WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR AUGUST 2021

grandmallie · August 2021

Well ladies I am home and in bed. I am beat
All in all it was a hot mess Tal and I went out to eat at a seafood place they could seat us right away but there was a 2 hr back up in the kitchen Uhhh no,Tal was just not in the mood,i had taken a little nap so I was able to drive home but ,geesh I dont like driving in the dark..
I did get a letter from Social security i have to look it over but think I am set for disability starting from September 2020.. will have to read more.. to tired tonight..

GodMomKim · August 2021

Hi Gals,

Rori – ((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))) thinking of you

Carol – glad you got the prescription situation worked out.

The embroidery business has been very busy – A bit overwhelming but I am loving it and my check book/savings account are breathing easier. It is a bit hard to fit in a bit of me time and time with friends. The other thing that has impacted my time is I am spending one full day a week with my mom. I brought her home with me last Thursday and brought her home today I think it was a nice break for her – I did the cooking/dishes/etc. She is 92.5 and is slowing down. We also celebrated my 63rd birthday which is tomorrow, I’ll be spending it with my “pandemic pod”.

Allie your story about your granddaughter made me think of a time with my god kids/nephews-nieces. One weekend when they were about 5, 7 and 10 years old (they are in their late 20’s now) They were all spending the weekend with me. I had driven about an hour to pick them up and on the drive to my house we decided on what we were having for dinner. We got home, I asked them to set the table, feed the dog and empty the trash. The 5 year old said no I don’t do chores – I asked if any of us should have to do chores? He said no. Even me? I asked… right no chores at all. Ok I said, and poured a glass of wine and went out to the patio with a book. About 10 minutes later they came out to see when we were having dinner, I explained that had been my chore and I wasn’t doing it. They talked about it and asked if we could go out, sure said I but who is paying for it? You are they said and I explained that I had done work chores to earn that money so it wasn’t available. More talking among themselves and the oldest came out and said he’d do all the chores cause he was starving (LOL) I told him to just wait and it would be ok – (I was hoping this would work out) Sure enough I can hear them and in short order all the chores were done by each of them, and I went in and made dinner. And 15 + years later and I have never had one of those kids say no if I ask for help – and most of the time the question is what do you need help with Aunt Kim….

So my advice is set a limit (small and reasonable) and don’t let them walk on you. If you want to go out for seafood dinner and your granddaughter doesn’t want to go, Explain in as few words as possible that you are going to dinner, you would like her to come, you will not be bringing anything home for her, you will not be going to multiple places and if she chooses not to come she will not be fed until tomorrow morning. It will only take one time for her to get the picture. She has learned how to manipulate the adults around her, and it is not a good look. And one time of following through and it puts them on notice that there are consequences, and they may not like them. In my case it was hard at first but only lasted 30 minute and the results have lasted years.

Smiles, Kim in Northern California

auntiebk · August 2021

"Get to do"s and "chose well"s

Chose well: BP, dog group,
Bonus: Art in Azalea Park, 15 mins chair pilates, 15 mins clelaning drains in Joe’s bathroom (ugh!).
Get to do: take BP, dogs to powerline, church, send out minutes and meeting reminder, figure out how to see what’s using all our mobile data, USE those torture bands/do that BB&B video, call S, fire district: research NFPA, grant NIMS requirements, ongoing: input 2019 call sheets into NFIRS, work with chief on equipment letter, substance abuse policy, NFIRS mutual aid and other missing details, likewise Lee skills/tasks, ask for boots donator contact info, appreciation letter or certificate to boots donator, index mutual aid files; watch STAS Day 20, declutter sideboard, learn new dances (Tequila Little Time, Homesick, Nothing but You, A Little Less Broken, Blame it on my beating heart,; Do Your Thing, practice dances: One Margarita, I’m so used to being broke, All Night, Pure Movies to Wine, Beer, Whiskey, I ain’t never gonna love nobody but Cornell Crawford (Alley cat),); finish mulching flowerbed, invest another 10 minutes in prepping living trust, Freddie’s for complete series TDAP <$48, get Shingrix vaccine, find and configure a screen time popup, figure out where to plant the last of the naked lady bulbs, and soon as it warms up above 50 and dries out below 60% humidity I’ll tape and spray paint those rusted areas of Aunt Elsie’s stove, ask Terry about GB’s FD firetruck tax levy – contacts, media, advocate???, Reward: inventory seeds, plan this fall’s garden, wishlist replenishments (Milena F1 orange peppers and beit alpha cukes next year).
August
4: Ask someone how they feel and really listen to their reply: finally, Joe, really listened to what he’s saying and gave him time to say it.
5: Spend time wishing for other people to be happy and well: Wednesday/Friday at T’ai Chi and Thursday morning before rising.
6: Smile and be friendly to the people you see today: done Thursday at the beach, Friday and Saturday at the park.
7: Give time to help a project or cause you care about: send out minutes and meeting reminder.

Shadow did very well in the crowd, calm even in the face of reactive dogs. Still skittish around anything with wheels, like strollers, skate boards, kids on scooters so it’s not just big trucks. Toward the end of dog group exercises she balked. Think she was just tired and “done.” Me too.

Machka happy birthday to your DH. Hope the weather favors a lovely ride.
Julie hope your long sleep was restorative and you continue to rest. Any surgery is a shock to the body, like Terri said, it needs time to recover.
KJ 1.5 million people in your town this weekend? :noway:
Carol thankful for your pharmacist’s alertness. Hope your recovery is swift and complete and that any pain is now gone.
@Shatszi in this thread replies don’t appear indented under the original post but follow in chronological order. Spoilers are used to conceal parts of posts that might not be of general interest. Not sure how to do on a phone, but on a laptop you highlight the text you want to conceal, then click the dropdown triangle next to the paragraph mark, and select “spoiler”.

Allie (((hugs))) yeah, I’d have been smiling on the other side of the room…

$100 to spend at the mall? Does anyone else think that could be one source of the issues?
Margaret LOL!
Rebecca I admire your ability to do without sugar in your coffee. I have not been motivated enough to abstain from sugar in my tea, but I have got it down to a carefully weighed 6 grams /cup

4 years??? Joe is getting frustrated ‘cuz his van has been in the shop for 4 weeks. SMH

your lawn service.
The very happiest of birthdays to you, dear Kim. Brava for the gift of days you’re giving your mom. What a relief it must be for her to have a day away with you. And Bravissima for the “chores” story. Wise beyond your years.

Time to snooze. . .

Lighter, lovelies!

Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD

July: leaner/stronger/kinder than June.
daily: sit with Joe:6 , weigh/wii: 7/0/0; steps>6704=8397, vits=7, log=7, CI<CO=7, CI<250<CO=4, Tumble=4, Shadow=9, mfp=7, outside=11, up hill=0, clean 10=1.5.
wkly: Sun: Mon: Tue:LD YH=1, Wed:TC=1, PW=1. Thurs: Fri:TC=1. Sat:PW=2. rX x4=1.
wt=1/31:141.3 2/28:142.4 3/31:145.3 4/30:141.5 5/31:142.4 6/30:141.5 7/31:140.2!!! 8/1:141.3 :P
mnthly: board mtg=, grant=, plan=, waist=42.0
bonus: AF=3 play= sew=

2021: choose to be leaner/stronger/kinder NOW

dlfk202000 · August 2021

Whidislander wrote: »

I have been busy organizing my family photos to put in my suitcase. I have an album for my mom and one for dad, plus a small childhood album. I need to locate the Christmas album I made, when I got the crazy idea to fuse both Lee and my childhood holiday photos together in one book. In date order! Lee thought I had lost my marbles because I messed up our photo albums to make that. But something I put out during the holidays, the Gossett Holiday Tome.

I am down 2 more lbs, and sometime this weekend, need to find my measuring tape to measure myself, so I have some sort of starting point. The tape measure will be my friend monthly, more than the pissy scale.
Hugs ladies!
Rebecca
Whidbey
Washington

Growing up, one of my best friend's last name was Gossett- Not sure if you have any relatives down here. Her dad's name was Carroll- he and my dad were very close friends until Carroll passed away. The day my dad passed away, her sister posted that she was sure our dad's were sitting in heaving catching up.
Debbie

Katla49 · August 2021

Machka9 · August 2021

auntiebk wrote: »

@Shatszi in this thread replies don’t appear indented under the original post but follow in chronological order. Spoilers are used to conceal parts of posts that might not be of general interest. Not sure how to do on a phone, but on a laptop you highlight the text you want to conceal, then click the dropdown triangle next to the paragraph mark, and select “spoiler”.
Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD

@Shatszi and @auntiebk ...

That is definitely one way to do a spoiler (and the one I usually use) but you can also type it.

square bracket spoiler square bracket ... your text ... square bracket /spoiler square bracket

[ .'spoiler'. ] your text [ .'/spoiler'. ] ... without the .' marks

Just a note ... although spoilers are used to conceal parts of posts that might not be of general interest to the readers of this thread, and that is a good use for them, it does not hide what you've written from public searches.

M in Oz

Machka9 · August 2021

We were cycling on the road at 9 am ...

Distance: 50.72km
Elevation: 200m
Moving Time: 2:48:07
Elapsed Time: 2:54:26
Speed: 18.1km/h 45.0km/h
Calories: 822

Machka in Oz

exermom · August 2021

Kim – happy birthday. What is a “pandemic pod”

Michele NC

bananasandoranges · August 2021

cityjaneLondon wrote: »

Rained on and off all day. Sometimes heavily. Glad the gutter man didn't start!

Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx

same weather here yesterday

Allie, total disappointment to spend so much energy and time to have such interactions

grandmallie wrote: »

I know Rori - dysfunctional to say the least oh well.. im going to see if she wants to take a ride with me in a bit to get a seafood dinner and if not ill go by myself.. and enjoy it

sounds like a good approach. What a bust that the kitchen then didn't work. Better though, than if it had been your GD misbehaving again.

Kim that's a great story.
I don't have the same experience, but in France people are late a lot. I can't change the culture but just by mostly fairly gently letting them know that I am there and aware and waiting, some people who were always late tend to be right on time, which for them, is major progress, after lifetime habits of being late.

Rebecca congratulations on the SV! woohoo!

evie1958 · August 2021

Karen in Virginia, we have quartz counters in our kitchen, I love them! Like Heather, these came with the house, but it was a new build and that was what was standard. I no longer need a separate "counter" for rolling out my pie pastry! Not that I make a lot of pies, but.... In all seriousness, I like them, they are pretty much maintenance free and I can put hot pots directly on them without fear of damage.
Kelly, smart to avoid the traffic! Wonderful for the Monarchs!
Allie, I don't know how you put up with some members of your family either, you have a heart of gold lady! Hoping that it's good news from Social Security! Unfortunate about the wait at the restaurant.
Pip, I wondered if that was the type of rag rug you were looking for, I have several, they were made by my maternal grandmother, genuine handmade Doukhabour rag rugs. They are woven, and would be relatively easy to do, if one had a loom. Alas, I do not....
Carole, I'm glad you had your surgery, hoping for a quick recovery period for you!
Margaret, I've heard that joke before, but it is definitely one that does not get old! (Grandfather taking grandson shopping)
Tracey, good for you for not donating more time to your work. You've gone way above and beyond!
Rori, so glad you have found someone who can give you a hand with the heavy lifting.
Kim, that story about your god kids was priceless!
Nothing to add today, hugs for those needing them, congrats to those celebrating and welcome to the newbies!

Evelyn, Vancouver Island where we got a bit of desperately needed rain! Could use a lot more, but will have to do with what we got for now....

trucker743 · August 2021

Julie, it’s very true that i don’t know how our relationship (my son and I) would have evolved over time. I meant what I said about my greatest involvement being with my three daughters because of distance and the closeness of having raised them. I had looked forward to hearing about his family as well as my other family members, but hadn’t envisioned anything like a yearly pilgrimage.

I think you also may have something in the idea of concerns about fiscal responsibility for me should I not have the resources. Actually, my eldest and her spouse are very well off. He is foreman for major construction efforts such as shopping malls and industrial complexes. She is a masters in nursing with a background in administration. I’m sure they would not leave me wanting were it to come to that. As it is, I’m a retired teamster with a pension as well as social security, and reasonable insurance available that covers everything with little copayment except dental and vision. I don’t think my future is too bleak.

My other two daughters might not be able to provide much financially, but they will both be capable of seeing to my needs physically should I need help.

Oh, Rori! This was an awful lot for you to deal with in such a brief interval. Be very gentle with yourself. Allow yourself all the time you can. I’m so glad you have your wonderful cat to snuggle with and confide in and laugh at. Take every opportunity you get to laugh.

Sharon Near Seattle

bananasandoranges · August 2021

slept ok, declined a last minute late invitation out yesterday (it was already 8:30 pm here).

still feeling unhappy about not being able to go freely in sun anymore.
sun is also good for health in many ways.

Good things done yesterday

food shopping
wee bit of cleaning
little walk
read some in depth article in paper (about how students in need are managing getting or not getting summer jobs, in and, in one case pre-pandemic)
eat some fresh fruit and veggies and soy protein and fibre
canceled trip to library and rested
aiming for balance in exchanges (telephone, mail or text)
listened to positive affirmations tape while sleeping
a wee bit of time on recumbent while on phone
being myself in conversations, speaking my mind in a peaceful way, even if I don't agree

Grateful
decent night of sleep
healthy food easily available
so quiet in the summer in august here
it's supposed to be nice out on days I booked for beach
comfy bed

Today

walk
tidy/clean
we'll see

bananasandoranges · August 2021

trucker743 wrote: »

Julie, it’s very true that i don’t know how our relationship (my son and I) would have evolved over time. I meant what I said about my greatest involvement being with my three daughters because of distance and the closeness of having raised them. I had looked forward to hearing about his family as well as my other family members, but hadn’t envisioned anything like a yearly pilgrimage.

I think you also may have something in the idea of concerns about fiscal responsibility for me should I not have the resources. Actually, my eldest and her spouse are very well off. He is foreman for major construction efforts such as shopping malls and industrial complexes. She is a masters in nursing with a background in administration. I’m sure they would not leave me wanting were it to come to that. As it is, I’m a retired teamster with a pension as well as social security, and reasonable insurance available that covers everything with little copayment except dental and vision. I don’t think my future is too bleak.

My other two daughters might not be able to provide much financially, but they will both be capable of seeing to my needs physically should I need help.

Oh, Rori! This was an awful lot for you to deal with in such a brief interval. Be very gentle with yourself. Allow yourself all the time you can. I’m so glad you have your wonderful cat to snuggle with and confide in and laugh at. Take every opportunity you get to laugh.

Sharon Near Seattle

It is wonderful that you had a nice moment with him, which I guess is never a given in such a context. That is worth a lot.

It's great that your teamster retirement and your daughters mean that you will likely be well taken care of.

It could (for example) be that he was deeply depressed and unbearable in the years after his adoptive parents died and that after meeting you he was emotionally moved (maybe in a good way but maybe he was shaken up too, and his spouse said, she couldn't take anymore upheavals, etc, etc. That is just an example of one possible scenario. People can be so emotionally fragile, especially these days in this long difficult pandemic. There is just no way of knowing. Sometimes people don't even know themselves why they make this or that choice.