WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR APRIL 2019

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  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 9,825 Member
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    Oh Margaret ,my heart aches for you..to have to witness all that and trying to help your son get the help he needs.. my prayers are with you.
    Well I went to sleep around 6:30 -7 and am awake now but will try and get a bit more rest..have to wake up at 3 and drink more junk.. my daughter coming to pick me up at 8 - 8:15 to take me over.
  • GodMomKim
    GodMomKim Posts: 3,661 Member
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    Hi Gals,

    Katla – don’t be embarrassed, actually that is good, KNOWING the cause is most of the answer.

    Lisa – A great quicky greenhouse is gallon milk jugs with the cap removed and the bottom cut out, then if you know you are getting a cold snap just zip out and shove the jugs over the plants and into the ground. Looks really funny, but works like a champ!

    Tracey – LOL

    Margaret – I think I have suspected there was more to your story, but would never have guessed this. I am so sad for you, your son, and your DH – Mental health and mental illness is so so mis-understood and mis-handled. The type of person that makes a good police officer is not the type that is good in this situation; while that is no excuse for the behavior they exhibited it seems to me that just like they would call for a sniper or a swat team there should be a mental health team they could call.


    Kim from N. California
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 9,825 Member
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    well i couldnt go back to sleep so I have been up since 12:30, figure after procedure I will come home and sleep. so not worried about it, have made the second dose of stuff and put in fridge to chill. much easier to tolerate when cold..
    going to just have a cup of hot water now, dont feel like tea.. will go walk the dogs early and check on DFIL..
    day 4 today of not really eating Tom did get a cup and a 1/2 of ice cream into him at dinner last night, and we are trying at least to push fluids.. but we will do what we need to do make the quality of his life and if so his passing as smooth as possible..contacted his nieces and they will come up to see him Sunday... texted his brother too..
  • wizzywig
    wizzywig Posts: 1,246 Member
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    Margaret how awful for you having to go through that, I agree with Kim, there should be a specialist team to call for these circumstances. Normal police officers are not trained sufficiently to deal with mental health issues. It seems as if you had the situation under control and with a bit of sensitivity from the officers, I'm sure you could have persuaded your son to go to the hospital.

    I hope your son is now getting the help he needs. Sending love your way for the strength to keep on fighting for your son and his rights.

    Viv UK <3
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 9,825 Member
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    ugh ok, the second part was even worse than the first. I have been sick both ways this morning... I am so tired now, but cant go back to sleep now..
  • klanders30
    klanders30 Posts: 2,569 Member
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    Margaret (((((<3 <3))))) and strength to you and your son. Knowing you, you've probably looked for resources through NAMI but if not, try contacting them for additional support. Just like a medical alert bracelet, there should be a mental health resource team and not the police to help with transition in and out of hospitals.
    My SIL has bipolar and similarly the drugs either need to be adjusted or she stops taking them and then slides into a sleepless mania cycle. So very challenging to live with, right now she is adjusting to a new protocol but this disease is for life, she holds her faith close as your son does. My thoughts are with you, hopefully this cycle subsides quickly and he can continue healing in his new home with medical support. <3<3

    NYKAREN
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,372 Member
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    Margaret - I hardly know what to say, but my thoughts are with you and sending love. <3<3<3 My ex MIL had to be sectioned once and she was extremely reluctant, but luckily it did not turn to violence, even though the police were involved. It was very, very sad though. Later she escaped from the hospital and walked a long way along a main road with bleeding feet because she wanted to go to the police station to check that the people who took her in really were policemen. She had many such episodes while I knew her, including running away for a week. In between she was the loveliest person and a wonderful grandmother - a great example to me. What support are you getting? It's hardest on the family.

    The house seems very empty and quiet today. :'( I so miss their little voices.

    Last night's French Circle was hilarious. The speaker was a man from Wolverhampton in England, who had a French parent. He was wearing a beret! He was passionate about a famous French footballer called Zidane, and showed clips of his games. Then we had some clips of a French comedian called Coluche, and then some information about a priest called Abbé Pierre, whom this guy had met and had changed his life. The thing in common with all of them is that they had taken to "good works" as an adjunct to their fame. Feeding and housing the homeless mainly. The speaker was really jolly and enthusiastic and we had a very good evening. It all feels very bizarre to be in the middle of Hove, listening to people speaking French all round you, and cheering French football.
    Next Wednesday we may go to an invitation only reception for French /Anglo people for drinks and nibbles and some talks about the economy. If we don't like it and don't understand it, we can always go home!

    DH has gone off to cricket, poor love, it is freezing. I am on my own for four days, apart from the mornings/evenings. I will cook an evening meal and leave his to be heated up when he gets in. I don't envy him one bit. On Sunday I'm going to join the family to watch the Brighton Marathon near where they live. Huge crowds obviously. It's a shame my son couldn't run, but the participants still need supporting! It does pass near us, but I thought it would be fun to see the kids.

    Much love, Heather UK xxxxxxx
  • auntiebk
    auntiebk Posts: 2,521 Member
    edited April 2019
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    Terri, yay you indeed for giving the doughnuts a wide berth. Had a coupon for same, left it on the bakery county and ran not walked away... ;)
    KJ     it would take more than a six pack and strobe lights... in fact I cannot imagine anything short of a physical threat could get Joe to dance. At last I've embraced Barbie's golf/dance wisdom, but can't help being a bit wistful...
    Katla enjoy planning your trip! Whew!
    Margaret (((hugs))) and prayers.
    Rita great success and great advice. KETO would not work for me, just reading about your bullet proof coffee makes me :sick:
    Kim "... a mental heath team they could call" brilliant! Would that it were so.
    NYKaren "just like a medical alert bracelet" another brilliant idea. From your mouth to God's ear.
    Heather sounds like you dodged the Bea bullet. Whew!

    Welcome back Lala in Denver!

    Glorious tho' windy day. T'ai Chi, Farmers' market, coffee with friend, dink around garden, dog group, stir fry. Alas, rain forecast tomorrow, but hoping there will be breaks during which I can transplant lettuce, mustard, pak choi. If not, will play in the garage potting shed and transplant the cucumbers, maybe pur the plastic mini-greenhouse together. Lanette if you want to see human hair-like seedlings, sprout some qinoa. Hard to imagine they'll ever become sturdy stalks.

    p.s. feeling like I don't spend enough time with Joe, asked him to teach me to drill. Wanted some drainage holes in the plastic yoghurt containers I'll use for the cucumber transplants. Joe is a patient teacher, it was a sweet and precious time and I'm now more confident with the drill. Must think of other projects I can ask him to teach/help me with.

    Lighter, lovelies!
    f8qt1s098sxm.gifBarbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
    walk one more step 7/30, 60 g protein 10/30, rx/vits 9/30, meditate 3/30, knee exercises 3/30, SWSY 0/30, play with Tumble 8/30, hang up or purge art 0/4 AF 6/30.
    Word for 2019: "GOOD" good attitude, good food, good times, good choices, good enough, feel good, GOOD!
    04/10 LT: dog group-Y MT: fertilize carrot bed & spray mandarin-Y ST: mix soil and fertilizer for cuke transplants-Y
  • LisaInAR
    LisaInAR Posts: 2,020 Member
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    Good morning, all,

    Margaret    , my dear, I have no words, no comfort big enough for this... Kim said it best, I think, that good police officers just don't make good mental health professionals. They're oriented around protecting those nearby and themselves without regard to the health/safety/well-being of the person they're working to get into protective custody.

    Kim, thank you for the advice on the gallon jugs - I'll see if I can collect a few over this year for next spring's planting. There's green growth showing at the base of all the plants that got frozen, so it may just be their little outer branches that died back. :) After all our years in the desert, being in a place with incredibly fertile soil is such a joy for my husband--all his fruit trees are thriving, and he loves taking care of them. I love watching him come back in with a smile from every walk around his property.

    Here's a question for you or any of our gardeners. We transplanted a young mimosa tree in late October, early November. It appears that the main trunk (probably two inches in diameter) and its branches are now dry and lifeless, but there's new growth coming up from the root system, green and straight, already two feet tall. Do we simply get rid of the main trunk and branches? Should we leave a couple feet of the main trunk to stabilize the new growth? We snapped a couple of the small branches, and they're definitely dry and dead.

    Rather than use the A/C in the whole house, which is staying a comfortable 74/75 degrees throughout the 85-degree days outside, we put a window air conditioner in our bedroom... and I slept like a baby last night. If I wake up sweaty, it disorients me, leaves me cranky all day. Glad we've got our electric bill averaging in place, it's going to come in handy this summer!

    Got most of what I gained in March off, but a few more to go to get back to my February weight. Did my walk in the park again yesterday, pleased with that.

    Much love to all,
    Lisa in AR
  • okiewoman510
    okiewoman510 Posts: 1,300 Member
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    Margaret - I am so sorry. I have nothing to offer but prayers and big virtual hugs.

    Okie in the TX Hill Country
  • KJLaMore
    KJLaMore Posts: 2,837 Member
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    <3 Oh Margaret <3 - Sending love, hugs, thoughts, prayers, vibes (whatever you need) for peace and strength for both you and your son. I agree with the others in that there is a gaping chasm in health care when it comes to caring for our mentally ill. No words. :( Love, KJ (Kelly)
  • kymarai
    kymarai Posts: 3,632 Member
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    Crazy times are upon us once again! Work, eat, sleep. Little time for much else. The stresses could drive a sane person insane. Good thing I am already partway there. I miss you ladies!

    Upsides, I didn't gain or lose in March and I am getting in lots of steps. Downside is between work and allergies I am exhausted. I use to be able to stay up and work late. Use to! Nope, now between 9-10 my body says go to bed! I have to remember that for the 1 or 2 customers I get that are difficult, there are a 100 or more that I love dealing with.

    My tips for all those with power equipment to get serviced,
    1. Support your local dealers. Buy from them and you know where to get parts and service. It isn't their job to tell you where can can get the mower you bought at a giant box store serviced. Just saying....
    2. Small businesses are just that, small. Real estate is prime. If you expect them to hang onto your mower for over a year that isn't worth fixing, it probably isn't going to happen. If you can't afford the repair, then pay your fees and store it at your house until you can afford it.
    3. Winter really is the best time to get units serviced. The dealers aren't busy, grass isn't growing, and thexwait isn't as long. I dont understand that people wait until the grass is growing and then think theirs is the only mower in the shop-smh


    Sorry for the rant. I said it has been crazy. So for April my goals are sleep, drink water (too busy!), and try to keep some sanity.

    Love and miss you ladies!

    Kylia
    In Ohio where the grass is growing and mowers are multiplying quickly!
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 9,825 Member
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    well the only good thing about having colonoscopy prep is im a few lbs lighter, not the way I wanted to lose it. but will take it..
    DFIL is on 3rd day of not eating.. well Tom got a bit of ice cream in him last night,he will go tonight also..
    Tom supposed to leave next Weds for Florida for a week.. with his dad the way he is he might cancel for now..
  • margaretturk
    margaretturk Posts: 5,099 Member
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    The thing I want to see changed is even if the mental ill person has a warrant (My son's has since been dropped once I talked to the courts.) is medical need triumphs going to jail. If he had been shot, stabbed, or having a heart attack they would have sent him to hospital first.

    I agree I need to talk to some at Nami about this.

    Right now getting son through this is number one. This illness is so difficult and now he has a trauma on top of this. I have to be aware I am traumatised to and need all the help I can get.

    M I know you understand dealing with a brain injured husband. Now think if when he had his injury they tased him and handcuffed him after his injury.

    What they did was sooo wrong, and they do not even know it.

    :heart: Margaret
  • bwcetc
    bwcetc Posts: 2,781 Member
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    {{{{Margaret}}}} ...this is so wrong on so many levels. I am proud of you and your response to the situation. Your son could have no better advocate. I will be praying. <3
  • 1948Peachy
    1948Peachy Posts: 1,511 Member
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    MARGARET ~ Add me to all who are praying for you and your son. So thankful that he has you to stand by him and support him through these episodes. Praying he will get the help he needs.

    Carol in GA
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 16,736 Member
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    Iiii
  • SophieRosieMom
    SophieRosieMom Posts: 3,434 Member
    edited April 2019
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    Lisa - regarding your mimosa tree, it might be grafted onto rootstock which is now sprouting, and if so the new growth coming up might not be the mimosa you wanted. I am unfamiliar with them - you might call a local nursery or Extension Office (Master Gardeners!) and ask them if that's how mimosas are typically sold. I know apple trees up here are often grafted onto crab apple rootstock. I'm enough of a renegade that if your mimosa were in our yard, I'd cut the dead stuff out and see what the new growth turns into, lol.

    Barbara AHMOD - you are quite the gardener! I attended some Master Gardener training a couple weeks ago and they told about raising quinoa, and some are already growing it around here in their gardens. Not quite the Andes but close enough, lol. I recall the trainer said the minute it's ready to harvest, the birds will try to get there first. :D

    Allie - sounds as if Tom's dad is nearing the end, now stopping eating. You've been a faithful friend to him and I know you'll miss him. Good luck with that colonoscopy and hope that's the last one for a long, long time!

    Kylia     - understandable your frustration right now! Our local shop sends out postcards each fall to previous clients with a 10% off deal to induce homeowners to get their mowers in before spring. I think we messed up and had a local handyman/"friend" who used to work at a shop go ahead and winterize ours. He did the minimal, charged a lot. We'll be taking it back to the power shop this winter for a real winterization.

    Margaret - I wonder if there's a way to flag your son/your address in the system (911) that he has a mental health issue so the dispatchers can tell the responding officers and they don't go charging in under the wrong pretenses and have more awareness of the situation. You might call your local 911 center and see if that's possible. So sorry to hear about his/your ordeal. He's so lucky to have you there as an advocate. ((((HUGS)))) to him and you.

    Lisa in Ohio     - you have come to the right place, for sure. Congrats on your loss!

    OK ladies, make it a good day <3

    Lanette
    Rainy/sopping wet SW WA State B) I wish!

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