One Year Later, 100+ loss (pics)

Hey everyone so today is my one year anniversary on MFP. It has been a painful/heartbreaking process as well as a beautiful one. My heighest recorded weight was 362.5 pounds I believe I have weighed more however. I've always been an overweight/obese person even in my childhood. I was always the 'fattest' girl in the room. I'm used to people spitting on me and calling me names and being rejected every day from society. I sufferred from really bad self-esteem, depression, type 2 diabetes (injected insulin five times a day) and very high blood pressure. I remember being almost hospitilized for my diabetes and always having a really red face and sweating and just feeling so sick. I had doctors tell me I wouldn't make it to thirty years old.

I don't have alot of pictures of myself but the ones to follow here are from around 2010.







I was seeing a bariatric surgeon who promised me from the time I saw him to my surgery day it would be around 3-5 years. In June 2011 I had already been seeing him for 7 years an he told me he would now accept me for surgery after I had recently lost 40 pounds. I had lost 40 pounds by going through a seperation from my husband, stress and trying to not eat every meal at Mcdonalds (which was one of my big weaknesses as well as CHIPS). Well my surgeon let me know that it would be another 3 years until my surgery date. Something inside of me snapped. I just got really mad. Mad at the system, mad at the world, mad at myself and thought "*kitten* THIS, I'll do it myself".
My friend Heather told me about MFP....so I signed up.

It's been a year. I now weigh 244.8 pounds and have another 54 to loose. I have cried and had mental break downs about every ten pounds down. I have gone through having to deal with my emotions for the first time instead of stuffing them down with food. I have had to learn about coping skills, what food really is and how screwed up society really is about one's size. I am continualy shocked about how 'fat' people are treated differently and the judgements that are passed to them. I have a ways to go and I know I will get there. I no longer take insulin for my diabetes, infact I am on zero medication for diabetes, I control it through diet and excercise. I am on one blood pressure medication out of five. I can breathe, I can dance I can laugh.







I always eat my excercise calories, I own an HRM and love the gym. I have my bad days as a former binger and it still happens but I get right back up an start again. Thanks for reading and I wish everyone success no matter how small or big their goals may be.