that's bad, but to each their own I guess.

    maybe not 'bad', but i see it as kind of pointless, personally. not saying you need to stop doing it if it works for you, but just giving my own perspective. i don't mind being pleasant to people, most of the time. but the idea of having to make eye contact and smile at every single person i come across as i go through a day . . . it's exhausting. i'd feel scraped raw by around 11 am.
    lisciousg24 wrote: »
    I have noticed though many females where I go wear a *kitten* load of make up to the gym. So maybe they're not part of the unfriendly ones you're referring to.

    most of the women i've known who were makeup people, didn't mean they were hoping someone would hit on them; it's just a facet of who they are. they put it on before they go out in the same way that i comb my hair and change out of pyjamas. but nobody thinks i'm trying to attract attention by combing my hair.

    it's sort of strange to think that if i were a makeup user myself, i might suddenly find my workout being judged by bystanders as not serious enough or something. but the fact is, i don't think what i usually do in the gym would disturb any makeup if i happened to be wearing some. so why not, if that's how somebody always does life?

  • canadianlbs
    canadianlbs Posts: 5,199 Member
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    chocolate_owl wrote: »
    Because the first thing I think of is livestock of some kind.

    \o/ YOU i will smile at :D

    idk, i think people are afraid to say 'women' these days. there's something fingertippy and mincey about calling us 'females' that gets to me too. like being a woman is too raw and elemental to be called out by 'polite' people.

  • Dreamcrusher16
    Dreamcrusher16 Posts: 1,263 Member
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    happilymegan wrote: »
    zyxst wrote: »
    How do you feel about non-friendly males at the gym?

    I don't go to the gym to talk. Talking is done in other places, like a coffee house or bar or movie theatre.

    No talking should be done in a movie theatre. I throw popcorn at the back of those peoples heads.

    I want to sit in front of you and talk so that I get free popcorn.
  • KrystalAmbro
    KrystalAmbro Posts: 10 Member
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    I am a very friendly person but when it comes to working out that is my "me" time. I honestly don't want to be bothered when I'm working out. I am there to get stuff done and continue with my day, I am sure many of the ladies you are referring to are the same way.
  • blackcomaro
    blackcomaro Posts: 796 Member
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    Is this thread still going? It should be combined with "are me afraid to ask for a womens number". Be polite, short and sweet. The gym is for working out!
  • RachelElser
    RachelElser Posts: 1,049 Member
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    They are probably focused on their work out. When I went to the gym, I put in headphones and did my workout then left. Not to be mean but because I had limited time and didn't have time to chat.
  • Dreamcrusher16
    Dreamcrusher16 Posts: 1,263 Member
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    happilymegan wrote: »
    Dreamcrusher16 wrote: »
    happilymegan wrote: »
    zyxst wrote: »
    How do you feel about non-friendly males at the gym?

    I don't go to the gym to talk. Talking is done in other places, like a coffee house or bar or movie theatre.

    No talking should be done in a movie theatre. I throw popcorn at the back of those peoples heads.

    I want to sit in front of you and talk so that I get free popcorn.

    I'll make sure I lick it all first then :p

    ...because you think that would deter me somehow?
  • Dreamcrusher16
    Dreamcrusher16 Posts: 1,263 Member
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    happilymegan wrote: »
    Dreamcrusher16 wrote: »
    happilymegan wrote: »
    Dreamcrusher16 wrote: »
    happilymegan wrote: »
    zyxst wrote: »
    How do you feel about non-friendly males at the gym?

    I don't go to the gym to talk. Talking is done in other places, like a coffee house or bar or movie theatre.

    No talking should be done in a movie theatre. I throw popcorn at the back of those peoples heads.

    I want to sit in front of you and talk so that I get free popcorn.

    I'll make sure I lick it all first then :p

    ...because you think that would deter me somehow?

    Ooh you're nasty ;)

    You have no idea... how much I like popcorn
  • AdamAthletic
    AdamAthletic Posts: 2,985 Member
    edited January 2017
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    Male or female I think everybody has different degrees of comfort with talking to people at the gym..

    I mean, I'm a PT so.. when I'm training clients I'm constantly having to keep chatting and keep motivating them - keep up occasional small talk and then generally be a source of inspiration to push through barriers..

    That said, when I have my own sessions I love to be left alone - it's my time.
    It's not that I'm unfriendly I just use it as my get-away time.

    I think so many people are similar.

    Come talk to me in the steam room or jacuzzi but the gym, you can guarantee I'm wearing my earphones ignoring the world!!

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