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Unwanted advice at gym

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  • lynn_glenmontlynn_glenmont Member Posts: 8,362 Member Member Posts: 8,362 Member
    phinners wrote: »
    Sadly, or maybe thankfully depending on what theyre going to say absolutely no one speaks to each other at my gym. No nods, hellos, hi or bye. Its the most unfriendly place Ive ever been. So I just hunker down and do my thing. Shame really. Tell him politely thanks but you're fine as you are. He probably thought he was being helpful, so just tell him thanks but no thanks.

    She did that, but he wouldn't let it go.
    I just said ok, I have a personal trainer already and she told me my form is fine, thanks. Then i continued my work out and he was like "sorry if I offended you" I said no, its fine then he continued to annoy me....."you look p****d off".
  • rebbyliciousrebbylicious Member Posts: 621 Member Member Posts: 621 Member
    If I was doing something dangerous, I would want to know. I can’t risk an injury and time off from the gym to gain more weight! 😬 But subtly so I don’t feel like an idiot. But if the trainer says it’s ok, my reply would have included that knowledge. “My trainer said my form is great, but thanks for your concern”. I don’t know why men feel the need to check our form when I don’t think I have ever seen a man correct another man’s form.
  • AlexNLeonardAlexNLeonard Member, Premium Posts: 1 Member Member, Premium Posts: 1 Member
    I have had this happen...but I have also done this.... :# My experience I had a guy tell me how to do dumbbell pull overs and then proceeded to show me how to do them. I already knew how to do them and I just let him tell me..then when he walked away I did them the way I was trained to (by a professional trainer)...the one time I gave advice was when I saw a girl actually injure herself and I was worried she was going to keep lifting after doing so, and I then stopped her and gave her advice on how to avoid it happening again. She ignored me, but I just didn't want to see her getting hurt anymore.

    I think if the advice is given in good nature with good intentions, than it's fine. I've had people ask me about lifts I was doing and what muscle groups they work..and I've had people ask me how to do simple push-ups and pull-ups..and I'll respond and try to be helpful. I think it's about the approach as well.
  • lemurcat2lemurcat2 Member Posts: 5,734 Member Member Posts: 5,734 Member
    Very annoying.
  • leeanneedithleeanneedith Member Posts: 13 Member Member Posts: 13 Member
    I've had a few guys try to give me advice in Muay Thai classes. I've been hitting pads for over three years, and I go to different sparring and drilling classes 4 times a week, and have had private lessons.

    I don't mind it if he's better than me (the regular fighters are recognizable), or has advice that's accurate; however, I hate it when I get the new or amateur kickboxers give me advice that I know is wrong. I've had some new people tell me advice that our head coach has specifically told us not to do! I'm not in the mood to argue with a stranger that their advice is incorrect, so I just nod and then give advice right back at them at a later point in the class. I'm not there to boost another person's ego at my own expense.
  • ZichuZichu Member Posts: 541 Member Member Posts: 541 Member
    I always feel like it depends on the situation and what their intentions are. I've seen people doing stuff they shouldn't be doing when it comes to conventional lifts, but I don't want to be that guy that goes up to someone and gives them advice and them taking offense to it.

    I know if I was going to potentially hurt myself, then I would like someone to come up to me and explain to me why I was doing something the wrong way and guide me through it. If they have more experience than me I would love to hear it.

    Some people who work at gyms don't have a clue how to do anything. I wouldn't take advice off any of the staff that work at the gym I go to, they're always bringing in new people and they look like they've never lifted in their life.
  • jdh419jdh419 Member Posts: 54 Member Member Posts: 54 Member
    Dolly989 wrote: »
    Today I was doing barbell squats in my gym when I saw some guy staring at me for awhile but thought I was just being paranoid. He then came over to me to tell me the weight I was squatting with was very heavy. Taking me off guard I just said "um thanks I guess?" He then told me that it wasnt a compliment and that my form is bad, my weights are too heavy and I look like im killing myself.


    I thought he was rude. He dosn't work there. I've had a personal trainer for months now who told me my form is perfect and squating is my strong point. She has seen me squating with that much weight and I'm sure she wouldve told me if it was too heavy for my safety. Being a woman its already intimidating enough going to the weights section. I just said ok, I have a personal trainer already and she told me my form is fine, thanks. Then i continued my work out and he was like "sorry if I offended you" I said no, its fine then he continued to annoy me....."you look p****d off".

    Has anyone else had an experience like this? How did you handle it? Do you think its okay to go around giving advice to strangers?

    There's always that one guy! LOL! There's one at my gym. Good thing I am working out with a trainer cause if he came over he'd get a lip lashing from him. My trainer even told me, that's ridiculous! When I train alone I'd put my earbuds in and ignore them. If they insist I would, yell... WHAT? LOL!
  • lynn_glenmontlynn_glenmont Member Posts: 8,362 Member Member Posts: 8,362 Member
    I think the next time it happens, I'm going to take out my phone and turn on the voice recorder, hold it out and ask him to state his name, repeat his advice, and acknowledge that he is liable if I injure myself following his advice.
  • LolinloggenLolinloggen Member Posts: 435 Member Member Posts: 435 Member
    Argh. It happened to me yesterday. And all his advice was good, and it doesn't hurt to be reminded of things you already know by someone who can see that the knowledge in your head isn't showing up in your form, but it is still rude. He didn't say "do you mind if I offer some advice?" He just started in and talked at me through two full sets. He also grabbed the bar and started loading the plates. If I can't get the plates on the bar myself, how does he think I'm going to lift it? I just kept saying thank you without looking at him whenever he paused, but he didn't get the hint.

    I would have said "Thank you for your unsolicited and very unwelcome advice and could you please leave me alone?" I would have also reported it to the gym management that this person is harassing people
  • jdh419jdh419 Member Posts: 54 Member Member Posts: 54 Member
    psychod787 wrote: »
    jdh419 wrote: »
    Dolly989 wrote: »
    Today I was doing barbell squats in my gym when I saw some guy staring at me for awhile but thought I was just being paranoid. He then came over to me to tell me the weight I was squatting with was very heavy. Taking me off guard I just said "um thanks I guess?" He then told me that it wasnt a compliment and that my form is bad, my weights are too heavy and I look like im killing myself.


    I thought he was rude. He dosn't work there. I've had a personal trainer for months now who told me my form is perfect and squating is my strong point. She has seen me squating with that much weight and I'm sure she wouldve told me if it was too heavy for my safety. Being a woman its already intimidating enough going to the weights section. I just said ok, I have a personal trainer already and she told me my form is fine, thanks. Then i continued my work out and he was like "sorry if I offended you" I said no, its fine then he continued to annoy me....."you look p****d off".

    Has anyone else had an experience like this? How did you handle it? Do you think its okay to go around giving advice to strangers?

    There's always that one guy! LOL! There's one at my gym. Good thing I am working out with a trainer cause if he came over he'd get a lip lashing from him. My trainer even told me, that's ridiculous! When I train alone I'd put my earbuds in and ignore them. If they insist I would, yell... WHAT? LOL!

    Or gal....... being an @-hole is not gender specific.......

    Sorry, I didn't mean to insinuate that.
  • allother94allother94 Member Posts: 497 Member Member Posts: 497 Member
    Never happened to me.
    edited January 20
  • psychod787psychod787 Member, Premium Posts: 3,769 Member Member, Premium Posts: 3,769 Member
    jdh419 wrote: »
    psychod787 wrote: »
    jdh419 wrote: »
    Dolly989 wrote: »
    Today I was doing barbell squats in my gym when I saw some guy staring at me for awhile but thought I was just being paranoid. He then came over to me to tell me the weight I was squatting with was very heavy. Taking me off guard I just said "um thanks I guess?" He then told me that it wasnt a compliment and that my form is bad, my weights are too heavy and I look like im killing myself.


    I thought he was rude. He dosn't work there. I've had a personal trainer for months now who told me my form is perfect and squating is my strong point. She has seen me squating with that much weight and I'm sure she wouldve told me if it was too heavy for my safety. Being a woman its already intimidating enough going to the weights section. I just said ok, I have a personal trainer already and she told me my form is fine, thanks. Then i continued my work out and he was like "sorry if I offended you" I said no, its fine then he continued to annoy me....."you look p****d off".

    Has anyone else had an experience like this? How did you handle it? Do you think its okay to go around giving advice to strangers?

    There's always that one guy! LOL! There's one at my gym. Good thing I am working out with a trainer cause if he came over he'd get a lip lashing from him. My trainer even told me, that's ridiculous! When I train alone I'd put my earbuds in and ignore them. If they insist I would, yell... WHAT? LOL!

    Or gal....... being an @-hole is not gender specific.......

    Sorry, I didn't mean to insinuate that.

    No worries.... 2 people obviously think women can't be butt heads as well. I guess I will have to post supporting YouTube videos as evidence... lol
  • jseams1234jseams1234 Member Posts: 1,186 Member Member Posts: 1,186 Member
    jdhcm2006 wrote: »
    I had it happen to me three weeks ago. I had noticed the guy watching me while I was working out, which put me on alert b/c the city I live in is a sex trafficking hub, so I'm a little paranoid.

    He approached me towards the end of my workout and said I was "working hard and doing my thing," but he had a piece of advice. He wanted to tell me an alternative exercise to cable glute kickbacks b/c he commented that they are hard on the back, which I appreciated it b/c the set I had just done was killing my back even though I was following the tutorial properly. I listened to his advice and took it for the last set that I had.

    When I got home, I looked up a tutorial on how to stop them from hurting the back. Now I do them with no issue, but it is nice to have an alternative in my pocket in case the equipment is in use.

    But what I appreciated the most was that once he gave me the advice, he left me alone.

    I’m fairly large and muscular (and male and tattooed and shaved head and RBF’d) so don’t get a lot of people offering me advice when I’m lifting - but occasionally I’m told of an alternate to something I’m doing. Sometimes the alternative is so good it has become my main. I’ve always appreciated this type of advice.
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