WLS support and inspirational information
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Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for August 20, 2010
Katie Jay, MSW
Don't get too hungry.
Getting too hungry can be a form of self-sabotage. When you allow yourself to get really hungry, it is much harder to make good food choices. It is harder to care about what you are putting in your mouth. It is much easier to choose something that is instantly gratifying and unhealthy.
So, eat enough and eat frequently enough that you don't get too hungry. Remember that eating less is not necessarily equated with losing weight. Eating enough is a better approach. Then, your metabolism will stay revved up and you won't get too hungry.
Space your meals a bit closer together, and add protein-based snacks in your day if you know it will be a long time before your next meal.
Action for the day: Make a food plan today that will keep you from getting too hungry. See how you do. Tomorrow, make a food plan based on what you learned today.
© 2007, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. All rights reserved. Daily Inspirations are provided by the National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. Get our free report, How to Regain-Proof Your Weight Loss Surgery at .www.nawls.com0 -
Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for August 21, 2010
Katie Jay, MSW
Be realistic.
While many WLS patients wish they could be at some magical weight they consider ideal, the weight you choose needs to be realistic. Not necessarily what you weighed in college or when you got married. Not necessarily less than your sister.
Are you shooting for a weight that you can live with, even if it doesn't match the "magic number" you long to see on the scale? Are you capable of performing your desired activities? Are you healthy? Can you maintain the necessary lifestyle in order to maintain your ideal weight?
Action for the day: Think about your definition of an ideal weight. Are you aiming for a realistic number you can maintain? If not, explore why not. You could be sabotaging your success.
© 2007, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. All rights reserved. Daily Inspirations are provided by the National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. Get our free report, How to Regain-Proof Your Weight Loss Surgery at .www.nawls.com0 -
I love talking about goal weights and ideal weights!
It's not just being realistic. For a lot of people "being realistic" is code for "settling" and there really is no reason to "settle" for less than you are capable of to avoid failure. Unfortunately, I find a lot of bariatric programs have this attitude. They actively discourage their patients from choosing goal weights that give them a healthy BMI. They say things like: the average weight loss for RnY is 66% so you should expect to lose 66% of your excess weight. I say
to that!
OTOH, a lot of people get to within 10-20 lb. of their "ideal" weight and can't get any lower and they feel like a failure and that they are "so fat". But they aren't taking several factors into account:
1) For every pound you lose, you end up with approximately .1 lb of loose skin. So, if you lost 200 pounds, you probably have 20 pounds of loose skin -- give or take.
2) Once you get near a healthy weight, body composition is much more important than a number of the scale. Two examples: when I was 13, my BMI was 19. Now it's 22. However, I'm SMALLER today than I was back then. That's because I have more muscles and less body fat. The muscles weigh enough to make my BMI larger but the same weight of muscle takes up less space so my body volume is smaller. Also, I am 3 pounds heavier than I was at my lowest. But my clothes still fit the same. Well, except my bras, I went up a cup size after I stopped losing. Not something most people are going to complain about.
So, I could be sad that I don't weigh 113 any more but it would be dumb because I wanted those muscles and I'm not really bigger just because the scale says a higher number.
3) Sometimes it's better to be at a happy weight than an 'ideal' weight. If it means working out 2x as much as you want to and having treats half as often to get down to your HS weight but you can be 5 pound above that and have the life you want, why not take the 5 pounds? I see this as different than "being realistic" the way the Negative Nellies mean it. They mean "don't dream big or try for the ideal" while I mean "temper the ideal against what makes you happy".0 -
1) For every pound you lose, you end up with approximately .1 lb of loose skin. So, if you lost 200 pounds, you probably have 20 pounds of loose skin -- give or take.
Thanks for info! I did not know this. Good to know. and thanks for your take on ideal weight, goal weight and happy weight!. :flowerforyou:0 -
Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for August 23, 2010
Katie Jay, MSW
Avoid the L.G.M.
Everyone has met "perfect" people before. There are some people who--at least outwardly--appear able to accomplish great things at work, maintain impeccable health and raise a ridiculously happy family. And some of them aren't faking or hiding horrible secrets--they really are blessed in many ways. No matter how tempting it is, do not allow yourself to wallow in jealousy. It can lead to nothing positive.
If the "picture perfect" person is a friend of yours, it's even more important to avoid the L.G.M. (Little Green Monster). Jealousy has a tendency to push people away. And pushing away a successful friend can deprive you of much-needed support--not to mention a cheering section for when you accomplish a goal. Successful people didn't get that way on their own. They had the support and goodwill of friends along the way.
Action for the day: Instead of comparing yourself to someone else today, look at how far you have come on your WLS journey and encourage yourself.
© 2007, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. All rights reserved. Daily Inspirations are provided by the National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. Get our free report, How to Regain-Proof Your Weight Loss Surgery at .www.nawls.com0 -
Plus happy, successful people are happy when you succeed. So they aren't going to be a suble sabotager of your efforts.If the "picture perfect" person is a friend of yours, it's even more important to avoid the L.G.M. (Little Green Monster). Jealousy has a tendency to push people away. And pushing away a successful friend can deprive you of much-needed support--not to mention a cheering section for when you accomplish a goal. Successful people didn't get that way on their own. They had the support and goodwill of friends along the way.0 -
Plus happy, successful people are happy when you succeed. So they aren't going to be a suble sabotager of your efforts.If the "picture perfect" person is a friend of yours, it's even more important to avoid the L.G.M. (Little Green Monster). Jealousy has a tendency to push people away. And pushing away a successful friend can deprive you of much-needed support--not to mention a cheering section for when you accomplish a goal. Successful people didn't get that way on their own. They had the support and goodwill of friends along the way.
That is why I try to surround myself with more positive people. Positive people tend to be more successful and happy. That is why I try to work on being as positive as I can most days. I see the results of negativity.0 -
Why You Gain Weight
by Katie Jay, MSW, Certified Wellness Coach
Director, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery
www.nawls.com
When you see the scale go up a few pounds it's easy to panic.
A few pounds emotionally feels like a ton. You wonder if you
will ever be able to get off that extra weight, as if you were
David facing the Giant. You feel guilty for how you've eaten or
for skipping exercise.
Then, almost without a thought, you surrender. You tell yourself
you messed up, so you might as well give up. Let the Giant win.
That's why you gain weight
You see, it's not the few pounds that is the problem. They can
be lost. It's the giving up -- the "all or nothing" thinking
-- that is the real problem.
Try being honest with yourself
It's time to get out your sling shot and poke holes in this
lie you are telling yourself -- the lie about not being able
to take off a few pounds.
Your problem isn't the few pounds you've gained; it's not your
body. Your problem is in your mind. You start playing an old
tape in your head and believe it, even when it's not true.
You tell yourself you can't say no to chocolate. You are too
tired to exercise. You don't have time to cook. All lies.
Really.
Eliminate "I can't" from your vocabulary
As surely as David knocked down that big menace, you CAN
knock off a few pounds -- if you will stop telling yourself
you can't do it.
Act on the facts, not on your feelings
You CAN take action to drop the pounds no matter what you're
feeling. This new way of being will take some practice, but
you will get better at it over time.
Here's how to act on facts, not feelings, to defeat the Giant:
1) Take aim. Figure out what your target weight is and make a
little chart to track your progress -- and then use it! (If
you're like me, you'll be tempted to skip this step, but that's
the old tape. This time, don't skip what seems silly or useless
-- that's a lie.)
2) Use your tool. David had a great sling shot to use and a nice
sized stone, I bet. You have your tool, too -- your weight loss
surgery.
Follow all of your surgeon's guidelines (yes, dig out the papers
you were given at orientation or call and ask for a new set to
be mailed to you -- and then read them every day for a week).
And at meal time, try chewing forever, and not drinking with
meals, and eating dense proteins to fill you up.
3) Feel your feelings and do it anyway. David must have been
terrified, but he didn't let that stop him. He bravely walked
out into the open and faced the Giant.
You can face your powerful foe, too -- your negativity. Feel
your feelings: anger, fear, sadness, deprivation, defiance,
shame, disappointment, whatever they are ... and then do the
next right thing anyway. Don't let your feelings dictate your
actions today.
Be like David
Like the people David was defending, your life is depending on
you. Your hopes and dreams need you to protect them. Your
health and productivity need you to stand up for them.
When David stepped out, he had no guarantee he would win. He
took a leap of faith and acted. He felt the fear and did it
anyway.
It's your turn.
*****************************************************************
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Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for August 24, 2010
Katie Jay, MSW
Treat your emotions as clues.
The best solution for emotional eating is for you to become an ace detective. Treat your emotions as intriguing mysteries to be solved, not pains to be numbed. Your long-term weight loss depends on it.
By calling your emotions "clues" instead of "crises" you can discover your emotional-eating triggers and develop an action strategy (like journaling or calling a friend) instead of a reaction response (yelling at your family or indulging in an unhealthy food to get rid of your strong emotion).
Action for the day: For today, treat your emotions as clues. Instead of reacting to your emotions, take a look at them individually and ask yourself, "What is this emotion trying to tell me?"
© 2007, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. All rights reserved. Daily Inspirations are provided by the National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. Get our free report, How to Regain-Proof Your Weight Loss Surgery at .www.nawls.com0 -
Hello ALL,
Let me know if you are interested in taking this class for only $97 bucks starting Wednesday October 6th. Katie discounted the price when I told her I am going to try to get 8 of my own friends to sign up. I need six more students. Send me a personal message if interested and I will send you the link and give you more details. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi Molly!
Here are the details, including the cost. If you are interested, just click on the link at the end of this email.
Warmly,
Katie
Train to Maintain Teleclass
Who: Anyone who has had any type of bariatric surgery (we’re accepting 8 people – tops!)
What: 5 weekly teleclasses on Wednesday evenings at 8pm Eastern (Sept. 1, 8, 15, 22, and 29)
We'll be covering topics such as:
** How to Boost Your Metabolism
** Identifying and Avoiding Trigger Foods and Situations
** Managing Emotional Eating
** How to Get Off Sugar and Get on with Your Life
** Stubborn Weight Regain
** How to Lose Your "Fat" Personality and Take Charge!
** The Secrets to Maintaining Weight Loss for Life
Plus: You’ll receive all of the classes on CD, when the class is done, so you can listen again and again (as many have done in the past!). We’ll also provide a downloadable action guide for the class.
Bonus! You’ll also receive one, 30-minute complimentary private telecoaching session with Katie. (Schedule anytime!) These are great to use as follow-up after the class or if you have a specific issue you would like to discuss.
Investment: $127.00 (NAWLS members get 10% off!)0 -
Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for August 25, 2010
Katie Jay, MSW
Ask for directions.
You may think all necessary WLS information was given to you during that initial phase when you began your WLS process. You may feel as though there isn't anything else you can learn at this point. But remember: medical research leads to new findings all the time, and if you are not consistently asking questions, you may as well be driving around in circles.
It can be humbling to ask for "directions"--it makes you feel inadequate and you may worry that others think you are weak or incapable of figuring things out for yourself. Swallow your pride and seek advice from trusted experts. You may find that new roads were constructed while you were looking elsewhere.
Action for the day: Identify one WLS-related issue that has been concerning you lately, and research up-to-date answers from trusted sources.
© 2007, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. All rights reserved. Daily Inspirations are provided by the National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. Get our free report, How to Regain-Proof Your Weight Loss Surgery at .www.nawls.com0 -
A Simple Way to Get Past Your Resistance
by Katie Jay, MSW, CTA Certified Life Coach
Director, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery
I have been going to dog-training classes. My dog is not the
problem. I am. I can't seem to be consistent in my approach
to Ruby, so in her confusion she misbehaves.
It's my responsibility to set boundaries with Ruby so that
she knows what to do, but I feel inadequate. I'm too busy.
I forget to practice. I'd rather do something else. I have
to work. I have a million excuses.
My resistance creates unwanted consequences
For awhile Ruby's indiscretions (a.k.a. my unwillingness to
train my dog) were tolerable. She chewed a pair of my son's
tube socks. She ate the cat's food. She pulled on the leash
when I walked her.
But things have gotten worse. Ruby nips me to let me know
it is time for her walk. She dines on litter-box fare (yuck!).
She jumps onto the furniture when we turn our backs.
I have to get past my resistance
If I continue to let Ruby get away with these antics, and
inevitably let things get worse, my life is going to get a
lot more chaotic. And the consequences will become dire.
(Sadly, it's at this point that many families give their
pets back to the adoption agency. The problem goes from
cute to annoying to intolerable.)
Resistance undermines weight loss surgery progress, too
When my hunger came back after weight loss surgery, it
was almost cute at first. I ate half of a french fry and
one bite of a dessert at a wedding reception. I felt
petite and in control.
I was resisting my surgeon's guidelines, but rationalized
that I followed most of them
For awhile my indiscretions (a.k.a. my unwillingness to
follow my plan) were tolerable. I wasn't gaining weight
and I felt great.
But things got worse. I started eating popcorn every
night. I quit exercising at the gym. I ate toast
with butter at bedtime.
And my food cravings got worse
So, I pushed my limits ever further. As this happened,
I began to negotiate with myself about everything. Could
I eat this at 3pm if I ate less of something at dinner?
How many calories is that snack food and maybe it's okay
to eat if I skip my protein drink (thus avoiding the
extra calories).
It was annoying to always be negotiating with myself,
pushing the boundaries. The consequences became more
dire; I gained a few pounds.
Now my behavior felt intolerable to me
A few pounds is not a big concern in the vast scheme of
things. But it is at this point that many weight loss
surgery patients give up. But I didn't give up.
Like Ruby, I needed clearer limits
I was in pure resistance mode. I was out of control and
looking for trouble.
Unlike my dog, though, I could identify my resistance
and make a decision to set better limits for myself.
So, that's what I did.
I used my husband's motto to challenge myself
As my biggest cheerleader, Mike has always supported me
in my efforts at self improvement and with my dream to
help others overcome obesity.
During times when I have felt uncertain or fearful or
discouraged he has put his hands on my shoulders, looked
me in the eyes, and made me repeat after him:
"I am a winner."
He makes me say it until I really feel it. Sometimes I
get really mad at him, but he persists until he breaks
my resistance.
One morning, Mike noticed I did not write down a food
plan or seem to have any intention of making one. So,
he made me say that phrase. It's hard to feel resistance
and feel like a winner at the same time. So, for a few
moments, as we looked into each other's eyes, I felt
like a winner.
Over the course of that day I decided to keep saying
it to myself
I got past my resistance to healthier eating using my
own version of Mike's saying:
"I'm a winner, and winners _____________________."
I filled in the blank depending on what I was doing. So,
when I wanted to eat fast food for lunch, I told myself:
"I'm a winner, and winners eat *healthy*, great-tasting
meals."
When I wanted to skip going to the gym, I told myself:
"I'm a winner, and winners exercise daily."
And when I wanted to eat that french fry, I told myself:
"I'm a winner, and winners eat healthy fats, not trans fats."
Everyone wants to win
When I look at my choices from the vantage point of being
a winner, it's easy to see which choices will serve me
well and which ones won't.
When I feel like a winner, I am much happier to do the
next right thing -- to resist the temptation to overeat
or to pick unhealthy foods.
Do you want to feel like a winner?
No, you can't borrow Mike! Go stand in front of your
mirror, and look into your own eyes. Smile broadly and
say, "I'm a winner!"
************************************************************0 -
RECOVERY MEDITATIONS
One Day at a Time
August 27, 2010
~ PERFECTION ~
:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:
People throw away what they could have
by insisting on perfection, which they cannot have,
and looking for it where they will never find it.
Edith Schaeffer
:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:
Time and time again I felt like I was
suspended from two ropes, being flogged
for my imperfections. The tragic fact of
that vision was that I was the person
wielding the whip!
Before my eyes, heart and mind were
opened by the Twelve Steps and
Traditions, I sought perfection in
everything I attempted. A simple letter
would be written and rewritten until I
was satisfied that perfection had been
achieved and the letter could be
sent. Frequently the goal was not
reached and I would abandon the project
in frustration, bitterly disappointed
with myself. Events that I organized had
to be executed with the utmost
precision. If, God forbid, a mistake was
made, I would beat myself up over it for
days until sheer mental and emotional
exhaustion prevailed.
Ironically, I never sought perfection in
others and accepted that it was okay for
them to be human. However, seeking
perfection within myself became an
obsession tangled with the search for
self-acceptance. Needless to say, a
rainbow cannot be seen through closed
eyes, and I never found that which I
sought. Through the teachings of the
Twelve Steps, I have come to appreciate
that the beauty within myself is that I
am not perfect. Through my mistakes I
can grow, through my imperfections I can
find serenity and release from the
struggle.
ONE DAY AT A TIME . . .
I will accept that I am perfectly
imperfect.0 -
Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for August 27, 2010
Katie Jay, MSW
Compare yourself to yourself.
How many times have you been intimidated by someone who holds a higher societal position than you? Whether it's a "higher-up" at work or anyone else who has a "bigger" job or higher salary, we all feel puny in comparison to someone else at least once in life. But why do you feel that someone with a more impressive job title or fancier car is better than you? At the end of the day, that person goes home to a family life just as complicated as yours, maybe even more so. He may be surrounded by leather seats and a stereo system, but he still gets stuck in the same traffic jams as you. And he may very well feel intimidated by people who occupy a station above his.
Allowing yourself to be intimidated only thwarts your efforts at reaching your dreams. Try not to compare your life to another's. We are all in the same boat; we all suffer misfortunes, and we all struggle with day-to-day life.
Action for the day: Write in your journal one accomplishment for which you are truly proud. Reflect on that accomplishment, knowing that you are strong enough to do even more.
© 2007, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. All rights reserved. Daily Inspirations are provided by the National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. Get our free report, How to Regain-Proof Your Weight Loss Surgery at .www.nawls.com0 -
Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for August 26, 2010
Katie Jay, MSW
Don't bunt.
Before WLS, you probably tried every diet in the book--and then some. You undoubtedly withstood a phenomenal amount of abuse. Many people struggling with obesity spend a good part of their lives in shame. Even after you reach your goal weight, it may be hard for you to appreciate your perseverance and victory in light of your past scars that you continue to carry with you. Don't let those scars slow you down. Now is not the time to hold back.
You were not put here on this earth to make a sacrifice bunt for other players. You were put here to accomplish extraordinary things. Step up to the plate! Even if you occasionally hit a fly ball, or only manage a single, one of your hits is bound to be a homer. Every single attempt you make could be your next home run, so act accordingly.
Action for the day: Whatever is on your task list for today, make a vow to do each thing with gusto. Whether it's washing the car or finishing up that project at work, knock it out of the park!
© 2007, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. All rights reserved. Daily Inspirations are provided by the National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. Get our free report, How to Regain-Proof Your Weight Loss Surgery at .www.nawls.com0 -
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Weight Loss Surgery Support:
Daily Inspiration for August 28, 2010 Katie Jay, MSW
Make "right decisions" a goal.
Do you set goals and track your progress? It's a well-known fact that you are more likely to reach a goal if you write it down and monitor your growth.
If you've been struggling to make good choices, make "making good choices" your goal. Create a chart, and put a star or other positive symbol on the days you make good and healthy choices. By tracking your right decisions, you'll see them increase.
Action for the day: Make a "right decisions" chart. In your journal, start a list of the right decisions you make. Looking back on the challenges you have overcome will inspire you.
© 2007, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. All rights reserved. Daily Inspirations are provided by the National Association for Weight Loss Surgery. Get our free report, How to Regain-Proof Your Weight Loss Surgery at .www.nawls.com0 -
I just saw this!Oh, I just noticed I didn't mark the Half-ironman as completed!
Hello MacMadame: What happens on November 21, 2010???? Just cusrious. This is the date on your avatar.
That's when I do my first Ironman.0 -
I just saw this!Oh, I just noticed I didn't mark the Half-ironman as completed!
Hello MacMadame: What happens on November 21, 2010???? Just cusrious. This is the date on your avatar.
That's when I do my first Ironman.
Awesome!!! A woman on a mission.....:-)0 -
I just signed up for a second one next year too.
0
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