We broke up because...
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She kept stealing my over the knee socks. I was cold!0
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Kept wearing socks with sandals. It was just too weird.
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He wore sandals to bed. That was weird0
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She wanted 13 of everything and I'm triskaidekaphobic0
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She never wore shoes anywhere. It was embarrassing, and her feet were soooo dirty.0
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She kept thinkin I was somebody else, then blaming the internet for the mix-up0
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She said shed never make me a scrambled egg sandwich while barefoot and pregnant so im out!!
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His beard gave me a rash on my thighs and he refused to moisturize that beard!0
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He preferred bearded men and liked it rough. I told him I'm not into prison sex.0
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He wasn't rough enough!0
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Kept wanting me to smell her fingers.0
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one day out of the blue he just disappeared. poof and he was gone. i assumed this meant we broke up0
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She didn't want to be part of my magic act0
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He tried to cut me in half1
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She was only halfway present0
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He wanted presents every Wednesday0
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She Never wanted to celebrate hump day0
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He thought Hump Day meant riding camels to work0
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She had a different definition of riding camels0
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