What nobody tells you about losing weight
Replies
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RelCanonical wrote: »gradchica27 wrote: »Noreenmarie1234 wrote: »A few stores I went to lately don’t even carry my size in pants. The smallest they sell is size 4, which are more like an 8 with vanity sizing. 😩 I got a few gift cards for my birthday to Christopher and banks but their clothes are too big. It’s kind of sad that stores don’t even carry below size 4 anymore because of how overweight the population is.
I'm starting to run into that, which is ridiculous because I'm not even that small. I like Worthington pants from JCPenney for work, but the smallest size they carry (in my local store at least) is 4 and those are getting baggy on me. Plus I need petite, which are even more limited. I can order them, but I hate not being able to try on pants first because 9 times out of 10 they don't fit right in one way or another.
(I know, what a problem to have. But it really is annoying :grumble: )
Yep. I have the same problem...there are a few stores in which I’m a zero, and sometimes those dresses are too big. Yeah, right. I’m 5’4”, 130ish, I am in no way “tiny”, but in some stores for the 30-40 something crowd, it’s hard to find my size (bc it’s too small or bc they don’t carry many).
And I’m not interested in junior’s clothes bc they’re usually cheaply made, often see-through, or the placement of the waist or shoulders is for a teen, not a woman. (Plus the styles don’t speak to me, even if things didn’t fit wonky)
I have a juniors romper and holy cow does it destroy my curves. I look nearly flat chested in it and one thing I am NOT is flat chested, lol.RelCanonical wrote: »gradchica27 wrote: »Noreenmarie1234 wrote: »A few stores I went to lately don’t even carry my size in pants. The smallest they sell is size 4, which are more like an 8 with vanity sizing. 😩 I got a few gift cards for my birthday to Christopher and banks but their clothes are too big. It’s kind of sad that stores don’t even carry below size 4 anymore because of how overweight the population is.
I'm starting to run into that, which is ridiculous because I'm not even that small. I like Worthington pants from JCPenney for work, but the smallest size they carry (in my local store at least) is 4 and those are getting baggy on me. Plus I need petite, which are even more limited. I can order them, but I hate not being able to try on pants first because 9 times out of 10 they don't fit right in one way or another.
(I know, what a problem to have. But it really is annoying :grumble: )
Yep. I have the same problem...there are a few stores in which I’m a zero, and sometimes those dresses are too big. Yeah, right. I’m 5’4”, 130ish, I am in no way “tiny”, but in some stores for the 30-40 something crowd, it’s hard to find my size (bc it’s too small or bc they don’t carry many).
And I’m not interested in junior’s clothes bc they’re usually cheaply made, often see-through, or the placement of the waist or shoulders is for a teen, not a woman. (Plus the styles don’t speak to me, even if things didn’t fit wonky)
I have a juniors romper and holy cow does it destroy my curves. I look nearly flat chested in it and one thing I am NOT is flat chested, lol.
Yep same. I’m 50 and my favorite “mom” stores haves sizes that run larger and styles are looser (like J.Jill). But it’s hard to find age appropriate and work appropriate at Forever 21. For those of you in the same boat, though, H&M has more grown up styles for business casual.
Right now I can wear a size 4 petite at 5’3” 130 pounds. In 1986 at age 17 I weighed 98 pounds and wore a size 3. My 17 year old is 5’2” 95 pounds and wears a size 00. I am grateful that American Eagle carries size 00 for her.
I would love to see some uniformity in women’s clothing sizes! And pockets! More pockets!10 -
RelCanonical wrote: »gradchica27 wrote: »Noreenmarie1234 wrote: »A few stores I went to lately don’t even carry my size in pants. The smallest they sell is size 4, which are more like an 8 with vanity sizing. 😩 I got a few gift cards for my birthday to Christopher and banks but their clothes are too big. It’s kind of sad that stores don’t even carry below size 4 anymore because of how overweight the population is.
I'm starting to run into that, which is ridiculous because I'm not even that small. I like Worthington pants from JCPenney for work, but the smallest size they carry (in my local store at least) is 4 and those are getting baggy on me. Plus I need petite, which are even more limited. I can order them, but I hate not being able to try on pants first because 9 times out of 10 they don't fit right in one way or another.
(I know, what a problem to have. But it really is annoying :grumble: )
Yep. I have the same problem...there are a few stores in which I’m a zero, and sometimes those dresses are too big. Yeah, right. I’m 5’4”, 130ish, I am in no way “tiny”, but in some stores for the 30-40 something crowd, it’s hard to find my size (bc it’s too small or bc they don’t carry many).
And I’m not interested in junior’s clothes bc they’re usually cheaply made, often see-through, or the placement of the waist or shoulders is for a teen, not a woman. (Plus the styles don’t speak to me, even if things didn’t fit wonky)
I have a juniors romper and holy cow does it destroy my curves. I look nearly flat chested in it and one thing I am NOT is flat chested, lol.RelCanonical wrote: »gradchica27 wrote: »Noreenmarie1234 wrote: »A few stores I went to lately don’t even carry my size in pants. The smallest they sell is size 4, which are more like an 8 with vanity sizing. 😩 I got a few gift cards for my birthday to Christopher and banks but their clothes are too big. It’s kind of sad that stores don’t even carry below size 4 anymore because of how overweight the population is.
I'm starting to run into that, which is ridiculous because I'm not even that small. I like Worthington pants from JCPenney for work, but the smallest size they carry (in my local store at least) is 4 and those are getting baggy on me. Plus I need petite, which are even more limited. I can order them, but I hate not being able to try on pants first because 9 times out of 10 they don't fit right in one way or another.
(I know, what a problem to have. But it really is annoying :grumble: )
Yep. I have the same problem...there are a few stores in which I’m a zero, and sometimes those dresses are too big. Yeah, right. I’m 5’4”, 130ish, I am in no way “tiny”, but in some stores for the 30-40 something crowd, it’s hard to find my size (bc it’s too small or bc they don’t carry many).
And I’m not interested in junior’s clothes bc they’re usually cheaply made, often see-through, or the placement of the waist or shoulders is for a teen, not a woman. (Plus the styles don’t speak to me, even if things didn’t fit wonky)
I have a juniors romper and holy cow does it destroy my curves. I look nearly flat chested in it and one thing I am NOT is flat chested, lol.
Yep same. I’m 50 and my favorite “mom” stores haves sizes that run larger and styles are looser (like J.Jill). But it’s hard to find age appropriate and work appropriate at Forever 21. For those of you in the same boat, though, H&M has more grown up styles for business casual.
Right now I can wear a size 4 petite at 5’3” 130 pounds. In 1986 at age 17 I weighed 98 pounds and wore a size 3. My 17 year old is 5’2” 95 pounds and wears a size 00. I am grateful that American Eagle carries size 00 for her.
I would love to see some uniformity in women’s clothing sizes! And pockets! More pockets!
YES POCKETS. Pockets are wonderful, even if the only thing I stick in them are my hands.
My weight gain throughout most of my life coincided with a lot of vanity sizing, so I actually stayed about the same size (about a 14 - 15 in juniors) until I started working full-time and REALLY started gaining ahead of the curve, lol.
I've been on a thrifting kick so that's where I'm getting most of my clothes right now.5 -
concordancia wrote: »
Bizarrely I noticed that I became more invisible to men in my late 40's (when both fat and slimmer) but now I'm in my 60s I have noticed the odd twinkle again, mostly from silver foxes - I think maybe it's that some chaps who are widowed or divorced kinda get the feeling that they want someone for company and to do fun stuff with in retirement. I love being active in my 60s and fortunately have a fab husband of 40+ years - I hope that those older guys (and gals) all find someone (could be good friends if they don't want/need a partner) to enjoy their retirement with too.19 -
Nobody told me how much my libido would increase.
I feel like a hormonal teenager again.
🤭17 -
Still not used to scratching my back and feeling bones. I carry a decent amount of weight in my back, especially my upper back, so I'm used to having some kind of fat there. Not the case anymore, kind of feels like I'm wearing something hard over my body, when in reality it's just the bones in my body. It's much more bumpy now and less flat.4
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grinning_chick wrote: »TheMrWobbly wrote: »
There were a myriad of reason why I didn't ask out certain people and it wasn't because of weight or anything else re appearance and most men/boys would be the same.
As someone who didn't have a weight problem until her late 20s, then did, then didn't, then did again, then didn't again, and now is working on not for the last time, I am calling this out.
I have lived it. Enough times now that it wasn't some weird outlier experience or just me being anecdotal. With the same men, even, who were attracted/then not/then attracted again/etc. It most definitely is indeed a thing. It happens. I understand why, which is why I personally don't hold it against those who do it. Their loss, not mine. Bullet = dodged. Etceteras, etceteras, and so on. Whatever I have to tell myself/it takes to make myself feel better and ultimately get over it, since I've been rejected based on my personality just as much as my weight at this point in my life, lol.
At the same time other women may not and I understand why, too. I even possess empathy for overweight or obese men who have been rejected due to degree of adiposity as well. Or looks when not. Or something else physical/tangible. It may not be as prevalent, but some women value/rank initial visual sexual attraction just as high as some men. Whatevs.
You - YOU - may not be that way, sure. But must I really have to type in 2019 that of *course* it's #NotAllMen? Kinda been a given, that one, since, oh, 2017 or so. But there are indeed enough for whom it is true that you cannot dismiss out of hand multiple women's experiences with a post like this. Well, you can try; but then it generates responses like this.
As far as men hitting on women based on their size, of course this is a thing, but it also has a lot to do with self-confidence and the location and culture you live in. My town is consistently ranked as one of the most obese cities in America, and I used to get plenty of men leaping to hold doors for me and smile when I weighed nearly 300 lbs. I think the main thing that has changed since losing weight is that now a different kind of men do the same thing - slimmer, more athletic guys that I wouldn’t have considered in my dating class previously. It also matters that since losing weight I have started wearing nicer clothes, makeup, doing my nails, wearing heels, and generally sending more signals that I care about my appearance.21 -
That you may be super sad to see summer ending. When I was obese and overweight, I HATED spring and especially summer, because I couldn't "hide" my body as much with big baggy heavy clothes, coats and jackets when I was obese...because it was too uncomfortable to do so (hide my obese body with lots of layers and outer-wear, because of the hotter weather., it was ALWAYS so hard for me to find cute clothes that fit, felt and looked good on me/my body and thereby HATED hanging out and enjoying the spring and summer beautiful weather, because I always felt so big and outta of place and gross. I much preferred cooler and colder weather, because again...I could puts lots of layers of clothes on, cover up more with heavier baggier clothes. Once I became slim and trim, I discovered how very much I LOVE spring and especially summer now and the hotter the weather, the better to/for me, because I feel much more comfortable (in my skin) wearing shorts and shorter skirts and dresses and feel not only gorgeous and cute but no longer self-conscience and outta place and quite frankly TACKY, as I did when I was obese and overweight. Now that I'm slim, I'm sorry summer is coming to close AND yet still SUPER looking forward to fall and winter, but for totally different reasons from when I was obese and overweight, now that I'm slim and trim.13
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Well here are things that surprise me being down 73 pounds, 9 more to goal. The strangest is I'm cold more often, I mean cold in situations I would not have been before. I used to wear a regular old flannel all winter, I'm already looking for warmer clothes and jackets/coats because I know I'm gonna be freezing.
Next is the confidence that builds the more and more you lose weight. Its rocket fuel losing weight and you just want to keep going. Not cocky, not making you a jerk or it shouldn't, just confidence.
Another thing is buying clothes. Its expensive to lose a lot of weight. I have gone from 46 size jeans to 38 size jeans. Shirts from 3X to XL/L depending on the clothes company. That all costs money along with healthy food costs a bit more than McDonald's.
The other thing that surprised me VERY much and I'll try and be very delicate here. I am married and I love my wife more than anything on Earth. It surprises me how often we both want to be intimate and how much better it is. Sorry I hope i didn't offend anyone with that. I tried to be as delicate as I could. I'll leave it at that.19 -
Nobody told me how much my libido would increase.
I feel like a hormonal teenager again.
🤭
Holy cow I am not the only one then. It's insane the difference. My wife and I both want it more often. My wife has lost 30 pounds or so and I am 73 down. Not only do we do it more but it's insanely better quality. That should be enough motivation for anyone.15 -
Cavallaro65 wrote: »Well here are things that surprise me being down 73 pounds, 9 more to goal. The strangest is I'm cold more often, I mean cold in situations I would not have been before. I used to wear a regular old flannel all winter, I'm already looking for warmer clothes and jackets/coats because I know I'm gonna be freezing.
Next is the confidence that builds the more and more you lose weight. Its rocket fuel losing weight and you just want to keep going. Not cocky, not making you a jerk or it shouldn't, just confidence.
Another thing is buying clothes. Its expensive to lose a lot of weight. I have gone from 46 size jeans to 38 size jeans. Shirts from 3X to XL/L depending on the clothes company. That all costs money along with healthy food costs a bit more than McDonald's.
The other thing that surprised me VERY much and I'll try and be very delicate here. I am married and I love my wife more than anything on Earth. It surprises me how often we both want to be intimate and how much better it is. Sorry I hope i didn't offend anyone with that. I tried to be as delicate as I could. I'll leave it at that.
Awww. Offended that you guys are having lots of happy sexy time? That would be on us, not you.23 -
kenyonhaff wrote: »Cavallaro65 wrote: »Well here are things that surprise me being down 73 pounds, 9 more to goal. The strangest is I'm cold more often, I mean cold in situations I would not have been before. I used to wear a regular old flannel all winter, I'm already looking for warmer clothes and jackets/coats because I know I'm gonna be freezing.
Next is the confidence that builds the more and more you lose weight. Its rocket fuel losing weight and you just want to keep going. Not cocky, not making you a jerk or it shouldn't, just confidence.
Another thing is buying clothes. Its expensive to lose a lot of weight. I have gone from 46 size jeans to 38 size jeans. Shirts from 3X to XL/L depending on the clothes company. That all costs money along with healthy food costs a bit more than McDonald's.
The other thing that surprised me VERY much and I'll try and be very delicate here. I am married and I love my wife more than anything on Earth. It surprises me how often we both want to be intimate and how much better it is. Sorry I hope i didn't offend anyone with that. I tried to be as delicate as I could. I'll leave it at that.
Awww. Offended that you guys are having lots of happy sexy time? That would be on us, not you.
Thank you very much. I just didn't know if you were allowed to if you could talk about things like that in these forums. Its all good.5 -
Cavallaro65 wrote: »kenyonhaff wrote: »Cavallaro65 wrote: »Well here are things that surprise me being down 73 pounds, 9 more to goal. The strangest is I'm cold more often, I mean cold in situations I would not have been before. I used to wear a regular old flannel all winter, I'm already looking for warmer clothes and jackets/coats because I know I'm gonna be freezing.
Next is the confidence that builds the more and more you lose weight. Its rocket fuel losing weight and you just want to keep going. Not cocky, not making you a jerk or it shouldn't, just confidence.
Another thing is buying clothes. Its expensive to lose a lot of weight. I have gone from 46 size jeans to 38 size jeans. Shirts from 3X to XL/L depending on the clothes company. That all costs money along with healthy food costs a bit more than McDonald's.
The other thing that surprised me VERY much and I'll try and be very delicate here. I am married and I love my wife more than anything on Earth. It surprises me how often we both want to be intimate and how much better it is. Sorry I hope i didn't offend anyone with that. I tried to be as delicate as I could. I'll leave it at that.
Awww. Offended that you guys are having lots of happy sexy time? That would be on us, not you.
Thank you very much. I just didn't know if you were allowed to if you could talk about things like that in these forums. Its all good.
We're an 18-and-up website. We do try to keep things "clean" though. I think the comment was about as squeeky clean and wholesome comment about sex as one can get.11 -
Cavallaro65 wrote: »kenyonhaff wrote: »Cavallaro65 wrote: »Well here are things that surprise me being down 73 pounds, 9 more to goal. The strangest is I'm cold more often, I mean cold in situations I would not have been before. I used to wear a regular old flannel all winter, I'm already looking for warmer clothes and jackets/coats because I know I'm gonna be freezing.
Next is the confidence that builds the more and more you lose weight. Its rocket fuel losing weight and you just want to keep going. Not cocky, not making you a jerk or it shouldn't, just confidence.
Another thing is buying clothes. Its expensive to lose a lot of weight. I have gone from 46 size jeans to 38 size jeans. Shirts from 3X to XL/L depending on the clothes company. That all costs money along with healthy food costs a bit more than McDonald's.
The other thing that surprised me VERY much and I'll try and be very delicate here. I am married and I love my wife more than anything on Earth. It surprises me how often we both want to be intimate and how much better it is. Sorry I hope i didn't offend anyone with that. I tried to be as delicate as I could. I'll leave it at that.
Awww. Offended that you guys are having lots of happy sexy time? That would be on us, not you.
Thank you very much. I just didn't know if you were allowed to if you could talk about things like that in these forums. Its all good.
I think as long as you keep it tasteful (which you did perfectly), it's totally fine to talk about adult-related things here, as long as they pertain to the theme of the site (which you did as well). We talk a lot about bodily functions as well, lol.10 -
Thanks guys, I did try to be a delicate as possible so thank you for noticing.
Another thing that surprises me is just how much energy you gain in general. Going for a long walk now, no problem. Going for a jog, no problem. Not only that you sometimes can't wait to do those things. Get the blood flowing and get moving and run. It's really awesome.
Oh and another thing is how much I like getting dressed up now. Not like 10,000 dollar suite but just like dressing nice. We had a nice, real nice wedding last weekend and I had to buy a suit. Not only didn't I mind going out to try on and buy a new suit I didn't mind wearing it. I kinda liked it.
When I was 272 pounds I freaking dreaded, I mean dreaded putting on anything nice. I had one pair of kahkis that fit and I looked like whale in it. So embarrassing thinking back now.
We have a cruise next month and can't wait. Can't wait to cruise and not be fat. Can't wait till formal nights when I actually will dress up and take pictures. I would NOT have done either when I was 272. I would have avoided both like the plague.23 -
That your clothes will get longer when you lose weight. I tried on a dress this morning that was a little loose, but wearable, but the length had changed and I just hated how it fell on me.
I find jeans shopping hard, I've shrunk out of 4s and a lot stores only go to 4. I found some 2s at Goodwill that I like. I have actually found dresses in the Junior's section that fit me fairly well, as I'm also petite. I bought an XS dress at Target I have been so unhappy with because it's just big everywhere. Not like I can buy any smaller in women's clothes.
Intimate time is so much better, I am not sure it is the weight loss so much as the resistance and endurance training along with the weight loss. Not being so out of breath really helps the enjoyment.11 -
Cavallaro65 wrote: »Nobody told me how much my libido would increase.
I feel like a hormonal teenager again.
🤭
Holy cow I am not the only one then. It's insane the difference. My wife and I both want it more often. My wife has lost 30 pounds or so and I am 73 down. Not only do we do it more but it's insanely better quality. That should be enough motivation for anyone.
Amen to all that. Some times I wear a grin all day and I am just in an all-around better mood.
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Ive been working out for 90 days now and its been great!! Already lost 47 pounds!!23
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ExistingFish wrote: »That your clothes will get longer when you lose weight. I tried on a dress this morning that was a little loose, but wearable, but the length had changed and I just hated how it fell on me.
I find jeans shopping hard, I've shrunk out of 4s and a lot stores only go to 4. I found some 2s at Goodwill that I like. I have actually found dresses in the Junior's section that fit me fairly well, as I'm also petite. I bought an XS dress at Target I have been so unhappy with because it's just big everywhere. Not like I can buy any smaller in women's clothes.
It is a bit of a pain, but do you have a friendly local seamstress or tailor?
There is only so much they can do, but it's always worth asking if it's a favourite that would otherwise have to go.1 -
andrewc420 wrote: »Ive been working out for 90 days now and its been great!! Already lost 47 pounds!!
Awesome job! That is hard to do, work out that much.4 -
alteredsteve175 wrote: »Cavallaro65 wrote: »Nobody told me how much my libido would increase.
I feel like a hormonal teenager again.
🤭
Holy cow I am not the only one then. It's insane the difference. My wife and I both want it more often. My wife has lost 30 pounds or so and I am 73 down. Not only do we do it more but it's insanely better quality. That should be enough motivation for anyone.
Amen to all that. Some times I wear a grin all day and I am just in an all-around better mood.
Believe me I know exactly what you mean. Its almost like being born again, your a new person almost.5 -
Cavallaro65 wrote: »Well here are things that surprise me being down 73 pounds, 9 more to goal. The strangest is I'm cold more often, I mean cold in situations I would not have been before. I used to wear a regular old flannel all winter, I'm already looking for warmer clothes and jackets/coats because I know I'm gonna be freezing.
LOL... yeah I went to Florida a couple times for work and I turned the heat on in my hotel room. In July. In Florida. lol
In spite of everyone saying how hot it is there, it was 20 degrees cooler than it was in Texas. so I was pretty cold.
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Cavallaro65 wrote: »Well here are things that surprise me being down 73 pounds, 9 more to goal. The strangest is I'm cold more often, I mean cold in situations I would not have been before. I used to wear a regular old flannel all winter, I'm already looking for warmer clothes and jackets/coats because I know I'm gonna be freezing.
LOL... yeah I went to Florida a couple times for work and I turned the heat on in my hotel room. In July. In Florida. lol
In spite of everyone saying how hot it is there, it was 20 degrees cooler than it was in Texas. so I was pretty cold.
I am absolutely freezing this morning. I mean this is real trouble for the winter if I'm this cold in summer still.4 -
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motivatedmartha wrote: »concordancia wrote: »
Bizarrely I noticed that I became more invisible to men in my late 40's (when both fat and slimmer) but now I'm in my 60s I have noticed the odd twinkle again, mostly from silver foxes - I think maybe it's that some chaps who are widowed or divorced kinda get the feeling that they want someone for company and to do fun stuff with in retirement. I love being active in my 60s and fortunately have a fab husband of 40+ years - I hope that those older guys (and gals) all find someone (could be good friends if they don't want/need a partner) to enjoy their retirement with too.
Agreed about late 40’s.
I believe it happens a few years after menopause as hormones level out.
Partly though, I believe it is also the ‘vibe’ women give off then.
If you are losing a bunch of weight and getting fit you are also rediscovering life is more fun.
Your focus in life changes and some things become clearer.
It’s more about real value and contentment vs fleeting happiness which only time and struggle can teach you.
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Cavallaro65 wrote: »Cavallaro65 wrote: »Well here are things that surprise me being down 73 pounds, 9 more to goal. The strangest is I'm cold more often, I mean cold in situations I would not have been before. I used to wear a regular old flannel all winter, I'm already looking for warmer clothes and jackets/coats because I know I'm gonna be freezing.
LOL... yeah I went to Florida a couple times for work and I turned the heat on in my hotel room. In July. In Florida. lol
In spite of everyone saying how hot it is there, it was 20 degrees cooler than it was in Texas. so I was pretty cold.
I am absolutely freezing this morning. I mean this is real trouble for the winter if I'm this cold in summer still.
Winter is hard.. but at least you have the excuse to layer up. One good go to product is thermal underwear/leggings. You can wear them under jeans.3 -
Cavallaro65 wrote: »Cavallaro65 wrote: »Well here are things that surprise me being down 73 pounds, 9 more to goal. The strangest is I'm cold more often, I mean cold in situations I would not have been before. I used to wear a regular old flannel all winter, I'm already looking for warmer clothes and jackets/coats because I know I'm gonna be freezing.
LOL... yeah I went to Florida a couple times for work and I turned the heat on in my hotel room. In July. In Florida. lol
In spite of everyone saying how hot it is there, it was 20 degrees cooler than it was in Texas. so I was pretty cold.
I am absolutely freezing this morning. I mean this is real trouble for the winter if I'm this cold in summer still.
Winter is hard.. but at least you have the excuse to layer up. One good go to product is thermal underwear/leggings. You can wear them under jeans.
Very true, I do think layering clothes is super cute, especially with a nice jacket. I just realized I need a new winter coat this year unless I want to look like a kid wearing her mother's clothes.4 -
Didn’t even realize how much I love being outside! Even in my own front yard, I’ve been too embarrassed to be seen.15
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Since I've lost a noticeable amount of weight I find myself wondering about other people much more often. Hmmmm she appears to be at a healthy weight. I wonder if she counts calories or does she naturally eat at maintenance? Has she always been at a healthy weight? Hmmmmm he is at an unhealthy weight. I wonder if he cares (wondering because my hubby really truly 100% does not care about his weight). I don't like that I do this. I definitely don't judge ..... I guess I'm just curious because getting healthier is constantly on my mind.16
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So this one is definitely TMI.
But being around 35lbs in (and a lot to go), it's my time of the month. So I needed to wear my underwear in bed. But they were uncomfortable. They've gotten to a looseness where they're fine normally, but in bed, they're not clinging to me enough. It's unpleasant!11
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