Survey time: Should a guy pay on a first date?

Rightttt but we all know most guys dont want the girl who has to ask for dates. Unless you were friends prior, any girl asking total strangers out on dates looks totally desperate. Sorry to break it to everyone. But guys be honest here, would you be going after the woman that no one else even wants to ask out?

Are you kidding me? I've asked guys out plenty of times and never been turned down. Did it all the time in college, and not just to guys I already knew. I think men find it attractive when a woman goes after what she wants. Has nothing to do with being desperate, if men can play the field and go on dates with several different women before deciding to get serious with one, why can't women do the same? I seriously lived like a man in college...

if you enjoy pretending to be a man then more power to you. Dont complain when men dont respect and treat you like a lady though.

And duh of course they're not gonna turn you down. They probably think its a free ticket to your drawers lol.

Another thing I wanna add is a man paying applies to potential relationshio dates. If you want a booty call, then it doesnt even matter

I make it known after a few dates what my expectations are... I want to do things for you because I want to, not because I have to. If it's expected, you're gone. I'll always pay for the first date. I asked her out, its only fair.

It's pretty easy to spot the take care of my types, usually little to no money, attractive to where they get enough attention to get away with it, just looking for someone to support them financially at the end of the day. The ones with the good careers don't get their panties in a wad spending 10 dollars on drinks after I spent 100 on dinner.

I'm not going to "pay" to have the privledge to hang out with a woman.

Well I have my own job, apartment, car, went to college and I'm pretty successful. I dont see why I have to settle for a guy who cant even plan a date.

Not planning is just lazy.

Expecting a man to always pay for every date and continue to have that expectation in a relationship? Selfish. If you have a job then seriously, fork out 30 dollars every once in a while.

The way I look at it. Traditional gender roles are stupid. I'd rather have a combined gross income of 300k-400k a year, each of us making ~150k-200k a year, and pay people to do the laundry, clean the house etc. vs. someone who makes 30k a year and cleans my clothes.

Wow...just wow.

So if a random girl is hitting on you at a bar or college party, you honestly think she wants a future relationship?

I'm not saying its bad to go out and hook up, but dont pretend like its something its not.

Two of my best friends met at a college party, they are still married and have two beautiful daughters. Try again, lots of people meet their spouse at a party. Sure plenty just want o hook up but that's getting kind of off topic.

Rightttt but we all know most guys dont want the girl who has to ask for dates. Unless you were friends prior, any girl asking total strangers out on dates looks totally desperate. Sorry to break it to everyone. But guys be honest here, would you be going after the woman that no one else even wants to ask out?

Are you kidding me? I've asked guys out plenty of times and never been turned down. Did it all the time in college, and not just to guys I already knew. I think men find it attractive when a woman goes after what she wants. Has nothing to do with being desperate, if men can play the field and go on dates with several different women before deciding to get serious with one, why can't women do the same? I seriously lived like a man in college...

if you enjoy pretending to be a man then more power to you. Dont complain when men dont respect and treat you like a lady though.

And duh of course they're not gonna turn you down. They probably think its a free ticket to your drawers lol.

Another thing I wanna add is a man paying applies to potential relationshio dates. If you want a booty call, then it doesnt even matter

Pretending to be a man?? Are you serious? What century do you live in? You must have forgotten that we are all human and a woman can ask a guy out on a date just like a guy can ask a woman out on a date, its has nothing to do with pretending. If anything having the old fashion stereotypes is more pretending since its all done for show. A date is about two people getting to know each other or to have a good time anyways, not about who can be bought or who is owed.

BTW, my husband and I went half and half on our first date and I was the one who asked and we have been married for 11 years now. We split everything to the best we can (our funds are joint now since we're married, just easier for us to manage things). Mutual respect is important in a relationship and I'm glad I'm not caught into a "I'm owed this" just because I'm a female or one where the guy thinks I could of been "bought" he just because he is a guy, neither of those kind of relationships are founded on respect.

I know the comment wasn't towards me but that just irk me seeing such an ignorant post.

I'm old school, so i would pay regardless, however, things have changed greatly, online dating, stuff getting more expensive, people having to work more hours just to survive..

maybe the first dates doing dinner don't always need to happen, go out for coffee or something like that, cheaper, won't break the bank, shorter time so you can politely bow out if there is no spark.

but I never had to worry that I would ever date the type of girl that orders 6 lobster tails, 3 bottles of wine, etc..

Women wanted equal rights. You got it. Now, fork out the bill for the date

On average, women in the U.S. make about 24% less income than men. It isn't equal. I wish it were. I'd buy all the cranky folks on here an ice cream with that money. Or iced vegan coconut cream.

http://www.catalyst.org/publication/217/womens-earnings-and-income
http://www.americanprogress.org/issues/2009/01/wage_gap_numbers.html
http://bottomline.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/03/13/10603040-the-worst-paying-cities-for-women?lite
http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1983185,00.html

The income gap is due to job selection IMO.

My sister is a doctor and the other works in IT. They make as much or more than most men but they chose a career that pays more.

personally I think That whoever asked whomever on the date should foot the bill... that being said I think that men should always offer to pay for the date ..

I have never had to pay for a date , not that I haven't ever done so, I am a huge gift giver .. and I ask for very little.. my whole concept on this thought has changed as of late and I think that you should be as spoiled as you spoil .. if that makes sense.. its hard being a giving person in a relationship with someone who is selfish.. in the beginning it make work on your devotion alone but it takes two to make it work and for both partners to feel valued and appreciated..

Women wanted equal rights. You got it. Now, fork out the bill for the date

On average, women in the U.S. make about 24% less income than men. It isn't equal. I wish it were. I'd buy all the cranky folks on here an ice cream with that money. Or iced vegan coconut cream.

http://www.catalyst.org/publication/217/womens-earnings-and-income
http://www.americanprogress.org/issues/2009/01/wage_gap_numbers.html
http://bottomline.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/03/13/10603040-the-worst-paying-cities-for-women?lite
http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1983185,00.html

The income gap is due to job selection IMO.

My sister is a doctor and the other works in IT. They make as much or more than most men but they chose a career that pays more.

I wish the entertainment industry would catch up with the IT/medical industries if that's true. In publishing, we all make less.

Whoever asks the person out should pay.

But, at least from my experience, the guy usually asks out the girl. So the guy pays for the first date, that's cool. I think then the girl should pay for the second date, or at least the third.

Women wanted equal rights. You got it. Now, fork out the bill for the date

On average, women in the U.S. make about 24% less income than men. It isn't equal. I wish it were. I'd buy all the cranky folks on here an ice cream with that money. Or iced vegan coconut cream.

http://www.catalyst.org/publication/217/womens-earnings-and-income
http://www.americanprogress.org/issues/2009/01/wage_gap_numbers.html
http://bottomline.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/03/13/10603040-the-worst-paying-cities-for-women?lite
http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1983185,00.html

The income gap is due to job selection IMO.

My sister is a doctor and the other works in IT. They make as much or more than most men but they chose a career that pays more.

No I believe its calculated by industry. I know a lot of male engineers make more than women too.

I think the guy should pay as well! ESPECIALLY if he asked you out. Either way I think the guys should pay!

What a loser! I went on a date with a guy and he would not pay for my $3 salad. Even tho I gave his young son a $75 gift...wtf. No second date... oh, and his car broke down in the middle of no where and I sent a friend to save him. Only because he had a young son with him.... NEXT

A man should pay on the first date unless you know him well or you don't plan on going on a second date with him.

I know the comment wasn't towards me but that just irk me seeing such an ignorant post.

Yep, ignorance is rampant on these forums.

For example...my quote below.

You damn right he should pay. He should pay every single time they go out...until they have established a relationship. At that point, it should be alternated regularly, but still not a necessity.

I will NEVER let a woman pay on the first 3-4 dates. That's just wrong.

^ This is why women should try to pay for their share. To avoid the "Never let" types. It weeds them out.

Of course the man should pay. if he cant afford/doesnt want to pay, then why is he asking me out in the first place? i dont want to date a woman, i want to date a MAN.

The difference between men and women is in our chromosomes, not in some out-dated theory on who should pay (dating back to when most women didn't have money because they didn't work). Maybe he's asking you out because he thinks you're interesting or kind or open-minded or very attractive. Shame that all he's going to get is a cheap, self-centered and sexist young lady whose idea of a meaningful relationship is entertainment at someone else's expense. My comment may seem harsh to you, but if you were a man, my guess is you wouldn't hold that same opinion.

So you honestly dont think men and women act differently socially and emotionally?