The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living
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@JenT304 I hate those dreams! So disturbing but then a relief,yes the plain fact is alcohol IS a poison and if I had that "turn off" switch I wouldn't even be here,I've been having romantic thoughts about drinking these past few days and really need to nip that! It's not even the taste I like,it's the drunk I like but omg if I gotta deal with puking,waking up all night,dry eyes,irritable bowel,etc forget it! That's my reality and I need to remember that, I hate commercials and shows that show drinkin as such a great time, I guess it was for me at one time but those days are looooong gone,waves to all and wishes for a great AF Friday
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@JenT304 I've said it before & I'll say it again ~Thank you for starting this thread~ I am thankful for stumbling on the less alcohol thread in my earlier days of being AF...it was a great resource, BUT I too felt the tension expressing the truth on that thread about alcohol being poison. The interesting thing to me is that some of the resources on the first page of that thread is Craig Beck, Alcohol Mastery, Annie Grace who ALL say alcohol IS poison..that is where I initially learned the truth about alcohol. Yet, I felt like I was walking on eggshells if I dared to mention the truth that I learned through the resources listed there. Hmmmm?
I have never felt ostracized on this thread for expressing my view and am so thankful to those here who are real and not deluding themselves into thinking alcohol has some kind of benefit. It doesn't mean the struggle is any easier when we deal in reality, because the hook is still there and that is one of the most insidious things about it...although we KNOW it is NOT good for us, we can still fall prey to it's lure & have to fight to stay free!
Denial is the chief tool to use if we want to continue to do what we do, especially if it is not good for us...denial keeps us stuck in behaviours that are harmful...period!! We cannot be honest AND be in denial...it's one or the other. Honesty is the only antidote to break through our denial to gain the courage we need to continue the fight. It absolutely takes courage to face the truth...like Dr. P. says, "you can't change what you don't acknowledge! "So to all my courageous friends on this thread...thank you to you too 7 -
Did you know that St Patricks day is one of the most busiest days for bars .....and DUI's
I didnt know that until I happened to listen to the news with the stats on DUI's and increase of numbers of people arrested for public drinking and driving drunk.........something to think about.
I have a friend who stopped drinking about 7 months ago...totally stopped......His sugar levels have decreased dramatically, from the high 7s, down to I think, 6.5.......he is diabetic and he's elated that his numbers are down
Whatpauly ,you are right . Alcohol kills.........I still keep up with my friend Beverly's 2 children. Both in their 20s. Both really great kids who are so missing their mom. She drank...........heavily, so heavily that her husband couldn't handle it, and left her..........She then moved into a small apartment, wasn't working but drank straight vodka for years..........She hit her head one night , alone , must have been so drunk, she couldn't walk or stay balanced and fell on the shower door.........The police think that after she did hit her head , she sat down in bed, or passed out........and died of a blood clot that killed her from a blow to the head....... We dated in high school, she was tall, about 5" 11 120 lbs, incredible figure, she had looks, she had it all..........when I saw her before she passed away ,I literally was shocked. I hadnt seen her in over 30 year.........she had aged terribly, she looked 80 and she just gave in, her brain performance was bad.........she got very paranoid, couldn't accept her husband leaving her and getting custody of the kids.....and when they did an autopsy, her liver was as hard as a rock and green.......really scary...............
I agree, if people continue to drink, it not only kills them, but totally, totally devastated their loved ones after they are gone.. Best wishes to everyone and be safe this weekend....
Best wishes, Lloyd11 -
MountainLaurel787 wrote: »@kevinrfletcher
I like your chat with the bottle! I'm 8 weeks AF today, but I still have a 1.75L of Skyy vodka in the spare bedroom closet. I think my bottle is a girl though. She's the "secret" bottle I used to top off the regular bottle that my husband could see. I don't miss all the work that involved. I think it's time I had a chat with it ("*kitten*...please..."), say goodbye and kick it out of the house!
Congrats on the 8 weeks! To quote Calvin & Hobbes, "WOOOOT! WOOOOT!!!"
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@JenT304 Same here. It's how I always got back to the heavy stuff... I figure I will control it this time, start out with a beer or two, sitting on the beach, no harm there... two months later, it's a fifth of bourbon every other day. I'm tires of it all. Killing myself with booze. For all those that can control it, good on ya! I've seen a few friends that thought they could though, and it took them down. Powerful stuff. I quit smoking easier than I quit booze...
Day 4 in the books. I let "Jim" survive another day. I'll most likely kill him in the morning...10 -
Did you know that St Patricks day is one of the most busiest days for bars .....and DUI's
I didnt know that until I happened to listen to the news with the stats on DUI's and increase of numbers of people arrested for public drinking and driving drunk.........something to think about.
I have a friend who stopped drinking about 7 months ago...totally stopped......His sugar levels have decreased dramatically, from the high 7s, down to I think, 6.5.......he is diabetic and he's elated that his numbers are down
Whatpauly ,you are right . Alcohol kills.........I still keep up with my friend Beverly's 2 children. Both in their 20s. Both really great kids who are so missing their mom. She drank...........heavily, so heavily that her husband couldn't handle it, and left her..........She then moved into a small apartment, wasn't working but drank straight vodka for years..........She hit her head one night , alone , must have been so drunk, she couldn't walk or stay balanced and fell on the shower door.........The police think that after she did hit her head , she sat down in bed, or passed out........and died of a blood clot that killed her from a blow to the head....... We dated in high school, she was tall, about 5" 11 120 lbs, incredible figure, she had looks, she had it all..........when I saw her before she passed away ,I literally was shocked. I hadnt seen her in over 30 year.........she had aged terribly, she looked 80 and she just gave in, her brain performance was bad.........she got very paranoid, couldn't accept her husband leaving her and getting custody of the kids.....and when they did an autopsy, her liver was as hard as a rock and green.......really scary...............
I agree, if people continue to drink, it not only kills them, but totally, totally devastated their loved ones after they are gone.. Best wishes to everyone and be safe this weekend....
Best wishes, Lloyd
Very heartbreaking to read that😢 sorry for the loss of your friend, my coworker's dad had a liver transplant a few years ago and his wife sent a pic of the old liver and yup it was a greenish color,hard looking and full of holes/pits looked so gross!2 -
My God @lloydrt . What a message. But that is the ugly truth. Alcohol kills. I just read this:
"According to a recent analysis from the Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation at the University of Washington, the number of alcohol-related deaths in the United States rose by 35% between 2007 and 2017. In comparison, the overall death rate in the United States rose by 24% over that time.
That rise in alcohol-related deaths was especially stark among women, at 67%, compared with a 29% increase among men. And while alcohol-related deaths among teenagers were decreased by about 16% from 2007 to 2017, alcohol-related deaths among people ages 45 to 64 rose by about 25%, O'Donnell writes."
Well I'd say a lot of us on this thread are in that age range.
I'm trying to think of my body as a car. This car has taken some abuse and it won't run forever but I'd like to keep it on the road as long as possible. So only put good fuel in it.8 -
kevinrfletcher wrote: »it's a fifth of bourbon every other day.
I got tired of making so many trips to the liquor store so I bought the huge bottles of Jim Beam. The scary thing (now) is everyone at the liquor store knew me. I can't tell you how many times I would work out at the gym, head to the liquor store, head home and get hammered.
Hang in there @kevinrfletcher !!!
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This app takes the wind out of my sails.. Just wrote a long heartfelt post and lost it when my phone reoriented to landscape.. Makes me not want to try to post this again because it pi**ed me off so much, but I felt it was too important not to.
I've decided to try to post here on Friday and Saturday nights. I've noticed, since joining the group, that we all seem to go AWOL on those evenings, at a time when many of us may need the most support. At times when I've struggled on weekend nights, I would look to this page for some inspiration to not cave to cravings, but there were usually no new posts. While any decision to allow myself to cave has been 100 percent on me, I thought that maybe starting to post those evenings may help people to feel supported and stay accountable.
I have found myself reluctant to re-engage after a slip up out of disappointment and embarrassment with myself. While I still continue to check in daily to read what others write, I'm less likely to share my own struggles.
But for those who are struggling, here goes: I made the decision to go AF on January 8th. I had one slip up in January, thus, 8 total days not AF, but.. 23 days AF. February, I had 5 screw up days, but 23 days AF. March, my biggest mess yet, 5 days not AF this month, despite making a commitment to the 90 day challenge. On March first, the night after my first overnight with my husband and without my kid in 11 months, my husband wanted to stop at a brewery on the way home. I think I allowed myself to indulge because on some level I wanted something to go back to how it was before baby. I then didn't fight urges hard enough when they came up the next weekend either.
Well, I am really committed again. Started my crazy diet again yesterday because I'm disgusted with myself and that diet leaves no room for anything bad, let alone alcohol. It's healthy, but strict as all get out and I need that quick loss to fuel me on at this point and keep me motivated.
So as pathetic as I feel that I said yes to a challenge and fell right off the wagon, I'm sharing this for anyone who feels the same. And thanks to this group, I have made a major change. I used to drink nightly. Not to excess (other than the fact that it was nightly) And I now no longer drink during the week and that's the new normal. So although it's not my ideal 100 percent AF, I've come a long way. Now to tackle the weekends. And that starts with posting Friday and Saturday nights both for myself and all of you..10 -
Yellowstone1983 wrote: »So as pathetic as I feel that I said yes to a challenge and fell right off the wagon, I'm sharing this for anyone who feels the same. And thanks to this group, I have made a major change. I used to drink nightly. Not to excess (other than the fact that it was nightly) And I now no longer drink during the week and that's the new normal. So although it's not my ideal 100 percent AF, I've come a long way. Now to tackle the weekends. And that starts with posting Friday and Saturday nights both for myself and all of you..
That right there is a victory! Sometimes it's the little steps that lead to big changes. None of us are perfect, and we give in to temptation at times, but we know what the end goal is and we'll get there eventually. Keep up the great work and thanks for sharing!
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We have slip ups and that is why it’s so important we are able to share how we feel. I have also felt embarrassed over my mishaps; however, if I didn’t want to be better I would not continue to learn from those mistakes. I feel so much better AF and do have occasional wine, yet, I know one is typically never enough for me.
@yellowstone1983 I will totally support you and post here Friday and Saturday’s. 👍💃❤️
Proud of everyone’s achievements!8 -
I also toppled off the wagon immediately. I was on vacation and decided to have wine with dinner. The good news is that it was just that -- a little wine with dinner. I didn't enjoy it as much as I expected, but I didn't go crazy drinking either. I have decided that I like my life better without drinking and that is how I am going to live but if I do have a glass of wine on vacation I am not going to beat myself up. It is the habit of drinking that I do not like. I do not like wondering if I have wine at home -- or if there is enough. I don't like the feeling of dependence and I don't like getting drunk.9
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@lloydrt Sorry to hear about your friend
@Yellowstone1983 Yes, it may seem like the thread takes the weekend off, but I'm sure there are lots who check in but may not comment. I'm one of those, so please reach out if you need to even if it seems like no one is here. As for you falling off the wagon, it sounds like you've made a lot of progress overall. So, dust yourself off & hop back on and let it go....it's learning from the mistake that encourages growth.
@lagoscarrie It is truly liberating not to be chained to alcohol....I spent so much time thinking about it...as you said making sure there was enough...I spent far to much time thinking about drinking & thinking about wishing I could stop drinking...what a waste of time & energy!! There's still 2.5 months left of the challenge...it's not over till it's over
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@lorrainequiche59 Thank you for your encouraging words! I am very happy not drinking and will gladly join you in the rest of the challenge!5
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I've had a persistent headache for days and keep thinking that in the past I'd have a drink to take the edge off. But I've reminded myself I'd feel worse the next morning and so avoided giving in to these thoughts. On top of this, I had some extra stress tonight and struggled for a good while, thinking a glass of wine sure would ease my anxiety. I've talked myself out of it, but it is difficult sometimes. I know we all struggle, I think it's great that we have a place to share our experiences.10
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@lagoscarrie You said something that struck home: "I do not like wondering if I have wine at home -- or if there is enough."
Been there, done that, on so many occasions. I am lucky enough to be able to walk and do pretty much everything I want: groceries, bank, errands, etc. And because I walk, there is a second part to your question: "What do I really need, and what can wait, so I can carry the wine home? Do I really need this Tide as much as I want this beer?"7 -
@VeggieGirlforLife Hang in there! I used to have Sundays where I would start the morning with coffee and the newspaper and then segue into a bottle of red for the afternoon. I have been in the mood for that Red for almost a week now, for many of your same reasons. Sometimes I swear I get anxious about feeling anxious.9
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It's weird when the drinking urges hit.
I had a particularly grueling, 13 hour, work day yesterday on the banks of the Missouri River drilling borings to explore for a new bridge. The Nebraska flood waters were on the way and we had to get done yesterday as our job site would go underwater today sometime. Near the end of the day, I started in my old pattern of "Man - a bourbon will go down nice tonight."
My mistake was trying to keep up with the young guys - which I did - but I was exhausted and went to bed at 9 PM and was still AF. I am sore as hell this morning - but still on track
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I get irritated when I lose a long post too Yellowstone! I also sometimes get irritated when NOBODY has posted when I come on feeling sorta vulnerable, I understand people get busy but I just can't help but feel that way and yes I'm guilty of it too,sometimes I read but don't post,I need to change that,remember I always say ANY day without alcohol is a win! Even if someone who joined the 3 month challenge has 'slipped' at the end of 3 months there will still be progress so instead of 90 drinking days a person may have 5,10,or even 30 drinkin days,hell its still better than 90!! Big hugs to all and Happy St.Patrick's day,took my g-son to breakfast at Denny's,this kid ordered spagetti,
ah kids 7
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