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  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
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    Guy uses toothpick; has not imagination because lack of sleep
  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
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    Man and woman post bathtub selfie, internet vaporized
  • Beka3695
    Beka3695 Posts: 4,126 Member
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    Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore wrote: »
    Scientists Discover You Can Tell The Difference Between A Crocodile And An Alligator By Paying Attention To Whether You See Them Later Or After Awhile

    I found this WAY funnier that I should have!!
  • Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore
    Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore Posts: 492 Member
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    becky3695 wrote: »
    Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore wrote: »
    Scientists Discover You Can Tell The Difference Between A Crocodile And An Alligator By Paying Attention To Whether You See Them Later Or After Awhile

    I found this WAY funnier that I should have!!

    I'm a beast at Dad Jokes.
  • eccomi_qui
    eccomi_qui Posts: 1,831 Member
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    Man obsessed with sausages turns to broccoli to try and spice up his sex life
  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
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    Woman disconnects from social media, hopes her Facebook post about it goes viral
  • Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore
    Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore Posts: 492 Member
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    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    Man obsessed with sausages turns to broccoli to try and spice up his sex life

    Virgin Turns To Spice Puns: Realizes Words Are The Trick To Gettin' Some
  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
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    Sausage man finds broccoli to be more like mockery; something something something hockey
  • eccomi_qui
    eccomi_qui Posts: 1,831 Member
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    cee134 wrote: »
    Sausage man finds broccoli to be more like mockery; something something something hockey

    Why do you hate me?
  • gardengnomemanifesto
    gardengnomemanifesto Posts: 427 Member
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    Woman discovers the amount of whining at home is actually equal to the amount of whining on mfp....decides to live with geese and poop on lawns
  • Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore
    Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore Posts: 492 Member
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    TeacupsAndToning wrote: »
    Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore wrote: »
    gardengnomemanifesto wrote: »
    Woman claims to be sleeping, posts selfie

    A couple on my facebook does this- post a cute little snap of them asleep with a caption "Aww we love sleeping together"
    Who took the pic then??

    You should look up the "can I go now guys?" meme.

    Just did...it fits.
    I used the one of Amy Poehler with the video camera playing the "cool mom" in Mean Girls though.
  • eccomi_qui
    eccomi_qui Posts: 1,831 Member
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    Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore wrote: »
    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    Man obsessed with sausages turns to broccoli to try and spice up his sex life

    Virgin Turns To Spice Puns: Realizes Words Are The Trick To Gettin' Some

    It’s Thyme for You to let me Nutmeg.
  • CaptainFantastic00
    CaptainFantastic00 Posts: 4,619 Member
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    Vegan implodes after not telling someone about being vegan for 12 hours
  • Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore
    Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore Posts: 492 Member
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    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    Whybelesswhenyoucanbmore wrote: »
    eccomi_qui wrote: »
    Man obsessed with sausages turns to broccoli to try and spice up his sex life

    Virgin Turns To Spice Puns: Realizes Words Are The Trick To Gettin' Some

    It’s Thyme for You to let me Nutmeg.

    *swoon*
    Do you happen to know a Meg in real life? You should try this out and let us know how it goes.
  • 81Katz
    81Katz Posts: 7,074 Member
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    Woman declares "if you don't know why I'm mad, I'm not going to tell you!" Man settles in for a long night of hearing why woman is mad.
  • gardengnomemanifesto
    gardengnomemanifesto Posts: 427 Member
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    Man with eleven toes discovers he can’t actually count
  • eccomi_qui
    eccomi_qui Posts: 1,831 Member
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    Vague poetry thread shut down because poets got “deep”, profound
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