• Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 23,005 Member
    edited October 2022
    M I'll add daydreamed or/sit quietly and relax.

    That's something I rarely do.

    1. I would likely fall asleep.
    2. I would immediately think of several things I could be doing.

    M in Oz
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 11,159 Member
    PS - She has just arrived. She totalled her car last week, so her BIL had to bring her. She's still a bit shaken and the insurance company are mucking her about.

    Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx
  • minicooper452
    minicooper452 Posts: 591 Member
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 15,206 Member
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,345 Member
    barbiecat wrote: »
    <3Katla, so sorry to hear that you and your DH have another bump on the road to his recovery and his return to the apartment to be with you.

    :) Hooray for me. I finally finished washing to fence. The other small bits of work in the yard to get ready for fall and winter will be fun and easy.

    <3 Welcome T in BC I live on the north Olympic Peninsula in Washington state and have similar beauty and weather to the coastal southern part of BC. I hope you will keep coming back. I live with my husband and one dog. We live where I can walk early in the morning nearly every day of the year.

    <3 Barbie in NW WA

    I second this hooray for getting the fence washed. <3
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,345 Member
    Michelle, Those are all good ideas of how to handle the ashes. <3
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,345 Member
    Heather, I had to look up petrol blue. Sort of a peacock blue. Very pretty.

    Happy Birthday to Johnny!

    Karen in Virginia
  • jam0525
    jam0525 Posts: 1,681 Member
    I'm still around. It has been crazy, which seems to be the way things go recently.

    My mother is still on hospice, but she had an incident at her adult family home which resulted in our having to get her out immediately by ambulance. She ended up in the hospital for almost three days. Adult Protective Services is involved. Thankfully, we have found a new place for her which seems to be so much better. We feel silly that we put her in that first place after all. Just evidence that we didn't know what we were doing.

    I had my right breast reduction done on Tuesday, so I am home this week recovering. Hurts like crazy, but I have lots of meds and am trying to rest.

    Regarding kids not talking to parents:
    I think parents know why their kids aren't talking to them, if they stop and think about it, but based on my own husband and mother, parents don't always want to be very self aware. I went a couple years not talking to my mother because my niece, whom my mother raised, had an affair with my first husband which resulted in our divorce. I tried to maintain a relationship with my mother, but she blamed me and my ex-husband, and didn't believe my niece had any responsibility at all. I was trying to protect myself, so I told her one day, I think it is best that we don't talk for a while. I think she's still in denial that I had to call off communication because she wasn't going to be there for me during the absolutely worst time of my life.

    My 16 year old is not really talking to my husband any more, or very little, and my husband doesn't know why. Not very self-aware, in my opinion, because I know exactly why he's not talking to him, even without asking. My husband is too critical and sometimes even a little manipulative. My son has enough self-respect to not put up with it. So he avoids being alone with my husband and when they are, according to my husband, my son doesn't say a word to him. Why would he when whatever he says is going to be met with sarcasm or criticism.

    Kids don't just stop talking to their parents/family for no reason whatsoever. It may not be a good reason, or it may be a very good reason. We just need to be more self aware in our relationships with our children. I have had to apologize so many times to my kids for stupid things I've said or done. I do have a pretty good relationship with all three of them, but my oldest and middle son are very careful what they share with me. They rarely ever just chat. My middle son communicates with me if something has gone wrong or if something wonderful has happened. They don't really communicate with my husband, who is not their father, because he tries to give too much "advice." It's not always helpful or constructive.

    Willamette Valley, OR

  • dlfk202000
    dlfk202000 Posts: 2,209 Member
    Machka9 wrote: »
    Here's where I am this month with walking. :)


    Machka in Oz

    not sure the # in kilometers but I am at 92 miles so far for this month. 167 for Sept.170 in Aug.
    Looking forward to talking with the wellness coach this afternoon to see what I need to do different to loose some weight(plus get my other numbers down too)

    Almost time to head out to walk another 5miles plus Zumba tonight. My friend that took me to my first class but then stopped going to go to another gym, is now back going with me. It is just once a week now that it gets too dark to do it in the park at 6:30PM but her and I or another friend and I walk for that hour instead. This week we won't as the teacher is having everyone meet for a little get together at a Mexican place a couple blocks away. I will walk a little extra that day ;) -street tacos are what I will be having that night.
  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,442 Member
    jam0525 wrote: »
    Oregon mom,
    I respectfully disagree concerning your comments about parents knowing why children don’t talk to them. After a year of family counseling with my daughter the therapist called it quits because my daughter has no reason not to talk to me as far as she could say. The counselor felt my daughter was just going to counseling to make me spend my money and really has no justifiable reason to say the things that she does.

    My daughter also spreads lies about me in a club we both belong to.

    According to her I’m upset because I had to pay $4000 out of pocket for her to do a semester abroad in Scotland and trying to not pay for her college loans as promised and as part of the divorce. My belated ex-husband got out of paying anything and I got saddled with the loans.

    The reality is her college is completely and totally paid for each semester at a time for all the semesters I was in charge of the FASFA and the financial paperwork. The $40,000 we ended up with in loans are from the semesters where she and her father got mad at me and cut me out from everything and they screwed up the paperwork.

    So here I am paying off $40,000 in debt that I had nothing to do with. The $20,000 for that semester and Scotland will be paid off by the end of the year.

    Yes my daughter thinks I have a bad attitude towards the debt. I do and as the counselor told her I have a right to because the debt was incurred by her father and her and not by me and I have paid $309 a month every month except for 1 when I did not know the payment was suspended due to COVID.

    I reflected on this many times and there is really no reason for her behavior. But she is an adult and if she doesn’t wanna have anything to do with me that’s up to her. The debts in my name as co-signatures and in my bursar account so she went to the University where I worked, so I’m paying it off.

    Jeannie in Edgewood New Mexico

    I understand. You do know the reason. Whether it's justified or not is a completely different issue.

    I wasn't trying to say that kids always have a good, understandable reason, certainly they don't. I realized after I posted that I didn't make that clear. But as parents, I think we do know their reasons, even if we disagree with them and think they are unfair.

    Willamette Valley OR
  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,442 Member
    kevrit wrote: »
    Question.. anyone sweat for no reason even though you are way past menopause? I’m 66 and can go from shivering to sweating by just putting on a light sweater! Weird….


    Yep. But I'm on crazy drugs, so I don't know if that's the reason.

    Willamette Valley OR
  • fanncy0626
    fanncy0626 Posts: 6,720 Member
    Flea We have no idea why my husband's daughter is not talking to us.

    💕 Mary from Arizona/Minnesota
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 15,206 Member
  • SophieRosieMom
    SophieRosieMom Posts: 2,744 Member
    kevrit wrote: »
    Question.. anyone sweat for no reason even though you are way past menopause? I’m 66 and can go from shivering to sweating by just putting on a light sweater! Weird….


    Rita - ME too! I have a very narrow temperature comfort range. Seems like anything below 63, I'm freezing. Above 68, I'm roasting.

    Weatherman says smoky and unsafe air is now to continue thru Thursday. Then Friday... here comes the rain unless they change their minds.

    I purchased a little air compressor/tire inflator off Amazon. I got the el cheapo, and it was kind of a "challenge" but managed to get the tires on DH's 2006 Camry inflated up to proper level yesterday without too much "blue" air spewing out of the garage, lol.

    If I traveled any distance at all I would have gotten a more high quality compressor like Karen has shown us in the past. I'll still stick this one in the trunk anyhow.

    I'm taking the car in to Les Schwab tire store early Thursday morning and have them take a look. Sitting semi-flat for over a year can't have been good for them, but they are holding air. Still, not sure that I trust them. Then I'll get the oil changed and it should be a good little back-up car in case the Subaru gets sidelined.

    Jeannie - I've heard similar stories. So sorry you are stuck with paying these loans. If you want, I can send a virtual cast iron frying pan aimed at your ex-husband's head. Just for the fun of it. :p

    Heather - what a nice party! Happy Birthday to your DH, he looks like he's having a great time. What a cute photo of younger you! And of course you have matured beautifully.

    Barbie - good job getting the fence finished. I liked the "bone meal" idea.

    Katla - sorry to hear about the illness in your husband's facility and quarantine. Sounds like he's in a good place to weather it, they'll take good care of him. :) Hope he can join you soon.

    Lanette B)
    SW WA State