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Should your S.O./Spouse have a say so if they feel you are too thin or too large?
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Replies
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SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
Have You ever read the posts from others about being scared to go to the gym or run on the road. Find a few then let's discuss. Mind you quite a few unsavoury comments have been made 're large people in this thread.1 -
SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
Well how amusing you are rying to tap into mine without reading my post properly.1 -
SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
No, it is not silly. I'm not tapping into someone else's thought process (I don't have to)- it is clearly evident in this thread how 'fat' people are viewed by some. She was being mean and snarky and I responded the same way. That's how that worked.
Stop the fat shaming and maybe 'more' obese people confidence would rise.2 -
heiliskrimsli wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »Therealobi1 wrote: »Therealobi1 wrote: »Therealobi1 wrote: »I love it when it all gets down to athlete pics to "prove" that BMI does not work for us common people. The sad truth is that for most of us, at a BMI of 25 or even 24 or for many 23, we are not looking that good any more. The fact that there are lots of people in whatever country one might be who are very overweight, it really does not change anything.
So 22 is the magic number.
It depends on how you are built and how athletic you are. For me, who have a small frame, ideally this would be around 19. for someone else it might be 22, but I have yet to meet a single person who really looked good at the upper part of normal BMI and was not spending a lot of time at sports (a lot meaning not just an hour every day or every other day as most of us "amateur athletes" do).
i wont speak about other people's best bmi, but for me at my height and build those bmi's quoted would make me look sick. that doesnt mean giving up it means working on recomping.
And this why different things work for different people. The BMI of 25 mentioned from this previous poster might be crazy low for some, it might be very high for others. Someone might call sickly thin what someone else calls very chubby. To give an example, goal BMIs and goal weights I often see from some posters are far ABOVE the highest BMI/weight I have ever found myself, as I would start trying to correct things much earlier. Obviously others do not feel this way, or this wouldn't be their goal. Different people have different preferences and possibly different cultures or even different friends influence each of us in a different way.
i agree with the different people different preferences, but to deny a whole group of people and make like they are faulty goods who will be left on the shelf (this isnt aimed at your post).
See now i understand why people post about being scared to jog, being scared to go to the gym etc, because there are posters like we have seen that think unpleasant things about them.
Perhaps work on your confidence instead of worrying about what others are thinking?
There are people who I judge at the gym.- People who don't wipe the machines.
- People who don't re-rack their weights.
- People who do curls in the squat rack.
- People who camp on a machine to not use it for anything other than selfies.
- People who bring little kids and let them run amok in the work out areas.
- People who are eating on the machines.
I had to add the last one after literally seeing someone drop french fries on a treadmill. Seriously.
Most everyone else at the gym gets a very passing acknowledgement that they even exist, although I will sometimes take a look at someone who catches my eye, but then it's right back to focusing on the one thing that really matters to me at the gym. Me.
Oops, I do curls in the squat rack.....it has the bar I need
But the other things I agree with - I don't judge, but I get pissed. Don't take massive breaks on the machines - do your sets and keep it moving.
I've noticed that I have pissed a few people off by putting my phone and water on a bench or something while I'm working on the one next to it. I got to do better with that though - because that's not cool.
Now, I've never seen anyone eating on the treadmills though
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Therealobi1 wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
Well how amusing you are rying to tap into mine without reading my post properly.
"i agree with the different people different preferences, but to deny a whole group of people and make like they are faulty goods who will be left on the shelf (this isnt aimed at your post).
See now i understand why people post about being scared to jog, being scared to go to the gym etc, because there are posters like we have seen that think unpleasant things about them."
you're going to lead your entire life based on what others might/might not be thinking? Fine, do that.
Just don't shift the weight of responsibility on others since you can't control what others are thinking and have no right to it either.
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STLBADGIRL wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
No, it is not silly. I'm not tapping into someone else's thought process (I don't have to)- it is clearly evident in this thread how 'fat' people are viewed by some. She was being mean and snarky and I responded the same way. That's how that worked.
Stop the fat shaming and maybe 'more' obese people confidence would rise.
Well said.1 -
SpotLighttt wrote: »Therealobi1 wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
Well how amusing you are rying to tap into mine without reading my post properly.
"i agree with the different people different preferences, but to deny a whole group of people and make like they are faulty goods who will be left on the shelf (this isnt aimed at your post).
See now i understand why people post about being scared to jog, being scared to go to the gym etc, because there are posters like we have seen that think unpleasant things about them."
you're going to lead your entire life based on what others might/might not be thinking? Fine, do that.
Just don't shift the weight of responsibility on others since you can't control what others are thinking and have no right to it either.
I don't even know what you are typing back to me0 -
STLBADGIRL wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
No, it is not silly. I'm not tapping into someone else's thought process (I don't have to)- it is clearly evident in this thread how 'fat' people are viewed by some. She was being mean and snarky and I responded the same way. That's how that worked.
Stop the fat shaming and maybe 'more' obese people confidence would rise.
whos fat shaming?
Im into the whole society helps each other mantra, but in order to help individuals, the individual must help themselves first.
Not going to the gym because you are scared others might *think* you don't belong is not anyone elses problem but something you should deal with. It's evident your weight is an issue for yourself if it's holding you back so much. when I said you, I dont mean "you"3 -
STLBADGIRL wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
No, it is not silly. I'm not tapping into someone else's thought process (I don't have to)- it is clearly evident in this thread how 'fat' people are viewed by some. She was being mean and snarky and I responded the same way. That's how that worked.
Stop the fat shaming and maybe 'more' obese people confidence would rise.
meh.
There's a difference between fat shaming and having a preference. Everyone has preferences. There's nothing wrong with my preferences, there's nothing wrong with your preferences. If my preference is for thin/fit/strong/whatever, and that preference impacts how I live... that's not fat shaming.
Is fat shaming a thing? Yes, for sure. But I haven't seen that here, at least not in the last handful of pages.6 -
Definitely been some unsavoury comments been said re larger people. You will have to read back2
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STLBADGIRL wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
No, it is not silly. I'm not tapping into someone else's thought process (I don't have to)- it is clearly evident in this thread how 'fat' people are viewed by some. She was being mean and snarky and I responded the same way. That's how that worked.
Stop the fat shaming and maybe 'more' obese people confidence would rise.
meh.
There's a difference between fat shaming and having a preference. Everyone has preferences. There's nothing wrong with my preferences, there's nothing wrong with your preferences. If my preference is for thin/fit/strong/whatever, and that preference impacts how I live... that's not fat shaming.
Is fat shaming a thing? Yes, for sure. But I haven't seen that here, at least not in the last handful of pages.
For the record... I don't think you fat shamed...
And it's possible you skipped a few pages....LOL1 -
Therealobi1 wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »Therealobi1 wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
Well how amusing you are rying to tap into mine without reading my post properly.
"i agree with the different people different preferences, but to deny a whole group of people and make like they are faulty goods who will be left on the shelf (this isnt aimed at your post).
See now i understand why people post about being scared to jog, being scared to go to the gym etc, because there are posters like we have seen that think unpleasant things about them."
you're going to lead your entire life based on what others might/might not be thinking? Fine, do that.
Just don't shift the weight of responsibility on others since you can't control what others are thinking and have no right to it either.
I don't even know what you are typing back to me
wow. it's a direct response to your comment.
Didn't think it was so difficult to track back.
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RemoteOutpost wrote: »You be what I want you to be or I won't love you anymore.
Don't know whether to laugh or cry.0 -
It can't beSpotLighttt wrote: »Therealobi1 wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »Therealobi1 wrote: »SpotLighttt wrote: »STLBADGIRL wrote: »
Perhaps stop judging people and just do what suits you!
This is silly.
How do you tap into someones thought process though? If you go around assuming people are thinking or in words judging you then isnt that your problem and not someone elses?
If you are scared to go to the gym because you *think* others find you fat then surely that is your problem?
To respond by suggesting others shouldn't judge - how do you know you are being judged?
bizarre
Well how amusing you are rying to tap into mine without reading my post properly.
"i agree with the different people different preferences, but to deny a whole group of people and make like they are faulty goods who will be left on the shelf (this isnt aimed at your post).
See now i understand why people post about being scared to jog, being scared to go to the gym etc, because there are posters like we have seen that think unpleasant things about them."
you're going to lead your entire life based on what others might/might not be thinking? Fine, do that.
Just don't shift the weight of responsibility on others since you can't control what others are thinking and have no right to it either.
I don't even know what you are typing back to me
wow. it's a direct response to your comment.
Didn't think it was so difficult to track back.0 -
Therealobi1 wrote: »Definitely been some unsavoury comments been said re larger people. You will have to read back
yes some have suggested they dont find larger people attractive
others have said larger people smell moreso than slim people
whats unsavory? Preferences and experiences?2 -
Therealobi1 wrote: »Definitely been some unsavoury comments been said re larger people. You will have to read back
I'm interested... but with 27 pages in this thread, can you help me narrow the search? Are we talking half way back? early on? 2 days ago?
Not trying to put you on the spot/make you call out names...1 -
SpotLighttt wrote: »Therealobi1 wrote: »Definitely been some unsavoury comments been said re larger people. You will have to read back
yes some have suggested they dont find larger people attractive
others have said larger people smell moreso than slim people
whats unsavory? Preferences and experiences?
Ok then.0 -
Therealobi1 wrote: »Definitely been some unsavoury comments been said re larger people. You will have to read back
I'm interested... but with 27 pages in this thread, can you help me narrow the search? Are we talking half way back? early on? 2 days ago?
Not trying to put you on the spot/make you call out names...
Spotlight has named some just now but and if you go back a few pages there was a quick summary0 -
STLBADGIRL wrote: »RemoteOutpost wrote: »You be what I want you to be or I won't love you anymore.
Don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Laugh2 -
Therealobi1 wrote: »Definitely been some unsavoury comments been said re larger people. You will have to read back
I'm interested... but with 27 pages in this thread, can you help me narrow the search? Are we talking half way back? early on? 2 days ago?
Not trying to put you on the spot/make you call out names...
lol, good luck0
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