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How is the MFPer above going to die?

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Replies

  • NewlifeinNW
    NewlifeinNW Posts: 3,866 Member
    Feeding rabid chipmunks, got bitten
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  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    For bullshixxing the wrong person! They freaked out on her and beat her about the head with a Thighmaster! :grimace:
  • NewlifeinNW
    NewlifeinNW Posts: 3,866 Member
    She had been craving a pair of the Reebok pumps for as long as she could remember. Finally, today was the day! She slid her feet into them and began pumping. The only problem is she was lost in her thoughts and continued to pump and pump. Eventually she cut off the circulation to her feet. They next day they swelled up like balloons and popped when she tried to walk on them. She died days later clutching her beloved pumps to her breast.
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  • let_me_clip_dirty_wings
    let_me_clip_dirty_wings Posts: 2,910 Member
    While binge-watching the TV sitcom Eight Is Enough, the remote falls off the couch, she reaches over to get it, falls from the couch and breaks her neck...
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  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Firey inferno..set fire to her kitchen cooking chips and roasted herself
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Doin the Sexual Mambo With a smile on her face!
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  • let_me_clip_dirty_wings
    let_me_clip_dirty_wings Posts: 2,910 Member
    From a fall reenacting the Chris Farley "Chippindales" dance during the local New Years talent show...
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  • NewlifeinNW
    NewlifeinNW Posts: 3,866 Member
    She was crocheting me a new blanket. It took a long time and she was getting sleepy. Her head began bobbing as she began to fall asleep. One particularly violent head drop resulted in the needle penetrating her eye. Now I'll never get that blanket.
  • ClubSilencio
    ClubSilencio Posts: 2,983 Member
    edited January 2017
    Sudden onset fistula of the anal cavity.
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  • NewlifeinNW
    NewlifeinNW Posts: 3,866 Member
    She was putting away her Griswold worthy light display for the year. Inevitably, a large tangled mess of light strands occurred, in which she got both hands stuck. Stumbling around, the strands got ever tighter until she was stuck. After several days she began hallucinating from hunger and ate the red lights, thinking they were cheries. Died from glass ingestion.
  • Gimsteinn
    Gimsteinn Posts: 7,678 Member
    He was doing handstands on the top of the empire state building... on the edge of the roof.. All of a sudden a sharp wind blows at him and he lost his balance and fell backwards... thank god he fell onto the rough, instead of the other way..
    He was so relieved he felt he was near in mortal so he walked through the wrong neighbourhood.. Close to the airport... a plane was flying over and the pilot lost control of the plane, it crashed on him....
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  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    As one more child called out "momma" her eyes twitched ..her teeth clenched anf "pop" she burst a blood vessel
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  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Someone replaced his bong water with something highly combustible..*kaboom*
  • Gimsteinn
    Gimsteinn Posts: 7,678 Member
    She got lost in the outbacks.. but that wasn't it.. she survived, she's a badass. But then they started to film her story and she got famous.. a stalker got upset and shot her :(
  • NewlifeinNW
    NewlifeinNW Posts: 3,866 Member
    From the dreaded....REEFER MADNESS

    nc0maxjjlexd.jpg
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Trying to sneak into a Reefer Madness Festival
  • NewlifeinNW
    NewlifeinNW Posts: 3,866 Member
    She was playing scrabble when, for the fourth game in a row, she had two of the letter I and two Us. To round out her tiles she had a V, a Z, and a M. She got so angry that she slammed her fist on the board, causing tiles to fly about randomly. After calming down she came back to apologize, slipped on the U tile and fell onto the tile holder, piercing her eye. Her last thought as she faded away was "Damn, VUM is a word...."
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  • RunHardBeStrong
    RunHardBeStrong Posts: 33,069 Member
    She was reaching up into the closet for something when boxes and boxes of legos avalanched down onto her. They found a lego stuck in her throat.
  • NewlifeinNW
    NewlifeinNW Posts: 3,866 Member
    She got drunk at a party and decided to play twister. Unfortunately...left leg green=slip and broken neck on yellow
  • RunHardBeStrong
    RunHardBeStrong Posts: 33,069 Member
    (Ha! I did tear my knee up playing twister one time, I didn't die though!)

    He was jamming to Technotronic, "Move This" one summer day. Windows down, radio up. Dancing like a teenage girl when he ran a red light and bam. They definitely had trouble moving him after that.
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