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I grant then ruin someone's wish...

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  • sw33tp3a11
    sw33tp3a11 Posts: 4,646 Member
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    Granted. Your wit is known to be the best in the whole prison block

    I wish for someone to make me breakfast
  • LovingLifeInCalifornia
    LovingLifeInCalifornia Posts: 9,362 Member
    edited February 2015
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    Eta: I was too slow. This is in response to @jaymvita‌

    Granted. A meetup group consisting of only the most annoying people showed up with the most disgusting batch of coffee and spoiled pie. Yum.

    I wish I wasn't such a procrastinator.
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
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    sw33tp3a11 wrote: »
    Granted. Your wit is known to be the best in the whole prison block

    I wish for someone to make me breakfast

    Granted, you're now breakfast for a cannibal tribe in darkest Papua. Bon appetit.

    I wish prison was kinder to me.
  • sw33tp3a11
    sw33tp3a11 Posts: 4,646 Member
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    jaymvita wrote: »
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: thousands of people are gathered on your lawn to hear your next clever joke, because nothing else makes sense to them anymore. You'll have to be their legal guardians, your invisible Canadian girlfriend hates to share you & just broke up with you due to you really over popularity. By text. Cruel love.

    Wish: you could just get settled already

    Granted, a colony of dust mites has just created a settlement on my back. Their population grows rapidly until I'm just a physical host for their thriving mite-ropolis. People are horrified at my living dust mite host appearance and routinely refuse my requests for coffee and pie.

    I wish I had some coffee and pie. With someone. Anyone.

    Granted. You're stuck with me.

    I wish I had a tattoo

  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    edited February 2015
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    sw33tp3a11 wrote: »
    jaymvita wrote: »
    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: thousands of people are gathered on your lawn to hear your next clever joke, because nothing else makes sense to them anymore. You'll have to be their legal guardians, your invisible Canadian girlfriend hates to share you & just broke up with you due to you really over popularity. By text. Cruel love.

    Wish: you could just get settled already

    Granted, a colony of dust mites has just created a settlement on my back. Their population grows rapidly until I'm just a physical host for their thriving mite-ropolis. People are horrified at my living dust mite host appearance and routinely refuse my requests for coffee and pie.

    I wish I had some coffee and pie. With someone. Anyone.

    Granted. You're stuck with me.

    I wish I had a tattoo

    Win! Ahem, I mean what?

    Granted, Herve Villechaize is now your life partner because he owes you a blood debt.

    I wish that reference wasn't lost on so many young people.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,733 Member
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    Granted: the young replace knowing who Herve is by losing knowing who Lady GaGa is. HOW will they go on?!

    Wish: a pop singer would keep her clothes on
  • LovingLifeInCalifornia
    LovingLifeInCalifornia Posts: 9,362 Member
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    Granted, but they are sheer pieces of clothing...so you can still see everything.

    I wish I'd just get up and do stuff!!!!!
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
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    Cindy4FunFit wrote: »
    Granted: the young replace knowing who Herve is by losing knowing who Lady GaGa is. HOW will they go on?!

    Wish: a pop singer would keep her clothes on

    That might destroy too many young people. You're heartless.

    Granted, pop singers keep their clothes on but all male opera singers particularly overweight male tenors over the age of 50 are now raging nudists. Thanks.

    I wish I didn't just throw up in my mouth.
  • Cindy4FunFit
    Cindy4FunFit Posts: 2,733 Member
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    LMAO
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
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    LovingLifeInCalifornia wrote: »
    Granted, but they are sheer pieces of clothing...so you can still see everything.

    I wish I'd just get up and do stuff!!!!!

    Granted, but you get arrested for having random, unnatural and frankly baffling sexual relations with inanimate objects around the neighborhood.

    I wish I didn't just think that up.
  • LovingLifeInCalifornia
    LovingLifeInCalifornia Posts: 9,362 Member
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    Granted. You can't think anything up anymore. Your mind is blank.

    And why am I always now either pregnant or having sex? I'm not a nympho. Lol

    I wish your profile pic showed your face. :)
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
    edited February 2015
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    LovingLifeInCalifornia wrote: »
    Granted. You can't think anything up anymore. Your mind is blank.

    And why am I always now either pregnant or having sex? I'm not a nympho. Lol

    I wish your profile pic showed your face. :)

    I work with what you give me here, lady. I read between the lines. I know what you're really saying. Nudge nudge wink wink LOL

    Granted, I post a pic of my butt since many people tell me they can't tell the difference but the butt pic gets me banned. Good thing my mind is blank now so I don't have to relive that embarrassment.

    I wish I knew why I got banned.
  • cblue315
    cblue315 Posts: 3,836 Member
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    I wish I didn't just throw up in my mouth.[/quote]
    Granted, now you threw up in someone else's mouth. EEEW!

    I wish my snow blower knew how to do the driveway by itself.
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
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    Granted, but it never stopped running and you had to feed it fuel constantly or it would permanently die!

    I wish I had slept last night
  • SojournerThirteen
    SojournerThirteen Posts: 28,204 Member
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    Granted, but it was an elephant pen in India an you got peed on by Elsa

    I wish I didn't have to work so much
  • score45609
    score45609 Posts: 36 Member
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    Granted, but now you are poor living under a bridge.
    I wish people did not suck!
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
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    score45609 wrote: »
    Granted, but now you are poor living under a bridge.
    I wish people did not suck!

    Granted. They don't suck. They blow.

    I wish it didn't itch right here.
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,833 Member
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    Granted, Now you can't feel anything at all right 'THERE'! :o

    I wish I had some Sushi!
  • jaymvita
    jaymvita Posts: 5,787 Member
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    Granted, you're in s deserted island and have no idea how to build a fire.

    AND you forgot your soy sauce.

    I wish I could understand the language of the universe.
  • kloet_22
    kloet_22 Posts: 1,691 Member
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    jaymvita wrote: »
    Granted, you're in s deserted island and have no idea how to build a fire.

    AND you forgot your soy sauce.

    I wish I could understand the language of the universe.

    Granted but now you here every language in the world at the same time all the time all in your head ;)

    I wish I had a cute guy to cuddle with

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