breastfeeding in public
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Following the logic that a breast is a "private", "sexual" body part I find it offensive and downright creepy to see people openly feeding babies in public out of a fake breast (bottle). I have never seen an exposed nipple when I have encountered public breastfeeding, however, people display these plastic boob replicas with reckless abandon! This breastfeeding Mom feels uncomfortable being exposed to this "dirty", private apparatus! Please be discreet and throw a blanket over your kid suckling these fake breasts, or better yet, hide in shame in a bathroom stall. Thank You!
It's also phallic-shaped! Gasp! I'm terribly offended, put it away before the children are scarred! There can be no reference to anything sexual at all, and everyone knows breasts are only for sex!0 -
No. For one thing, as has been said over and over in this thread, if you are out with your baby it is not always possible to find a private place even if you wanted one and a mom shouldn't have to be a shut-in. And second, lots and lots, and lots and lots, of people aren't bothered by public breastfeeding. So it's absolutely not more comfortable for everyone, only for some who have issues being the nursing moms in public because they are embarrassed/feel it is a private "function" that they don't want others to see or for those who attach weird attitudes to seeing a woman breastfeed. It is simply not more comfortable for everyone. And how does being in public keep you from being close with your baby?
So you have NO preference as to public or private breastfeeding? For some reason, I doubt that. And leaving a social situation for twenty minutes does not make you a shut-in or a recluse. I leave social situations for while to talk on the phone, fix my hair or makeup, talk privately with a friend, go to the bathroom, etc, and I don't miss much.
And by getting close I mean in a quiet situation, instead of a store where there is a lot of hustle-and-bustle. If mothers breastfeed because it's so "beautiful" why are they doing it in the middle of a store?
OMG every body gets offended, only narrow minded people get offended. We get your not going to breast feed horray for you....
The reason I keep reiterating this is because not every goes back and reads EVERY post on this page. So for those who don't watch so closely, I just repeat my general points I'm terribly sorry if you don't agree with my points of view or how often I repeat them.
Your point of view on this is harmful... you are so young to be so narrow minded.. I hope you grow out of it.0 -
No. For one thing, as has been said over and over in this thread, if you are out with your baby it is not always possible to find a private place even if you wanted one and a mom shouldn't have to be a shut-in. And second, lots and lots, and lots and lots, of people aren't bothered by public breastfeeding. So it's absolutely not more comfortable for everyone, only for some who have issues being the nursing moms in public because they are embarrassed/feel it is a private "function" that they don't want others to see or for those who attach weird attitudes to seeing a woman breastfeed. It is simply not more comfortable for everyone. And how does being in public keep you from being close with your baby?
So you have NO preference as to public or private breastfeeding? For some reason, I doubt that. And leaving a social situation for twenty minutes does not make you a shut-in or a recluse. I leave social situations for while to talk on the phone, fix my hair or makeup, talk privately with a friend, go to the bathroom, etc, and I don't miss much.
And by getting close I mean in a quiet situation, instead of a store where there is a lot of hustle-and-bustle. If mothers breastfeed because it's so "beautiful" why are they doing it in the middle of a store?
Leaving a social situation is easy. I'd do that regularly. Leaving a store when you have a cart with milk and frozen foods and you should have had dinner in the oven already and older kid is getting cranky because it's coming up on naptime and baby wants to be fed NOW is not so easy.
Breastfeeding is beautiful. It's also necessary if you are a BFing mother. I think it's equally beautiful to have a nice sit down dinner with my family around the dining room table. That doesn't mean we haven't scarfed down burgers in the car every once in a while.0 -
Someone help me out here.
I can't seem to find the "Make this f--king thread stop already" button!0 -
As a breast-feeding mother, I don't like to feed my baby in public. I'll either feed him before we leave or in my car parked far away from other cars (with a blanket). I don't want people staring at me. To every other mother that chooses to feed in public....*claps hands* You're brave.0
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there I totally agree.Maybe it's because I have BF in public approximately 800 times, in restaraunts, malls, zoos and the like all over the midwest, and no one has ever said anything but "oh, so sweet!" to me... And the women I've known who have people take issue with them are the ones who do things like sit on the floor in a Target, essentially daring someone to make it a news story.
These types of things have to be handled delicately. If a woman wants to show a little more than is necessary, yeah, probably looking to make a point, but most women don't do that and if there's some flash of nipple because the baby gets distracted and moves its head away or something (or as was mentioned if a mom is at the beach and wearing only a bathing suit - situations like that), people really need to get over it. The small number who might make a scene shouldn't be public breastfeeding opponents' focus, but they always will be. And in a situation like this, an employee isn't always going to say the right thing, just not possible, but had the mom been asked to move because it's an issue of safety, she really couldn't have made a logical argument to that. Asking her to go to a dressing room is violating the law and opening the door for such protests.
and this is why, despite an earlier poster's suggestion that we snip posts when quoting, I like to leave it all there.... The quotes above came about after a few posters (i believe you? Not positive) called another poster selfish for choosing not to BF, right? Not about delaying feeding, different issue, unless I'm just not following your meaning, in which case let me know.
I am sooooooo selfish, then. LOL But my 3 girls are happy, smart, growing well, no complaints. I guess wanting to do anything for yourself makes you selfish. So I think I'll continue not being a martyr, because my goal is good kids, not impressing self-righteous strangers on the internet.
I never said anyone had to be a martyr. Hell, I'm certainly not one myself. I've got 4 kids, all of whom I chose to breastfeed, exclusively and for longer than the average, but I never sat around saying "Woe is me, I can't go out tonight because my children are tying me down." There are ways to work around it, obviously. However, in the grand scheme of things, breastfeeding your baby is such a short time in their life (especially with the rates you have in the States) that a woman should see it as something she is doing FOR her child, not because she HAS to.
When you have kids, their needs and wants should be met first, especially in the newborn/infant stage. They don't understand delayed gratification. Geez, my 8 year old still doesn't understand delayed gratification. But as an adult, you should be able to say, "Gee, I guess I'll do that later because my baby needs me now."
The selfish talk is in regards to some posters being so certain that they know the right answer for all other families, and that this other poster, a future mom & nurse, is selfish for thinking about *her* needs, and deciding if BFing would be right for her. Just, wow. You must be 57 shades of absolute perfection to really think it's YOUR place to make that decision for another mom.
I BF my kids for long enough to earn your stamp of approval, I presume, but any other parenting decisions you need to tell me how I should feel about? How about working moms? How *should* I feel about them? I *should* want to cloth diaper, being such a short time, or not?
It's just not up to you how she feels or*should* feel about something like this.0 -
So you have NO preference as to public or private breastfeeding? For some reason, I doubt that. And leaving a social situation for twenty minutes does not make you a shut-in or a recluse. I leave social situations for while to talk on the phone, fix my hair or makeup, talk privately with a friend, go to the bathroom, etc, and I don't miss much.
And by getting close I mean in a quiet situation, instead of a store where there is a lot of hustle-and-bustle. If mothers breastfeed because it's so "beautiful" why are they doing it in the middle of a store?
Really? You doubt that? Maybe you haven't read all the posts, but in a much earlier post I mentioned how my brother and I were raised in a way in which the human body was not hidden. We saw women's breasts while they were sunbathing, or in the sauna, or breastfeeding. They were not hidden and shameful. Of course, the kids also ran around nude while swimming - gasp - oh my god - better call CPS. We are not scarred, nor are the billions of other people in the world brought up that way. So, yeah, public breastfeeding doesn't bother me.0 -
mistaken quote!0
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Your point of view on this is harmful... you are so young to be so narrow minded.. I hope you grow out of it.
I wouldn't say it's harmful. I would encourage people to breastfeed, and when I'm a nurse, I will encourage people to choose that. But if they don't want to make that choice, it is not my place to make them feel like less of a mother or woman because of it. I am also not narrow-minded because I don't want to see it in public. For me, it's nudity, plain and simple. I don't want to see it in my public, regardless of whether it is a woman in a tiny bikini strutting her stuff on the beach, or a mom breastfeeding in public, or a man in a speedo that covers nothing. I understand BF isn't "nudity" under many laws, but for me, I consider it an act of nudity that I don't want to see IN PUBLIC. If you wanna be naked in your house, or your own property, by all means, please do it!
I also don't think I'm narrow-minded.
After all, I have read all 27 pages of this discussion AND I was the one who started it. Like I said before (sorry if this bothers you, as I'm repeating something I said earlier), I love debates. I could sit here all night and debate this with all of you. Debating is my nature. I can debate til I pass out from not talking!!0 -
Since this website is about healthy eating and lifestyle....I would rather discuss the benefits and even more the lasting benefits to breastfeeding!0
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what's all the fuss about? trying to see the original post that started all this but can't seem to navigate my way there...0
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what's all the fuss about? trying to see the original post that started all this but can't seem to navigate my way there...
If you go to the first page of this thread, at the top of the first post, you should be able to click back to the last thread. It's in tiny font though. It says something like "continued from last topic" and you can click on "last topic." And be prepared...it's like 20 pages!0 -
Your point of view on this is harmful... you are so young to be so narrow minded.. I hope you grow out of it.
I wouldn't say it's harmful. I would encourage people to breastfeed, and when I'm a nurse, I will encourage people to choose that. But if they don't want to make that choice, it is not my place to make them feel like less of a mother or woman because of it. I am also not narrow-minded because I don't want to see it in public. For me, it's nudity, plain and simple. I don't want to see it in my public, regardless of whether it is a woman in a tiny bikini strutting her stuff on the beach, or a mom breastfeeding in public, or a man in a speedo that covers nothing. I understand BF isn't "nudity" under many laws, but for me, I consider it an act of nudity that I don't want to see IN PUBLIC. If you wanna be naked in your house, or your own property, by all means, please do it!
I also don't think I'm narrow-minded.
After all, I have read all 27 pages of this discussion AND I was the one who started it. Like I said before (sorry if this bothers you, as I'm repeating something I said earlier), I love debates. I could sit here all night and debate this with all of you. Debating is my nature. I can debate til I pass out from not talking!!
I agree with the other poster. It's strange how so many in this thread who are opposed to public breastfeeding are younger. I'm so, so sorry for you that you are not more comfortable with the human body and especially breastfeeding. If you consider so many things nudity and are offended by them, you're going to spend an awful lot of your time out in the world offended.0 -
what's all the fuss about? trying to see the original post that started all this but can't seem to navigate my way there...
It got shut down... the poster read a article on breastfeeding in public... it offends her..0 -
I am a Student Midwife AND a mother. I never remember breastfeeding in public other than in mothers lounges which are like a big change room cubicle you'd see in a clothing store as I felt uncomfortable (probably due to my age at the time) but I don't think it's right that people should be made to feel like that by prudish, ridiculous people and absolutely love seeing mothers breast feed. If I had another child I probably would breastfeed in public, on the discreet side.
We were made to feed our children with our breasts, if not we'd have adapted through mutation etc over the years not to have them at all.
The problem in today's society is that breasts are sensualised and sexualised to make us feel all hot and steamy about them but in reality they are there for one purpose only. To feed your young.
Breastfeeding has NOTHING to do with sex.
If you want to wrap your children in cotton wool then go ahead, that's your prerogative, but don't dare make breastfeeding mothers and babies ashamed to do so.
You can be sure that if you say anything to a breastfeeding mother, me, or someone like me will be there to overhear, turn around and tell you to go to hell, mind your own business and let the baby/child feed!!0 -
I agree with the other poster. It's strange how so many in this thread who are opposed to public breastfeeding are younger. I'm so, so sorry for you that you are not more comfortable with the human body and especially breastfeeding. If you consider so many things nudity and are offended by them, you're going to spend an awful lot of your time out in the world offended.
It is interesting that many of us our younger. Not sure what it says about our beliefs or our generation.I'm pretty comfortable with the human body. I've had a few patients at the hospitals I've had clinical at, and felt really comfortable with them. I even did a shift on the postpartum wing, where I got to see some mothers learning to breastfeed. That was definitely neat to get to see that up close for the first time, but as I've said before, I don't feel the need to see it out in public or in a different context that the hospital setting.
And I'm not really offended in the world too much. Only a little in the gym locker room mostly! I think the majority of people I see are pretty modest.0 -
Are you also offended when you see a calf suckling at it's mothers teats? Grow up!0
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what's all the fuss about? trying to see the original post that started all this but can't seem to navigate my way there...
It got shut down... the poster read a article on breastfeeding in public... it offends her..
The original post did not get shut down. The thread got filled so it moved here. I just managed to click back and read my original post so it's all there to read!Are you also offended when you see a calf suckling at it's mothers teats? Grow up!
Cows aren't human so that's another matter!
Interestingly enough, Kasey Kahne recently came under fire for two tweets he tweeted about the subject: http://offthebench.nbcsports.com/2011/12/28/nascars-kasey-kahne-goes-on-twitter-rant-after-seeing-woman-breastfeeding/
I'm glad he feels the same way as me lol! Glad I'm not crazy lol.0 -
No. For one thing, as has been said over and over in this thread, if you are out with your baby it is not always possible to find a private place even if you wanted one and a mom shouldn't have to be a shut-in. And second, lots and lots, and lots and lots, of people aren't bothered by public breastfeeding. So it's absolutely not more comfortable for everyone, only for some who have issues being the nursing moms in public because they are embarrassed/feel it is a private "function" that they don't want others to see or for those who attach weird attitudes to seeing a woman breastfeed. It is simply not more comfortable for everyone. And how does being in public keep you from being close with your baby?
So you have NO preference as to public or private breastfeeding? For some reason, I doubt that. And leaving a social situation for twenty minutes does not make you a shut-in or a recluse. I leave social situations for while to talk on the phone, fix my hair or makeup, talk privately with a friend, go to the bathroom, etc, and I don't miss much.
And by getting close I mean in a quiet situation, instead of a store where there is a lot of hustle-and-bustle. If mothers breastfeed because it's so "beautiful" why are they doing it in the middle of a store?
OMG every body gets offended, only narrow minded people get offended. We get your not going to breast feed horray for you....
The reason I keep reiterating this is because not every goes back and reads EVERY post on this page. So for those who don't watch so closely, I just repeat my general points I'm terribly sorry if you don't agree with my points of view or how often I repeat them.
Your point of view on this is harmful... you are so young to be so narrow minded.. I hope you grow out of it.
BS! There is nothing harmful or narrow minded about her point of view. Especially considering that she appears to be miles more open minded to differing views than you are. How many times must she state that she is not against breast feeding and supports before her overall view is deemed acceptable? Not once has the OP told anyone they were wrong for their opinion on this topic, but the OP has been repeatedly slammed, insulted, and told to not become a mother. Simply because her choices are different. What is truly harmful is the intolerance shown to those with differing/unpopular opinions.0 -
i still cant believe that someone compared a sexual act to feeding a baby...some people need to grow up...i breast feed my son...going on almost a year and when i do it in public, i cover up but thats my choice...women have been breast feeding babies for thousands of years..if it werent for boobies we all wouldnt be here right now:) idk when formula was invented and i dont care but you gotta think how were we all feed 100 years ago? mama's boobies. and it lowers your risk for breast cancer. AND breastfeeding has helped me lose 117 lbs because it burns so many calories. its all around awesome in my opinion0
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Breast feeding, public or not, is natural. Sometimes awkward, but hey, when baby is hungry, would you rather have screaming baby or happy baby? Imagine how you would feel if you weren't allowed to eat in public!0
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As a child, I was felt it was a deep injustice that on hot summer days boys could walk around with no shirts on and I had to wear one because I was a girl. In fact, I still feel that way. My breasts are part of my body, and they aren't a sex organ. Other than hurting like hell if I run without a bra on, I see little reason to keep them concealed in public at all.
But the sad reality of the world is that I have to wear a shirt in public most of the time and have to deal with the boob sweat and bra chaffing of summer. I have to feel apprehensive at the thought of eventually breast feeding in public when I have a child. I have to listen to the morality police tell me my body is something that should be covered at all times, though boys bodies are just fine to show off. I have to listen to police officers warn me about dressing too provocatively in response to a recent streak of rapes in my neighborhood (true story, I was wearing a crew cut tshirt at the time btw).
I have to do all of these things because people are afraid of a little tit. Get over it, especially when it's feeding a baby. For real. The only way to truly desexualize a boob is to make it common place, as common place as a boy's bare chest. I mean, they played soccer that way at my school during practice, shirts v skins, but girls had to play red v blue with those awkward net things. The best way to start that process is in allowing children to see boobs being used for what they were designed for, feeding children. If the only way you see them is on prominent display while covered up, how else are you going to think of them?0 -
The good thing about all this is that, no matter what other people's OPINIONS are on this matter, the vast majority of states have laws in place that supercede all of them. Almost all states allow a mother to BF wherever they and children are otherwise allowed to be. Period.0
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Okay let me ask you a question... what is it that makes you feel uncomfortable when a mother is breastfeeding her child in public? How many times have you see it?0
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BS! There is nothing harmful or narrow minded about her point of view. Especially considering that she appears to be miles more open minded to differing views than you are. How many times must she state that she is not against breast feeding and supports before her overall view is deemed acceptable? Not once has the OP told anyone they were wrong for their opinion on this topic, but the OP has been repeatedly slammed, insulted, and told to not become a mother. Simply because her choices are different. What is truly harmful is the intolerance shown to those with differing/unpopular opinions.
Thank you for this!Okay let me ask you a question... what is it that makes you feel uncomfortable when a mother is breastfeeding her child in public? How many times have you see it?
I've seen it a couple of times myself. What makes me uncomfortable is that to me, feeding a child from your breast, which is a private part of your body, should not be a public act. I don't get why it is so hard to go and find a private room to do it in, or pump (if you can) and bring it with you to the store instead of lifting your shirt and having to have the baby latch on and be exposed like that.0 -
Breast feeding, public or not, is natural. Sometimes awkward, but hey, when baby is hungry, would you rather have screaming baby or happy baby? Imagine how you would feel if you weren't allowed to eat in public!
And also how uncomfortable they would feel while sitting in a cafe drinking coffee while the baby is screaming. A screaming child now that is uncomfortable.0 -
The good thing about all this is that, no matter what other people's OPINIONS are on this matter, the vast majority of states have laws in place that supercede all of them. Almost all states allow a mother to BF wherever they and children are otherwise allowed to be. Period.
Laws can change, especially when something is divisive. Also, just because something is protected by a law doesn't mean the social stigma is removed. But yes, at least for now all those who are offended by it luckily can't enforce their feelings.0 -
The good thing about all this is that, no matter what other people's OPINIONS are on this matter, the vast majority of states have laws in place that supercede all of them. Almost all states allow a mother to BF wherever they and children are otherwise allowed to be. Period.
Laws can change, especially when something is divisive. But yes, at least for now all those who are offended by it luckily can't enforce their feelings.
I don't think it will ever become unlawful. There is just a huge part of the population you would lose if you were a politician who supported it. I'm acknowledging that the majority of people don't feel how I do. I just wish that the people who do BF in public might consider others' feelings before engaging in the act.0 -
BS! There is nothing harmful or narrow minded about her point of view. Especially considering that she appears to be miles more open minded to differing views than you are. How many times must she state that she is not against breast feeding and supports before her overall view is deemed acceptable? Not once has the OP told anyone they were wrong for their opinion on this topic, but the OP has been repeatedly slammed, insulted, and told to not become a mother. Simply because her choices are different. What is truly harmful is the intolerance shown to those with differing/unpopular opinions.
Thank you for this!
You are very welcome. I must say, I have to commend you for the maturity you've shown in holding your ground and respectfully disagreeing with others *in spite of your age* that several posters have tried to imply as a handicap.0 -
I can't even begin to read this whole thread, or care about what most of this has to say, for that matter.
What always gets me is the idea that people both for and against breastfeeding seem to think that it is perfectly acceptable to insist a mother take her baby into a bathroom and feed them there. If that is what you are comfortable with, go right ahead.
My question is whether any one of you would find it acceptable for me to take my sandwich and salad at lunch and go camp out in a stall and eat it. Is there not a single one of you that wouldn't find that incredibly disturbing? seriously GROSS! I don't eat in the bathroom... I don't even bring my lunch in the lunch bag in the bathroom. I don't even bring the water bottle i am going to fill on my way back to the office into the bathroom. Why would I EVER insist that a mother feeding her baby should go hide herself away in the bathroom like she was doing something wrong?
cover yourself... don't cover yourself... do what you are comfortable with. People are going to stare either way. Be prepared to accept it since there isn't much you can do about it. People stare at people in wheelchairs. We are uncouth and complete buffoons... but seriously.... STOP DEMANDING MOTHERS HIDE THEMSELVES AND THEIR CHILDREN AS THOUGH THEY SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF FEEDING THEIR KIDS.
Soon people are going to insist that expecting mothers go back into "confinement" before they give birth... as though they have some disease that is catching. (To be safe... i am just going to stay away from expecting mothers... you know... in case it actually is catching! ;-) )0
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