What was your point of disgust?
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When I couldn't sit in a bathtub. I could not fit in a regular bathtub. I cried for about an hour. That was my breaking point, I was just so sick and tired of being sick and tired.3
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AlphaWolfMama wrote: »Was in a Dennys and ordered a veggie skillet. Overheard the server tell the cook that the "pig at table nine is asking for extra veggies, like it's doing her any good". Normally I wouldn't get upset, but something just snapped. Just tired of being reminded about my weight.
Wow. This is just so wrong. Being overweight doesn't give a server the right to be judgemental and rude. You should write Denny's. They need to remember to train the staff that the customers pay their salaries.
Good for you for deciding to lose weight, not eat your pain.
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Mine was just not having any clothes to go out in or wearing the ones i have confidently. I saw stretch marks forming on my lower stomach and that was it, no more sugar! Been a week and I'm sleeping and lasting through the day longer. I feel great with no sugar and only drinking water!3
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I went to my doctor for a referral to a dietician for my IBS and he told me I needed to be weighed for the sake of the referral. I was like, okay fine. I didn't weigh myself in general because I have a history of ED but I knew I was overweight, I wasn't blind, but seeing the number on the scale (220ish) was like being slapped in the face. But my doctor didn't say anything to me. Part of me thought: is it because I'm a lost cause? It wasn't, he just didn't want to put pressure on me but I did it for myself. I stopped pretending that my breathlessness was asthma or that all of my aches were down to my hypermobility. I just stopped pretending that because I felt fine with things that they were fine.
I started off with a dance exercise DVD in my kitchen, then 90 minutes of yoga and two kickboxing classes a week and now I train 5-7 hours a week kickboxing for belts/to compete. I'm also 80lbs down from that initial weigh in (over the course of two years). The part that made it all worth it was when I got appendicitis 6 weeks ago and I went into hospital, had it removed laprascopically and had zero complications (thus far). I had minimal decrease in my cardiac output when I went back to my first training session since my surgery (despite doing nothing but walking for 6 weeks ). I have the health I was striving for when I started.11 -
I received word that my blood sugar was now in the Diabetes Type 2 range. A co-worker, who is very overweight and has horrible eating habits told me "I heard you're one of us now--welcome to the Diabetes Club." That was a turning point for me. I knew I'd have to shape up eventually but that was really the breaking point.4
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Not really disgust, more frustration.
Episodes of gout, trouble breathing from large stomach pulling on diaphragm and a weak back.
What finally got me determined was throwing my back out with a sneeze (yes a sneeze), laying in bed and having a gout episode come on during the same time. Most miserable I have ever been and it lasted 4 days.5 -
No moment of disgust here. Just a moment of inspiration. Have been slowly gaining weight ever since my wife had kids. Stress eating, over-worked, depressed, numerous fad diets (including nutrisystem which I now know failed because it had me eating 1,200 calories a day when 2 pounds a week on MFP has me at 1,940... holy crap nutrisystem!?)
Anyway, I stumbled across a Youtuber named Vitruvian Physique and he talked about all of these fad diets just secretly tricking you into a calorie deficit. He recommended MFP to track and the rest is history. Down 26 pounds and I'm never hungry. I eat whatever I want and just watch the portions so cravings are never a problem. If I want to eat more I go hit the bike. Will work (out) for food!9 -
It has been a lot of things. First I gained 20 pounds in a year, had to buy new pants and tops. But recently I was wearing yoga pants and a tank top at a baseball game and I walked past a window and stopped at a dead stop and almost cried seeing the way I looked in yoga pants. Also Ive never had a muffin top. Now anyway I sit, its there and it wont go away. I refuse to be the lady that shouldn't be wearing a tank top and yoga pants. So now I'm changing. It should have started when the 20 pounds came on and the clothes shopping.1
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I had revamped my entire life. I had quit drinking and smoking for over two years, bought a house, started my own company, was taking fish oil and vitamin d supplements, changed my diet(no more fast food or chain restaurants) and cut off my long hair. Most of this was to attract a woman(any woman, no one specific) but also to better myself. A little insight, I was 5'8 195lbs, I have no picture up but people have compared me to universally accepted good looking guys like Brad Pitt, Shawn Michaels, and even recently to Chris Hemsworth. I think it was more when they and the long flowing hair like mine more than the face but the comparisons were made so I'm happy to accept it. I had a decent social life with friends but was always alone at night. Anyway, I was in a deep depression after making all these changes and still showing no results in the love department. So as I lay alone on my king size bed, only bought in the hopes of one day having a lady in it, I looked at my body and thought "this has to go". I never thought of myself as overweight - I "carried it well" or it was just a couple lbs so I'll be fine was the belief. So I started on MFP and Insanity in in less than 6 months I was down to 155lbs and I wasn't even giving it a full effort. Meaning I was still eating too many snacks and extra calories. I was also working out at least 2 hours a day. I could have easily added an hour and cut out 500 calories a day. After living like that for another 8 months and several turn downs and dating site failures(not even one date in 4 years!) I decided it wasn't worth it anymore. I kept telling myself I would start working out again if I ever hit 170. I "ballooned" back up to 176 after a couple of months. On my 40th birthday, two months ago, I had decided that my life was over and there was no reason to keep living. All the things I had done in the last couple years had made no changes to my life other than aesthetically and no matter how much I tried to fit in with the world around me I would never be accepted. The depression ran deep again with some serious considerations of just ending it all. I really thought about what had changed during the last couple months and came to the conclusion that it is possible that my current diet of bad foods had affected my thinking. I read or heard once that sugars could affect the mindset dramatically. I lay on my bed once again looking down at my body and I decided to start my programs again. Either having my mind occupied with thoughts of working out and goals or the change in diet or a combination of both got me back on track and I got back to 155. I am thinking of making a run at 145 or less. I guess to actually answer the question of "point of disgust" it would have been each time I laid on my bed and looked down. I offer no advice other than if one can look at that themselves and be genuinely accepting and happy with the appearance then do nothing but if you see the slightest bit of darkness try to reconstruct it to your own standards.6
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I was fifteen eating cookies out of a bag. My mother, God bless her, gently removed the bag from my hands and put it back in our pantry. I gave her what she calls a Look of Death, but I didn't grab the cookies again. The next morning, I weighed in at 188.8, and vowed I would never be 190. I never was.
I never really looked that bad, but my mom saw the weight creeping on...most of my family is quite large, and we're the exceptions. I'm grateful for her, even though my dad was *kitten*.3 -
Mine wasn't really about physical appearance. About 6 years ago, I was diagnosed pre-diabetic. I lost 85 pounds and have kept it off.3
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hit 170. On my 40th birthday, two months ago, I had decided that my life was over and there was no reason to keep living. All the things I had done in the last couple years had made no changes to my life other than aesthetically and no matter how much I tried to fit in with the world around me I would never be accepted. The depression ran deep again with some serious considerations of just ending it all.
Please, please, please seek professional, medical help for your depression.7 -
I received word that my blood sugar was now in the Diabetes Type 2 range. A co-worker, who is very overweight and has horrible eating habits told me "I heard you're one of us now--welcome to the Diabetes Club." That was a turning point for me. I knew I'd have to shape up eventually but that was really the breaking point.
The fact that there is even a concept of 'the Diabetes Club' says all that needs to be said about the tragic state of things with many countries' food industries. That really should not be a thing, and also wasn't one quite recently (I'm in my 40s but that's not THAT old! I remember a time when hardly anyone had diabetes—and it'd be Type I, hardly anyone had asthma, peanut allergy, etc. WTF!?). But even worse than that this shift has happened is how quickly we've just internalised it as 'normal'. What on earth can be done to turn this ship around?
Ok I'm a little off-topic. I'll contribute my own story about deciding to lose weight another time.1 -
After living like that for another 8 months and several turn downs and dating site failures(not even one date in 4 years!) I decided it wasn't worth it anymore. I kept telling myself I would start working out again if I ever hit 170. I "ballooned" back up to 176 after a couple of months. On my 40th birthday, two months ago, I had decided that my life was over and there was no reason to keep living. All the things I had done in the last couple years had made no changes to my life other than aesthetically and no matter how much I tried to fit in with the world around me I would never be accepted. The depression ran deep again with some serious considerations of just ending it all. I really thought about what had changed during the last couple months and came to the conclusion that it is possible that my current diet of bad foods had affected my thinking. I read or heard once that sugars could affect the mindset dramatically. I lay on my bed once again looking down at my body and I decided to start my programs again. Either having my mind occupied with thoughts of working out and goals or the change in diet or a combination of both got me back on track and I got back to 155. I am thinking of making a run at 145 or less. I guess to actually answer the question of "point of disgust" it would have been each time I laid on my bed and looked down. I offer no advice other than if one can look at that themselves and be genuinely accepting and happy with the appearance then do nothing but if you see the slightest bit of darkness try to reconstruct it to your own standards.
I second the previous poster's concern for your emotional health and also think seeing a professional may be called for. However, for whatever it's worth, please do understand that the social troubles you have had are absolutely normal in this day in age. I realise saying that is not actually a solution to your problem; I'm not aiming for the 'misery loves company' defence, just hoping to at least make it clear that if you're lonely and lacking in simple human contact it's not because you've done anything wrong. We are, as a society, living through a terrible age of loneliness and disconnection. Not everybody realises that because everybody tries to put on a brave face when they're in front of others. It's little comfort, I'm sure.
Out of left field suggestion: if you can afford it what about some travel? I have specific parameters for what I mean by 'travel' in this context, but I speak from experience. Try to carve out a block of time—at least a month if it is in any way feasible for you (I realise we have jobs and responsibilities) but two weeks if not. And don't stay in traditional hotels OR Airbnbs (well most types of Airbnb that is): what you're looking for is something like a backpacker hostel, but you don't need to actually be properly backpacking, nor do you need to be super young (they also have single rooms if you're not into the dorm thing). All types stay at hostels: single travellers, business people, families, and yes hippies too; ages skew youngish but 40 is far from out of the question and I've met several in their 50s and 60s! The key is that you stay in accommodation that has common rooms, cafeterias, rooftop terraces, stuff like that where guests don't just sit in their own rooms but simply position themselves in one of the common rooms, buy a beer from the refrigerator next to the reception desk, meet each other, ask each other where they've been to and where they're going next, etc. In my experience, people who meet each other travelling tend to stay friends because everybody is at loose ends during the liminal experience of travel, everybody is open and actually desiring to meet new people, have adventures together, etc. And you keep in touch because you have a shared experience together that nobody else from their home lives understands. In my case, people I met backpacking in Europe on one trip turned into friends I went to visit and stay with (free accommodation!) on the next backpacking trip to Asia and Australia a few years later. Budget-wise, I once did a two-month trip around Europe (staying in dorms, riding Eurrail) and actually had more money in my bank account when I got home than when I left. Note: I'd accrued a month of leave so got paid half the time I was gone, but I was also working at a non-profit so my salary was not impressive. It's more doable than people think, and really kickstarted me at a time when I also felt incredibly isolated and lonely in my normal life.5 -
None of my clothes fit. At 31, my joints ached and I was exhausted. But the final straw was the day I sat down and felt my stomach resting on my thighs. I hated that feeling, and I hated being out of control.
One month down, and many to go, I feel better and daily discovering things I can wear and activities I can do that I couldn't a month ago.7 -
I appreciate the thoughts and concerns of those who replied to my post. Coincidentally the thing that started my depression was a therapist. I had gone to her for a work related issue stemming from out performing everyone but not being compensated the same, and pound for pound far less, which eventually led to me starting my own company. Anyway, she wanted to steer the conversations to my personal life which I was against but that's the way we went. I was content with my life, maybe not happy but at least content. She started suggesting all the changes I made insisting that it would make me feel better even though I felt fine and just wanted to know why I was treated different than my co-workers. To be very blunt about my life at that point, I had never been laid while I was a non-smoking, sober, in shape, short hair, free thinking, independent person. From the age of 18 to 24 I lived a relatively healthy lifestyle, worked out regularly, ate right, not much drinking and had a decent income. But when I was out with friends I always noticed at the end of the night I was always alone. For those 6 years I was in a forced celibacy by women. It wasn't until I started drinking heavy and not caring about myself that I finally started getting noticed by women. Coincidentally that is how I scored in high school. I didn't even get a first kiss until I started drinking sophomore year. I quit after graduating to focus on life I or so I thought. Trust me, I know they weren't the right ones but at that point at least it was better than being alone. I lived like that from 25 to 31. Eventually I grew out of that and just sunk into a routine(rut) where I would just work, drink, repeat. During that time I maintained a weight of 175 which I was okay with. Had a couple relationships that just didn't work, basically they had to move and I wasn't that invested into the relationship. Then the work/therapist thing happened at 36. She made me feel, right or wrong, that my life was worthless. She made me believe that everything I was doing had made my life terrible even if I felt happy about it. I had no feelings of depression. I liked that I could have a couple beers after work even it led to getting drunk more times than not. But I knew it wasn't healthy mentally or physically. I tried telling her repeatedly that her suggestions to me have already been done and it did nothing for me. But ever the optimist I said I would do it again. So I went back to being sober, quit smoking, exercising again, etc. In fact that's when I noticed I had actually gained weight. Sure I was exercising but I wasn't counting calories or actually paying attention to foods I was eating. I took out fast foods and restaurants and was making my own meals. But my meals were technically 2 servings or more. I had stopped seeing the therapist because she made me feel worse about myself. I mean if the best version of me couldn't meet someone what was the point of being around. Besides I went there for work and she did nothing for that and I quit that job anyway. I gave thought to some of the things she said though and agreed that I still wasn't at my best since I was technically overweight. Then I did what I said in the original post, cutting down to 155lbs and following the other goals more strictly. I had a list made of all my goals and I had conquered them all except two, meeting a woman and having a child. I decided that if I reach 40 and do not have a child then it will never happen. Some people will chime in with "lots of people have kids after 40", and that's great, I just decided for myself that I do not want to be 50 with kids still in school. I would rather be planning an early retirement and maybe doing that traveling that someone suggested instead. As for travelling now, I'm not much for doing things alone and since starting my company I haven't had the resources to do much yet.
So now I'm back to being a non-smoking, sober, in shape, short hair, free thinking, independent person in a forced celibacy once again for the last 3+ years. My original plan was to to go back to my old life style once I got to 170. I am growing my hair back. I throw several parties throughout the year for big sporting events and have refrained from drinking but really want to just for the heck of it. Funny analogy - you don't need shoes to run but it does make it more enjoyable. The only thing that stops me is I know I will start smoking once I start drinking and I really don't want to do that. But when I did all that stuff I actually got laid so there is that.
Not really looking to make this about me just letting those who commented know that I'm fine. I'm in a good place as of now while I chase down 145. My most recent party was last weekend after I checked in at 155 and I had a ton of leftovers that I finally finished so I'm actually back in the low 160's but that'll be gone in no time. I'm a pretty loyal and dedicated to myself. I told myself I couldn't have a drink until I made 170 then changed it to 155 then changed it to 145 so I'm pretty sure I will change it again because 135 is still a possibility and physically I can handle it. But I also can handle double chocolate thins from chips ahoy so 135 is going to have to wait until those things go off the market.5 -
I remember it vividly.
I was used to adults asking me when I was due. I always chalked it up people being rude. We had a small church thanksgiving last November (2016) and my friend who was pregnant was talking to a five year old about how she would have a baby soon. The five year old then asked me when my baby was coming. It hurt so bad because I knew it was innocent. It hit me that the adults weren't just being rude, I really did look pregnant.
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A horrible photo.1
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I am turning 30 in a few months. I hate the way I look and I have for months now. I began taking a medication to help with some hormonal issues I was having and gained 10 pounds in 2 months! That certainly didn't help my insecurity. My husband is so supportive and says that he loves the way I look, but I am so uncomfortable. They say when you turn 30, your body changes. I don't want to be stuck like this forever! My health genes are TERRIBLE and I want to avoid any medical issues for as long as possible! I've lost a little and it's given me some motivation, but at this point I'm still searching for energy to exercise.
I've still been eating what I want as far as dinner with my family, just less of it. I know that when I start making healthier choices and exercise, I'll see more results!
Good luck to you all1 -
when i started having issues with reaching my feet to cut nails, or to tie shoelaces. wasnt disgusted, but i decided that i need to lose weight for the first time in my life.0
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