So... how come mfp is so quiet now?

lgfrie wrote: »

KrissCanDoThis wrote: »

lgfrie wrote: »

KrissCanDoThis wrote: »

amusedmonkey wrote: »

Speaking for myself. Before this, I had a sort of a routine. I didn't know I had a routine until I lost it. Now my routine is all messed up so are my usual habits (including MFP). I find myself doing other things. I do check in, but less often than I used to.

That I'm currently in weight gain mode doesn't help either (it feels disingenuous to offer advice when I'm trying not even trying). I did fine at first and maintained my weight just fine, but I wasn't ready for how much quarantine cooking everyone in the family would end up doing after a while of being cooped up. It's like they're using cooking to pass time. I had a set of breakfasts and dinners I cycled through and left the bulk of my calories for lunch (often cooked by others and high in calories) and that worked well, now I'm in a novel situation and I don't know what to do with my calories so I just stopped caring. I'm hoping this IDGAF mode won't last long so I can get back to dieting and lose these extra few kilos.

I feel your frustration. Being back here again after losing 165lbs the first time and having gained almost all of it back, makes me feel like a fraud for offering advice to others..

But I also try to tell myself, maybe my words can prevent them from becoming me.. someone who has to put my own advice into practice.

Do you know how or why it happened? There must have been various points during the regain where you saw what was happening and tried to regroup but couldn't for some reason. Yet you must've had tremendous self-discipline and determination to lose the 165 lbs in the first place. What changed? I am extremely interested in hearing more about this if you're up for describing it a little.

@lgfrie

I have binge eating disorder, I've had it since I was a small child, I was over weight my whole life, even as early as 9 and people with binge eating disorder live in a continuous binge and restrict frame of mind, so any efforts to lose weight over my life were met with a binge cycle following it

It took me a long time to find a doctor that would listen to me that it was an issue because I had diabetes too and they were only interested in putting me on insulin and not addressing the underlying issue.

I was finally able to see a psychiatrist at the eating disorder clinic who was able to put me on a medication called vyvanse.

I didnt realize it at the time but the medication was simply prolonging the restrict cycle, which is how I was able to lose the weight, but I didnt even get to transition to maintenance before everything started falling apart

Before I knew it, I was exhibiting habits of bulimia, trying to control what was slipping through my fingers and I was terrified because I kept trying to restrict and restrict more to control things and it just kept snowballing

I was 135, I looked sick, my bones were sticking out, I was so tired all the time I could barely function anymore, and eventually I just ran out of fight and the binge part of the loop returned.

I made a couple of attempts to stop it before it got worse but was unable to succeed.

I'm back on vyvanse now but it's not the same as the first time, its helping tho..

My eating disorder psychiatrist told me that while mfp is good for most people, with someone like me, with an eating disorder, calorie restriction, even tho it's a choice made by me and not a severe one, it's still the same, my brain is allowing me now to have this restriction, and I could get another 2 years but it's just perpetuating the binge and restrict cycle.

So for now... I'm here and doing it because I need some weight off for my health, but he insists that i receive a certain therapy that's designed for people with eating disorders that allows them.to achieve a healthy weight but not seem like I'm purposefully restricting so that it breaks the binge and restrict cycle I'm forever stuck in. I'm just unable to cause covid and insurance isnt going to cover it.

thanks for this detailed answer to my question. I never heard of Vyvanse before and didn't know there was such a thing as a drug for binging behavior. I've been on a good, successful diet for 10 months, but all my previous ones of the 3-4 month, 25-40 lb variety entailed gaining all the weight back and then some, after horrible and I mean insane binging I know I still haven't fully conquered, though I've gotten a lot better at regrouping quickly - like the next day, instead of 4 years later LOL But the tendency is still there, I know I haven't beaten it. I think about that a lot and how fragile this whole diet thing is, even for those who have their "system" down and can opine all day long on what works and what doesn't. It works until it doesn't, is my thinking. It's really a fragile thing. I appreciate your insights.