Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))
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berlynnwall wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »berlynnwall wrote: »Hi from page 1246! Im reading and trying to catch up, it may take a while.
I miss you guys. I have been having a bit of a rough time. I'm seeing a trend of this as I read through. I hope everyone is doing alright, and I will check in as I can.
What's wrong? I hope everything is ok......
Everything is OK. My mom had back surgery, and then a few days later had a stroke. She is alright, but her brain still isn't working quite right. She had a heck of a time trying to explain things to the ER, and my brother (who was with her at the time) called my sister instead of me.No one called me at all until like 4 days later. I had no clue.
My sister went to the hospital, and before she left, she dropped a bag of drugs somewhere in the exam room. When my mom tried to leave the hospital the next morning, cops were waiting outside to arrest her, because when the hospital staff cleaned her room, they found a bunch of heroin. She was super upset and scared about her brain issue, and then almost got arrested. She was banned from that hospital! I mean, really. Does no one have any common sense? I swear to goodness that I was switched at birth.
I am so sorry to hear this! Is your brother normally like that? I can't believe your sister would do that >.<
Don't most drug addicts pay attention to where their drugs are at all times??
Sorry I did not see this earlier, I did not ready anything this morning when I posted, I do not want you to think I passed by this post, I just saw it now!
It's ok, Im kind of in and out of here. I'm having trouble finding a moment to sit down and relax.
Thanks. My brother is not normally a flake, but unfortunately he is also on drugs. And he is only 21. I'm the only one out of the three of us that never got addicted to any substances. I think my sister was really upset about my mom and just wasn't paying close attention to where her stuff was. I'm sure she noticed later and was mad as heck at herself. (that she lost it, not that she caused my mom more trouble. She never forgets to be self centered ).
I only have a minute, so I want to thank everyone else who expressed sympathy/frustration for my situation too. You guys are awesome. Im going to try to read a bit more before I have to go do something else. One day I will catch up!
Wow, that is terrible that they are both like that! You should be very proud of yourself for staying on the straight and narrow, that is not always easy when surrounded like that!
Thank you. We had a pretty rough childhood, and none of us escaped with great mental health. I on purpose didn't try any hard substances, because I was afraid it would be too easy to fall into it. I have my own issues, but drugs are not one of them.
It is so important to recognize that. I have explained to my daughter a million times that drugs will never be something she can do casually, because of her mother being a hard core addict, so better to stay away all together.0 -
I grew up in an area where hunting is very popular. My neighbors were extreme hunters and were always going on these trips. One time I opened a cooler in their backyard, hoping to score some soda... it was full of deer guts. Needless to say I quickly got out of there. The good thing is they ate the food they caught.
... I was that kid who tried to think of ways to free the fish we caught without anyone noticing/getting mad at me. Fresh caught fish is delicious, but I have a hard time killing BUGS!0 -
berlynnwall wrote: »riderfangal wrote: »@berlynnwall How's your Mom. I have been mostly skimming due to time constraints. Not sure if I missed an update
@orangesmarties So nice to see you back this morning!!!
Thanks for asking. My mom is doing OK. A piece of the blood clot that caused her stroke stayed in her lung, so now her lung is full of blood. They may have to put in a drain. I realize those two sentences contradict each other - but her back was so messed up that she is feeling super great after surgery despite the extra issues going on. Once she heals completely from all these problems her life is going to be brand new. Her back really messed up her mobility, but now she can walk everywhere and join us on trips and things.
Great to hear your mom is at least doing better than before. Good luck with the extra blood in her lung.0 -
berlynnwall wrote: »rungirl1973 wrote: »kelly_c_77 wrote: »I forgot to share my latest NSV with you.
I went to a baby shower Saturday, and there was homemade cupcakes, veggies and dip, nuts, chocolate covered pretzel sticks, watermelon, pistachio salad, and candy. I filled 2 small plates with veggies and little bit of dip, 1 pretzel, watermelon, mixed nuts, (just a few) 4 buttermints, (which I shared with Mr. Mo) and a small scoop of pistachio salad. I totally skipped the cupcakes!!! I didn't even feel like I was missing out because everyone that ate one, had blue lips and tongue.
Nice! What is pistachio salad? Sounds yummy.
Instant pistachio pudding mix is combined with whipped topping, miniature marshmallows, crushed pineapple, and nuts. This particular salad had a few too many marshmallows for me. I'm sure everyone makes theirs different, but this one was pretty good and not super heavy.
I thought we were the only people who made that! My mom makes it every Christmas. She calls it "snow salad". LOL
Marshmallows, pudding and whipped cream - yep, salad.
Yea my sister makes that too. I love it. She also makes one with cherry pie filling (it may be the picture below) and that is super tasty too!
My grandma made it at Thanksgiving. She called it Watergate Salad.
Speaking of cherry pie filling - has anyone tried the dessert where you substitute all the liquid ingredients in chocolate cake with a can of cherry pie filling? This is relevant to my interests.
If this is a thing, I need it in my life mouth PDQ.
You can mix most cake mixes with pumpkin (or pureed beans if you're into protein - black beans are actually kind of awesome in brownies because the texture is very dense and fudgey), so I would imagine something pectin-y like cherry pie filling would probably work fine too (heck, there's an old Weight Watchers "recipe" where you mix diet pop with cake mix and it still works.)
I'm not a big cherry fan (I do like fresh ones, but not so much in stuff usually) so I haven't tried it, but I've definitely done some lazy baking with pumpkin and bean and it's totally edible.
You can also sub canned crushed pineapple or applesauce in cake mixes, just use about the same volume it would take for the eggs, oil and water. It is not even an exact science. I did find I still had to add a little water when using canned pumpkin though.
I'll have to try some of these recipes. I have a ton of recipes pinned to Pinterest that I still haven't even looked at.0 -
WestCoastJo82 wrote: »
Yes! Strong lifts 5x5 is the name of the program. If you have a power rack at home you are completely set! (And I'm insanely jealous of you and @ythannah). SL is just two workouts that you alternate - three lifts per workout, 5 sets of 5 reps (except deadlift, that's only one set). A is squat, bench, row and B is squat, overhead press, deadlift. Ideal programming is three times a week, but I only do twice a week sometimes and I'm still steadily progressing. If you download the free app it tells you when and how much to up your weight (which is everytime unless you fail) and will tell you to decrease weight if you fail too many times in a row. Also has a nifty timer built in to make sure you're resting enough between sets.@WestCoastJo82 Can you tell me the name of the lifting program you do? I'm at work with the overly zealous interwebs filter, so I probably can't look it up here. But can you tell me the basic lifts you do? We have a power rack at home and I'm wondering if the lifts are ones I could manage at home.
ETA: Strong Lifts? Is that it?
Perfect! Thanks for the info! I think I'd like to try that out after I finish up with the last 10-12 lbs I wanted to lose. I've never done a dead lift and am irrationally worried about hurting my back somehow... heh... I think I'll watch some videos re: form and such... or just ask Mr. Jenni, cuz he know that stuff. Maybe it can be something we do together!
Don't be afraid! Form videos are your friends, as is starting slow with low weight to get your form correct before you could hurt yourself, and definitely include Mr. Jenni!
I am the clutziest person around, I'm lifting weights many would consider heavy now, and if I can get here damage free, I promise, you can too!
Also, no need to wait (for the last few pounds) to start lifting unless you want to. You can get newbie lifter bonus points even in a deficit. You might not progress as quickly as you could eating at maintenance but you can still get strength gains. I circuit trained all through my weight loss and definitely got stronger.0 -
Italian_Buju wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »Italian_Buju wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »HikeCyclist wrote: »I can't keep any dessert type snacks in my house like cookies or cake or chocolate because I am incapable of eating them in moderation.
You're not alone. I am banning ice cream, cookies, & other desserts for a long time until I can eat them in moderation.
I have no food in my house. No wine, no snacks, no goodies. I can't eat anything in moderation when its in my house.
Yeah, we saw your fridge.....apparently mints are the only thing you can control yourself around, LMAO!
@Italian_Buju I think the mints were for the horses! Hee hee...
Yep! They are horse treats. I hardly ever eat those mints! But the horses. ...they love them. Whenever I give a horse who had never had one for the first time their eyes light up as soon as they bite it.
Do they just swallow them whole? Or do they chew them? I never would have guessed horses would like mints!
They chew them. The first time they try them it takes them a while to figure out how to chew them. They seriously love them.
I need to see this happening......
I third this.0 -
barbecuesauce wrote: »kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »AngryViking1970 wrote: »kellyjellybellyjelly wrote: »pofoster21 wrote: »May not be appropriate for @Susieq_1994!
Confession: I found out last night that a friend I used to work with has just been charged with second-degree murder of his wife, who has been missing since November. I'm having a hard time and am absolutely shocked, and still don't really believe it, even though the police quotes say he's been concealing the body at his home for the past 8 months. It just doesn't seem to compute at all against the person I remember.
This is just horrible. How do people do that? How do people not SMELL the decaying body?
They do smell it and they end up telling the police later that they felt bad for the guy or didn't really think anything of it because he is so nice! Like what happened with John Wayne Gacy.
Ahhh don't get me started on JWG!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dorothea_Puente
This lady was an older serial killer & she basically had a room in her house that they dubbed the killing room. She would board people that had mental, drug, or other issues & then steal their social security. Whenever they would figure out what she was doing she would murder them & then have the other tenants basically do "yard work" which more or less was graves for bodies.
I've seen a few specials on her! She's been on a few different shows on the Investigation Discovery channel! People are insane!
Yes. And this may have come up before, but I love ID. It's my "home alone" channel because my husband thinks it's creepy. LOL
I love the ID Channel. My stepdad always tells my mom that she watches it so she can learn how to murder him. The one day I had it on & my dog was sitting there watching it & I couldn't help but think that she'll murder me in my sleep.
It would appear on an episode Cold Case Files: The Murderous Dog
You're probably joking, but I found this while searching for a news article I read several years ago about a man who was killed by his dog in the same way while duck hunting:
LOL @ the part about arresting the dog.
I bet that man always checks to make sure his gun isn't loaded now.
Does anyone remember that dog a few years ago that went into a store & ran straight up to the pet aisle & stole a dog bone?0 -
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Glinda1971 wrote: »
Wow I am surprised how many of you like that stuff.....you seriously could not pay me to watch something like that, lol0 -
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Confession: there is a teenage girl at my gym whom I would love to tell that if she feels the need to workout with her hair down and wear false eyelashes in order to impress her beau, then it may be time for a new beau. And if she is doing that to impress someone else at the gym, then she definitely needs a new a beau. Either way, I wish she would either make an effort at getting stronger or stay out of my way while I make an effort at getting stronger.
I suppose if I wore false eyelashes, I might leave them on until I got home, but there is no way under the sun that I would try to lift with my hair falling fashionably in my eyes. And leaning on the squat rack isn't exercise.0 -
MelissaPhippsFeagins wrote: »Confession: there is a teenage girl at my gym whom I would love to tell that if she feels the need to workout with her hair down and wear false eyelashes in order to impress her beau, then it may be time for a new beau. And if she is doing that to impress someone else at the gym, then she definitely needs a new a beau. Either way, I wish she would either make an effort at getting stronger or stay out of my way while I make an effort at getting stronger.
I suppose if I wore false eyelashes, I might leave them on until I got home, but there is no way under the sun that I would try to lift with my hair falling fashionably in my eyes. And leaning on the squat rack isn't exercise.
My hair and make up turns into a sweaty mess at the gym! And I only have on makeup if I come from work! !
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raelynnsmama52512 wrote: »So, finally heard back from the director today. She and the psychologist are coming to the house tomorrow at 10:30 to see Raelynn. This whole process just seems weird, but I guess that's what they do.
My son started early childhood intervention at 6 months. They came to the house for quite awhile. He had OT/PT at the house and Speech at a hospital - children's hospital and there was something else (more PT or OT) that we went to a school location for him to receive the therapy. It seems "normal" to me. Hugs. I hope it goes well.0 -
I had a dream last night that I started SL 5x5. I was at the Y and I was completely lost on what to do and what machine to use and NO ONE would help me, they all just continued doing their thing even though I looked like a lost child hiding the clothes rack.
This is my fear. I will get up the courage to start and will be totally lost and no one will help me, so I just take myself back to the cardio stuff because it's easy and I have yet to hurt myself on it.
I have anxiety over this.
You can do this! I'm 4'11" and was started in a weight room in high school PE at age 15. I've lifted off an on since then. Right now I am just getting back into it after a year of not. For the most part I ignore other people but in all the gyms, in all the weight rooms, anytime I've spoken with people or asked a question everyone has been helpful. Sometimes I want to try something new so I'll ask whoever is handy. I'm working on getting daughter comfortable with it too.
I suggest: either (1) watch videos and write a list or (2) use a book or app to make a list of exercises. or (3) hire a trainer for one session for an intro course. This way you go into the weight room with a plan, an idea, and if you get stuck you can ask someone, so how do I do the butterfly press?
Every so often I hire a trainer for a tune up in ideas and form. I tend to be old school, 3 set of 10 repetitions each, when it gets a little comfortable bump up the weight. I try for the last repetition of the set to be the max I could go. As mentioned, this is old school and I am 100% positive that things have changed but it has worked for me so far. I had a lot of "personal training" when I dated a competitive body builder. He was a living sculpture and that is what he had me doing....but that was a long time ago.
I believe in you.
ETA, I use a mixture of free weights and machines. For upper body I use free weights. For lower body I use mostly machines. My knees won't tolerate lunges or squats so I use machines that are sort of similar to get the exercise without messing up my knees. You will figure out what works for you.0 -
MelissaPhippsFeagins wrote: »lilaclovebird wrote: »Confession: I'm struggling with my self image a bit today. I feel unattractive and my self worth is plummeting. I really want to bake something to make myself feel better. Not necessarily eat it, but bake it.
Bake it. Then take it to the nearest fire station and tell them thank you for doing a dangerous job. My brother loves it when people do that. LOL
Pure freaking GENIUS!
I have actually been meaning to thank the vet (for helping with the passing of my dog) and the Sheriff's Department for doing CPR on my uncle for forever when he passed. They seriously never stopped until the ambulance got there. We still lost him but they put in a valiant effort.0 -
@orangesmartie I'm happy you're back! I was wondering where @Susieq_1994 was too? @BZAH10 hasn't been around for a good while now
@lilaclovebird keep your head up you are gorgeous! And I agree with @lois_1989 unfriend him!
@LBuehrle8 and @lois_1989 thank you for your kind words and encouragement. He is unfriended.
Sgt Sexy Pants was just frustrated because of work and motorcycle stuff and kinda took it out on me a little(why we were at odds). When he apologized for that and found out about the picture thing he felt kinda helpless in that situation. Things are better now.
My coworker Carlos said it best:
"From what I've seen of you, anyone dumb enough to let you walk away from them doesn't deserve your time, energy, or thoughts anymore after that point." Sgt. Sexy Pants sent me a text with a ringing endorsement of this statement and I got chocolate.
This statement from Carlos is a HUGE deal to me because he doesn't actually see all that much of me aside from the staff meetings. He also doesn't get along with a lot of the other people we work with.
He also said to go workout because I want to, not because someone made me angry or upset. That motivation only lasts so long and will only get you so far.0 -
Yes to all of these. Especially "I'm a nice guy". There is also "I know how to treat a lady." If you have to advertise that then you probably treat a lady as a possession. UGH.rungirl1973 wrote: »barbecuesauce wrote: »
Develop your passive aggressive detection radar. (Speaking from experience)kellienw335 wrote: »
ETA: I "learned" to date in my 40's. I never "dated" like that before, I didn't know how to do it. It was so fun and cool (and scary) to discover so much about myself. I was always 100% myself and clear that I was looking for a good relationship. I did work hard on keeping good boundaries and only dating men who didn't raise red flags.
What are some red flags for people?
The one's I really looked for:
Very angry/resentful toward someone (i.e., ex, mother, sibling, etc.) even if deserved it should not come out in date #1 or #2.
Pushing for "cuddles" or anything else very quickly.
Not understanding what an appropriate level of activity for a first or second date would be (i.e. writing a song for me after one email exchange, planning a weekend away in another state for a second date.)
Not having an appropriate job for his age (i.e. I am in the middle age dating pool, I want to date someone not support him financially.)
What other red flags come to mind?
Not letting me do things for myself e.g. insisting on ordering something for me instead of letting me order what I want and other weird signs of dominance.
Talking about their ex repeatedly in anyway. Glowing terms can be just as bad as negative ones. My ex girlfriend was so good to me she'd drop everything to make me my favorite dinner and then she'd clean up the entire kitchen.
Treating staff where ever you go badly. I think you can tell a lot about a person by how they treat people who're waiting on them.
Calling too much (I had one guy literally calling me over 30 times in one day) or too little (if you haven't heard from them in a month they're not really interested).
I agree with these and the others listed earlier. Good stuff
I would also add
If you are a mom the guy wanting to be insta-dad. I vaguely mentioned my kids in my profile and more than one man in the first email offered to help raise them. No thank you.
The player who is almost seems like relationship material but fails. He comes so close and is charming and good looking and rich. And them you realize he's flakey as heck. And his almost commitments are insincere and then he tells you he's been divorced twice not just once and was with wife #2 while still with wife #1. And then you let him know no more. You will not be going out with him again.
No projects. He is not there to fix or improve you. You are not there to fix or improve him.
You have to like each other as people and be interested in who that person is. That means no projecting. One man kept trying to put words into my mouth about what I liked and what I did for fun.
Where was this advice when I was dating? You should teach a class! All the single ladies, looking for someone, in this thread should start taking notes!!
I really agree with how does he treat people who are in the service industry. Kindness and human decency are priorities to me.
How does he treat animals?
BIG red flag - is he always the victim and life is not fair and it is always someone else's fault. RUN!!!
So much these! And describes himself as a nice guy--if you really are, you don't need to advertise it.
For me:
-Religious. Haven't yet met a religious man who didn't try to change me or didn't force the issue of my atheism.
-Discusses his ex in any capacity too close to the beginning. Asks about your exes.
-Has hang-ups about purity. More of an issue for you younger girls, but RUN from dudes who are obsessed with knowing about your sexual past or try to make you feel bad for things you've done in the past.
-Too many sexual jokes before you've had sex.
-Pressures you to do anything you're uncomfortable with. ANYTHING. This is a red flag because it shows he doesn't really care about your feelings or anything besides what he wants and needs. Potential rapist.
-Is unwilling to do new things/has a meltdown if plans go awry. I sympathize with this, as I realize it's generally a neurological thing, but I personally can't deal with it. There are many more patient people than me, so if this describes you, ignore me.
-Bad mouths his mom. I would make an exception for someone I got to know somewhat before discussion of childhoods occurred. But then again, people don't generally bring up their drug-addicted child-beating jailbird moms on the first date.
-Brings up a mutual female friend several times on the first "date". That one's self-explanatory, right?
-Wants to stay home and be taken care of. I know there are women in this world for whom a stay-at-home dad is ideal, but I don't ever see myself making the kind of bank it takes for that to happen, yet I keep meeting men like this.
-Is sexist/defends sexist behavior and media. Same with racist behavior and media. Any man who needs to feel like he's above someone by virtue of his birth is horribly insecure (and probably for good reason, since he ain't worth ####).
I'm currently single and currently not looking. One bad marriage was more than enough.
All of these, yup.
The last super religious guy I was involved with, wanted to take me to church with him every Sunday but we had to sit in a certain section because he was a serial cheater and messing around with several other women who sat in other areas of the church. Yeah, great Christian behavior.
So many of your points hit a nerve, I've been involved with that guy. And that one. And that one. Ugh.
"I'm misunderstood" means I was never properly socialized and I expect the world to change to suit me and I will pout and throw fits about how mistreated I am.
This was my ex! He advertised it ALL the time that he was a 'good person' and when I would do good things he would say he was 'rubbing off on me'. Uhm no. I AM a nice person with or without you. You are just some @$$hat who likes to play pretend that he is a good father and a good person.
I just finished typing that and it DEFINITELY put things into perspective.
He also touted the "I don't do casual sex" or "sex on the first date." Okay, well I do/did sometimes and I wont judge you either way. Then when things got sexual in the relationship he proceeded to suggest every form of sexual debauchery that struck his mind. I'm open to MANY things and a lot of what he suggested I had already done.
Later I find out that he "didn't do casual sex" ONLY because he didn't have a place of his own to do it yet.
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I had a dream last night that I started SL 5x5. I was at the Y and I was completely lost on what to do and what machine to use and NO ONE would help me, they all just continued doing their thing even though I looked like a lost child hiding the clothes rack.
This is my fear. I will get up the courage to start and will be totally lost and no one will help me, so I just take myself back to the cardio stuff because it's easy and I have yet to hurt myself on it.
I have anxiety over this.
Awwww I'm sorry you feel this way. Makes me wish I lived nearby to take you. 
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