Is Partying Worth It?

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malavika413
malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
in Chit-Chat
Hey y'all. I'm just asking a question to the peanut gallery, trying to get a variety of opinions.

I'm nearly 20 and a college student. I have a lot of friends that like to party on the weekends (dorm parties, since there's no greek life at my school), and they always invite me. I've never gone, but I'm very curious. However, there are a few reasons that I've held back. I've never had a sip of alcohol in my life, so I don't know how I'd react to it. I don't know what to wear. I have a boyfriend that's very against alcohol and partying, and I'd either have to go behind his back or go knowing he'd be worried about me and my safety. Also, most girls go to parties to flirt with guys, which would dismay my boyfriend. I'm not attractive, so no one would hit on me, but still.

Is it worth going to a college party at least once? My friends really want me to go and experience it, and I am curious. What do you think?
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Replies

  • McBoffin
    McBoffin Posts: 76 Member
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    You're only young once. If you don't you're simply confirming that youth is wasted on the young ;-)
  • SmartAlec03211988
    SmartAlec03211988 Posts: 1,896 Member
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    I never went to a college party and I don't regret it one bit.
  • fobs13
    fobs13 Posts: 1,080 Member
    edited November 2014
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    Do what you feel. You are young to be worrying about upsetting a boyfriend. Let him have his moral code and you yours. Don't let someone control your life at 20.You can go to a party and not drink alcohol and have fun too as an option. Wear what you want and feel good in.
  • NolanEP84
    NolanEP84 Posts: 2
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    Go. Just get your own drink(s) and pace yourself with something simple like a can of beer. Mixed stuff at parties can be pretty strong, even though you can't taste the alcohol. It's a fun way to socialize and meet new people. If you're worried about safety, like I said, keep it simple, pace yourself and stay near a friend at all times if possible. Women generally don't need as much to drink as men, depending on your overall size, I'd say no more than 2 or 3 for your first time drinking. If you pace yourself, you'll feel the changes physically. Your face (or you) will feel a little warm and you'll probably become less self conscious than you might be otherwise. That funny feeling is the "buzz" people refer to and depending on the drink and experience level, it might not take as much as people think. Sometimes for me, it's as many as 5 or 6 beers and other times, like on less food in the belly, 3 or 4. I'm drunk at about 8 or 9, but I def wouldn't reccommend that much for you lol
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
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    fobs13 wrote: »
    Do what you feel. You are young to be worrying about upsetting a boyfriend. Let him have his moral code and you yours. Don't let someone control your life at 20.You can go to a party and not drink alcohol and have fun too as an option. Wear what you want and feel good in.

    Since BF wouldn't be with me, it feels like cheating to wear typical 'party apparel'. Does anyone party in an oversized sweater?
  • MaddyT122
    MaddyT122 Posts: 152 Member
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    fobs13 wrote: »
    Do what you feel. You are young to be worrying about upsetting a boyfriend. Let him have his moral code and you yours. Don't let someone control your life at 20.You can go to a party and not drink alcohol and have fun too as an option. Wear what you want and feel good in.

    ^This
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
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    MaddyT122 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    Do what you feel. You are young to be worrying about upsetting a boyfriend. Let him have his moral code and you yours. Don't let someone control your life at 20.You can go to a party and not drink alcohol and have fun too as an option. Wear what you want and feel good in.

    ^This

    I just don't know if it's right to betray his trust for the sake of a party I may or may not like.
  • Anahita_Swims
    Anahita_Swims Posts: 4,127 Member
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    if you don't like it leave?
  • fobs13
    fobs13 Posts: 1,080 Member
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    malavika413 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    Do what you feel. You are young to be worrying about upsetting a boyfriend. Let him have his moral code and you yours. Don't let someone control your life at 20.You can go to a party and not drink alcohol and have fun too as an option. Wear what you want and feel good in.

    Since BF wouldn't be with me, it feels like cheating to wear typical 'party apparel'. Does anyone party in an oversized sweater?

    Gosh will go to a party in glamorous partywear now at 44 and dont worry about what my husband would think if not with me. Never cast me a thought at 20. Your boyfriend shoukd trust you enough not to worry about your attire.
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
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    Anahita_Swims wrote: »
    if you don't like it leave?

    I'd be leaving alone in that case, my friends like to party late into the night, I'd be safer waiting for them. It's not wise to walk around my campus late at night, alone.
  • Anahita_Swims
    Anahita_Swims Posts: 4,127 Member
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    malavika413 wrote: »
    Anahita_Swims wrote: »
    if you don't like it leave?

    I'd be leaving alone in that case, my friends like to party late into the night, I'd be safer waiting for them. It's not wise to walk around my campus late at night, alone.

    sounds like a worrying place to be ask security to walk you or take you phone and phone some one while you walk with a torch :)
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
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    fobs13 wrote: »
    malavika413 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    Do what you feel. You are young to be worrying about upsetting a boyfriend. Let him have his moral code and you yours. Don't let someone control your life at 20.You can go to a party and not drink alcohol and have fun too as an option. Wear what you want and feel good in.

    Since BF wouldn't be with me, it feels like cheating to wear typical 'party apparel'. Does anyone party in an oversized sweater?

    Gosh will go to a party in glamorous partywear now at 44 and dont worry about what my husband would think if not with me. Never cast me a thought at 20. Your boyfriend shoukd trust you enough not to worry about your attire.

    He does trust me, but I feel I wouldn't be sending the right message in party clothes like a dress or tights. I feel it's more appropriate for me to wear oversized, baggy clothes--since I'm taken.
  • Anahita_Swims
    Anahita_Swims Posts: 4,127 Member
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    Im only suggesting it because you sound like your curious... go check it out... don't worry about what your friends think you don't have to drink if you don't want to take a bottle of water in you handbag I drink a lot of water when out always have I mean i get wasted with shots too but always drink water....

    your having to new experiences...

    The party thing the likelhood is you will have fun and giggle at your friend while you watch them get tipsy if you staying sober :)

    Or you will be bored to tears...

    I wouldn't recomend a college party as the place you have your first drink ... unless you want to get wasted as some where you don't feel confident with :)

  • Anahita_Swims
    Anahita_Swims Posts: 4,127 Member
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    malavika413 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    malavika413 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    Do what you feel. You are young to be worrying about upsetting a boyfriend. Let him have his moral code and you yours. Don't let someone control your life at 20.You can go to a party and not drink alcohol and have fun too as an option. Wear what you want and feel good in.

    Since BF wouldn't be with me, it feels like cheating to wear typical 'party apparel'. Does anyone party in an oversized sweater?

    Gosh will go to a party in glamorous partywear now at 44 and dont worry about what my husband would think if not with me. Never cast me a thought at 20. Your boyfriend shoukd trust you enough not to worry about your attire.

    He does trust me, but I feel I wouldn't be sending the right message in party clothes like a dress or tights. I feel it's more appropriate for me to wear oversized, baggy clothes--since I'm taken.

    then go in jeans and a t-shirt?
  • malavika413
    malavika413 Posts: 474 Member
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    Anahita_Swims wrote: »
    malavika413 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    malavika413 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    Do what you feel. You are young to be worrying about upsetting a boyfriend. Let him have his moral code and you yours. Don't let someone control your life at 20.You can go to a party and not drink alcohol and have fun too as an option. Wear what you want and feel good in.

    Since BF wouldn't be with me, it feels like cheating to wear typical 'party apparel'. Does anyone party in an oversized sweater?

    Gosh will go to a party in glamorous partywear now at 44 and dont worry about what my husband would think if not with me. Never cast me a thought at 20. Your boyfriend shoukd trust you enough not to worry about your attire.

    He does trust me, but I feel I wouldn't be sending the right message in party clothes like a dress or tights. I feel it's more appropriate for me to wear oversized, baggy clothes--since I'm taken.

    then go in jeans and a t-shirt?

    That's a good idea. I have plenty of baggy t-shirts, that would work.
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,575 Member
    edited November 2014
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    Dude, wear what you want to a party. Experience life, have a drink, be a person. You could go in a turtle neck and sweatpants if you want. Partying isn't just about showing cleavage and flirting, it's about celebration, making new friends, and being young.

    You could also have your own party, with your boyfriend and friends. Have some wine, eat some food, dance and laugh.

    Lighten up! You don't have to drink if you don't want to.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    edited November 2014
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    malavika413 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    malavika413 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    Do what you feel. You are young to be worrying about upsetting a boyfriend. Let him have his moral code and you yours. Don't let someone control your life at 20.You can go to a party and not drink alcohol and have fun too as an option. Wear what you want and feel good in.

    Since BF wouldn't be with me, it feels like cheating to wear typical 'party apparel'. Does anyone party in an oversized sweater?

    Gosh will go to a party in glamorous partywear now at 44 and dont worry about what my husband would think if not with me. Never cast me a thought at 20. Your boyfriend shoukd trust you enough not to worry about your attire.

    He does trust me, but I feel I wouldn't be sending the right message in party clothes like a dress or tights. I feel it's more appropriate for me to wear oversized, baggy clothes--since I'm taken.

    There's something very wrong if you think that taking pride in your appearance is like cheating...
  • Ang108
    Ang108 Posts: 1,711 Member
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    I think you should just stay at home. It seems that you really don't want to go, don't want trouble with your boyfriend and object ( at least that is how I read it from your answers ) in general to the experience. You will have decades yet to live your life and I think in the grand scheme of things it makes absolutely no difference if you went to a dorm party, or not, especially if you really won't enjoy it much to begin with.
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,575 Member
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    malavika413 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    malavika413 wrote: »
    fobs13 wrote: »
    Do what you feel. You are young to be worrying about upsetting a boyfriend. Let him have his moral code and you yours. Don't let someone control your life at 20.You can go to a party and not drink alcohol and have fun too as an option. Wear what you want and feel good in.

    Since BF wouldn't be with me, it feels like cheating to wear typical 'party apparel'. Does anyone party in an oversized sweater?

    Gosh will go to a party in glamorous partywear now at 44 and dont worry about what my husband would think if not with me. Never cast me a thought at 20. Your boyfriend shoukd trust you enough not to worry about your attire.

    He does trust me, but I feel I wouldn't be sending the right message in party clothes like a dress or tights. I feel it's more appropriate for me to wear oversized, baggy clothes--since I'm taken.

    I'm taken and I wear what I want. My boyfriend is fine with that, if he wasn't we wouldn't be together.
  • moogplayer
    moogplayer Posts: 542 Member
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    Definitely go. You gotta experience it at least once. And to me what you wear is unimportant. Just don't cave in to peer pressure to guzzle down booze - you'll pay for it because your body isn't used to it. Alcohol isn't for everyone so you shouldn't be judged if you drink or don't. And if you choose not to be a drinker/partier, it's gonna be tough to maintain a relationship with one who does. Best of luck to you --

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