Obsessive/Unhealthy Dieting Relationship
Replies
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so now people can't do yoga because they're Christian? ?
I just cant..... even deal with this thread anymore. It is literally making me anxious! !-1 -
Christine_72 wrote: »so now people can't do yoga because they're Christian? ?
I just cant..... even deal with this thread anymore. It is literally making me anxious! !
I've never been to a yoga class that emphasized or even mentioned meditation. I'm an atheist so I don't actually care at all, but I'd love to know why this kind of class (every single one I've ever tried out) is morally objectionable. We had to sit still and be quiet at the end, but that hardly constitutes meditation does it? I thought we were just simmering down from some intense physical stress...0 -
I'm genuinely curious OP, is weight loss the only part of your life where there is so much unnecessary stress, excuses for everything, and lack of taking personal responsibility?
I think at this point people are suggesting counselling for reasons other than an eating disorder. This doesn't mean you need to be hospitalized or shell out big money for it. There are plenty of services out there that will charge based on income. You just have to be willing to look for it. If it's not something that you want to do, then just say so. Don't use lack of income as an excuse.
This !
There are many places that offer free or sliding scale mental health help. The op may have to travel out of town or take a long car ride to get to one, but they do exist. But here's the catch..... The person would actually have to WANT the help. They would have to be ready to stop all the excuses and whining and take responsibility for their mental health care. They would have to WANT it. Some people just like to whine and complain, others want results.
Op - post the name of the county you live in and the state and I bet we can have a free or sliding scale mental health center within a reasonable distance. Since you stated that you are not working, it shouldn't matter how far it is anyway. Surely you can buy a bus ticket ?
Here's the thing, if you would've searched for a free or sliding scale mental health center when it was first suggested a long long long long time ago, you would right now already be in treatment and moving forward. But instead you came up with more and more excuses and did not so your in the same place you where when you first started posting these whiny threads.
So do yourself a favor And actually get the help. If you want a better life, you have to work for it. Nobody is going to hand you anything. Nobody has a magic wand to change you. You gotta want it and you gotta work for it.
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Christine_72 wrote: »so now people can't do yoga because they're Christian? ?
I just cant..... even deal with this thread anymore. It is literally making me anxious! !
I've never heard of Christians or Catholics ( both would have bible study like the op mentioned ) not being allowed to practice yoga. This thread is the first time anyone has ever mentioned this in my 38 yrs of being a Catholic. So I'm guessing it is just an excuse. Shocking .-1 -
I cannot afford medical treatment at this time, so unless you are willing to pay for it, stop suggesting that. It's not an option.
YOU asked for help. I gave you a suggestion. And I'll keep suggesting it because it's the only viable answer I can see for you. You don't want to do this, you don't want to that. EVERY SINGLE suggestion that has been given to you by the kind-hearted community here on MFP has been shot down by you. So where does that leave you? Clearly you don't want our help, so who CAN help you? A PROFESSIONAL. Take out a loan. Borrow money from a family member. Get a job. I don't know and I don't care, that's your issue, not mine. I have my own life and family to worry about. But you CAN see someone. You just DON'T WANT TO, just like you don't want to listen to anything anyone else has to suggest.
SO SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP.
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thorsmom01 wrote: »Christine_72 wrote: »so now people can't do yoga because they're Christian? ?
I just cant..... even deal with this thread anymore. It is literally making me anxious! !
I've never heard of Christians or Catholics ( both would have bible study like the op mentioned ) not being allowed to practice yoga. This thread is the first time anyone has ever mentioned this in my 38 yrs of being a Catholic. So I'm guessing it is just an excuse. Shocking .
Pretty sure OP isn't Catholic.
Conservative Christianity (Pentecostal, Evangelical, Charismatic) isn't keen on yoga.
https://www.probe.org/yoga-and-christianity-are-they-compatible/
(above link contains a long article, but it comprehensively explains the Christian reservations about yoga)
Yes, I'm familiar with that argument, which I think is silly, as the reasons yogis in India practiced yoga 3,000 plus years ago are not the same as the vast majority of us today. I utterly reject the idea that practicing yoga will imperil a Christian's soul. I will acknowledge if someone's belief system includes taking everything in the bible literally, then the origins of yoga could indeed pose a conflict.
However, that does not address the OP's objection, which was to possibly encountering meditation in yoga.0 -
thorsmom01 wrote: »Christine_72 wrote: »so now people can't do yoga because they're Christian? ?
I just cant..... even deal with this thread anymore. It is literally making me anxious! !
I've never heard of Christians or Catholics ( both would have bible study like the op mentioned ) not being allowed to practice yoga. This thread is the first time anyone has ever mentioned this in my 38 yrs of being a Catholic. So I'm guessing it is just an excuse. Shocking .
I raised my children in a conservative evangelical church. My adult daughter was concerned about the spiritual aspects. I encouraged her to try it out, ignoring the mantra part. She loves yoga now.
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thorsmom01 wrote: »Christine_72 wrote: »so now people can't do yoga because they're Christian? ?
I just cant..... even deal with this thread anymore. It is literally making me anxious! !
I've never heard of Christians or Catholics ( both would have bible study like the op mentioned ) not being allowed to practice yoga. This thread is the first time anyone has ever mentioned this in my 38 yrs of being a Catholic. So I'm guessing it is just an excuse. Shocking .
Pretty sure OP isn't Catholic.
Conservative Christianity (Pentecostal, Evangelical, Charismatic) isn't keen on yoga.
https://www.probe.org/yoga-and-christianity-are-they-compatible/
(above link contains a long article, but it comprehensively explains the Christian reservations about yoga)
Oh wow ! My apologies . I wasn't aware ( I'm Catholic so didn't know !)-1 -
kshama2001 wrote: »I joined WW when I was employed, and I'm currently on a 2 month free pass for losing 10 pounds in October and November. That's the only reason I am still on WW. Because I'm getting free meetings now.
I'm just feeling burnt out from measuring and tracking.
Since you're unemployed, don't you qualify for a state insurance program? I see you're in New Jersey, which probably isn't too different from my state of Massachusetts. I have a friend with Mass Health who gets free therapy.
Maybe someone from NJ can advise you better.
Lots of therapists are reluctant to work with narcissistic personality disorder if that is what is going on.0 -
Christians or Catholics
Oh, man...
This thread delivers. I've been checking it out all day, strangely compelled to keep looking.
Hats off to you guys offering all this sincere advice, just like Sisyphus with his rock.
That's all, carry on.
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kshama2001 wrote: »I joined WW when I was employed, and I'm currently on a 2 month free pass for losing 10 pounds in October and November. That's the only reason I am still on WW. Because I'm getting free meetings now.
I'm just feeling burnt out from measuring and tracking.
Since you're unemployed, don't you qualify for a state insurance program? I see you're in New Jersey, which probably isn't too different from my state of Massachusetts. I have a friend with Mass Health who gets free therapy.
Maybe someone from NJ can advise you better.
I'm from nj and can offer a complete list of free and sliding scale mental health help. My neighbor actually works at one of the largest low income mental health centers in this state. Even if they can't help, they will refer and set the appt of a place that can .-1 -
The list of free mental health services in nj is so long that I couldn't even begin to list it.
Op - Google these key words - FREE mental health help NJ. They have a state website set up to get you a referred within 24 hrs to free help.
End thread...-1 -
"How will i find time to see someone???? I can only do prayer study, consistently eat more energy than i use, and complain about not being thin. None of you get it!"0
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I have been looking at options for help. I've been in counseling in the past. I've been checking out OA meetings and chatting with a counselor from the NEDA website. I have been following advice from people here. But I'm still not sure what good it's going to do. The person on the NEDA website was really no help. She seemed to be confused as to why I was even on there.
I'm trying to figure out something that will work. Tomorrow, I'm going to try going back to tracking points since I don't have any out-of-home dining planned. However, I'm going to take a different approach. I bought a little 49 cent memo pad at the store and I'll write down what I'm eating on there (including weights of certain foods). Then I'll track it on the app AFTER I eat it- that way I can get an idea of how I'm eating if I'm not focused on the numbers. I think that's one of the reasons I experience burn-out. I try to pre-plan my food, and then when I see the numbers, I get overwhelmed because it seems impossible to fit everything into my day. Maybe I'll see if I can get a better grip on things if I evaluate things. I'm also only going to focus on tracking food that I eat at home OR pack. Social eating won't be counted, but I'll try to stick to not eating after 9pm MOST days (more likely 8pm, but 9 gives me more flexibility; I know that narrowing my eating window... even if I don't stick to a strict IF protocol DOES help me. Trying to spread my calories or points too far does stress me out) AND I'll work on establishing my rule against second helpings of anything other than fruits or vegetables.
I AM trying here. I really am. I've already loosely planned two meals for tomorrow. Breakfast will be half an avocado with salt, pepper, and lime juice mashed on two slices of 16 grain bread (Silver Hills Bakery) and topped with 2 eggs and arugula (possibly with a pear on the side. Dinner will be 4 oz of skin on salmon with a honey ginger glaze, roasted asparagus, and roasted potatoes (look up "Tasty one pan salmon" on Google). Of course, those two meals will eat up my entire points allowance and then some, but it's better than having a frappucino for dinner, right?0 -
I'm not sure how stretching will help, but I'll try stretching more. I can't get into the meditation aspect of yoga because that aspect of taking a yoga class conflicts with my religious beliefs.
You could pray instead of meditate while doing yoga. For me, praying helps provide stress relief. Perhaps the rosary (sorry if you're not Catholic, but it's still a good prayer that would apply to Protestant denominations also, with maybe just a few tweaks that you like).
Or use the time doing yoga to also thank God for the body he gave you that can do amazing things.0 -
When I was first successful using this site, I was the same way - obsessive. I remember breaking down into tears because I'd gone out with my then-boyfriend for his dinner and realized afterward I'd eaten an over 1000-calorie meal. Looking back, it's so embarrassing, but at the time I could only focus on how I'd ruined my calorie deficit for the week (untrue honestly). Taking a long, two year break from this site allowed me to get my mental health in order, and thankfully for me, the physical health followed soon after. I agree with everyone that has suggested seeking professional help - it can really help take away some of that anxiety and obsessiveness. I wish you all the best in your journey and hope you can find peace with yourself - I know that it can be really, really hard, but it's certainly possible.0
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I AM trying here. I really am. I've already loosely planned two meals for tomorrow. Breakfast will be half an avocado with salt, pepper, and lime juice mashed on two slices of 16 grain bread (Silver Hills Bakery) and topped with 2 eggs and arugula (possibly with a pear on the side. Dinner will be 4 oz of skin on salmon with a honey ginger glaze, roasted asparagus, and roasted potatoes (look up "Tasty one pan salmon" on Google). Of course, those two meals will eat up my entire points allowance and then some, but it's better than having a frappucino for dinner, right?
That sounds yummy! If you need to shave more calories, do, say, roasted spaghetti squash instead of potatoes and skip the glaze on the salmon. Salmon is great with just herbs
I don't know the points system, but it does sound too restrictive. OTOH, potatoes can be hard to fit in calorie-wise if you like to eat a portion like I do (and I can't anymore because of blood sugar, so they are only an occasional treat now for me anyway).
And then some sauces can add many calories when they aren't really necessary for taste. A honey sauce may fit there (honey means no for me for glucose, too), and the fish is indeed a tasty one by itself, so I'd go with maybe some dill and cook the fish really nicely.
Oh, and leave the skin on the plate if need be for an everyday sort of meal if the calories are getting too high. Still sounds extremely yummy!
I'm maintaining, and I still only eat one hushpuppy when I get BBQ, lol. Maybe two They just aren't worth the carbs (for me) and calories to eat several. But I do love them, so I eat a bit (and track them). That sort of thing. Good luck! 0 -
I have been looking at options for help. I've been in counseling in the past. I've been checking out OA meetings and chatting with a counselor from the NEDA website. I have been following advice from people here. But I'm still not sure what good it's going to do. The person on the NEDA website was really no help. She seemed to be confused as to why I was even on there.
I'm trying to figure out something that will work. Tomorrow, I'm going to try going back to tracking points since I don't have any out-of-home dining planned. However, I'm going to take a different approach. I bought a little 49 cent memo pad at the store and I'll write down what I'm eating on there (including weights of certain foods). Then I'll track it on the app AFTER I eat it- that way I can get an idea of how I'm eating if I'm not focused on the numbers. I think that's one of the reasons I experience burn-out. I try to pre-plan my food, and then when I see the numbers, I get overwhelmed because it seems impossible to fit everything into my day. Maybe I'll see if I can get a better grip on things if I evaluate things. I'm also only going to focus on tracking food that I eat at home OR pack. Social eating won't be counted, but I'll try to stick to not eating after 9pm MOST days (more likely 8pm, but 9 gives me more flexibility; I know that narrowing my eating window... even if I don't stick to a strict IF protocol DOES help me. Trying to spread my calories or points too far does stress me out) AND I'll work on establishing my rule against second helpings of anything other than fruits or vegetables.
I AM trying here. I really am. I've already loosely planned two meals for tomorrow. Breakfast will be half an avocado with salt, pepper, and lime juice mashed on two slices of 16 grain bread (Silver Hills Bakery) and topped with 2 eggs and arugula (possibly with a pear on the side. Dinner will be 4 oz of skin on salmon with a honey ginger glaze, roasted asparagus, and roasted potatoes (look up "Tasty one pan salmon" on Google). Of course, those two meals will eat up my entire points allowance and then some, but it's better than having a frappucino for dinner, right?
Again a bunch of overly complicated details to describe a very simple process.
Buy food, cook food, eat food, log food.
The last one can be moved to any other step in that process.
That's all there is to it. JFDI.0 -
I have been looking at options for help. I've been in counseling in the past. I've been checking out OA meetings and chatting with a counselor from the NEDA website. I have been following advice from people here. But I'm still not sure what good it's going to do. The person on the NEDA website was really no help. She seemed to be confused as to why I was even on there.
Here's an idea. When someone gives you advice, how about you go into it with an open mind, instead of immediately wondering if it'll do you any good. Do you know what a self-fulfilling prophecy is?
And the person on the NEDA website was likely confused because you probably went on and on in five paragraphs about something that should take five sentences to relate. Frankly, I would bet that most of us are confused as to why you're here, because every suggestion is met with either a "Yeah, but...." or a flat out "No".0 -
I have been looking at options for help. I've been in counseling in the past. I've been checking out OA meetings and chatting with a counselor from the NEDA website. I have been following advice from people here. But I'm still not sure what good it's going to do. The person on the NEDA website was really no help. She seemed to be confused as to why I was even on there.
Then you either failed to accurately convey what's going on, or they failed to understand. If the only way to approach your food is with absolute control, and anything less causes you to completely fall out of the habit, you need to find a better approach. Most people take a "close enough is good enough" approach to it, where they weigh/measure what they can, honestly and accurately estimate what they can't, and make an effort to stay under their numbers in any case.
If the only way to feel comfortable with your eating habits is complete control, you either need to take ownership for that control by providing your own food or making necessary changes to eat your own food on the needed timeline--You didn't have to stay late; a simple, "I'm sorry, but I can't tonight. I'd love to, with a bit more notice next time though!" would suffice. If you can't do either of those, you need to become more comfortable relinquishing control. If you're unable to do some combination of those three, you should probably seek some sort of professional help.
You indicate membership in a bible study group. A good starting point would be to speak to your pastor if you need a pointer towards social services. Typically, they'll have contacts, inside and outside of the church, to people who can help on any MH fronts.0 -
thorsmom01 wrote: »Christine_72 wrote: »so now people can't do yoga because they're Christian? ?
I just cant..... even deal with this thread anymore. It is literally making me anxious! !
I've never heard of Christians or Catholics ( both would have bible study like the op mentioned ) not being allowed to practice yoga. This thread is the first time anyone has ever mentioned this in my 38 yrs of being a Catholic. So I'm guessing it is just an excuse. Shocking .
Pretty sure OP isn't Catholic.
Conservative Christianity (Pentecostal, Evangelical, Charismatic) isn't keen on yoga.
https://www.probe.org/yoga-and-christianity-are-they-compatible/
(above link contains a long article, but it comprehensively explains the Christian reservations about yoga)
This is literally the stupidest thing I've ever read. Why do people insist on demonizing such harmless things?0 -
jflanaganasl wrote: »thorsmom01 wrote: »Christine_72 wrote: »so now people can't do yoga because they're Christian? ?
I just cant..... even deal with this thread anymore. It is literally making me anxious! !
I've never heard of Christians or Catholics ( both would have bible study like the op mentioned ) not being allowed to practice yoga. This thread is the first time anyone has ever mentioned this in my 38 yrs of being a Catholic. So I'm guessing it is just an excuse. Shocking .
Pretty sure OP isn't Catholic.
Conservative Christianity (Pentecostal, Evangelical, Charismatic) isn't keen on yoga.
https://www.probe.org/yoga-and-christianity-are-they-compatible/
(above link contains a long article, but it comprehensively explains the Christian reservations about yoga)
This is literally the stupidest thing I've ever read. Why do people insist on demonizing such harmless things?
Sometimes people fear that which they do not understand.0 -
kshama2001 wrote: »jflanaganasl wrote: »thorsmom01 wrote: »Christine_72 wrote: »so now people can't do yoga because they're Christian? ?
I just cant..... even deal with this thread anymore. It is literally making me anxious! !
I've never heard of Christians or Catholics ( both would have bible study like the op mentioned ) not being allowed to practice yoga. This thread is the first time anyone has ever mentioned this in my 38 yrs of being a Catholic. So I'm guessing it is just an excuse. Shocking .
Pretty sure OP isn't Catholic.
Conservative Christianity (Pentecostal, Evangelical, Charismatic) isn't keen on yoga.
https://www.probe.org/yoga-and-christianity-are-they-compatible/
(above link contains a long article, but it comprehensively explains the Christian reservations about yoga)
This is literally the stupidest thing I've ever read. Why do people insist on demonizing such harmless things?
Sometimes people fear that which they do not understand.
I know. It just frustrates me to no end. Are people actually thinking "Oh I can't do yoga - what if, somewhere between the exercises and the breathing, I accidentally become Hindu?!" Yoga is such a calming and healthful thing that almost anyone can benefit from - but god forbid we experience something that comes from a culture that is not our own. (eye roll)0 -
thorsmom01 wrote: »Christine_72 wrote: »so now people can't do yoga because they're Christian? ?
I just cant..... even deal with this thread anymore. It is literally making me anxious! !
I've never heard of Christians or Catholics ( both would have bible study like the op mentioned ) not being allowed to practice yoga. This thread is the first time anyone has ever mentioned this in my 38 yrs of being a Catholic. So I'm guessing it is just an excuse. Shocking .
It's a real thing in some evangelical communities.0 -
I don't think cooking up Aldi skillet meals from the freezer and/or microwaving frozen vegetables constitutes"an elaborate meal for a dinner party." Often, my dinners at friends' houses range from me being over and asked if I want to stay for dinner to "Hey, I'm going to be late getting home from work and my husband needs to go to his thing. Can you come a little early and watch the kids?" I'm rarely invited over FOR dinner. I'm invited over AT dinner. Sometimes, I'll even cook the dinner (or we'll split cooking duties- they'll cook up some kind of meat, and I'll prepare some roasted vegetables or a salad as a side-dish).
sorry - are these people your friends? Or are they just using you as hired help, and rather than pay you, they feed you, or get you to do the cooking.
Firstly, if you are a babysitter, lay some ground rules, get paid, leave at the scheduled time.
Secondly, whether or not you are in charge of the cooking, you and only you are in charge of the eating. You decide the portion size (and eating an entire bag of steamed vegetables is a pretty big portion, even if it IS low calorie).
If your 'friends' are truly your friends then if they are aware that you are trying to lose weight they should help you by not enabling your eating.0 -
So, if they're really my friends they should let me isolate myself so I'll be skinny?
I went to the NEDA site. I told them that whenever I try to lose weight I become obsessive and then burn out. They basically told me that it doesn't seem like I have anorexia or bulimia and dismissed me.0 -
Did you tell them the part where you open accounts on multiple weight loss websites asking the same questions ad nauseum and shooting down the advise you get ? Did you tell them of your Facebook, Twitter, and blogs where you constantly post of food obsessively?
Tell them that and see what they say.-1 -
I think if spending time discussing diet online is a disorder, most of us have it.0
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WalkingAlong wrote: »I think if spending time discussing diet online is a disorder, most of us have it.
Did someone say that it was?0 -
WalkingAlong wrote: »I think if spending time discussing diet online is a disorder, most of us have it.
For most people it isn't. I think what people (and myself) are referring to is the amount of time and effort spent asking for help only to make elaborate posts full of excuses. This isn't just going on here on MFP but multiple sites/social media platforms and has been going on like this for years. I believe that it has more to do with getting attention than it does actually asking for help.0
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