The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living

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  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    mbaker566 wrote: »
    sister bea is awesome
    i like father tom because he is on both sides of the table.

    and scott r, chris r, bob d.
    my husband and i like earl h.
    john laroquette and anthony hopkins have a share on youtube too

    if you want to know how crazy the loved ones can get i like Mary Pearl and Larcene. Kathy H i think too

    Thanks for noting these speakers; I will check them out. Very inspiring to me to listen to people who know exactly how I am feeling.
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    EFT17220531 wrote: »
    Hi, my name is Niko... i am an alcoholic with no life... i have 4 kids and no wife as she left a couple of years ago with an italian millionairre. i take my anger out on the kids and I need help. please help me.

    @EFT17220531 I'm tagging you because you've had lots of helpful suggestions after you posted, and this way you'll get a notification to come back to this thread.

    I'll add that we have a great collection of tips how to do this here:

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10703931/less-alcohol-november-2018-one-day-at-a-time

    Best wishes, and much respect for speaking up about your problem.

    I've found that discussion with others has been incredibly valuable and made me so much happier.
  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    RubyRed427 wrote: »
    I am hoping I can abstain. I know I probably shouldn't be going but I can't stay in my house forever.

    So I wrote in my phone all the reasons not to drink and why to stay sober. And told myself to read this list that evening several times. I also can leave early or call my sober friend to talk. I want to go and see if I can do all the fun things I used to do but sober and aware.

    YOU CAN DO THIS!! It will be interesting to hear your experience from a sober point of view. This may be a bit of an eye-opener for you especially since there are so many memories of a drinking you at this particular venue. I think you are strong enough to test the waters on this cause you have an action plan & you've been sober long enough to put it into action. I'll be thinking about you & cheering you on.

    P.S. = Why not set a timer on your phone to go off at increments with a reminder of your goal...or have your sober friend call you a half hour in just to check on you...I'm not sure how vulnerable you are feeling doing this, but you sound somewhat concerned.

  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    ElC_76 wrote: »
    ElC_76 wrote: »
    Just reaching out,.. I feel I'll stay strong if I shared this. It's my brothers birthday today and I am trying not to give in to a drink.
    I trust I can yell u tomorrow I won victory...

    Hey, its 4.52am and i have finished my workout! That i wouldnt have been able to do if i gave in **flex** its 4 weeks AF on sunday :);)

    You CAN do this!!
  • ElC_76
    ElC_76 Posts: 3,054 Member
    lorrainequiche59 wrote: »
    RubyRed427 wrote: »
    I am hoping I can abstain. I know I probably shouldn't be going but I can't stay in my house forever.

    So I wrote in my phone all the reasons not to drink and why to stay sober. And told myself to read this list that evening several times. I also can leave early or call my sober friend to talk. I want to go and see if I can do all the fun things I used to do but sober and aware.

    YOU CAN DO THIS!! It will be interesting to hear your experience from a sober point of view. This may be a bit of an eye-opener for you especially since there are so many memories of a drinking you at this particular venue. I think you are strong enough to test the waters on this cause you have an action plan & you've been sober long enough to put it into action. I'll be thinking about you & cheering you on.

    P.S. = Why not set a timer on your phone to go off at increments with a reminder of your goal...or have your sober friend call you a half hour in just to check on you...I'm not sure how vulnerable you are feeling doing this, but you sound somewhat concerned.

    That's such an awesome idea. Thanks!!.. we'll all benefit from this.. :))
  • ElC_76
    ElC_76 Posts: 3,054 Member
    edited November 2018
    CarvedTones wrote: »
    joha5603 wrote: »
    Okay... I could use an extra boost of encouragement. My mom is visiting. She's a pretty difficult person (BPD)... normally I would drink a bit and I'd loosen up. I've had only one prior visit with her since I started on this AF journey. That one was fine. This one does not as there are already "issues." I guess a few walks around the neighborhood are in my future. So, yes, I could just use a few extra words of encouragement.

    Sometimes it helps me to think about needing any crutch instead of thinking about drinking in particular. I concentrate on handling what it is I need to face instead of worrying over what I need to avoid. Sometimes I need to be diligent about what I am not going to do and other times being confident about what I am going to do helps me more.

    Thanku, just what i need to read..

    I have used alcohol as an ascape, or to stop myself thinking about any stress im experiencing.
    Thankyou again :)
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    Reeceddogg wrote: »
    I stopped drinking in Oct 2011 after asking myself, why was I drinking. I couldn't answer the question. I have the rest of my bottles away and haven't had one regret. I started drinking a lot more water and began my fitness journey. Was amassed at hire much better I felt, and hire much more energy I had.
    Wish everyone the best on AF life style

    Great question to ask yourself! Why am I drinking? Thanks for sharing that. Looks like your health and fitness journey is a success.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    Thistimeisit wrote: »
    Hello all.... today I have decided I need to get my life in order and healthy. A very beautiful soul, who was roughly my age of 52 died unexpectedly of a blood clot. Someone I, and many, considered very giving, loving and just a wonderful person. I cannot make sense of it at times. I guess sometimes it takes tragedy to wake you up?? I have been very cruel to this body God has given me. I drink alcohol daily, eat unhealthy and do not "move". I weigh around 350 pounds (how I got there is beyond me). It has been years since I did things I enjoy, as simple as crotchet and craft. But today, I take my life back. I am not ready to die! I have children still in school. I have not been a very good role model to them, and that needs to change!! I joined MFP and strapped in a Fit Bit today. I'm just trying to find the support to help me through this. Thank you and God Bless.

    Thought of you today! How are you doing? Let us know. <3
  • kcn2bluesky
    kcn2bluesky Posts: 187 Member
    RubyRed427 wrote: »
    Woke up and thanked GOD that I didn’t go out, drink, smoke anything, slept well, and now have the full day ahead of me to do anything I please. I’m so grateful today for a making a good decision.
    This is a wonderful update to wake up to today! There is plenty of time in your future to head out with friends to places that might test your resolve. For now, you did the right thing for yourself! Good job!
  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    RubyRed427 wrote: »
    pm9qxujisy0o.png
    Kind of ... the goal is also to be sober. ;)

    Your singin' my SONG girly-girl!! Self love begins with self care!! THIS is MY goal! SO easy to care for others & get lost in that, but self love enables you to care better for others if needed.

    ANYWAY, I am SO happy to hear that you listened to your gut & didn't put yourself in a position that you were not feeling comfortable with. As far as that being a "selfish" decision you are taking care of yourself and that is a really good thing.

    I am dog/house sitting for a client who is away for 2 weeks in the sunny south while I woke up to a lovely ground cover of snow...there home is on the water so it always looks way worse weather-wise than further inland. BUT the view is gorgeous!!

    Every time I open their fridge there is an open box of wine staring at me & a large unopened bottle in the back. Just as I was typing this, I thought of putting it in the bar fridge. I don't feel tempted BUT why stare at it if I don't have to. Problem solved. I'm actually having a more difficult time staying on track food-wise here. Why is that? I think it's feeling a little unsettled being in someone else's home as opposed to being in my own comfy spot. A different routine here??? Any ideas what's with that???

    Sounds like everyone has a handle on their individual challenges staying AF!! But we are doing it...YAY to us all!! <3
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    SurfyReturns wrote: »
    I have never been big on alcohol but I have been a pot smoker for most of my life until recently. I stopped for my ex lover, he didn't like it and honestly, I don't miss it. I have him to thank for that x

    Nice to see that you dont miss it. That is a positive!
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    @ElC_76 Congrats! You worked so hard to get to four weeks. I am so proud of you!!!! Keep it going. <3:)
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,416 Member
    edited November 2018
    http://www.hipsobriety.com/home/sobrietyisfabulous

    Hip Sobriety website has good articles and blogs..I like #5 especially on weekend mornings. No hangover!
    Also, I like “you’re like the vegan of liquor.”

    12 fabulous things about sobriety in the link.

    Let’s post our own lists. :)
  • ElC_76
    ElC_76 Posts: 3,054 Member
    CarvedTones wrote: »
    My top reason is pretty selfish yet not at the same time. I am close to 60, ad older problem drinkers have a much higher risk of poor health and early deaths. It's selfish because I want to enjoy a long and healthy/active retirement and it's not completely selfish because I have kids and other loved ones who want that also. Facing my problems is better than avoiding them. Most you can get past even if they involve uncomfortable decisions; you never get past things you avoid facing. Problem drinking itself is one such problem.

    Great attitude! Very good reasoning.
    I think alcohol is some of the cause for the denial that goes with it. I live with someone that totally does not think it's a problem to them. Yet its created More problems. Irresponsibiity, violence carelessness.. the list goes on. They don't see what we see. To them its there remedy and there reward, only nothing is changing. I can say I've used to be there but glad I've become aware. I wish I could help THEM, I have tried and been unsuccessful.
    The eldest is in their early 50s, I guess I have to wait till they come to themselves. I hope its soon bc there's a lot of damage happening plus the older we get the harder it is to change.

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