WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR OCTOBER 2022
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Gg0
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Morning ladies
Tom has 3 dogs and a cat cremated and Homer will be 4 buried with him,he doesn't want to be cremated
I will be cremated and hopefully sprinkled at the Cape,up at the Beach near our cottage and down at Ding Darling Wildlife Refuge..
But we shall see..
My dad we had cremated and I had him here with me for a year and then we buried him with my mom around what would have been his 90th birthday at the veterans cemetery.
I have all the good intentions of doing things today.. but doing them we shall see.2 -
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OMG! Lisa, that AWESOME!!! I just took the time to read your obit! Truly awesome. Entirely missed it yesterday. Mine is nowhere near and colorful nor exciting. So Lisa, what are the titles of your books? Are they on Amazon?
Oh thank God, Heather! Yes, happens here too. Grrrrrrrrr...
That's Freddy too, Barbie! He doesn't want ANYTHING done after he dies. No funeral, no party, no gathering, no event of any kind. Don't know how the girls are going to feel about that. I don't care much. Of course, I'll need "support" if he goes first. I'll be absolutely LOST without him. He's my rock. But an event. I don't need that part. I really always figured he'd want to go out on a firetruck, but he said no. We was a voluteer for 25 years.
I know about environmental restrictions too M! But we saved Grandpa's ashes and when Gram died we took the pontoon out and scattered them both on their/our lake. It was really quite amazing. Their was a single loon following the boat as we were scattering them in all their favorite spots and then, as we got finished, the mate showed up.
The other thing you could do, Karen, is have something created with a very small amount of the cremains. They do such wonderful things with those now. Our daughter has a very small charm for her bracelet with some of Shawn's ashes. It's a little heart. Just a thought. And she didn't do that until a year after he died. She wasn't ready. But the mortician came to the house and professionally reopened the box and took a tiny bit for each of the family members who wanted some and packaged them and sealed them and then resealed the box. It was all so sweet.
Now off to watch my Vikings win again... I hope!!!
Love and Blessings, Carla, in MN
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Carol - I can never get over how much your grandchildren look like you. Lovely photos. Now they are getting older, do they still interact with you as much? It's something DH and I wonder about. We hope ours will still have time for us, but I'm sure it won't be the same.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx1 -
Mary- got the message and sent one back..
Tracy and the family are doing family pictures today0 -
Ok ladies, here's the clever obit I mentioned earlier. At least I thought it was clever. Northern Indiana sense of humor. Enjoy.
https://www.mishlerfuneralhomes.com/obituary/merle-sarber
Lanette
SW WA State0 -
Regarding death ... it doesn't really matter what I want. I won't be there!! What happens to my body will be up to the hospital or staff in the care home, I presume.
If I follow in the footsteps of my grandparents, I'll outlive everyone I know.
M in Oz
Just like you, I specified cremation in my living will, but after I am dead, who cares?
RvRita1 -
I have to laugh at this because I must admit that I have the cremains of a couple of family members and a few pets here in the house...
[/quote]
It's a tradition I've never understood.
I'm pretty sure there have been people in my family who have been cremated, but their little box has been buried in a cemetery with a headstone and all ... or they've been scattered.
I like the idea of scattering but I know there are environmental restrictions against that.
M in Oz[/quote]
my mother in law has my brother in law's ashes on the filing cabinet next to the chair she sits/sleeps in.
For a long time she had fresh flowers by it. Now there is a glass of water- never noticed it before really until dh was going over there after her fall. Part of the morning routine that he HAD to do was put a fresh glass of ICE water next to Albert's ashes- I have no idea why she does it.
My comment to dh when she was really getting on my nerves, "Why, does she think he needs it because it is so hot where he is now?"
We have the ashes of two dogs and two cats- dh's choice. My first cat I just buried at my parents place when she died. Maybe when he passes, I will bury all the pets with him.
Debbie
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KetoneKaren wrote: »Lisa, Yes, I think for now, I will just keep Joy's ashes. They are in a small very beautiful pink ivory wood urn-like box I found at a craft show, made by a wood artisan. The lid fits tightly and the ashes are very secure. Since the amount of ashes was small the box is about the size of a grapefruit, not large at all. I'll post a picture of it later. You are right. No need to let go of those ashes until/unless I am ready.
Karen in Virginia
my dad's ashes are in a birdhouse that he built. That was a suggestion that came from the lady at the mortuary. Instead of pushing for mom to buy some elaborate thing she knew about dad's love for the birds and building birdhouses. Mom took one in and they put him in it. It sits on mom's desk. She had talked about burying him on the property next to her sister, brother in law and nephew who are all buried there. She almost did when my nephews were there but my sister and I weren't- I would have been so hurt if she had but they ran out of time, thankfully. She is glad too. She is happy having him there, Adds a little holiday decorations on it .2 -
Karen I love that idea,
Hence the Ding Darling Wildlife Refuge.. poor place got decimated by Ian but slowly birds and animals returning..driving down wildlife drive with every type of bird you could imagine out there is my idea of heaven..
Don't know if my daughter will take some of my ashes there or not. But it is one of my wishes.
I have a beautiful window bird feeder that is in my storage area that I can't put up here,because of the HOA.. darn it..0 -
Allie, My spouse and I would both be very happy to have our remains scattered at Ding Darling. Like you, Sanibel is our favorite place in the world.
Karen in Virginia1 -
All of my "death" wishes are in a document I call "Dead Mom's Party". It has a music set list, food, drinks, and party atmosphere suggestions, instructions on who is NOT to eulogize me and that no one is to preach to anyone about anything religious. I have sent it to my children and husband. My kids have read it and think I am weird/funny. My husband is appalled. I haven't written my own obit, but that is very tempting. I am a sweet person; but I don't want people to over look the salty and spicy side to me. Standard obits tend to be bland. Hmmmm...sounds like a recipe. Sweet and Spicy salted Kelly. lol I would like anything usable on my body donated to medicine (organ donation first, science donation second). If neither is viable option, I want to be cremated with ashes disposed of. I don't care where. They can even throw them out. I just do not want them sitting on a shelf or in a box in the closet. I am not my ashes. I will not be offended if they flush me down the toilet or throw be in the dumpster behind my favorite chinese restaurant. My husband, being the good catholic that he is, wanted to be buried; HOWEVER after burying his mom and seeing the cost of funeral, burial, stone; he has opted for cremation. Whew! I would probably need to sell the house to afford a funeral with trimmings.5
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I still have the feeling that this phase of my life is a temporary interlude. So that I can't really make a plan until I know more about what happens next. When my parents pass, will I move? Will I meet a guy? Make close friends? Who knows? I'm 60, so there's probably time for change.
I sort of lost my daughter in the divorce; she hasn't spoken to me or returned my texts for several years now. So there's not much point in my keeping things, yet there are things I care about. There's a lot of my handmade stuff that will likely be trashed when I go, and that hurts. But I don't really care what happens to my body. There isn't anybody who would carry out my wishes, so there's no point in writing them out. I keep meaning to make a will, but I don't really care who gets my stuff. It's likely to be sold or trashed anyway.
Annie in Delaware
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Much of my outlook on death has to do with surviving my mother's death in 1999 and the two years after, where suicidal thoughts stalked what seemed like every waking moment. While I genuinely don't want to lose someone I dearly love, I don't fear it anymore.
Doesn't mean I won't grieve... but two years after my mother's death, I went to visit her grave, along with my sis and her daughters. I stood there, just as empty as before, and realized she wasn't there. She had never been there. Her eyes tight shut, she left with the last words she said to me, "That's it, it's a tunnel!" with her hands out in front of her as if parting a curtain. I couldn't accompany her on that journey, no matter how badly I wanted to go with her.
There was something about knowing that wasn't her in that box in the ground that let me finally start breathing again. I don't pretend to explain it. I think our minds protect us as much as they can until we can swim back to something resembling sanity, but all that is just speculation.
Still, I miss her.
Love y'all,
Later,
Lisa in AR
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Lisa, So poignant. Your sister and nieces are dead, too? That's a lot of loss...1
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Sorry - that got more morose than I intended! Just to prove that life as we know it never stands still... we finally got that life-giving rain last night, but it brought with it winds that took down yet another large branch:
Corey's already cut half of it up to drag away for firewood and/or the brushpile. Barely brushed the fence - once again, we got really lucky.
Later, y'all,
Love,
Lisa8 -
Lisa ~ From what you have told us about your mom, I am sure that she believed that "to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord."
Lovely view from your porch but sorry the tree branch fell.
Carol in GA3 -
Sooooo
My SIL bought Tracy a Dyson stick vacuum for an early Christmas present.. Ginger there Australian Shepherd fluffs fur everywhere.. and honestly I think poor Miles is allergic because he is always rubbing his eyes and nose..
So far today Kyle has vacuumed 5 times lol
Kyle's birthday is Tuesday and I asked Tracy are you sure he bought it for you,but hey if he is doing the vacuuming for you.. there you go .. what a riot... and you can see Miles is watching Daddy do the vacuuming..lol
Tracy is going to cut this pumpkin and sit Miles in it.. but thought this was a cute picture.8 -
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I hope that DH will be able come back to our apartment soon. I am keeping my fingers crossed for him to join me. I think he may be here soon, maybe even today. 🤞🏻 🤞🏻4
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KetoneKaren wrote: »Lisa, So poignant. Your sister and nieces are dead, too? That's a lot of loss...
No, no, no! I'm sorry, I must have phrased that awkwardly. My sister and nieces are very much alive. We had stopped to see Mama's grave on the way home from a different family funeral.
In fact, I spoke to my sis yesterday, and she was calling to let me know the youngest (25) had moved into the house her boyfriend bought for her... They've been on again/off again, but it's hard to resist a whole house, I guess.
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grandmallie wrote: »
Sooooo
My SIL bought Tracy a Dyson stick vacuum for an early Christmas present.. Ginger there Australian Shepherd fluffs fur everywhere.. and honestly I think poor Miles is allergic because he is always rubbing his eyes and nose..
So far today Kyle has vacuumed 5 times lol
Kyle's birthday is Tuesday and I asked Tracy are you sure he bought it for you,but hey if he is doing the vacuuming for you.. there you go .. what a riot... and you can see Miles is watching Daddy do the vacuuming..lol
Tracy is going to cut this pumpkin and sit Miles in it.. but thought this was a cute picture.
vacuuming is one of the very few chores my dh does and he is obsessed with it- we have them all over. I love not having to vacuum hardly ever BUT not thrilled with the times he chooses to vacuum(it is a minimum 2-3 times a day in some area, including in the bathroom where the litter boxes are). Not found of him doing the bathroom one while I am trying to sleep or the regular ones while I am on the phone to my mom or watching tv. Mom, jokes about it and I can always pause the tv until he is done, but some days it just irritates me. Trying to not let it bother me so much.
Sitting here at my computer, I can see three vacuums right from here- lined up in the hallway. The shopvac in the bathroom. Not going to count the ones in the garage- there are at least 3-4 there I am sure. He must have moved a few to the garage because I didn't see any in the bedroom this time- he used to have them up against the door so I had to move two or three just to close the door so his light/noise from his room didn't disturb me when I was trying to sleep- Every time I move stuff, he seems to find more stuff to put there.
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my walking friend took her husband's ashes to a beach theybboth loved. It required hours of driving and a night in a hotel. She brought some of the ashes home and when the landscaper was putting dirt around the tree she was planting in her husband's memory, she tossed in the ashes. The landscaper said "Is that bone meal for the tree?" And she said "Sort of"
Barbie6 -
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I just watched Bill Engvalls skit on medical Marijuana.. oh lord,he is a riot I was laughing so hard.. Im so sad he is retiring.. he is one of my favorites..4
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Fit2btied2016 wrote: »Got my jersey for raising 1k for MS in the mail. They also sent me my medal! They are different this year, I like it!
Hi! I was intrigued by your jersey and the name of Deception Pass, and thought it looked like WA (I'm up in BC), so I am so glad that I looked it up. WOW! Gorgeous scenery, and definitely a place I want to add to our "to visit/camp in" list! (So many places in WA still to visit, ha, ha). Thanks for posting, and congrats on your successful bike event!
Cheers, T.
It is a very scenic bike route. Pretty hilly in a lot of places. I did the virtual ride here in California. Didn’t make the trip to Washington to do the ride. It’s really a fun time
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Welcome, T from BC!
Lisa, - Silly me, I went back and re-read your post. Not sure how I got that your sister and nieces were dead - it didn't compute the same when I re-read it. lol
Karen in Virginia0
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