Would you date someone whose religion is different than your

I feel a mutual understanding must be established at the start of a relationship. My husband is Catholic, and I am Episcopal. And we have all our ducks in a row, and did before we got married. What is good for one couple, may not be for another.

I'm an Athiest and would prefer to date Athiests and Agnostics. Blind faith is just not something I can be intimate with as a woman of science.

I wouldn't want my kids to go to church unless I'd educated them about all the different ideas about the origin of the universe and they personally decided to explore that religion.

First off, just because someone believes in God does not mean that they do not believe in science. There are scientists that believe in God and there are educated people that believe in God as well. I am married to a university professor with his PhD and he believes in God.

Now back to the question. I think iti would be difficult to marry someone of a different faith. Not impossible, but I think it would add a lot of difficulty. Mostly when it comes to children. If you believe in God, you will want your children to believe in God. If you are an Atheist, then most likely, you think that people that believe in God believe in fairies and are weak minded, so you do not want your children to fall into that weak trap. If you are Jewish, would you want your children to believe in Jesus?

Religion, whether it is a strong belief or a lack is very deep rooted in us. It is our core on who we are, where we come from, and where will we go.

Just as political viewpoints can be a problem (you want your kids to be conservative and your spouse wants them to be liberal) or you eat differently, you think eating animals is wrong, but your spouse eats meat and likes to fix your kids burgers on the grill.

Those are just some other things that people really need to consider when they are planning on spending the rest of their life with someone and they are planning on having children.


I have a lot of friends that are Atheist, Agnostic, Liberal...I have no problem with what they believe, we agree to disagree. But being a friend is totally different than spending your life with someone and having children together. In a friendship, you can still be two individual people, but when we are married we are to become one...this is a lot easier to do if most of your beliefs are the same...it is difficult if a lot of your beliefs are different. (I need to add, becoming one does not mean you lose your identity or your individuality, it just means that you are on the same track and of the same mind of your future together)

It is not "sad" that someone may not believe in what you do.

I will be praying to the Flying Spaghetti Monster for you, that he may illuminate you with his noodly appendages and tomatoey goodness.

Pastafarians UNITE.

I have dated men of many different religions, in the end they have to be mature enough to know what they want. I really recommend being with a man who will support and want your children to go to church like you do. It means you'll be more solid in your belief system with your children. I agree with a woman who said that if you do have children with him - they should know their father's beliefs too.

My current bf is Hindu and I share the same beliefs - we both agreed we would raise our children with those beliefs and morales, but we would also educate them in other religions and let them choose.

Basically do what makes you happy and empowers you

I am catholic, my husband of 13 years is agnostic. He was not raised in any organized religion. So far my children are being raised catholic as was agreed upon before we got married. His thinking was that religion was more important to me than to him, so he was willing to let me be in charge in that area.

It is not without issue in our marriage, but we work through the issues.

I really don't see how I can keep God in my life AND my ex at the same time.

You can't.

The two of you have entirely different philosophies. You are at entirely different ends of a spectrum that is wholly important to you.

Move on. You made the right decision.

I'm not religious and neither is my boyfriend but we both agree that if we had a child it will be educated in all religions cultures and beliefs as we have been. Then as they grow up they can make their own decisions with what religion, if any, they wish to follow.
If I were in a relationship with someone who was a different religion I would allow the child to do what they choose, if they want to go to church with you then that's cool but I wouldn't force them, but I'd allow them to hear both views of the parents and let them choose ultimately.

I'm very atheist, anti-religion. I couldn't be in a serious relationship with someone religious.
My husband is more agnostic and even that borders on being a problem. He has no issues with the kids going to church if they want (but he's not taking them, i.e. go with a friend) wheras I'm totally against them going at all.

i wuld not wish hell on anyone but th path that you ar en you well see it. I will be praying for you. there is a God and he is a loving God and he knows this facts abouyouand still loves you. Please open your eyes to the wonderful light of God

I like the sound of that, thanks! will definitely look into it!

Well..now my ex has changed his tune a little, and says he'd allow his children to go to church.

And you believe him, that's cute.

gee, thanks.

Thank you (everyone else) for your responses! Keep them comin'!

Do you think I'm joking? Honey. Think about it for a few seconds. He didn't suddenly do a 180 on his beliefs. He's telling you what you want to hear to get you back. Open your eyes OK?

...I'm going to keep my mouth shut and just ignore you.

I will ignore with you.

I am Catholic and my boyfriend is Atheist. I have no plans on letting him go because his belief isn't who he is or how he defines himself, and the same with me. I believe in raising children to make their own educated choices about religion rather than forcing one on them when they are too young to make a choice!

The first guy I dated was a Catholic. He was not overly religious, but he went to church every week because if he didn't he was going to hell. It was difficult for me to date him. I knew in my heart that I shouldn't be with someone who didn't have the same beliefs that I did, but I thought I could convert him.

I am a born-again believer, have been since I was 7 years old. It most definitely Defines me. I do NOT have a religion, I have a very deep personal relationship with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Without HIM, I am nothing. HE Defines ME.

My husband is also a born-again believer. Christ defines him as well. We would not be married if that were not the case.

The Bible is VERY clear on this subject. If you are in fact a Christian, you are NOT to be unequally yoked with an unbeliever.

Some people handle their faith in different ways I am not a Catholic by choice, but there are parts of the religion that I have a lot of faith in. Spiritually, I am in no means tied to one religion, one belief, or one faith. Faith and religion are fluid to me. I appreciate your input, but there is no one right answer for everybody

Im catholic, and my husband is not. We had to take premarital classes to be allowed to get married in the catholic church. In these classes we talked about money, sex, religion, a whole lot of stuff. The religion thing though, I ended up being the one with an issue because my husband said he was fine with having our kids raised catholic, but I didnt want him to feel like I was forcing it on him. It was nice to really talk it out and agree on it before we're actually have to address it - Now we're on the same page about what will happen when we have kids

as far as dating someone of a different religion - I have dated other catholics, I've dated a jewish guy, and a couple other christian denominations, as well as a devout athiest. As a practicing Catholic, I still think things like the golden rule are more important than whether or not you go to church every week.

So yes I have dated guys of a different religion and it has never been an issue as long as everyone is respectful and your boyfriend wouldnt say something like "mommys crazy since she believes in god" or something like that to your fictional (at this point) kids. It is definitely something that should be talked about now though and not say "ok maybe they can go to church, we'll see how I feel when I actually have them" because that is something that you need to make sure you're both clear on before it ever happens

Yes I would date or possibly marry someone with a different religion then me I mean why not I am married to a man who has a different racial background and alot of the ways we were raised etc etc were different but when we had kids we came up with our own way of doing things not how we were raised but you know relationship and life for that matter are not easy. At the end of the day it's whatever is best for you.

Yes.

I'm Christian, my husband was raised Catholic. He isn't a practicing Catholic and doesn't agree with a lot of it now so he goes along with what I do. I'm not as active in my church community as I use to be growing up but I do have my faith and strong beliefs and he respects them regardless if he agrees with them or not. Coincidentally...he wants our kids to go to church growing up because he does believe that it installs positive ideas into a childs mind aka enforces respect, tolerance, forgiveness, saying sorry etc. and then when they're old enough, they can decide what they want to believe in.


OP....I highly doubt anything has changed for your ex....being religious and not religious isn't something that just happens and if you broke up over this, I would put money on it that it's going to be a future issue if you get back together.

Can I just add....the intolerance in this thread has my head spinning. The hypocrisy of non religious attacking the religious and vise versa is mind baffling.

I am completely with you on this one. Are you my long-lost sister? A relationship where two people do not share the same beliefs can work, if you can set and agree to the ground rules. You need to treat each other and each other's beliefs with respect. If you can't do that, then it is probably best long term for you not to try this relationship again.

In my day to day life, at work, out in public, I interact with, am friends with and work closely with people of extremely varying views on religion. For those of you bashing people of different beliefs than yourself, how do you deal with the people in your lives that are not just like you? Do you call them the names you are calling each other here? Do you belittle them and their beliefs like you are here?

Atheist/Anti-theist, married to a non-devout Christian. I'm fine with her, cuz she doesn't prOselytize. She takes my daughter to church daycare, but I don't support the teachings when she asks me. When she gets old enough we'll have the talk and let her make up her own mind. Heck, right now she believes princesses are real.

This used to be a huge deal for me... I've been agnostic since childhood, formally since college. I was raised by bible-thumping Christians, both sides of the family. So... I guess I've always had to deal with this. I think my family pretty much "gets it" that it's just a non-topic for me, when I'm around them.

Now... as for a significant other. My ex-bf of six years was a Christian. In the end, it wasn't so much religion that separated us, as it was several things piled on top of one another. But he was very obstinate and obnoxious in his beliefs, which were a big turn-off... oddly, we were nevertheless very much attracted to one another... and still have love for one another to this day, we're good friends.

I'm a newlywed... we've been married four months now. He's not just a Christian, he's a Messianic Jewish Christian... LOL. I won't explain this, just Google it. He pretty much just observes Sabbath on Saturday... and doesn't eat pork, shellfish, tries to attend synagogue (which is an hour away) on occasion... fine & dandy with me. I could give a rip. He does know that I stand firmly in my agnosticism... there's pretty much no changing me there. I respond only to cool logic... As for kids, if/when we have ONE (lol, one not two or three...) I've explained to him what I will tolerate & allow: The child will never be taught there is "one" way, the "right" way, etc... and that a belief in God is a choice. The child will always be allowed to choose... that is the most important thing for me. Church/synagogue with Dad will be an option.

That said.... I think it takes real tolerance to do something like this... just a few years ago, I'd never have been ok with it. My ex and I went round in circles. Not sure I wold have married someone of a different set of beliefs when I was in my 20's. Maturity helps!