WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR AUGUST 2021

barbiecat

The journey to weight loss, health, and fitness has worked well for me when I am in the company of encouraging and supportive friends. That's what this thread is all about.

The name is "Women Ages 50+" but all women are welcome. Please join in the conversation.
Be sure to bookmark this page so you can find it again.

It is helpful to all if you sign your posts with a name or nickname and a location, specific or general. This helps us know each other better.

I look forward to sharing August with you.


My theme for 2021 is "lighten up"--this pertains to my weight and to my approach to life.

okiewoman510

Barbie - Thanks for leading us into August!

Okie in the TX Hill Country

Snowflake1968

Barbie - I can’t believe we’re into August already! Time goes so fast.

Thanks for a new month.
Tracey in Edmonton

grandmallie

Thanks again Barbie !!

pipcd34

Kjlamore- did you get ,my link ok?

csofled

❤️August❤️

linder4866

❤️❤️👍🏻👍🏻❤️❤️

margaretturk

Thank you Barbie!

Whidislander

Thank you Barbie, for starting us off right, for August.
I have my bus ticket for going to sisters on 12th. Staying until 22nd, then stay at son's until the 25 or 26th. Haven't gotten that confirmed with him yet. I'm excited to see my sister. Our last visit was 2019, when I took the train to see her in Montana. Now she's in Oregon.
Today ate cereal, my bit of cabbage and potato soup, and son brought sushi home. Him and I ate California rolls, and crab with a sliver of cream cheese inside then tempura fried on the outside. It was delightful! He's a good kid. I made beef noodle hamburger helper for Lee. Today its cold, gray and I have been reading most of the day.
Rebecca
Whidbey
Washington

pipcd34

Got a call from the vet regarding the results of Yogi’s bloodwork. It all started when we went to the new vet to make an appointment to get his teeth cleaned. Because they put him under they do a blood check to make sure they are not going to have any issues. Apparently His numbers for kidney disease had given them concern. He has never shown any signs of anything. They put him on a prescription diet. This is the second time they have done bloodwork. This time nothing as far as the numbers have really changed, they haven’t increased which is good. BUT she gave us the okay to make him an appointment to get his teeth cleaned which is great. He will b on the prescription food diet for the rest of his life tho. Will call Monday to get an appointment to get his teefers cleaned. My 7-1/2 yr old is a champ.

exermom

Pip – Lexi is on a special diet for kidney. What food will you be giving Yogi?

Rebecca – I don’t know why, but you mentioning sushi reminded me that I need to go to WalMart tomorrow to get things for gezpacho that I want to make.

Pool party was nice. I guess we had about 20 people here. I didn’t think that too bad since this was really the first “formal” social that Newcomers has had. I do hope for Cathy’s sake (the president) that this variant turns out to be not so bad. One gal left her bag here so she’ll be coming by tomorrow to get it.

She was talking to me about having Rummikub in people’s homes. Really, when we used to do that (pre-pandemic) it was not easy at all to get people to have it in their homes. To be honest, I don’t feel that she should do it one month, me the next, her the next, etc. That just isn’t fair. I’m really not hopeful that people will do this now if they didn’t before. It looks like there are a lot of activity chair openings, and no one is stepping forward. I just don’t know. I guess I should give it a try, but I really don’t hold out a lot of hope. I guess I'm afraid that she is going to do it all the time in her house, and I don't think that's fair.

Michele NC

trucker743

Pip! glad to hear they’re keeping tabs on Yogi’s health. He’s a special little guy.

Oh, Allie! when I think of where your life was a year ago and how much had changed now, I’m amazed. Keep following those dreams, gal!

I do have shocking news I went and spent about a week with my son and his wife whom I gave for adoption 57-1/2 years ago. We had a great time. I brought photos and shared family history both ancestry-wise and medical, which he particularly wanted.


When I left he was talking about how great it would be to come out here and visit. He spent time in the navy over in Bremerton and would love to see it again.

Five days after my return I get the following message:

“ Let me start out by saying that i am glad we got the chance to meet face to face and exchange history and information. I know how much it meant for you and it was important for me as well. However, i think it meant much more to you than it does for me. I am so grateful and happy that you were able to give birth to me. Even more so that you were set on making sure i was adopted by a good family. However, while i am happy we met, i feel i would be remiss not saying that my only sense of familial attachment is to my family here in Ohio. Im am sorry if this hurts but i request no more contact be made with me. Please respect this and i wish you all blessings and happiness. “

I am in shock. I have no idea why the sudden turn around. I GET the primary attachment to his adopted family, wife, children and grandchildren. He’s totally wrong about what seeing him meant to me. I too still have more attachment to my family than to him and his. There were no jarring note that I felt while I was there. He’s unfriended and blocked my entire family including the sisters he hadn’t gotten to meet. I’m not broken hearted or anything like that. I guess I’m just left with my jaw hanging down going “WTF?!?” I’m literally still feeling stunned.

Anyway, that’s what’s happening in my life right now

Sharon In Seattle

GodMomKim

Hi Gals,
Barbie – thanks for bringing us into August!
Sharon – I can’t imagine how you are feeling…. The whole thing is topsy turvy! But my first thought (totally random!) is someone in his family is scared that having a relationship with you and his birth siblings will affect his relationship with them, and he felt forced to choose. And that maybe that person would be seeing the email he sent you so he could not share the whole truth, or he felt this would be easier/less hurtful.
It’s sad as our hearts always have room for one more….
Smiles, Kim in Northern California

KetoneKaren

Sharon

Sharon, this is a fairly classic example of projection.

It must have meant the world for him to see you.

Blocking you on social media is indicative of how much it meant to him.

It breaks my heart for your son. And I'm sad for you, too, but mostly sad for him.

Maybe he'll come around. Maybe he won't. As Kim mentioned, it's possible it may have freaked out a family member.

I think it's far more likely that it freaked out...him.

Love,

Karen in Virginia
.

LisaInArkansas

Sharon - good to see you, as always - and what a strange direction that all took with your son. You have to wonder what the motivation was to sever all ties, but it sounds as if you will never know what the trigger was for that action. So strange.

Happy August to all - as I said yesterday, I was able to keep two of my three July goals: Be lighter (three pounds), stick to a budget (did) and be healthier (kind of a toss-up, honestly. Still working on it).

Same goals for August. Be lighter than 184.5, stick to a budget, and be healthier.

Later, y'all,
Love,
Lisa

cityjaneLondon

Sharon - I'm struggling to find the words to offer you, but I send all my sympathy. To both of you. Both Kim and Karen are probably right. These things turn our whole sense of identity upside down and not everyone has the mental equipment to deal with change. Especially men. You can still keep loving him in your heart. Lovely photo.
Thinking of you. Actually, I do think of you often. You are a woman of great courage and resources and I appreciate your sharing with us. Love

Heather UK xxxxxxxx

bananasandoranges

Thanks for starting us off Barbie, as always!

Sharon, Nice to hear from you. Nice picture. That is really sad. One thought is that he called it "exchanging" history and medical information, but I assume that it was more in one direction : where you were giving him medical information and history and less of the opposite.
Spending a week together is huge for a first contact. (If I get that) I think in most cases one would meet for a meal or coffee for 1st time. And to spend a week together have a great time and plan to meet again and then turn around is really a testimony to the unpredictableness of human nature.
He must be having emotional upheavals about it - or maybe his adoptive parents (assuming one or both are alive) or other adoptive family members are really upset, have even giving him grief about it in a major way.
It might be- in other ways (relationship, work, self-identity)- a challenging time in his life - and it's hard for him to integrate a major shift in his feeling about his origins into his life right now.

Personally I would think it's acceptable for you to write to him one last time and also express your thoughts, like. "I found it delightful to meet, and discover who you have become. I'm glad you were able to get information about history and health that may help you in your future. I wish you all the best." or something like that.

I find it pretty unfair for a person to surprise and express and say "you can't answer."

Banana--I have seen at the dermatologist office, hats and shirts to wear in the sun that are light weight and cover.

Vicki, yes there must be some. Its a thing to learn. yesterday I wore a knee length summer dress with long sleeves. I wasn't outside most of the day. In the city apartments we are just not. I put sunscreen on my lower legs. I was a bit fed up with wearing long sleeves and pants all the time in summer. it feels like I'm compelled by one of many religions or cultures that require covering up.

bananasandoranges

Went out to a colleague's b-day party yesterday. I knew very few people. it was an amazing place - she's an architect and converted an old near-ruin of a rough workshop into a very cool home, with 2 years work. Very impressive. there was a band. I danced for the 1st time in over a year. I felt a bit out of shape that way, but it was good to get back into it a bit. It was a bit of a hike on public transport- about an hour. A few of us were together - and with a friend-colleague I know rather well, for half of the train/subway trip home.


At the party there was the colleague (who is 46)'s mother who seemed amazingly nice. She seemed young-ish, health, in great shape, very close to her daughter, not quirky at all.

Thoughts about my mother.

That's maybe horrible to think but I thought wow how nice it would have be to have a mother like that. My mother was "morbidly obese" most of her life (like over 300 pounds sometimes for 5'2" - less so in her old age as it requires a lot of physical energy to maintain so much weight. But more importantly extremely quirky socially. She was very smart and activist and sometimes wrote letters to politicians that really had impact and she was also funny and pleasant and loving sometimes. But she was really paranoid, extremely messy, and thus had almost no social contacts at the end of her life. When they divorced after 25 years or so of being a housewife from the 50s to the 70s and raising 5 kids, she got alimony that was maybe 1/5 of my dad's salary at most, and absolutely none of the savings, nor the house which is just crazy. Her dad had left her 15000 dollars at the time and she was able with that to buy a breezy cute old historic house that had freezing pipes in the winter. The lack of money surely contributed to her reclusiveness. She could not dress nicely nor go out for meals or much of anything. She managed to always have a car that ran well, and a rental apartment later in life, (then she stayed with my older sister for a while before going to a nursing home) but she couldn't buy clothes much, and sometimes sewed clothes out of grey sheets. She only dressed in grey sweats for many years at the end. She was also full of spunk and repartee. after taking anti-depressants and getting some kind of care at hospital and then nursing home the last years, she became much more pleasant than she had been the previous years (where she had been prone to being unpleasantly snappy at times- not all the time). She was rather high integrity and activist, and ecological, too, in advance politically for her times - was working very actively for civil rights in the fifties in the south -and sometime very attentive and affectionate. But pretty much she was not really "there" that much - could not be any reliable support after I went to college. Once I called her when I was in college and she said "It doesn't SOUND like you." She thought someone else was impersonating me and she cut the call short. I spend a year and half living near her and taking care of her (food shopping, visiting, taking her out) shortly after my college years when she had a bout with cancer and suddenly lost half her weight. And I used to call her once a week in her later life when she was at the nursing home and her conversations were more caring and attentive. She would ask about me and repart the wisdom that she had and tell about her life. But I see this woman caring for her grandkids, taking them on vacation, having a totally normal conversation with us on the train back, and they clearly very much enjoy one another. My other colleague had to come back from abroad, due to a bike accident, but he and his son are is going to his mom's country place for the rest of the vacation period. I know lots of people and some you have much harder experiences with parents. Nonetheless those are my thoughts at the moment.

people met at party -ages

I was talking with this one considerably older guy a bit - the guy a was talking to later was a bit focused on that guy's age - not sure why - guessed he was 70-77. (I'm 57).
I saw that the B-day girl's mom (who must be in her 70s) was looking at the older guy quite a bit - they are both in excellent shape! And the older guy seemed rather focused on me, which I found really annoying. He kept hovering about. It's no big deal but I found it annoying that these two people really similar in age and sharp and in great shape. and then the guy focusses on someone about 20 years younger. I didn't find that uplifting.

Otherwise I enjoyed talking to people for the most part. also ran into and spoke with a student from a couple of years ago and spoke quite a bit with him. I was a bit confused as I work at two schools and the colleague is at one school and the student is at the other school (same field). They met not at schools but as neighbours as he was interested in the exterior decor of her house and asked her about it one day as he was walking by.

Whinge-communication

I'm supposed to meet up with this ex-classmate for an interview thing. he's now living in the same city as me. but he says he doesn't have a cellphone as he is "trying to get his old cellphone working" - after at least month. He says their landline doesn't ring and that he has to go to the library for internet. So for example we met last Saturday - at the place he's staying with his now-girlfriend, spontaneous invitation for spontaneous dinner- and we agreed we could later meet to talk about this interview thing. (at the dinner there were a few other people and it wasn't an ideal time to steal away to talk about work). then he wrote to me on Sunday last week so I wrote on Monday, to make some suggestions of meeting (on Tuesday and thursday evening). Then he doesn't answer till Friday morning, (5 days later) calling, saying he can only talk to me if I pick up the phone at the moment he calls. That he's going out for the day but maybe could meet me in the evening but since I wasn't picking up there was no possibility. I had plans for the evening. Then yesterday he calls me at midday (but I didn't get the message right away) and suggests meeting and says I can call back on his girlfriends cell phone, which I finally did, but again I had plans for the evening, was already on my way out. He says, "you have to pick up if you want to be in touch". He called yesterday when I was at the party but the music was very loud, and my phone was in my bag, far away from me. He was a real live wire, all over the place in school, sort of a witty -sometimes inappropriate class clown. I was not a major fan, though he seems to have somewhat more self-awareness with age.he might have attention issues as he says he doesn't know how to use zoom on his own, and he's not lacking in intelligence. I'm sure he is not rolling in money but I'm sure he can get a cheap phone if he wants to.

today I should call him, but I don't really want to bother much today, and they are going away for 3 weeks tomorrow. maybe I'll see him after... he's about an hour away- so a bit of a hike in public transport of 45 min each way by scooter.

but I'm also behind in stuff related to the interview. "my bad" (I hate that expression "my bad"!)
(our old school wants to interview us. I can send a blurb and some pics to the school.

Katla49

Barbie— Thank you for the new August thread. ❤️

cityjaneLondon

Proud of myself for completing my exercise regime today after DH left for the cricket. :laugh: The temptation to 'scive off' was very strong. But I gave myself a good talking to and completed it.

Day to myself, providing it doesn't rain over in Southampton.

Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx

auntiebk

"Get to do"s and "chose well"s

Chose well: BP, typed hymns, dogs to powerline, spicy pecans for Re’s birthday, dog group, strain and season goat cheese,
Bonus: walked in place to highest point in Sacto county and half way to 49 palms oasis. Thank you walkfit on YouTube!
Get to do: take BP, dogs to powerline, church, fellowship help, figure out how to see what’s using all our mobile data, USE those torture bands/do that BB&B video, call S, Monday: call Cigna to change monthly summary from large to regular print, fire district: research NFPA, grant NIMS requirements, ongoing: input 2019 call sheets into NFIRS, work with chief on equipment letter, substance abuse policy, NFIRS mutual aid and other missing details, likewise Lee skills/tasks, ask for boots donator contact info, appreciation letter or certificate to boots donator, index mutual aid files; watch STAS Day 20, declutter sideboard, learn new dances (Tequila Little Time, Homesick, Nothing but You, A Little Less Broken, Blame it on my beating heart,; Do Your Thing, practice dances: One Margarita, I’m so used to being broke, All Night, Pure Movies to Wine, Beer, Whiskey, I ain’t never gonna love nobody but Cornell Crawford (Alley cat),); finish mulching flowerbed, invest another 10 minutes in prepping living trust, Freddie’s for complete series TDAP <$48, get Shingrix vaccine, find and configure a screen time popup, figure out where to plant the last of the naked lady bulbs, and soon as it warms up above 50 and dries out below 60% humidity I’ll tape and spray paint those rusted areas of Aunt Elsie’s stove, ask Terry about GB’s FD firetruck tax levy – contacts, media, advocate???, Reward: inventory seeds, plan this fall’s garden, wishlist replenishments (Milena F1 orange peppers and beit alpha cukes next year).
August
1:Set an intention to be kind to others (and yourself) this month-and re-set as often as needed

July Summary and August Plan

More improvements than not, even if some were tiny.
Cleaning commitment still needs work. Why is it so easy to waste 10 mins playing FreeCell and Spider and so hard to stand up and dust for 10 mins?
Tumble time improved but Shadow’s fell back to last month’s level.
Barely managed to maintain/improve steps, average crept up to 6704 from 6701.
AF days improved back to May’s levels.
Joe time, vits, CI<CO days all way better.

Weigiht down microscopically to lowest so far this year, I’ll take it!.
July results:
daily: sit with Joe: 106%/93%, steps=average: 6705 vs 6701 step days:61%/57%, vits=92%/80% log=100%/100% CI<CO= 84%/93% CI<250<CO=90%73% Tumble 5/10=71%/47% Shadow 5/10=60%/71% mfp=97%/77% AF=71%/53% outside= 129%/117%, up hill=110%/83% cleaning61%/200%
wkly: BBBorTC x3=100%/78%, dance=75%/80% walk with T or Joe and the dogs or pack walk x2=89%/78%, rx=100%/120% review progress on 21 goals: bupkes/.
monthly: board mtg=100%/100% grant=2/0
July 31: 140.2 June 30: 141.5 May 31:142.4 Apr 30:141.5 Mar 31:145.3 Feb 28:142.4 Jan 31:141.3 Jan 1:145.3 Dec 1:143.3 Jan 1 2020: 142.3
Waist: 42.0/42.0 thank goodness.

August resolve- .
Commit to daily: 10 mins cleaning before solitaire, be really present with Joe, get those dogs down to the powerline without fail. Link to other daily habits.
Weekly: Tuesday 2 hr line dance. Wed 1 hr T’ai Chi & 1 hr pack walk. Fri: 1 hr T’ai Chi. Mon,Thurs, Sun: 15 mins BB&B, pilates, yoga or wii balance games. Sat: 1 hr pack walk.
Keep walking with T, D & R. Encourage Joe to walk.

Wow. August already. Thank you Barbie for your unfailing presence! “… but the seeds that you plant” 
Lisa would you share some first/second sleep resources? Might describe the pattern I fell into at retirement
Terri your solid habits. I’m with you on 1-3 and growing toward the steps and active hours. “tinyhabits” hmm.
Rebecca you’ve given me canner’s pantry envy. :laugh:
Rita thanks. Those mesquite pods look a lot like my bolted mustards' and arugula seed pods, though bigger. Remind me how you’ll use them?
Margaret :`( for the smoke and the stings. Rotten combination.
Pip Yogi is lucky you take such good care of him. Dental care and special diets can be life-enhancing as well as life-extending.
Sharon what a stunner. While what family attachment I felt was with my adoptive family, I feel kindly toward my bio family, though we are not close. Could it be some facebook related thing? Might you and your daughters have different views that he doesn’t want to see on his feed? (((hugs held extra long)))
Kim, Karen, Julie your insights into Sharon’s son’s message are most perceptive. I would never have searched for my bio family until both Mama and Papa had died. It would have hurt them too much.
Julie :`( and hugs for difficult times with your mother. If it were me, I’d provide my old school with an individual “interview” blurb and suggest the ex-classmate do the same.

Sleepy again at last.

Lighter, lovelies!
Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD

July: leaner/stronger/kinder than June.
daily: sit with Joe: 33, weigh/wii: 30/0/0; steps>6701=10150 vits=28.5, log=31, CI<CO=28, CI<250<CO=27, Tumble=22, Shadow=26, mfp=30, outside=40, up hill=34, clean 10=19.
wkly: Sun: Mon: Tue:LD=. Wed:TC=3, PW=2. Thurs: Fri:TC=5. Sat:PW=5. rX x5=4.
wt=1/31:141.3 2/28:142.4 3/31:145.3 4/30:141.5 5/31:142.4 6/30:141.5 7/4: 140.7 7/11: 142.9 grr! 7/18: 141.8
7/25: 140.4  7/31:140.2!!!
mnthly: board mtg=1, grant=, 21 plan=, waist=42.0
bonus: AF=22 play= sew=

2021: choose to be leaner/stronger/kinder NOW