Survey time: Should a guy pay on a first date?
Replies
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Yes, he asked me out
Well in that case she should have paid and picked up the tip... if you went out for drinks after it would have been good for you to pick up a round. But the night was by no means your responsibility financially… although I do admit if a woman offers to drop the tip if I am paying then I am impressed even if I don’t let her.0 -
I think he should pay! Of course, I'm spoiled cause I have a guy friend that pays for my stuff every time we hang out and that's not even a date!0
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If he asked you out...he pays - if you asked him out...you should be prepared to pay. A true gentlemen will pay regardless.
This0 -
if he asked you out and it was your first date...YES he should pay0
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I get asked on a lot of dates and I only go on the ones with the guys that I really like. To me it honestly just seem like its a numbers game to guys. If they ask out a bunch of girls eventually one will say yes.
Of course it is a numbers game.
What else do you expect them to do? Sit at home, crying, hoping that women will ask him out?
More women should ask men out. I actually invited my bf out for the first time (it was a group happy hour), and he beat me to the first-date asking out--kinda caught me off guard! I was going to ask him to go to dinner with me and before I could even get the sentence out he asked me out first. I just think if you're interested, do something about it.
AGREED
Rightttt but we all know most guys dont want the girl who has to ask for dates. Unless you were friends prior, any girl asking total strangers out on dates looks totally desperate. Sorry to break it to everyone. But guys be honest here, would you be going after the woman that no one else even wants to ask out?
Are you kidding me? I've asked guys out plenty of times and never been turned down. Did it all the time in college, and not just to guys I already knew. I think men find it attractive when a woman goes after what she wants. Has nothing to do with being desperate, if men can play the field and go on dates with several different women before deciding to get serious with one, why can't women do the same? I seriously lived like a man in college...0 -
Consider it a $50 investment in not making serious mistake later. You gained valuable information that you would not have had he paid for everything. Cut your losses now and move on.0
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I think he should pay! Of course, I'm spoiled cause I have a guy friend that pays for my stuff every time we hang out and that's not even a date!
FRIENDZONED0 -
ONLY IF HE WANTS A SECOND ONE!0
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if you enjoy pretending to be a man then more power to you. Dont complain when men dont respect and treat you like a lady though.Rightttt but we all know most guys dont want the girl who has to ask for dates. Unless you were friends prior, any girl asking total strangers out on dates looks totally desperate. Sorry to break it to everyone. But guys be honest here, would you be going after the woman that no one else even wants to ask out?
Are you kidding me? I've asked guys out plenty of times and never been turned down. Did it all the time in college, and not just to guys I already knew. I think men find it attractive when a woman goes after what she wants. Has nothing to do with being desperate, if men can play the field and go on dates with several different women before deciding to get serious with one, why can't women do the same? I seriously lived like a man in college...
And duh of course they're not gonna turn you down. They probably think its a free ticket to your drawers lol.
Another thing I wanna add is a man paying applies to potential relationshio dates. If you want a booty call, then it doesnt even matter0 -
I always offer to pay-but deep down I feel he should-especially on a first date 0
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I think he should pay! Of course, I'm spoiled cause I have a guy friend that pays for my stuff every time we hang out and that's not even a date!
you're mean haha0 -
I think he should pay! Of course, I'm spoiled cause I have a guy friend that pays for my stuff every time we hang out and that's not even a date!
FRIENDZONED
or a sugar daddy0 -
As a rule of thumb I think guys should pay on a date all of the time. But in today's society I know some things have changed, so I would say if he asked you out, he should most definitely pay but if you asked him out , he might expect you to pay. The only time I think you should go dutch is if it is discussed prior to the date. Only after you are in an actual relationship, do I personally, ever really think it is okay for the girl to pay though. Whatever happened to chivalry? Being wooed ? You are worth it !0
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Second this. Mine paid on our first date but I offered to pick up a 6-pack on the way home. We live together now and he pays most of the time when we go out. Other things we trade on: groceries, house things we need from store, etc...If he asked you out...he pays - if you asked him out...you should be prepared to pay. A true gentlemen will pay regardless.
This0 -
Yes, he should. I go prepared with cash anyway (because I don't know him & don't know what kind of man he is), but I never bring out my wallet unless absolutely necessary (like secretly tipping a waitress after a bad date).0
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Honestly? My ex asked me out and we dated for 2 years. And believe me, she didn't ask because she couldn't get a date, she asked because she wanted to date me. Big difference.I get asked on a lot of dates and I only go on the ones with the guys that I really like. To me it honestly just seem like its a numbers game to guys. If they ask out a bunch of girls eventually one will say yes.
Of course it is a numbers game.
What else do you expect them to do? Sit at home, crying, hoping that women will ask him out?
More women should ask men out. I actually invited my bf out for the first time (it was a group happy hour), and he beat me to the first-date asking out--kinda caught me off guard! I was going to ask him to go to dinner with me and before I could even get the sentence out he asked me out first. I just think if you're interested, do something about it.
AGREED
Rightttt but we all know most guys dont want the girl who has to ask for dates. Unless you were friends prior, any girl asking total strangers out on dates looks totally desperate. Sorry to break it to everyone. But guys be honest here, would you be going after the woman that no one else even wants to ask out?0 -
Honestly? My ex asked me out and we dated for 2 years. And believe me, she didn't ask because she couldn't get a date, she asked because she wanted to date me. Big difference.
Why didnt you ask her though?0 -
Hmmm.... I will never go on a date expecting the guy to pay. If he offers or persists I will allow it, but most of the time I offer to pay for my portion. If he pays for dinner then I will treat him to something else...like a beer at the bar or ice cream. Or maybe I will pay for the 2nd date.0
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I know equal right and all that but if I guy does not pay for me on the first date I just assume he is a tight a*rse and he not getting a second date.
Your instincts are correct! In a way, it's a test to make sure they really care about you. A man should want to provide for his woman, whether she needs it or not. If a man expects me to take care of myself, how can I trust him to look after me if the need should arise?
I've gone out with guys I wasn't really interested in dating because we were doing something fun that I wanted to do. In that case, I insisted on paying my share because I wanted to be sure they don't think I owed them something. If I was truly interested in a man, I allowed him to be a gentleman and pick up the tab like a man.
It's good for a man's self-esteem to be able to provide for a woman. It's good for a woman's self-esteem to know a man wants to take care of her.
One caveat: It occurs to me that women sometimes ask men out. In this case, the woman should pay, unless the man insists on paying. If you care about him, and he insists on paying, it's good to give in.
At 60, I'm "The Voice of Experience." 0 -
The guy should always pay ! Chivalry isnt dead yet!
This0 -
The girl should pay if she expects me to give it up.0
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Wow...just wow.
if you enjoy pretending to be a man then more power to you. Dont complain when men dont respect and treat you like a lady though.Rightttt but we all know most guys dont want the girl who has to ask for dates. Unless you were friends prior, any girl asking total strangers out on dates looks totally desperate. Sorry to break it to everyone. But guys be honest here, would you be going after the woman that no one else even wants to ask out?
Are you kidding me? I've asked guys out plenty of times and never been turned down. Did it all the time in college, and not just to guys I already knew. I think men find it attractive when a woman goes after what she wants. Has nothing to do with being desperate, if men can play the field and go on dates with several different women before deciding to get serious with one, why can't women do the same? I seriously lived like a man in college...
And duh of course they're not gonna turn you down. They probably think its a free ticket to your drawers lol.
Another thing I wanna add is a man paying applies to potential relationshio dates. If you want a booty call, then it doesnt even matter0 -
I thought she was out of my league.Honestly? My ex asked me out and we dated for 2 years. And believe me, she didn't ask because she couldn't get a date, she asked because she wanted to date me. Big difference.
Why didnt you ask her though?0 -
DEAL BREAKER... especially on the first date! I'm guessing he didn't want a second date...
ETA... The only thing I offer to pay on the first date is the tip and I might give him the side-eye if he allows me to pay it!0 -
I think the guy should pay on the first date but if there are follow up dates you should take turns0
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My now-husband wouldn't let me pay on the first date. After the first date, I'd try hard to beat him to the check, which rarely worked. As we got more serious, I insisted on at least splitting, or we'd alternate who would pay/leave the tip.
As for the first date, as a general rule-- I would say whomever asked the other out should technically pay.0 -
Guys should always pay for the first date and every one there after. And open doors too.0
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if you enjoy pretending to be a man then more power to you. Dont complain when men dont respect and treat you like a lady though.Rightttt but we all know most guys dont want the girl who has to ask for dates. Unless you were friends prior, any girl asking total strangers out on dates looks totally desperate. Sorry to break it to everyone. But guys be honest here, would you be going after the woman that no one else even wants to ask out?
Are you kidding me? I've asked guys out plenty of times and never been turned down. Did it all the time in college, and not just to guys I already knew. I think men find it attractive when a woman goes after what she wants. Has nothing to do with being desperate, if men can play the field and go on dates with several different women before deciding to get serious with one, why can't women do the same? I seriously lived like a man in college...
And duh of course they're not gonna turn you down. They probably think its a free ticket to your drawers lol.
Another thing I wanna add is a man paying applies to potential relationshio dates. If you want a booty call, then it doesnt even matter
You really need to broaden your horizons here. We, women, are the one who asked to be treated as equals, but it's apparently wrong for me to conduct myself as....an equal?
I never had to sleep with a guy to get him to like me. A man likes a woman who is sure of herself and confident to go after what she wants. I've never been treated poorly by any man I've ever asked out. The only men who've treated me like crap have been ones who've wined and dined me all old-fashioned style. I'm not saying that's the way things are, that's just my personal experience.
I asked men out to get to know them and maybe one day have a relationship with them. What's wrong with playing the field a little and seeing what's out there before just sticking with one person?0 -
Wow...just wow.
So if a random girl is hitting on you at a bar or college party, you honestly think she wants a future relationship?
I'm not saying its bad to go out and hook up, but dont pretend like its something its not.0 -
Unless your friendship is platonic If he asked you out on a date he should have paid...0
This discussion has been closed.
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