Why be a side-chick???
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I have met some down-right nasty, evil women who are abusive to their husbands and withhold intimacy like it's a toy.
So THAT'S the validation that homewreckers tell themselves! I get it.
No, wait.
No I don't.
You can't wreck a home that's already broken.0 -
"Side chicks" are a particularly sad breed of woman. In my experience, they break down into two groups.
There's the desparate ones who kind of fell into it and they probably honestly think that the man will leave his wife (most cases he won't) and they just let themselves get strung along...
And then there are the sluts, who say they do it because they don't like strings and all they want is the sex and thrill, but the truth is in the end they're just as sad as the woman who's getting strung along.
So pathetic. Women who search for "power" and self esteem by landing a man or taking him from someone else will never truly be happy.
Must be nice to be perfect. Congrats.0 -
this has got to be one of the oldest and dumbest debates of all time.. Women will bash men and say they are the worst and men will say women are just the same.. no one will ever win as no matter what it is still going to happen.. if you dont like it.. good for you do your thing.. if you like doing this kinda thing.. good great have a ball..
you think the other s/o sitting at home is not getting some attention somewhere.. lies.. it might not be sexual or physical.. but it is mental... facebook and other sites even like this one give that person t home a place to talk to other people and post their pictures and have the opposite sex tell them how nice they look or how sexy they are blah blah blah.. if you where truelly in such a committed and deep relationship that you needed no one other than your significant other then why are you here posting your pictures.. if you want advice get advice they dont need to see you to give advice..
so like i said do your thing have a ball, do what makes you happy in life because in the end it is your life.. no one is better than anyone for the choices they make.. everyone loves attention!!!!!!!!!!!!
bite me0 -
Speaking from experience, I have been a side chick. I can tell you my reasons for accepting it, convenience. For me, I was just getting out of a messy long 18 year marriage, and the thought of not having to be accountable to anyone, but have the companionship was very attractive.to me. It worked well for quite a while, both she and I knew about each other, an unspoken understanding I suppose. I am not proud of it to be honest, but I am also not ashamed of it either...0
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It depends on the kind of relationship one is in. If both have comitted to be monogam, its very much different to a relationship lacking commitment for whatever reason. The way I see it, we are talking about two adults, who make decisions - and need to face the consequence of any decision made, good or bad. I for example don;t get pissed of with the side chick, I am pissed of with the cheat - the consequence, a broken relationship and me walking out
However, a relationship needs two people to work on it and two people to fail it - let's be frank, if you are all happy slappy and all is sorted and your sexlife is beyond awesome, you will be far less tempted to go and find a bit on the side. No one ever said relationships are easy.0 -
In my opinion, I don't always put blame on a side-chick. I have on two occasions in my life been with someone who was involved in a relationship. Not saying that would ever happen again as my bf and I have a strong, honest and wonderful relationship. We both know that the other won't cheat and have no reason to.
The reason I did it: if it's just sex to me, a man's business is not mine. I don't know what his relationship is like, I don't know how he is treated at home, I don't care what his reasons are for finding sex elsewhere. I have met some down-right nasty, evil women who are abusive to their husbands and withhold intimacy like it's a toy. I honestly DON'T feel sorry for those women when their husbands stray or find someone to fill their needs when the wife won't out of spite.
Bottom line, in my opinion, is that an affair is an issue between a man and his wife. Not the other woman.
*so you as a human being have no accountability whatsoever..?*
whats your sweet boyfriends name .. I wonder if I can lure him away. ..... . .? shouldn't be a problem for you I could care less about your intention , how much time you have put into the relationship and JUST an FYI women dont turn into nasty B@$#hs overnight ... There is always a reason.. maybe signals that the cheating was around the corner.. you are one of those sad gullible girls who believes what these poor men tell you.. first work on your values, secondly learn how to tell a rat @$$ from a "man" ... and thirdly .. just wait Karma's a hell of a teacher.
I would give you my boyfriend's name and number in a heartbeat and feel completely comfortable with you trying to lure him in. Because we have an honest, open relationship built on trust and we just work perfectly together!
Call me a sad, guillible girl if you'd like but I have to go home and have amazing sex with my wonderful bf on my lunchbreak.
Although I agree some women have it coming for them, because they stop having sex and become distant/mean with their husbands...but it does not mean they deserve it. If a husband/partner is that unhappy he should LEAVE NOT CHEAT, than he can go **** whomever they want. But as long as they are "married" or in "relationship" they made a promise to stay true to this person, they made promise not to f*** someone else, they are lying to their partner, NO ONE deserves that, and though some have it coming for them I still feel sorry for them because it did not have to end like that.
And what if the person they cheat with has STD's??? and they pass it on to their parner later???? That is just F***ed upm, they have no consideration of how it can affect the other person.
See it's women like you who go willingly and **** other people's partners because you don't feel "sorry" because the wife had it coming for her...just another pathetic excuse of a cheater. Whether someone had it coming for them, you are still hurting someone and their family, that is NOT right, no matter what excuse you make up to help you sleep at night. It's inconsiderate and evil. period.
You may feel comfortable with your bf now...but it doens't mean at some point he may lose interest in you and cheat on you, it happens to many people who least expect it, and you have no control over it other than trying to be a good gf. People change all the time...no matter how much you think that person loves you.0 -
I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.
Some of this...some of "I didn't know" out there as well.
Also, the side person is also probably being told how horrible the wife or husband is so of course they think they can make that person happier.. Nine times out of ten the married person does NOT leave their spouse. I've been on both sides...all sides suck and everyone should just stay in their rooms!!!!!!!!!!!!!0 -
Good sex without the commitment or headache.
This is why once upon a time I was a side chick and I was ok with it. Do not do it now.0 -
i also have been a "side chick" i was young and dumb! & cared about nothing but myself.
i was made to believe he would "leave" her! haha boy was i wrong!
9months later we both had his kids & he never stuck around for either of us!0 -
I've seen both sides of the side-chick - does she know or not.
I had a couple side-chicks seek me out to tell me they were the side chick when they found out I existed. Wasn't that fun.
I had at least one that could have cared less that my picture was on the nightstand as she f#cked my husband.0 -
I personally would not ever be the side chick because I know what it feels like to be cheated on, and would never want to make someone else feel like that!
girl code.
nuff said!
Exactly!!0 -
"Side chicks" are a particularly sad breed of woman. In my experience, they break down into two groups.
There's the desparate ones who kind of fell into it and they probably honestly think that the man will leave his wife (most cases he won't) and they just let themselves get strung along...
And then there are the sluts, who say they do it because they don't like strings and all they want is the sex and thrill, but the truth is in the end they're just as sad as the woman who's getting strung along.
So pathetic. Women who search for "power" and self esteem by landing a man or taking him from someone else will never truly be happy.
Must be nice to be perfect. Congrats.
Don't we have a medal for her somewhere?0 -
"Side chicks" are a particularly sad breed of woman. In my experience, they break down into two groups.
There's the desparate ones who kind of fell into it and they probably honestly think that the man will leave his wife (most cases he won't) and they just let themselves get strung along...
And then there are the sluts, who say they do it because they don't like strings and all they want is the sex and thrill, but the truth is in the end they're just as sad as the woman who's getting strung along.
So pathetic. Women who search for "power" and self esteem by landing a man or taking him from someone else will never truly be happy.
Must be nice to be perfect. Congrats.
^^This. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but nobody's perfect - everyone makes mistakes, and we can all rationalize something that's wrong as being okay when we want to. And a lot of the women who either knowingly or unknowingly end up as the side chick have no malicious intent in mind, or desire to hurt the wife/girlfriend, etc. Are they being selfish, sure, maybe...but until you've walked in their shoes, don't judge.
And to the poster on page 9 (StazzyBoo) who couldn't seem to get her point across without dropping multiple swear words left and right, that's just unnecessary. I'm sure you have made some mistakes in your life too that you wouldn't feel too good about if someone was swearing about you in that way. And no offense, but you're only 23, you haven't even begun to gain life experince as an adult yet - you're just a baby still. And really, your anger should be directed at the men who cheat, not the side chicks. If the guy is a good guy, then no matter what temptation in front of him, he won't cheat. And guess what, if the guy is bound and determined to cheat, one girl saying no because he's with someone will just make him go on the next girl who's willing. And a lot of times it's more involved than just cheating to cheat. Feelings are involved. Ever been in love with more than one person? It sucks, and not everything is cut and dry about what's right and wrong when it comes to matters of the heart.0 -
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I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.
JQ - That is so very very true. Given my situation, my ex is STILL friends with the lazy *kitten* woman he cheated on me with. She's tried every trick in the book. My ex even speaks to her disrespectfully aswell, yet she still lives in this fantasy land of thinking she's with him because they spend the majority of the time together. Yes, some people would say I'm the pathetic one for not standing up - I have - they have never been a couple or she's never been a bit on the side, however he cheated on me twice with her.
With her, she just doesn't care about others feelings or that he WAS with me. I know it takes two to play tango, but in all honesty, he really didn't or even doesn't give two ***** about her and in recent times has tried to loosen ties with her in the sense of completely staying out of her way. Anyways, we haven;t separated because of her - its other issues. But she really has not helped over the years. IN fact on one occasion shortly after my son was born, I was so close to calling on her doorstep and giving her absolute grief, but decided she wasn't worth it. Nevermind the fact that a 90lb me getting argumentative with a 250lb+ Other Woman probably wouldn't have gone in my favour. lol!. I can get even in other ways, not that that's me or how I work at all.0 -
Ive been with my guy for 6 yrs, and the WOMAN he cheated on me with for a yr off and on was his friends mom!!
This was about 3 yrs ago so yea, I also knew around the time it started and finally stopped..
And the B-I-T-C-H knew that we were together and how i felt
bout him but o well she seduced him with money and drugs. HOW DID WE MAKE IT TO 6 YRS? HE FINALLY CONFESSED WHEN HE RALIZED HE LOVED ONLY ME, LEFT HER AND ALL HIS FRIENDS HE USE TO KICK IT WITH. AND IS ONLY WITH ME NOW AND A FEW SELECT FRIENDS WE MADE TOGETHER AND NEVER AROUND NE CHICS. HES A GOOD BOY NOW
SO PPL CAN CHANGE BUT YEA O WELL, HE DID WHAT HE DID, I GOT HIM BACK FOR IT AND NOW WERE DOIN BETTER.. F-U-C-K SIDE S-L-U-T-S!!! IF U R ONE U REALLY HURT A RELATIONSHIP TO ALL HELL!!!
Wow I'm not even sure what you are saying here,I read it sober took three shots and still don't know.So who's insecure the women that will sleep with a married man or the wives that let themselves be treated like that and still say everything is "fine" with their man.......even though he can never hang out with " NE" chics.
Edit for freaking auto correct0 -
On a different note
Having strong feelings for someone in a relationship sucks.
Don't want to mess with their relationship, so you leave it alone, but you want to be happy. And accept friendship as being enough, when it really isn't at the time.0 -
Yes to this. Never been the side chick and never will be. I've known a few and all of them have problems with self esteem (I've never known a side chick or dude who didn't know either). But with that said, I wouldn't blame or get too mad at the side chick if my guy was cheating--he's the one in the "committed" relationship. Have some courage and break up before you move on to someone else. A man or women who cheats puts their partner in danger of possibly contracting a VD from #3 not good and really cowardly. Your forcing your partner to have sex with #3 without his/her consent---not cool. Just break up if you're not happy.I personally would not ever be the side chick because I know what it feels like to be cheated on, and would never want to make someone else feel like that!
girl code.
nuff said!
Its irresponsible and just not safe. But I guess when You don't care about anyone but yourself, those important details like VD, AIDS, and babies are put on the back burner. No one thinks about the unsuspecting wife/husband, their body, their health, their psyche and mental health once they discover the indiscretion. I've seen it happen to ppl, it can be very traumatic. But KARMA is very efficient and comes when you least expect it. Therefore one day the cheaters and side pieces will fully understand the pain. They will never understand until then0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1kT4u_D5PA
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