Bad advice thread

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  • undergloom
    undergloom Posts: 531 Member
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    Tell her how you really feel.
  • elephant2mouse
    elephant2mouse Posts: 906 Member
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    Secret to weight loss: If no one sees you eat, the calories don't count ;)
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
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    madhatter2013 wrote: »
    The white bordering the stop sign means it's optional.

    I told an ex that once and he got mad at me for the ticket he got later.

    OK I am rolling on this one!!!! LOL!!!

  • elephant2mouse
    elephant2mouse Posts: 906 Member
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    Use your high beams in fog, it'll help you see better.
  • Stoshew71
    Stoshew71 Posts: 6,553 Member
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    Juicy Fruit Bublegum will take away the smell of alcohol on your breath
  • Bbearhug
    Bbearhug Posts: 20 Member
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    ALWAYS remind a police officer when he pulls you over that your taxes pay his salary.
  • Carbsmakefat
    Carbsmakefat Posts: 89 Member
    edited January 2015
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    if he doesn't call back, just keep leaving message after message after message and then text a few times to make sure he got your message. Don't give up. That makes him know you are really interested and men love that.
  • EZDUZIT68
    EZDUZIT68 Posts: 1,168 Member
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    When a woman with a large belly enters a room, Its considered proper etiquette to congratulate her and ask her when the due date is.
  • francesmarieg
    francesmarieg Posts: 75 Member
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    Girls LOVE it when you ask them for nudes during your FIRST texting conversation!
  • EZDUZIT68
    EZDUZIT68 Posts: 1,168 Member
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    francesmarieg wrote: »
    Girls LOVE it when you ask them for nudes during your FIRST texting conversation!

    Is that implying its OK to ask on the second or third texting conversation? Just asking... :)
  • francesmarieg
    francesmarieg Posts: 75 Member
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    EZDUZIT68 wrote: »
    francesmarieg wrote: »
    Girls LOVE it when you ask them for nudes during your FIRST texting conversation!

    Is that implying its OK to ask on the second or third texting conversation? Just asking... :)

    Hahahaha!!!! Personally... I'd never send nudes, EVER! But you'd be surprised how many times I've been asked for them on MFP!
  • Bbearhug
    Bbearhug Posts: 20 Member
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    ALWAYS remind a police officer when he pulls you over that your taxes pay his salary.
    Carbsmakefat wrote: »
    if he doesn't call back, just keep leaving message after message after message and then text a few times to make sure he got your message. Don't give up. That makes him know you are really interested and men love that.


    hahahahha when Jon Favreau did that in Swingers

  • undergloom
    undergloom Posts: 531 Member
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    Being a TSA agent is a boring and monotonous job; lighten up an agent's day by making a joke about having a bomb.
  • Bbearhug
    Bbearhug Posts: 20 Member
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    Secret to weight loss:

    If no one sees you eat it, the calories don't count.
  • joshua3179
    joshua3179 Posts: 2,882 Member
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    You know even anne frank could see that and she was blind AND deaf!!
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
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    Secret to a happy marriage?
    Nagging :heart_eyes:
  • SojournerThirteen
    SojournerThirteen Posts: 28,204 Member
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    Oh, and that Super Glue is really a gimmick... I'll show you. Just put a lot on your hands and place them over your ears and hold them there for 5 mins. The crap won't hold. Trust me!
  • thefatveganchef
    thefatveganchef Posts: 89 Member
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    mrsmartinez99 wrote: »
    Flirting with a cop will get you out of a ticket, remember to unbutton your shirt a little
    ...especially if you are a guy.
  • techgal128
    techgal128 Posts: 719 Member
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    AntRobertson wrote: »
    If at first you don't succeed just give up, because that *kitten*'s hard.

    Buahahaha. I like this one.
  • mrsmartinez99
    mrsmartinez99 Posts: 1,255 Member
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    Remember to post on Facebook when you are on vacation, don't forget to leave the exact moment you will return.

    **Also remember to post the picture of your new big screen TV, everyone will be envious.

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