The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living
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Oh also some sort of muscle cream will help your arm A LOT. In the US we have Bengay and probably some other types. That is what I used. It made a huge difference. Once I started feeling like I had been punched in the arm, I rubbed it in and I would say the pain improved probably 70%.5
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17 days AF. Went for a walk/jog on my lunch break and wellness time, ended up doing 3 mi (my work is located at the top of the hill so there's really no flat spots lol) in 54 min. Still battling the sugar, i went through a whole pint of ice cream the other night. If anyone has any healthy alternatives for the sugar cravings I could sure use the advice!!!lol7
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2 years today, $2926 saved, 292,626 less calories, which equates to about 40lbs lighter and holding. Thanks to everyone here for helping me realize it just wasn't just me who had to slay this dragon. I have learned that you really can't kill it though, just tame it. Peace and joy to all.
Bravo!! hooray!!! 2 years and wishing you many more!!!4 -
@mtngrl3 It's not a healthy alternative to sugar but lollipops help me. I eat them very slowly and usually just 1 fights the craving. Also if you love ice cream there are a lot on the market now that aren't as fattening. Nick's and Halo are 2 that are good.5
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Tonight I picked up take out for dinner. I had to wait 10 minutes outside the restaurant door. Right next door is my favorite wine store!! I stared into the windows like a puppy looking for his mama. I said "you can just get a half bottle ...." Of course I didn't. Nothing has changed. I would fall back into my old habits quickly.
Plus, my vacation is soon and I know if I drank tonight, I would drink and have a hangover for my whole vacation.
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Plus.... my skin is really bright and clear. I sleep very well. No racing heartbeat. No more headaches in the morning. I wake up so grateful to be sober. Nothing beats that feeling! Also, I am finding that I can calm myself down during times of great stress naturally without relying on any substance... I meditate, go for walks, play music, repeat positive mantras and watch youtube inspiration videos.... and sometimes I go to bed a little earlier and call it a day.7
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@mtngrl3 It's not a healthy alternative to sugar but lollipops help me. I eat them very slowly and usually just 1 fights the craving. Also if you love ice cream there are a lot on the market now that aren't as fattening. Nick's and Halo are 2 that are good.
Sounds like a great plan, Jen!4 -
For an unknown reason, I find myself feeling sad, depressed, and hopeless today. There is nothing new...well, maybe the latest mass shootings. That is pretty heavy. I am no longer thinking, "a drink will make me feel better." so I guess that is progress.
Still, I need to find a natural way to ease my tension. It's rainy and gross here so perhaps a walk through the mall will help. I asked my daughter and grand daughters to go with me so that alone should help lift my mood.
I'm wishing you all a peaceful day. ~ Jen5 -
Hi again. I am at day 35 being AF. I use the NOMO app to track. NOMO has a neat feature - as of this morning I have saved $151.74 in bourbon expenses.
A couple of cool things since I have gone AF:- About 3 weeks after going AF, I no longer had to take medicine for high blood pressure. My BP is right at 120-80 or a little less now for the past 2 weeks. BUT - I promptly gained 6 pounds getting off my diuretic BP med...that gain is now over half gone.
- Another heart happy thing. My resting heart rate when I drank was around 75-80 BPM. It is now in the 58-63 BPM range.
The drinker in me is wondering if I drop a few more pounds if can I start drinking "socially" again without getting back on BP meds. But, I really hate taking pills - I will wrestle with that question later. But I think I hate taking pills more than I like drinking.8 -
@BarryTone1 Congrats on your healthy achievements. The "drinker in you" is known to some of us as the wolf waiting patiently in the woods. When we go back in the woods, he is all over us. The only way to avoid the wolf is to stay out of the woods. In other words, the vast majority of drinkers end up drinking exactly as they had done before. Moderation is extremely difficult, though I imagine there are some people successful at it. Most of us here though have tried and failed at that.6
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From my experience only, I believe we all have that inner voice that tells us the straight truth. My little voice for the last few years has been saying, "hmmmmm you drink differently than other people". We all know deep within if we need to take a break from drinking.
Here's another difference I've noticed between me and other casual drinkers: my mom has never ever said she better take a break from drinking, or drink water between wineglasses , wear a bracelet saying "one day at a time", keep track on a AF app, etc. I've seen her order a glass of wine and leave half of it on the table and leave when dinner is over. Me on the other hand, I order 2 glass of wine through the same dinner, wish I could order more but am too embarrassed, go home and open a new bottle of wine and drink a few of those glasses. Big big difference between me and normal drinkers.6 -
@BarryTone1 Congrats on 35 days!! That is a huge accomplishment. I have the Nomo app, too.
I have been using it off and on for three years. I read some entries from my early attempt at sobriety. I sounded so hopeless and sad. I am so hopeful and happy now.
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For an unknown reason, I find myself feeling sad, depressed, and hopeless today. There is nothing new...well, maybe the latest mass shootings. That is pretty heavy. I am no longer thinking, "a drink will make me feel better." so I guess that is progress.
Still, I need to find a natural way to ease my tension. It's rainy and gross here so perhaps a walk through the mall will help. I asked my daughter and grand daughters to go with me so that alone should help lift my mood.
I'm wishing you all a peaceful day. ~ Jen
I think you are an empath. You feel so deeply, Jen. That is a beautiful thing about you but it can be tough on you.4 -
Up_n_Running wrote: »@BarryTone1 Congrats on your healthy achievements. The "drinker in you" is known to some of us as the wolf waiting patiently in the woods. When we go back in the woods, he is all over us. The only way to avoid the wolf is to stay out of the woods. In other words, the vast majority of drinkers end up drinking exactly as they had done before. Moderation is extremely difficult, though I imagine there are some people successful at it. Most of us here though have tried and failed at that.
I don't even like moderate drinking. I'm not interested in 1 glass of wine, or 1 beer.
I want a bottle of wine ! Or several beers. I have a broken 'off switch' for sure. So, I had to just stop drinking altogether. Not worth the emotional devastation I have to go through. Just doesn't agree with me. 👎👎
That was exactly my problem too. Once I started, I didn't want to stop and I kept using it as a way to unwind. It went from a weekend thing to an occasional weeknight thing and in my late 30s, the recovery time was longer. I'm so glad that I cut it all out entirely and it feels good to take control of something where I have absolute control. So much of what we experience in our lives is based on circumstance, fortune, coincidence or just other forms of external influence. But I know that if I don't choose to drink, I won't drink and that is a great feeling.5 -
24 days AF as of today10
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There is a tragedy in my family that happened yesterday like none other. My cousin who is a heroin addict (supposedly in recovery but mentally unstable due to drugs) murdered his young son. This family is being crushed and ripped apart and a precious child suffered so terrible.
Now, our family is forever altered. No one can even function because we are in disbelief. Who could do that to a child? Well, a sick, addicted person did it. And now the family will never be the same for the rest of eternity.
If this doesn't keep me sober, nothing will. I'm sorry to be such a downer; this is affecting me in the worst way.8 -
It didn't have to be this way. We all have a choice. Total devastation beyond all comprehension.
By the way, I have many cousins. This thread has never heard me speak about this man.4 -
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Up_n_Running wrote: »Up_n_Running wrote: »@BarryTone1 Congrats on your healthy achievements. The "drinker in you" is known to some of us as the wolf waiting patiently in the woods. When we go back in the woods, he is all over us. The only way to avoid the wolf is to stay out of the woods. In other words, the vast majority of drinkers end up drinking exactly as they had done before. Moderation is extremely difficult, though I imagine there are some people successful at it. Most of us here though have tried and failed at that.
I don't even like moderate drinking. I'm not interested in 1 glass of wine, or 1 beer.
I want a bottle of wine ! Or several beers. I have a broken 'off switch' for sure. So, I had to just stop drinking altogether. Not worth the emotional devastation I have to go through. Just doesn't agree with me. 👎👎
That was exactly my problem too. Once I started, I didn't want to stop and I kept using it as a way to unwind. It went from a weekend thing to an occasional weeknight thing and in my late 30s, the recovery time was longer. I'm so glad that I cut it all out entirely and it feels good to take control of something where I have absolute control. So much of what we experience in our lives is based on circumstance, fortune, coincidence or just other forms of external influence. But I know that if I don't choose to drink, I won't drink and that is a great feeling.
Same. I was binge drinking most weekends (cos apparently its the 'normal' thing to do....I live in Scotland and we are big drinkers) and yeah, it was sneaking into mid week.
And the hangovers ?!? WOW. I am only 34 and I honestly can't stand even the thought of going through that again. 😫
It is such a con to think that life is enhanced by alcohol, right? I'm so happy we are trying our best to stay sober. Yes, the hangovers were becoming so painful. At my age, they progressed so much over the years. Who want that anymore? I'm proud of you!4 -
Up_n_Running wrote: »@BarryTone1 Congrats on your healthy achievements. The "drinker in you" is known to some of us as the wolf waiting patiently in the woods. When we go back in the woods, he is all over us. The only way to avoid the wolf is to stay out of the woods. In other words, the vast majority of drinkers end up drinking exactly as they had done before. Moderation is extremely difficult, though I imagine there are some people successful at it. Most of us here though have tried and failed at that.
I don't even like moderate drinking. I'm not interested in 1 glass of wine, or 1 beer.
I want a bottle of wine ! Or several beers. I have a broken 'off switch' for sure. So, I had to just stop drinking altogether. Not worth the emotional devastation I have to go through. Just doesn't agree with me. 👎👎
That was exactly my problem too. Once I started, I didn't want to stop and I kept using it as a way to unwind. It went from a weekend thing to an occasional weeknight thing and in my late 30s, the recovery time was longer. I'm so glad that I cut it all out entirely and it feels good to take control of something where I have absolute control. So much of what we experience in our lives is based on circumstance, fortune, coincidence or just other forms of external influence. But I know that if I don't choose to drink, I won't drink and that is a great feeling.
Yes, we are in control of what we do. There is this guy on youtube I used to listen to and he was a sober coach... at the end of each video he'd say "now, keep the alcohol out of your mouth." So true. I'm happy you are in a good place! You deserve it.4 -
Im sorry @RubyRed427. My heart goes out to you and your family. ❤3
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@RubyRed427 My deepest condolences to you and the family. There are no words for this horror that has happened. We all are sending our love and support to you.3
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I was walking on the beach this morning and befriended an adorable 70 year old who was walking 10 miles today - fit as a fiddle. We talked for awhile and she is 32 years sober. It was really meant to be that I walked with her. She is training for a 500 mile walk in Spain. She was as bubbly and positive as anyone I've met. Sober looks good on her! She inspired me.
She said when you get back to your condo - write in the sand near the surf, "I am not a victim. Acceptance is the key to peace" and let the water wash it away....
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Thank you everyone for your love and support; I hear that the boy's mother is 2 years off drugs and is the one who dropped him off to be babysitting by his father. I can't imagine her guilt and horror. She had bad judgment and that cost her her son. I'm sure she Never dreamed this would happen.
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@RubyRed427 You were absolutely destined to meet this earth angel. I wish you peace on what was supposed to be a relaxing vacation which now much be quite a different experience with what has gone on in your family. Sending hugs.4
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Again... it has been a while since I checked in.
I drank last night. I had 3 cognacs and I feel like death today. Like I’m still in bed!!!
I’m really glad it was a bad experience to push me right back on the sober bus!!9 -
@Beka3695 That happens! Move on and look forward to how good you will feel in a few days. That sober bus ride is always available! Just back on.5
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I am really enjoying "Quit like a woman" book. Nothing earth shattering but she focus on mind body connection. Nurturing ourselves and not always everyone else. Women mother everyone but forget to give themselves love, compassion, encouragement....
I like her perspective that some sober programs are geared towards men. She says it's time woman start taking care of ourselves! Let's be little selfish when it comes to figuring out why we drink so we can get passed those triggers.
I know I liked drinking to reward myself for a job well done. She says find substitutions for alcohol - she even says if you have to take a few bubble baths in a day, then do it!! Find alternatives and it will help with cravings.
This weekend I have been on vacation in FLA. I have had to sit at bars to eat because I'm traveling alone and sitting at a table in the middle of a restaurant is so uncomfortable for me. Anyway, I was telling Jen T. that I overheard a bartender say to a lady who sat down. "Hey, you left last night and forgot to pay your bill!!" The lady who sat down was flabbergasted, shocked, looked genuinely surprised. She said "I dont remember that." The bartender said well you did! We ate your food so you dont have to pay for that but you do owe us for the wine you drank.
I watched the lady's face; she was so embarrassed. She said I have no memory of that.
I sat drinking my Coke with a little smile- yes I felt a bit smug that I wasn't in her shoes. ** But I used to be!
Then, she ordered one chardonnay and paid the bill and left.5 -
Upon check in today at my hotel, the concierge offered me a sangria. I said "no thanks"....
Of course, I would have loved one or ten. But there is simply no point anymore. I am 80 percent accepting that I cannot drink every again. But I'll just view it one day at a time.6
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