What nobody tells you about losing weight
Replies
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Smaller belts need the holes closer together. Going one belt hole is a more significant percentage of girth. I have one belt that fits, though I only have a coupe of holes left, but I have to adjust it where it is obviously too lose (drops down below the top button on pants) or where it can dig in when I bend over.5
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I notice everybody else's weight (especially children)- and I don't like it. I constantly want to offer unsolicited advice on living a healthy lifestyle because I want everybody to feel as good as I do.
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Vonny198334 wrote: »I'm finding it hard to come to terms with my smaller person fragility.
Had to leave my wonderful job this week as I'm moving long distance (honestly, still a bit broken hearted 😭💔) & that meant lots of goodbye hugs.
My entire life, I've been the heavier (and by default the "strongest") person so I've always been sensitive to that.
Now I'm not & men in particular do things that I've not experienced before. Some are great, like my lovely husband having no trouble picking me up bridal style!
But last week my best male work pal hugged me so forcefully he popped something in my back audibly...still suffering 😂 (bless, he felt so bad!)
Another strange thing was being lifted up into hugs by others & sort of shaken around in the air....that was....just bizarre because I've never experienced it...
Can't help but realise just how "vulnerable" bodily I am now... if that makes any sense at all? Does that resonate with anyone else?
Same here. I fell backwards in an exercise class a few days ago. Luckily I landed on the fullest part of my bottom. Unfortunately my bottom is no longer very padded and boy did it hurt. No permanent damage but I can remember being a bit like a padded ball. However there used to be sooo much more heft going down.
I still feel strong but now it's more about being limber and agile. Less sumo and more dancer. This feeling is particularly delightful and surprising.
So sorry to hear about moving on from your lovely job. I wish you lots of brilliant adventures in your slim new body as you make your move.
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brightresolve wrote: »How much it annoys me when someone says, "oh, you don't have to watch what you eat!" or, "oh, you don't have to work out!"
I feel like they're disrespecting the discipline and hard work it takes to be healthy ...
This. I don't want to eat cake or pizza, don't tell me I need to eat or I deserve "a treat". Those are chemicals, not a treat.
Also, I had a coworker tell me that I should stay the weight I was and shouldn't get any smaller. I was still overweight at the time. I told her he'll has, I'm gonna be strong af.
My contribution:
-Water really does make a huge difference, it gets easier. When you start drinking water, you're not going to want to wear pants with 3 buttons, a zipper and a belt haha.
-Everyones method is different, try different things and see what works for you.22 -
Edited: thought this was posted in another thread.0
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Gall stones hurt like ****. This derailed my last attempt after 12 lbs of loss. Don't have insurance or the money for surgery so I get to live with it. Just gotta take it slow. Also, water is delicious and is easily my favorite beverage.8
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I noticed that I break off my heals due to my weight! I am hoping that after getting to normal weight, I will wear them again!3
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dhiammarath wrote: »Vonny198334 wrote: »I'm finding it hard to come to terms with my smaller person fragility.
Had to leave my wonderful job this week as I'm moving long distance (honestly, still a bit broken hearted 😭💔) & that meant lots of goodbye hugs.
My entire life, I've been the heavier (and by default the "strongest") person so I've always been sensitive to that.
Now I'm not & men in particular do things that I've not experienced before. Some are great, like my lovely husband having no trouble picking me up bridal style!
But last week my best male work pal hugged me so forcefully he popped something in my back audibly...still suffering 😂 (bless, he felt so bad!)
Another strange thing was being lifted up into hugs by others & sort of shaken around in the air....that was....just bizarre because I've never experienced it...
Can't help but realise just how "vulnerable" bodily I am now... if that makes any sense at all? Does that resonate with anyone else?
In my head, I am much bigger. Much wider. Much more round.
In reality, it does not take much at all to shove me out of place.
I used to be a fixture, hoping that if I pulled myself in, I could be smaller. Less environmental and more transient.
Now, I forget that I am not a force of mass and gravity and find myself surprised by the emergence of slender bones. Still got a ways to go (~15-20kg), so I'm not sure how I'll feel when I get to my goal.
But yes, this definitely resonates!
The mind is a funny creature, and I'm convinced it has a mind of its own, separate from me. It tries to tell me that even though I fit into smaller clothing, take up less space, etc, that I am still the obese-me. Hiding in plain sight!
As usual, I feel very similar to you my love! Though it's improving...think because folk keep doing things to test my own perception of me! A lot of the time I still feel obese, possibly because I've not reached goal yet but more likely because I've never NOT been obese before, really.
Still get a fright when I catch my reflection sometimes but mainly I don't see anything bordering "thin" yet others persist in saying how "tiny" I am. If I'm in a small space & someone needs to pass through the same time I do, I can be guilty of quickly throwing myself against the wall to give them "space" 😂. They must think I'm crazy....
Just doesn't match up all of the time! We'll get there....it's taken time to shift this weight, sure it'll take us time to shift the mindset too xx10 -
Vonny198334 wrote: »I'm finding it hard to come to terms with my smaller person fragility.
Had to leave my wonderful job this week as I'm moving long distance (honestly, still a bit broken hearted 😭💔) & that meant lots of goodbye hugs.
My entire life, I've been the heavier (and by default the "strongest") person so I've always been sensitive to that.
Now I'm not & men in particular do things that I've not experienced before. Some are great, like my lovely husband having no trouble picking me up bridal style!
But last week my best male work pal hugged me so forcefully he popped something in my back audibly...still suffering 😂 (bless, he felt so bad!)
Another strange thing was being lifted up into hugs by others & sort of shaken around in the air....that was....just bizarre because I've never experienced it...
Can't help but realise just how "vulnerable" bodily I am now... if that makes any sense at all? Does that resonate with anyone else?
Same here. I fell backwards in an exercise class a few days ago. Luckily I landed on the fullest part of my bottom. Unfortunately my bottom is no longer very padded and boy did it hurt. No permanent damage but I can remember being a bit like a padded ball. However there used to be sooo much more heft going down.
I still feel strong but now it's more about being limber and agile. Less sumo and more dancer. This feeling is particularly delightful and surprising.
So sorry to hear about moving on from your lovely job. I wish you lots of brilliant adventures in your slim new body as you make your move.
Aww, your poor slender bottom...that does sound like an ouch moment!
Can complete relate to being stronger in a different way...it's much more satisfying when you can lift/move something or even yourself due to working hard rather than the happenstance of your "heft".
Think it's coming to terms with being at "the mercy" of others though....folk just being able to pick me up & move me should the mood take them. It's not necessarily a bad thing (would hope it never became a terrible thing....) but it sure takes some getting used to!
Thanks so much for your lovely wishes...am looking forward to it & also think it's very strange that everyone I meet from here on in will just believe this is how I am(probably always was) bodily 😂4 -
Vonny198334 wrote: »dhiammarath wrote: »Vonny198334 wrote: »I'm finding it hard to come to terms with my smaller person fragility.
Had to leave my wonderful job this week as I'm moving long distance (honestly, still a bit broken hearted 😭💔) & that meant lots of goodbye hugs.
My entire life, I've been the heavier (and by default the "strongest") person so I've always been sensitive to that.
Now I'm not & men in particular do things that I've not experienced before. Some are great, like my lovely husband having no trouble picking me up bridal style!
But last week my best male work pal hugged me so forcefully he popped something in my back audibly...still suffering 😂 (bless, he felt so bad!)
Another strange thing was being lifted up into hugs by others & sort of shaken around in the air....that was....just bizarre because I've never experienced it...
Can't help but realise just how "vulnerable" bodily I am now... if that makes any sense at all? Does that resonate with anyone else?
In my head, I am much bigger. Much wider. Much more round.
In reality, it does not take much at all to shove me out of place.
I used to be a fixture, hoping that if I pulled myself in, I could be smaller. Less environmental and more transient.
Now, I forget that I am not a force of mass and gravity and find myself surprised by the emergence of slender bones. Still got a ways to go (~15-20kg), so I'm not sure how I'll feel when I get to my goal.
But yes, this definitely resonates!
The mind is a funny creature, and I'm convinced it has a mind of its own, separate from me. It tries to tell me that even though I fit into smaller clothing, take up less space, etc, that I am still the obese-me. Hiding in plain sight!
As usual, I feel very similar to you my love! Though it's improving...think because folk keep doing things to test my own perception of me! A lot of the time I still feel obese, possibly because I've not reached goal yet but more likely because I've never NOT been obese before, really.
Still get a fright when I catch my reflection sometimes but mainly I don't see anything bordering "thin" yet others persist in saying how "tiny" I am. If I'm in a small space & someone needs to pass through the same time I do, I can be guilty of quickly throwing myself against the wall to give them "space" 😂. They must think I'm crazy....
Just doesn't match up all of the time! We'll get there....it's taken time to shift this weight, sure it'll take us time to shift the mindset too xx
And I to you, @Vonny198334
! Haha, I also find myself squeezing into corners, remembering the gravitational pull of my bulk until I realize there's like enough space to fit a whole 'nother person and then I'm like, "FOUND IT!"
Like I was searching for something.
Our minds WILL catch up. So it must BE. hehe7 -
That you will not be comfortable in any place sitting down without extra padding.
That sometimes you will get angry and remorseful about the fact that you did not do this sooner so you could have more quality time with your family.
And as everyone has said, that your mind plays tricks on you.15 -
That you will eat/chew slower (actually putting your fork down as you purposely linger at chewing and slowly swallowing your food and drink) and actually taste and enjoy your food now so much better than when you used to "scarf" your food down at lightening speed.
That you can eat whatever you want to, just smaller portions of whatever you like.
That food is no longer "the boss of you" you become "master" of your appetite.
That after being taught all of your young life to "clean your plate", you no longer "have to" clean your plate--that you can fully enjoy eating half of your plate now and eat the other half later, if at all.
That food/eating no longer is on your mind 24X7X365--this is a dream that WILL/CAN/DOES come true.
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dhiammarath wrote: »Vonny198334 wrote: »dhiammarath wrote: »Vonny198334 wrote: »I'm finding it hard to come to terms with my smaller person fragility.
Had to leave my wonderful job this week as I'm moving long distance (honestly, still a bit broken hearted 😭💔) & that meant lots of goodbye hugs.
My entire life, I've been the heavier (and by default the "strongest") person so I've always been sensitive to that.
Now I'm not & men in particular do things that I've not experienced before. Some are great, like my lovely husband having no trouble picking me up bridal style!
But last week my best male work pal hugged me so forcefully he popped something in my back audibly...still suffering 😂 (bless, he felt so bad!)
Another strange thing was being lifted up into hugs by others & sort of shaken around in the air....that was....just bizarre because I've never experienced it...
Can't help but realise just how "vulnerable" bodily I am now... if that makes any sense at all? Does that resonate with anyone else?
In my head, I am much bigger. Much wider. Much more round.
In reality, it does not take much at all to shove me out of place.
I used to be a fixture, hoping that if I pulled myself in, I could be smaller. Less environmental and more transient.
Now, I forget that I am not a force of mass and gravity and find myself surprised by the emergence of slender bones. Still got a ways to go (~15-20kg), so I'm not sure how I'll feel when I get to my goal.
But yes, this definitely resonates!
The mind is a funny creature, and I'm convinced it has a mind of its own, separate from me. It tries to tell me that even though I fit into smaller clothing, take up less space, etc, that I am still the obese-me. Hiding in plain sight!
As usual, I feel very similar to you my love! Though it's improving...think because folk keep doing things to test my own perception of me! A lot of the time I still feel obese, possibly because I've not reached goal yet but more likely because I've never NOT been obese before, really.
Still get a fright when I catch my reflection sometimes but mainly I don't see anything bordering "thin" yet others persist in saying how "tiny" I am. If I'm in a small space & someone needs to pass through the same time I do, I can be guilty of quickly throwing myself against the wall to give them "space" 😂. They must think I'm crazy....
Just doesn't match up all of the time! We'll get there....it's taken time to shift this weight, sure it'll take us time to shift the mindset too xx
And I to you, @Vonny198334! Haha, I also find myself squeezing into corners, remembering the gravitational pull of my bulk until I realize there's like enough space to fit a whole 'nother person and then I'm like, "FOUND IT!"
Like I was searching for something.
Our minds WILL catch up. So it must BE. hehe
This. I can easily pass between parked cars that I thought too narrow. And in restaurants, I surprise myself when I can squeeze through the gap between tables or the behind chairs without jostling other diners.8 -
long_for_me wrote: »I noticed that I break off my heals due to my weight! I am hoping that after getting to normal weight, I will wear them again!
I have discovered that I can even wear high(ish) heels. It used to be so uncomfortable even with the slightest heel and I only owed flats. Now I can wear a mid-heel all day and not suffer--well at least not too much.6 -
-My feet are smaller, needed new shoes. My boots no longer fit because my calves are 4 inches smaller.
-Sitting anywhere is easier. I used to look for the largest chair, the largest booth. I'm still very heavy, but can fit in any seat now no problem.
-People in general, pay more attention to me. I think though, that part of this is my attitude, my confidence has changed.
-Men look me in the eye a lot now. It kind of freaks me out. Maybe I'm more confident and I'm looking at them? I'm not sure.
-I can cross my legs.
-Clothes look much cuter.
-You become a different person inside, in many ways. Because you know the struggles of losing weight.
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Depending on heaviest/starting size, you may have a seemingly endless pit of "fat clothes" to dispose of or give away. It was fun at first... trying on the old stuff and making room in the closet as item after item filled multiple Hefty bags. But now, finding that forgotten blouse, sweater or skirt is becoming a pain, especially since those are the nicest and most expensive items. And the more sizes lost, the more ridding required.
But... I am looking forward to the day I finally find that last oversized item and bid it farewell forever.
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Add me to the list of people whose feet have shrunk. I've only gone down half a size, but that's from a 6–6.5 to a 5.5–6. It actually kind of sucks because some shoes I like seem not to be made in sizes lower than 6. Harumph.8
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My feet are smaller now too. Or my shoes were stretched out from my formerly fat feet. Either way, there are several pair I can’t wear anymore, as I walk out of them. Some I remedied with insoles.
Also, all of my high boots are “wide calf” and are too wide on my leg now. They’re better if I tuck straight leg jeans in.8 -
ladychris29 wrote: »Depending on heaviest/starting size, you may have a seemingly endless pit of "fat clothes" to dispose of or give away. It was fun at first... trying on the old stuff and making room in the closet as item after item filled multiple Hefty bags. But now, finding that forgotten blouse, sweater or skirt is becoming a pain, especially since those are the nicest and most expensive items. And the more sizes lost, the more ridding required.
But... I am looking forward to the day I finally find that last oversized item and bid it farewell forever.
Consider a tailor or taking in yourself for the more expensive items - it may be worth it!4 -
rheddmobile wrote: »ladychris29 wrote: »Depending on heaviest/starting size, you may have a seemingly endless pit of "fat clothes" to dispose of or give away. It was fun at first... trying on the old stuff and making room in the closet as item after item filled multiple Hefty bags. But now, finding that forgotten blouse, sweater or skirt is becoming a pain, especially since those are the nicest and most expensive items. And the more sizes lost, the more ridding required.
But... I am looking forward to the day I finally find that last oversized item and bid it farewell forever.
Consider a tailor or taking in yourself for the more expensive items - it may be worth it!
Seriously. I have a small handful of dresses that I love so much! I bought them as rewards when I started losing weight... Now that I'm more-or-less in maintenance, they're too big again.
I've been slowly but surely making alterations on them, myself, as I'm a little handy with sewing. Definitely consider doing so, yourself. If the choice is between giving them away (and losing them forever) and making an alteration that could throw them back into the lineup... why not!5
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