Absurd Headlines

caco_ethes

Is this self-explanatory? I feel like this is self-explanatory. But in case it isn’t, make up ridiculous headlines here.

Ex. Gorilla Caught Embezzling Will Spend Rest of His Life Behind Bars

eccomi_qui

Man remains virgin until he dies, regrets nothing

caco_ethes

Aliens Blow Up Moon; Leaders Worldwide Meet to Discuss Why Aliens are Such Jerks

CaptainFantastic00

Did we just want to throw 'the onion'screenshots on here or legitimate ones?

Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore

TeacupsAndToning wrote: »

Woman walks down the street without encountering any pervy men

I love fairy tales!!

eccomi_qui

Two Canadians caught fighting over who gets to go through the door first, both apologize

eccomi_qui

This; is not a headline; but you know; what it is.

caco_ethes

CaptainFantastic00 wrote: »

Did we just want to throw 'the onion'screenshots on here or legitimate ones?

Man Confused by Simple Instructions Makes Things Unnecessarily Complicated

CaptainFantastic00

Man in fadora expects nookie after treating a woman with respect

caco_ethes

CaptainFantastic00 wrote: »

Man in fadora expects nookie after treating a woman with respect

eccomi_qui

Man with beard thicker on his neck than his cheeks expects relations after braving friend zone for 16 years

CaptainFantastic00

Man gets put in the friendzone states 'I never really had friends before, this is neat'

CaptainFantastic00

"Starving Artist" admits he actually eats at the shelter every day for free

eccomi_qui

Doctors hate him! Women love him! Find out how to enlarge your penis with this crazy trick

Find_Me_Again

Want to meet hot elderly women? Click here! 3 miles away!

caco_ethes

Man Claims to be Best at Something; Fact Checking Ensues

CaptainFantastic00

New book leaves fans scratching their heads and wondering "didn't that author die?"

gardengnomemanifesto

Woman covered in lard slips on banana peel at Walmart

eccomi_qui

Man dies of paranoia; thought every vague was about him - more @ 5 on WHGZ