Less Alcohol - March 2018- One day at a Time
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@JulieAL1969 I was hesitant to share it as I know many people on our thread do drink in moderation and I am absolutely not trying to preach.....seriously, to each his own, but I found it pretty compelling.
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@JenT304 Since this thread is for all stages, I thought it was good to share. I am on the alcohol explained sight that @xcjumper mentioned. I'm reading about relapse. http://www.alcoholexplained.com/additional-content/relapse/
We are all in different places: moderating, quitting, relapsing, etc. It's good to read and view what we each need to reach our goals. My husband is still drinking moderately but everyday because he can handle it, but I can't handle doing that. I don't preach to him at all. I believe like you said, to each his own.
For me, these type of videos and websites keep me motivated. Xo2 -
Something that I have been reminded of since starting dry February, alcohol should never be used as a coping mechanism. Celebration and having a good time are one thing but reprogramming myself to not use alcohol to deal with negative emotions is what I am focusing on now.
Being out with friends or family and not partaking got easier, now to the next step, no indulging and using it to "feel better" never works in the long run!!
Still learning and gaining strength from all of you !!9 -
My lil awkward win today.....around 5pm started feeling really tired and bored....thought of going to gym but was too uninspired. Decided I need to kill time by drinking.....resisted, debated, fought, gave in.....and finally gave up....got in my car and drove to the liquor store, parked in the lot......then a moment of clarity....if i could only drive away to the next lot, maybe i have time to think, drove to the next lot, parked, and checked my phone.....something said drive away....drove away and came home, made a healthy dinner and took a shower22
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Totally been there before. You made the right choice !3
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Bad weekend on Saturday. It is my bday month. My fellow gym mates and I went out to celebrate and everyone kept buying me drinks and I got wasted!!!! Yep that was my weekend.
Well happy birthday!
Nothing wrong with a little celebration on the weekend. I am sure you are back on track now. Those free ones are the hardest to turn down4 -
My lil awkward win today.....around 5pm started feeling really tired and bored....thought of going to gym but was too uninspired. Decided I need to kill time by drinking.....resisted, debated, fought, gave in.....and finally gave up....got in my car and drove to the liquor store, parked in the lot......then a moment of clarity....if i could only drive away to the next lot, maybe i have time to think, drove to the next lot, parked, and checked my phone.....something said drive away....drove away and came home, made a healthy dinner and took a shower
There... you made it!!.. whoohoo!! WELL DONE!!!
U must be super proud!! I am
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@NormInv look at you being a rock star! You get double points for actually being in the parking lot and talking yourself down :-)
@JenT304 I agree with Julie, thanks for posting that video. Knowledge is power!
@Stepping18 A very good point about retraining our brain to actually cope with whatever the problem is and not using alcohol to numb us. It doesn't help, you just emerge from the fog feeling poorly and still have to deal with real life.
@Alzzi76 You are one of our greatest cheerleaders, thank you for being here!
Closing in on 60 days since I started, I sure do feel great and will be eternally grateful for this thread and all of your experiences and encouragement! Love y'all! 6 -
My lil awkward win today.....around 5pm started feeling really tired and bored....thought of going to gym but was too uninspired. Decided I need to kill time by drinking.....resisted, debated, fought, gave in.....and finally gave up....got in my car and drove to the liquor store, parked in the lot......then a moment of clarity....if i could only drive away to the next lot, maybe i have time to think, drove to the next lot, parked, and checked my phone.....something said drive away....drove away and came home, made a healthy dinner and took a shower
Well done! In WW they'd say if you can just put off eating whatever junk it is you want for 10 or 15 min the craving will pass. Perhaps it's the same with alcohol. The title for your book, "Driving yourself sober".7 -
My limit was to be 3 drinks a week. Got frustrated with family - Ram Das says 'If you think you're enlightened, go spend a week with your family". Mine lives with me. Anyway, ended up with 4.5 glasses. 3 of them in one evening. Gack. New week, new goals. Thanks for being here.7
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Short article here, but it's so true!
http://www.savannahnow.com/entertainmentlife/20180308/hart-to-heart-maybe-mommyjuice-isnt-so-cute3 -
Morning all! Catching up on the thread - I was saddened to see so much heartbreak. I too tend to drink to numb emotions. Lately though it’s been more the amount of social activities going on. I am looking forward to a dry week, but next week I turn 40 and I’m going to Santa Barbara to celebrate and go wine tasting. I’ll try and be good! 8
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SanDiegofitmom wrote: »Morning all! Catching up on the thread - I was saddened to see so much heartbreak. I too tend to drink to numb emotions. Lately though it’s been more the amount of social activities going on. I am looking forward to a dry week, but next week I turn 40 and I’m going to Santa Barbara to celebrate and go wine tasting. I’ll try and be good!
That's exactly what we did for my 40th Birthday - Central Coast! You know, when I taste wine at places like that it's not usually too over the top, unless it really is an all day affair. I was with girl friends who liked to drink wine, but we also like to hike and sight see and do other things as well. We planned out the trip to mix up the wine tastings with other activities, so that it wasn't so out of control, especially since we were driving. So a walk in the morning, then breakfast with a mimosa, then some sight seeing, then lunch, then a winery, then some shopping, then dinner and wine there, or wine when we got back to the hotel. Enjoy!5 -
I stopped drinking February 27th in preparation for surgery on March 1st. It felt so good that I just kind of continued it. Sleep and motivation have improved greatly. I'm not saying I'm done with it forever...it's just been a nice break that is causing me to re-evaluate my relationship with alcohol. Perhaps "moderation" IS possible for me! Thanks for this awesome thread!9
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Sun and Mon down. I actually didn't even want anything. I slept 9 hours last night. Felt so good!5
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Headed to Dulles in a couple of hours. My SIL shocked me by getting us business class tickets. I have never, ever experienced an Atlantic crossing in luxury. Awesome for getting a real night’s sleep. But of course the first thing they do is offer champagne and then wine with dinner. First World “problems,” I know. But I’m working on a strategy right now. My guess is it will end up not only “When in Rome” but also “When on Air France.” I clearly haven’t even begun to master the drinking thing. If this is a school I put myself in the remedial class. At least thanks to this group I’m certain I won’t be the mess I would’ve been before January.
So wonderful to read about you guys getting it together as you turn 40. I missed that boat for sure, but I’m glad you’re on it.
Ciao everyone!!7 -
Headed to Dulles in a couple of hours. My SIL shocked me by getting us business class tickets. I have never, ever experienced an Atlantic crossing in luxury. Awesome for getting a real night’s sleep. But of course the first thing they do is offer champagne and then wine with dinner. First World “problems,” I know. But I’m working on a strategy right now. My guess is it will end up not only “When in Rome” but also “When on Air France.” I clearly haven’t even begun to master the drinking thing. If this is a school I put myself in the remedial class. At least thanks to this group I’m certain I won’t be the mess I would’ve been before January.
So wonderful to read about you guys getting it together as you turn 40. I missed that boat for sure, but I’m glad you’re on it.
Ciao everyone!!
Enjoy your vacation!4 -
WinoGelato wrote: »SanDiegofitmom wrote: »Morning all! Catching up on the thread - I was saddened to see so much heartbreak. I too tend to drink to numb emotions. Lately though it’s been more the amount of social activities going on. I am looking forward to a dry week, but next week I turn 40 and I’m going to Santa Barbara to celebrate and go wine tasting. I’ll try and be good!
That's exactly what we did for my 40th Birthday - Central Coast! You know, when I taste wine at places like that it's not usually too over the top, unless it really is an all day affair. I was with girl friends who liked to drink wine, but we also like to hike and sight see and do other things as well. We planned out the trip to mix up the wine tastings with other activities, so that it wasn't so out of control, especially since we were driving. So a walk in the morning, then breakfast with a mimosa, then some sight seeing, then lunch, then a winery, then some shopping, then dinner and wine there, or wine when we got back to the hotel. Enjoy!
Nice!! Exactly what I think we will do. We love to hike, bike and play tennis so we’ll mix in lots of healthy fun!3 -
Headed to Dulles in a couple of hours. My SIL shocked me by getting us business class tickets. I have never, ever experienced an Atlantic crossing in luxury. Awesome for getting a real night’s sleep. But of course the first thing they do is offer champagne and then wine with dinner. First World “problems,” I know. But I’m working on a strategy right now. My guess is it will end up not only “When in Rome” but also “When on Air France.” I clearly haven’t even begun to master the drinking thing. If this is a school I put myself in the remedial class. At least thanks to this group I’m certain I won’t be the mess I would’ve been before January.
So wonderful to read about you guys getting it together as you turn 40. I missed that boat for sure, but I’m glad you’re on it.
Ciao everyone!!
Oh my business class amazing! Have so much fun. You definitely have the tools now to enjoy and not overdo it. Maybe try and savor slowly and see how long you can make things last! My problem is always the fast drinking!!3 -
My lil awkward win today.....around 5pm started feeling really tired and bored....thought of going to gym but was too uninspired. Decided I need to kill time by drinking.....resisted, debated, fought, gave in.....and finally gave up....got in my car and drove to the liquor store, parked in the lot......then a moment of clarity....if i could only drive away to the next lot, maybe i have time to think, drove to the next lot, parked, and checked my phone.....something said drive away....drove away and came home, made a healthy dinner and took a shower
That !!! Gave, me chills. That was awesome. Good for you, what a powerful thing you did.4 -
Headed to Dulles in a couple of hours. My SIL shocked me by getting us business class tickets. I have never, ever experienced an Atlantic crossing in luxury. Awesome for getting a real night’s sleep. But of course the first thing they do is offer champagne and then wine with dinner. First World “problems,” I know. But I’m working on a strategy right now. My guess is it will end up not only “When in Rome” but also “When on Air France.” I clearly haven’t even begun to master the drinking thing. If this is a school I put myself in the remedial class. At least thanks to this group I’m certain I won’t be the mess I would’ve been before January.
So wonderful to read about you guys getting it together as you turn 40. I missed that boat for sure, but I’m glad you’re on it.
Ciao everyone!!
Oh I love flying Business, it makes it really hard to go back to coach on International flights! Take the champagne, get one nice glass of wine with dinner (since they actually give you choices and not just red or white), and then have a nice cup of tea while you watch movies and talk to your SIL before getting some good sleep so you hit the ground in Italy raring to go. And honestly, my experience in Italy was also not very "wet". They frown on the excessive drinking in most of Europe, from what I've noticed. We had a small carafe with lunch and another at dinner and then were more focused on the food and gelato than anything else. The only night I overdid it in Italy was when my sister, sister in law and I got a little emotional about our recently deceased moms. We drank too much, and were feeling it the next day, which just happened to be the day we had hired a driver for a tour of Tuscany to go wine tasting. We were so hung over, and then the hilly, windy roads made us car sick, so that none of us even wanted to drink - we finally had a little tasting in the afternoon at an actual winery but I joked that it was the soberest wine tasting tour that guy had ever hosted.
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Thank you @WinoGelato for the insider tips! Sounds like a great plan. And I know this will probably ruin me for coach forever but I’m happy to risk that!! I am laughing because I packed a couple of protein bars thinking that would be my dinner.3
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For those of you that have trouble with people that continue to pester you to "have just one" at a bar or social event, refusing to take no for an answer, my friend has the perfect response. She says, Oh no, wine (or whatever) gives me an immediate hot flash." The men are too uncomfortable to say anything else, and the women nod, but no one encourages her to order one after that.7
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OK obviously that last comment applied to women. I don't know any men that get hot flashes. Although that response from a man would certainly raise some eyebrows.
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I notice it seems like a lot of people are apologizing for celebrating something like a birthday, or another special occasion. I don’t think that those of us who can moderate should feel that need to apologize for that. Enjoy your special moments how you want to. If you want to without a drink that is awesome. But don’t apologize if you want that drink if you can handle it.8
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Sundays are a killer for me. I mean, I am pretty good throughout the week, and moderate at best on Friday and Saturday (but all fit in my daily calorie goal), but when the Sunday blues kick in, it's devastating. Not only the caloric intake, it's the Monday feeling like trash, starting my week off out on a bad foot because of my low energy, half assed workout. Any thoughts?2
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For those of you that have trouble with people that continue to pester you to "have just one" at a bar or social event, refusing to take no for an answer, my friend has the perfect response. She says, Oh no, wine (or whatever) gives me an immediate hot flash." The men are too uncomfortable to say anything else, and the women nod, but no one encourages her to order one after that.
Ha Ha! It's good to have a ready response, and this is a good one for some!
I also like a great quote from Holly Whittaker's hipsobriety.com blog:
"No, thank you." is a complete sentence.
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I notice it seems like a lot of people are apologizing for celebrating something like a birthday, or another special occasion. I don’t think that those of us who can moderate should feel that need to apologize for that. Enjoy your special moments how you want to. If you want to without a drink that is awesome. But don’t apologize if you want that drink if you can handle it.
I agree with this. The only person anybody needs to apologize to is yourself if you feel you have treated yourself badly by indulging, overindulging, etc. But, maybe, for some it is a way to stay accountable.
And another thought. A lot of times people (esp women) just use the word sorry in conversation. I know that I am guilty of this when I truly have nothing to be sorry for.
Just some thoughts.....7 -
For those of you that have trouble with people that continue to pester you to "have just one" at ......OK obviously that last comment applied to women. I don't know any men that get hot flashes. Although that response from a man would certainly raise.....
hahaha Jen i couldnt stop laughing especially when u mentioned men. I had to control my thoughts.
A few times I've said, " it's the sugar, I've sugar diabetes in the family and I have to be careful". Thats works. Its the hardest when u are offered a drink when the your arguing with yourself abt it too.I notice it seems like a lot of people are apologizing for celebrating something like a birthday, or another special occasion. I don’t think that those of us who can moderate should feel that need to apologize for that. Enjoy your special moments how you want to. If you want to without a drink that is awesome. But don’t apologize if you want that drink if you can handle it.
I luv it,.. your very gracious and understanding.TheDusticle wrote: »Sundays are a killer for me. I mean, I am pretty good throughout the week, and moderate at best on Friday and Saturday (but all fit in my daily calorie goal), but when the Sunday blues kick in, it's devastating. Not only the caloric intake, it's the Monday feeling like trash, starting my week off out on a bad foot because of my low energy, half assed workout. Any thoughts?
Hello, I'm with u here, my Sundays are my worst now. It used to be everyday but now I have strateges that ive got in place that comes automatically except on the old occasions my situation changes. I struggle there, thays when this thread comes in very helpful.
On Sundays I think of something else to occupy or take up my intrest so i drinking isn't my main focus. It's jolly hard when the whole atmosphere is all abt a good social drink.
My thoughts for you as suggestions is that if the reason u r drinking is feeling down then think of what u enjoy doing,..ie : sport , sight seeing, .. anything maybe somthing u have never done b4 and focus on how your going to achieve it.
Just a suggestion...
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Thanks so much @Alzzi76. The weather is getting nicer, certainly more time spent outside the better. And not on a deck or patio with a cocktail! Appreciate your thoughts.3
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