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Vague poetry thread

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Replies

  • gardengnomemanifestogardengnomemanifesto Posts: 428Deleted Member Posts: 428Deleted Member
    your words, they are like farts.
    I don't want to hear them,
    yet they feel good.
    R-E-L-I-E-F
  • eccomi_quieccomi_qui Posts: 1,883Member Member Posts: 1,883Member Member
    You want to be scary,
    I’ll give you that,
    But when push comes to shove,
    I’ll touch your lat.
    edited January 2018
  • CaptainFantastic00CaptainFantastic00 Posts: 4,631Member Member Posts: 4,631Member Member
    Will you succeed?
    You will indeed!
    98 3/4% guaranteed
    Kid, you'll move mountains
    (Not OC)
  • _seahorses5ever_seahorses5ever Posts: 1,160Member Member Posts: 1,160Member Member
    I'm on the toilet
    No more paper
    No more
    No more paper
    No more
    Oh *kitten*
  • gardengnomemanifestogardengnomemanifesto Posts: 428Deleted Member Posts: 428Deleted Member
    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    Sit on that toilet,
    Not on my face,
    Garden gnomes are a terrible race.

    The bidet is better
    it squirts with power
    maybe you better
    go plant a flower
  • cee134cee134 Posts: 33,842Member Member Posts: 33,842Member Member
    Nothing rhymes with Stuffing
    I am not bluffing.
    Cats attack rats,
    how about that?
  • eccomi_quieccomi_qui Posts: 1,883Member Member Posts: 1,883Member Member
    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    Sit on that toilet,
    Not on my face,
    Garden gnomes are a terrible race.

    The bidet is better
    it squirts with power
    maybe you better
    go plant a flower

    This is a rap battle,
    Between you and me,
    I’ll crush you like a sickly spleen.
    And when we’re done,
    The minstrels will sing,
    “damn that gnome was a terrible thing”.

    Word.
  • CaptainFantastic00CaptainFantastic00 Posts: 4,631Member Member Posts: 4,631Member Member
    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    Sit on that toilet,
    Not on my face,
    Garden gnomes are a terrible race.

    The bidet is better
    it squirts with power
    maybe you better
    go plant a flower

    This is a rap battle,
    Between you and me,
    I’ll crush you like a sickly spleen.
    And when we’re done,
    The minstrels will sing,
    “damn that gnome was a terrible thing”.

    Word.

    Honestly take this to the voice thread
  • WhereIsPJSolesWhereIsPJSoles Posts: 622Member Member Posts: 622Member Member
    You think you’re so cute
    And you’re not totally wrong
    But don’t piss me off
    I told you - sneaky strong
  • Timshel_Timshel_ Posts: 22,916Member Member Posts: 22,916Member Member
    Glance upon you,
    I turned.
    Hands upon you,
    My heart.
    Kisses upon you,
    My warmth.
    Lay upon you,
    My love.
  • Find_Me_AgainFind_Me_Again Posts: 346Member Member Posts: 346Member Member
    This is awesome :joy:
  • CaptainFantastic00CaptainFantastic00 Posts: 4,631Member Member Posts: 4,631Member Member
    Sitting at work wondering what to do
    Counting quarters so i can get gas too
    I am sleepy, exhausted ready for bed
    But i gotta sit here doing math in my head
    Cuz i am broke
  • RunHardBeStrongRunHardBeStrong Posts: 33,126Member Member Posts: 33,126Member Member
    I spent several minutes catching up.
    I can't compete, it's such a phenomenal feat.
    I'm hungry.
    Let's go eat some meat.
  • cee134cee134 Posts: 33,842Member Member Posts: 33,842Member Member
    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    Sit on that toilet,
    Not on my face,
    Garden gnomes are a terrible race.

    The bidet is better
    it squirts with power
    maybe you better
    go plant a flower

    This is a rap battle,
    Between you and me,
    I’ll crush you like a sickly spleen.
    And when we’re done,
    The minstrels will sing,
    “damn that gnome was a terrible thing”.

    Word.

    Honestly take this to the voice thread

    ubpw51mz2rqq.jpg
  • Timshel_Timshel_ Posts: 22,916Member Member Posts: 22,916Member Member
    cee134 wrote: »
    ubpw51mz2rqq.jpg


    Jerry Springer capitalized on them Vikings.
  • _seahorses5ever_seahorses5ever Posts: 1,160Member Member Posts: 1,160Member Member
    Sitting at work wondering what to do
    Counting quarters so i can get gas too
    I am sleepy, exhausted ready for bed
    But i gotta sit here doing math in my head
    Cuz i am broke

    Some friends
    They created a business
    Sell your underoos online
    Don't wash them
    You're welcome
  • JillianRumrillJillianRumrill Posts: 337Member Member Posts: 337Member Member
    you're behind it
    this whole cracked movement
    they wave their flags
    with your bloody hands
    you point and tell em "do it"

    wolves in sheep skins
    you let the devil in
    you swore an oath
    to the Lamb of God
    and now you're slaves to sin

    you started off so sweet
    like the master, go and wash the feet
    be humble, preach in the street
    now you live in a palace built on deceit

    sell you statues! sell your thrones!
    give up your mistresses and your lavish homes!
    but you won't, you're addicted to power
    give it up for your leader hiding in the high tower


  • eccomi_quieccomi_qui Posts: 1,883Member Member Posts: 1,883Member Member
    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    The creepy porn stache
    won't get you far
    even in a dark seedy bar
    go with the beard
    its the way to go
    if you want those lady juices
    to really flow

    I don’t have a stash,
    Lest you talkin bout Hustler,
    And my bar pickin’ skills are sick like a shuffler,
    My beard grows real fast like a composted flower,
    Lady juices drips around me like a broken shower.

    So sad your sausage
    has no holder
    I'd have a place for it
    if you were older

    You’re missing the meat of this rap battle bub,
    Like not finding your favourite video on porno hub,
    But allow me to help you,
    Set you on track.
    You’re probably a fine lookin’ little snack

    I can't win, young human
    but I like your cumin

    My notoriety precedes me,
    I just can’t escape it,
    ‘‘Twas a fine battle,
    I’m not being vapid.
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