WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR AUGUST 2021

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Replies

  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,694 Member
    dlfk202000 wrote: »
    exermom wrote: »
    Did stretching DVD today then walked about a mile around the parking lot. At least one of these days I’ll get my steps in! The plan for tomorrow is to do a step DVD

    You know, to me August in FL really isn’t all that bad. Maybe I’m just getting used to the heat living in NC. Maybe….I can talk Vince into coming down here for about 2 weeks next August. Well, I can hope, can’t I???

    Tracey – what a lovely couple, and your daughter looks beautiful

    Beth – when it rains, it pours! Feel better fast. Thank goodness those people at the church are helping with the meals! Can they maybe also help with cleaning?

    Allie – SCORE on that vacation. It may only be two days, but two days for free...lucky you. I’m sure Tom will watch Alfie

    Made HB eggs in the IP. Vince is putting together this space shuttle he made in ceramics 3 YEARS AGO (yes, years). Probably only because I hounded him to bring it down here.

    Looks cloudy outside, but that won’t deter me from laying out in the sun. Off to the pool…..

    Vince just got a text from Denise. a few days ago PJ tested positive for coronovirus. He can’t go to the day care for 14 days. I’m wondering who is watching him since she is probably still working since she’s been vaccinated. She said that Pete has a fever. Well, the last time we were there he said that he hadn’t been vaccinated. I was a little surprised but that’s his decision. Maria has scleroderma. I’m pretty sure Pete said that she’d been vaccinated...but still. I'm willing to bet she's watching PJ. Heaven forbid something happens to her, even minor.

    I know this is just the worry-wort mother in me, but I don’t know about this day care place. They were closed for 2 weeks in December because employees and children tested positive. Now PJ is positive and Denise said that 2 of the other kids along with a teacher have tested positive. Well, by the time we get back from FL, his 14 days of not being able to go there will be over.

    Debbie – maybe your mom feels guilty that she’s taking you away from your family and sees JoAnn moving in as a solution. Was that your childhood home? If so, maybe you know someone who you can spend the night with

    pip – your mom doesn’t look very happy in that picture, but she is a lovely looking lady

    Rebecca – you all look so happy! How wonderful!

    Flea – (((HUG))) Thanks for keeping us updated

    Ginny OH – I do hope you get good results from the test.

    Took a walk around the mall across the street. At least today I got my steps in!

    Michele in FL

    My mom knows how much I need to get away from here. She knows most of what is going on down here(but not all) so she knows I am there to help her but also a place that I can have a little peace.
    Yes, it is my childhood home but most of my friends have all moved away. I do have one friend that lives kind of close to mom but I wouldn't want to impose so much.

    Go to your mother, sit down over coffee (or tea?) and have a good talk about it.

    Sometimes it is easy to assume the other person knows everything ... but the other person has other things on his/her mind and doesn't have the time or energy to connect the dots. We've got to be explicit with people, especially busy people and people who are going through emotions like grief, depression, etc.


    M in Oz
  • exermom
    exermom Posts: 6,557 Member
    Can’t sleep so I’m here. Is there any place better to be?

    Beth – I have a warming tray at home, too. That’s why I’m unfamiliar with this one. I’m sure it’s not the broiler, but I’m not sure what it’s used for except storage. Maybe there’s another use? You have such great people helping you, but that little girl is the absolute best

    Michele who is going to try going to sleep. Maybe I’m just too relaxed at the pool????
  • dlfk202000
    dlfk202000 Posts: 3,272 Member
    Machka9 wrote: »
    dlfk202000 wrote: »
    exermom wrote: »
    Did stretching DVD today then walked about a mile around the parking lot. At least one of these days I’ll get my steps in! The plan for tomorrow is to do a step DVD

    You know, to me August in FL really isn’t all that bad. Maybe I’m just getting used to the heat living in NC. Maybe….I can talk Vince into coming down here for about 2 weeks next August. Well, I can hope, can’t I???

    Tracey – what a lovely couple, and your daughter looks beautiful

    Beth – when it rains, it pours! Feel better fast. Thank goodness those people at the church are helping with the meals! Can they maybe also help with cleaning?

    Allie – SCORE on that vacation. It may only be two days, but two days for free...lucky you. I’m sure Tom will watch Alfie

    Made HB eggs in the IP. Vince is putting together this space shuttle he made in ceramics 3 YEARS AGO (yes, years). Probably only because I hounded him to bring it down here.

    Looks cloudy outside, but that won’t deter me from laying out in the sun. Off to the pool…..

    Vince just got a text from Denise. a few days ago PJ tested positive for coronovirus. He can’t go to the day care for 14 days. I’m wondering who is watching him since she is probably still working since she’s been vaccinated. She said that Pete has a fever. Well, the last time we were there he said that he hadn’t been vaccinated. I was a little surprised but that’s his decision. Maria has scleroderma. I’m pretty sure Pete said that she’d been vaccinated...but still. I'm willing to bet she's watching PJ. Heaven forbid something happens to her, even minor.

    I know this is just the worry-wort mother in me, but I don’t know about this day care place. They were closed for 2 weeks in December because employees and children tested positive. Now PJ is positive and Denise said that 2 of the other kids along with a teacher have tested positive. Well, by the time we get back from FL, his 14 days of not being able to go there will be over.

    Debbie – maybe your mom feels guilty that she’s taking you away from your family and sees JoAnn moving in as a solution. Was that your childhood home? If so, maybe you know someone who you can spend the night with

    pip – your mom doesn’t look very happy in that picture, but she is a lovely looking lady

    Rebecca – you all look so happy! How wonderful!

    Flea – (((HUG))) Thanks for keeping us updated

    Ginny OH – I do hope you get good results from the test.

    Took a walk around the mall across the street. At least today I got my steps in!

    Michele in FL

    My mom knows how much I need to get away from here. She knows most of what is going on down here(but not all) so she knows I am there to help her but also a place that I can have a little peace.
    Yes, it is my childhood home but most of my friends have all moved away. I do have one friend that lives kind of close to mom but I wouldn't want to impose so much.

    Go to your mother, sit down over coffee (or tea?) and have a good talk about it.

    Sometimes it is easy to assume the other person knows everything ... but the other person has other things on his/her mind and doesn't have the time or energy to connect the dots. We've got to be explicit with people, especially busy people and people who are going through emotions like grief, depression, etc.


    M in Oz

    I am going to talk to her next time I am up there. I found out about her plan about the time we were leaving and we still had company so not the time to talk to her about it.
    That is great insight- I need to use it when dealing with dh!! That is a big problem with us- we don't talk at all so just assuming what he is thinking might be a lot worse than what he is thinking or NOT thinking is more like it.
    THANKS!!
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,793 Member
    edited August 2021
    Margaret, Katla, - Thanks for the feedback. I will still play with it. My son, who is great at graphic design, is coming this next weekend, so I will ask him. I want it to be in the same design 'family' as my last cover. Unfortunately, that photo processing system was on my old tablet. I could resurrect it, I suppose. The ribbon, which was a random choice, because it fitted the photo, is meant to draw my father, mother and myself in a loop. I have slightly blurred my mother to emphasis my father’s gaze. I hope the faces are distorted enough not to be recognisable. My brother and grandmother are obscured. Maybe it's too much. ??
    Need more feedback and experimenting. I hope my son can help. ;):)

    Family popping over this afternoon. I'm torn between wanting to get on with my editing this morning, and playing house with a bit of tidying and baking. It is a Bank Holiday, so taking the time off wouldn't be a crime. :p I will still exercise. The house is topsy-turvy from the painter, stuff everywhere, so I hope we can be outside. I will have to get chairs out of the shed.
    DH out all day at cricket. I baked a Spinach and Feta Pie yesterday and cooked some baby potatoes, so dinner is all prepared.

    I did not sleep well last night. Too much going on.

    Commiserations to everyone affected by covid ramifications. :'(
    Hope everyone we know stays safe from Ida. <3
    Much love to Flea. Chemo does wear you down. I struggled towards the last treatment. Fell over in the street while shopping. Lovely people rushed to my aid. Good news about the tumours. <3

    Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx
  • kizanne2
    kizanne2 Posts: 123 Member
    I sit here working at 2 am with school at 8am.

    The sheet audacity that they think I can do more....

    Well I am going to have to find time tomorrow to call the real estate company. We own our old house that is just sitting. It has issues but I'm going to put it up for auction. With that money I should be able to almost pay this house off. Then I will quit. Even if they decide Monday to 'uphold' our agreement that I would have no internal testing it is obvious that my work is unappreciated and it will just continue to happen all year.

    It breaks my heart for the kids. I already have so many that I have been helping individually and bonding with but I feeling done. The do it for the kids just isn't enough anymore for me to give up most of my personal time and stress eat for 9/12 months of the year.

    Prayers for anyone in Ida's path.
  • auntiebk
    auntiebk Posts: 2,620 Member
    "Get to do"s and "chose well"s
    Chose well: BP, deliver goat cheese, livestream church,
    Bonus: coffee scone visit with Re, walk with T and Shadow.
    Get to do: take BP, dogs to powerline, flagger course progress, USE those torture bands/do that BB&B video, call S, fire district: research NFPA, grant NIMS requirements, ongoing: input 2019 call sheets into NFIRS, work with chief on equipment letter, substance abuse policy, NFIRS mutual aid and other missing details, likewise Lee skills/tasks, ask for boots donator contact info, appreciation letter or certificate to boots donator, index mutual aid files; watch STAS Day 20, declutter sideboard, learn new dances (Tequila Little Time, Homesick, Nothing but You, A Little Less Broken, Blame it on my beating heart,; Do Your Thing, practice dances: One Margarita, I’m so used to being broke, All Night, Pure Movies to Wine, Beer, Whiskey, I ain’t never gonna love nobody but Cornell Crawford (Alley cat),); finish mulching flowerbed, invest another 10 minutes in prepping living trust, Freddie’s for complete series TDAP <$48, get Shingrix vaccine, find and configure a screen time popup, figure out where to plant the last of the naked lady bulbs, and soon as it warms up above 50 and dries out below 60% humidity I’ll tape and spray paint those rusted areas of Aunt Elsie’s stove, ask Te about GB’s FD firetruck tax levy – contacts, media, advocate???, Reward: inventory seeds, plan this fall’s garden, wishlist replenishments (Milena F1 orange peppers and beit alpha cukes next year).
    August
    30: Give away something to help those who don’t have as much as you: gather the thrift store donations and deliver them.

    Machka lovely table.
    Tracey love all the smiles, what a joyous celebration. :love: the grandpup, Can you teach her to Sit or Lie Down on command? Strangers would be less fearful if you could stop her rushing in for love ;)
    Beth can your son drive you to the ER? DVT so scary, can’t get an ultrasound over the phone… yet… ;}
    Katla can you start checking out breeders now for one that might have a litter in October that would be ready to go home with you in November? Sorry about your knee.
    Vicki is there any end in sight to your 12 hour workdays?
    Kay prayers for your family both in the path of the storm, and those evacuated.
    Heather I admire your spirit of adventure and experimentation: song writing and photo tweaking art. Wow!
    Debbie the trailer idea sounds like a good one, as does Machka's advice for clear communication. Couragia!
    Pip, what Katla said. Your beautiful mom was brave to leave him. Never easy, harder back in the day.
    Flea painful reminder. :cry: Ditto Beth’s prayers for increasing stamina and disappearing tumors.
    Ginny sorry to hear of your exposure, ditto Debbie’s wish for negative results.
    Michele sorry to hear about PJ’s positive test. Worrisome. ((hugs))

    Air a little cooler, a little less smoky today. Made for a lovely walk with Shadow and T. Nothing else accomplished, and now too sleepy to do anything.

    Lighter, lovelies!
    f8qt1s098sxm.gifBarbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
    August: leaner/stronger/kinder than July.
    daily: sit with Joe: 27, weigh/wii: 29/0/0; steps>6704=9568 vits=28, log=29, CI<CO=28, CI<250<CO=22, Tumble=20, Shadow=28, mfp=30, outside=34, up hill=33, clean 10=23.
    wkly: Sun: Mon: Tue:LD YH=1, Wed:TC=2, PW=4. Thurs: Fri:TC=2. Sat:PW=4. rX x4=4.
    wt=1/31:141.3 2/28:142.4 3/31:145.3 4/30:141.5 5/31:142.4 6/30:141.5 7/31:140.2!!! 8/1:141.3 8/8:140.4 8/15:141.5 :rage:
    mnthly: board mtg=1, grant=, plan=, waist=42.0
    bonus: AF:18 play= sew=
    2021: choose to be leaner/stronger/kinder NOW
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,694 Member
    edited August 2021
    dlfk202000 wrote: »
    Machka9 wrote: »
    dlfk202000 wrote: »
    exermom wrote: »
    Did stretching DVD today then walked about a mile around the parking lot. At least one of these days I’ll get my steps in! The plan for tomorrow is to do a step DVD

    You know, to me August in FL really isn’t all that bad. Maybe I’m just getting used to the heat living in NC. Maybe….I can talk Vince into coming down here for about 2 weeks next August. Well, I can hope, can’t I???

    Tracey – what a lovely couple, and your daughter looks beautiful

    Beth – when it rains, it pours! Feel better fast. Thank goodness those people at the church are helping with the meals! Can they maybe also help with cleaning?

    Allie – SCORE on that vacation. It may only be two days, but two days for free...lucky you. I’m sure Tom will watch Alfie

    Made HB eggs in the IP. Vince is putting together this space shuttle he made in ceramics 3 YEARS AGO (yes, years). Probably only because I hounded him to bring it down here.

    Looks cloudy outside, but that won’t deter me from laying out in the sun. Off to the pool…..

    Vince just got a text from Denise. a few days ago PJ tested positive for coronovirus. He can’t go to the day care for 14 days. I’m wondering who is watching him since she is probably still working since she’s been vaccinated. She said that Pete has a fever. Well, the last time we were there he said that he hadn’t been vaccinated. I was a little surprised but that’s his decision. Maria has scleroderma. I’m pretty sure Pete said that she’d been vaccinated...but still. I'm willing to bet she's watching PJ. Heaven forbid something happens to her, even minor.

    I know this is just the worry-wort mother in me, but I don’t know about this day care place. They were closed for 2 weeks in December because employees and children tested positive. Now PJ is positive and Denise said that 2 of the other kids along with a teacher have tested positive. Well, by the time we get back from FL, his 14 days of not being able to go there will be over.

    Debbie – maybe your mom feels guilty that she’s taking you away from your family and sees JoAnn moving in as a solution. Was that your childhood home? If so, maybe you know someone who you can spend the night with

    pip – your mom doesn’t look very happy in that picture, but she is a lovely looking lady

    Rebecca – you all look so happy! How wonderful!

    Flea – (((HUG))) Thanks for keeping us updated

    Ginny OH – I do hope you get good results from the test.

    Took a walk around the mall across the street. At least today I got my steps in!

    Michele in FL

    My mom knows how much I need to get away from here. She knows most of what is going on down here(but not all) so she knows I am there to help her but also a place that I can have a little peace.
    Yes, it is my childhood home but most of my friends have all moved away. I do have one friend that lives kind of close to mom but I wouldn't want to impose so much.

    Go to your mother, sit down over coffee (or tea?) and have a good talk about it.

    Sometimes it is easy to assume the other person knows everything ... but the other person has other things on his/her mind and doesn't have the time or energy to connect the dots. We've got to be explicit with people, especially busy people and people who are going through emotions like grief, depression, etc.


    M in Oz

    I am going to talk to her next time I am up there. I found out about her plan about the time we were leaving and we still had company so not the time to talk to her about it.
    That is great insight- I need to use it when dealing with dh!! That is a big problem with us- we don't talk at all so just assuming what he is thinking might be a lot worse than what he is thinking or NOT thinking is more like it.
    THANKS!!

    Here's a little "joke"/"humorous story" about assuming what another person is thinking. I read it several years ago and got a laugh out of it, but it has a ring of truth.

    THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN
    https://www.et.byu.edu/~tom/jokes/Differ_men_women.html


    I've been told I'm unexpectedly blunt. I'm often quiet when I'm around people, but when I want to say something, I just say it, right to the point with none of the social niceties. I've often wondered if I'm somewhere on the autistic spectrum which might account for that. But I don't like guessing what people might be thinking and I'm not one to sit and wait for someone to tell me, so I'll ask right out.

    I have had to learn some of those social niceties along the way because some people seem to like them.


    But with regard to assuming what people are thinking ...

    In most situations, if I'm interested in the conversation, I pay attention and chances are I'll blurt out lots of questions and/or comments (to the point, apparently, that people feel a bit interrogated, so they tell me, and I've been asked why I question everything they say. It's because I'm interested!!)

    If I'm not particularly interested, I go quiet. I'll have one small part of my brain on the conversation so I know when to say, "mmm-hmm" but the rest of my brain will be on my Things To Do list. A few times I have actually had to ask the person to repeat the last couple sentences because my mind is so much on my Things To Do list, I've missed an "mmm-hmm" or two and the conversation has stopped! Oops!

    I suppose people could make all sorts of assumptions about what I'm thinking in those situations. I wonder if they'd guess that I'm thinking I need to send an email with instructions about how to access a shared drive to someone, I need to find out if I can take over management of an inactive Facebook page, and I need to check a couple cycling routes and then put some promotional words around them.

    M in Oz
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    Barbara — Thank you for the suggestion of looking for breeders who will be selling puppies in the fall. It is an excellent idea.
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,793 Member
    Katla - I was going to say the exact same thing as Barbara. These days there is a long waiting list for desired breeds. You can't even just walk in and take a rescue these days. All sorts of checks. My DDIL had to wait a long time for her labradoodle. The first litter did not provide enough puppies, even though she had her name down for ages, so it was another 5 months.
    Best of luck on your search. <3

    Tidied up, shopped for clotted cream, made 15 scones. I also bought ice creams for the kids.
    Now a short nap before they arrive.

    Love Heather UK xxxxxx
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    dlfk202000 wrote: »
    bananasandoranges wrote: »
    dlfk202000 wrote: »
    I tried to read and catch up last night ,all I have missed since Friday morning, but my eyes were too tired.
    The little family reunion was great- too short of course but enjoyed every minute of it.
    My cousin and I went in and helped mom at the food bank/food program- up at 5 was a little rough but was fun to have more time with Erin.
    The only rough part was I heard from my cousin then my husband(but mom hasn't told me) that she has decided to have a friend move in with her. When I was up there last time she said that JoAnn was going to get a tiny house and move it on the property which I was fine with that. Now, with JoAnn moving in the house, I will not have a room when I go up to help or just visit my mom. JoAnn talks loud and non stop when I have been around her. Dad was always glad when she went home. I will be sleeping on the couch and have no time with just mom and I. No clue where we would sleep if dh and son also went up or if any other family went to visit mom.
    I know, I am being selfish but it was just a shock. I had planned on being up there a lot more than I have and eventually be there half the time. That won't happen if she moves in.
    She is moving in because the place she has been living the owner's kids are going to sell it- she lived and worked on the property but then the owner died and then her husband died. She has no kids.
    She is good company for mom and drives her to shop when she wants. Mom can still drive but JoAnn prefers to drive.
    I don't know when or even if this is happening but was just a shock. I had finally been able to have time just one on one with mom and now that is going to be gone. Her choice and I just have to go with it.

    Going to church in a bit- don't think DH is going with me- he is tired plus he doesn't like that no one wears masks,even though in that town it is mandatory.
    After that, if it isn't too hot, I will do a little gardening- I did water last night- everything was dry- 105 on our drive home yesterday afternoon. Not supposed to be quite as hot today but we will see.

    On a good note, beings we weren't here to put more cat food out Friday night(they got fed at noon), looks like the coon family have moved on. Maybe lack of free meal or the two pit bulls in the yard behind them that chased them up the trees a few times that helped- just glad they are gone.

    Ok- time to catch up on reading here while having my tea then get ready for church. Just over 40 min til I have to leave

    Debbie
    Napa Valley,CA

    I'm sorry about that. I guess you could tell your mom how you feel. maybe there are ways you can work out one on one time with your mom. It's not quite the same but my dad remarried quite late and I never felt I could have a non-surveyed conversation with him with his 2nd wife. I was finally able to negotiate going out for coffee or meals or something with him, until quite late in his life. it became harder and harder as he got older. I felt quite comfortable spending time with my dad and talking with him but not so when he was with 2nd wife...

    if she is good company for your mom with no down side ---- that seems ok, for your mom - it must be hard to be alone. I'm sure it was good for my dad to have someone to love and who loved him for the last 20 years of his life even if she was not really my cup of tea and if I didn't feel that comfortable with him. but I only visited 1x a year (since I live on another continent). I surely would have stayed over and visited more had I felt comfortable at his place like before - my siblings too. if you really had plans to be there half time -- that won't happen. - it might be worth speaking to your mom about that...

    if the room is unused, it's understandable that they choose to make use of it. but if they have means to build a tiny house - and you intend to be there half - time -- that is all worth discussing. these are important things to look at together.

    Thanks for the insight-
    I know mom thinks it will all be great, no downside.
    She even said she guessed she would have to learn to like hockey(mom has never ever had any interest in any sports,except the Olympics.
    I mentioned to DH about getting a small motor home to have up there for me to have a space and he said that was too drastic. He doesn't think/realize that I am serious about being up there a lot more. I have no reason to be down here really. Doesn't seem to matter to him either way.
    I don't know what will happen- they may try it and it won't work out. Yes they are friends but it is different to live with someone who is so different.
    It is her choice and I just will have to go with it. It would have been nice to hear it from her instead of second hand.

    If it's second hand it might be worth checking. On the upside, if she has good company that is possibly likely to reduce worries about her sometime on down the road. If she has minor aiments this person can be there. It's also good for her mental health, presumably to be with another person often, not isolated. It's true that good friends and cohabitating are 2 different things! it could work for some months and then not... my sister had her best friend and past roommate (from 20s) rent a room for some months several years back (maybe late 30s or so) and it really didn't work out but they have remained good friends thank goodness. they might well have had a cool spell after their 2nd cohabitating experience, but eventually made it through. You could try renting a motor home for a year or some months (or a week) to try it.
    It might be cheaper and more comfortable to rent an airbnb nearby. When caring for a sister once I rented a car and airbnb nearby. It was fairly nice to do, and avoided certain conflicts that would surely have occurred had I stayed at my kind, but a bit controlling other sister's home!

    Drastic my depend on resources. For some people they are ok financially at some point and a few hundred or thousand at some point doesn't really make a difference. For others it's more tight or somewhere imbetween/iffy. If the funds are there, that's surely a valid thing to try.
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    Ginny I'm sorry you were a close contact. a friend had that...when he got his 1st vaccination! his doctor called a day or few days later to say he had covid. my friend didn't have it but he had to spend 10 days cloistering himself from others in his home. He had found it a bit depressing at the time. During lockdown 1, pre-test availability, I was twice diagnosed with "possible" COVID. The 1st time less probable than the 2nd. The 2nd time I stayed in for 6 days or so (recommended time at the time to see if I had fever arising), without putting my head out the door. I hope your test is negative. Do you have to warn people you were in contact with? Protocol for that kind of thing is always changing. Here a close contact of a close contact is not necessarily considered a contact.


    FLEA, Sending you healing thoughts. That is good news about the 1st scan you remind me/me of which organ the initial tumor is in? I somehow missed the 1st introduction of this subject. I am on and off the board depending on work and other pressing situations, (and life) and sometimes skimming. Sometimes I'm able to read all almost all ) if I read every day or two but if I miss a few days and there are 200 posts- I skim, and then I see the follow up discussion but not the initial point in detail. Sorry about that question if it's disturbing.
  • csofled
    csofled Posts: 3,022 Member
    🌞👒😽😆
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    Machka9 wrote: »
    dlfk202000 wrote: »
    exermom wrote: »
    Did stretching DVD today then walked about a mile around the parking lot. At least one of these days I’ll get my steps in! The plan for tomorrow is to do a step DVD

    You know, to me August in FL really isn’t all that bad. Maybe I’m just getting used to the heat living in NC. Maybe….I can talk Vince into coming down here for about 2 weeks next August. Well, I can hope, can’t I???

    Tracey – what a lovely couple, and your daughter looks beautiful

    Beth – when it rains, it pours! Feel better fast. Thank goodness those people at the church are helping with the meals! Can they maybe also help with cleaning?

    Allie – SCORE on that vacation. It may only be two days, but two days for free...lucky you. I’m sure Tom will watch Alfie

    Made HB eggs in the IP. Vince is putting together this space shuttle he made in ceramics 3 YEARS AGO (yes, years). Probably only because I hounded him to bring it down here.

    Looks cloudy outside, but that won’t deter me from laying out in the sun. Off to the pool…..

    Vince just got a text from Denise. a few days ago PJ tested positive for coronovirus. He can’t go to the day care for 14 days. I’m wondering who is watching him since she is probably still working since she’s been vaccinated. She said that Pete has a fever. Well, the last time we were there he said that he hadn’t been vaccinated. I was a little surprised but that’s his decision. Maria has scleroderma. I’m pretty sure Pete said that she’d been vaccinated...but still. I'm willing to bet she's watching PJ. Heaven forbid something happens to her, even minor.

    I know this is just the worry-wort mother in me, but I don’t know about this day care place. They were closed for 2 weeks in December because employees and children tested positive. Now PJ is positive and Denise said that 2 of the other kids along with a teacher have tested positive. Well, by the time we get back from FL, his 14 days of not being able to go there will be over.

    Debbie – maybe your mom feels guilty that she’s taking you away from your family and sees JoAnn moving in as a solution. Was that your childhood home? If so, maybe you know someone who you can spend the night with

    pip – your mom doesn’t look very happy in that picture, but she is a lovely looking lady

    Rebecca – you all look so happy! How wonderful!

    Flea – (((HUG))) Thanks for keeping us updated

    Ginny OH – I do hope you get good results from the test.

    Took a walk around the mall across the street. At least today I got my steps in!

    Michele in FL

    My mom knows how much I need to get away from here. She knows most of what is going on down here(but not all) so she knows I am there to help her but also a place that I can have a little peace.
    Yes, it is my childhood home but most of my friends have all moved away. I do have one friend that lives kind of close to mom but I wouldn't want to impose so much.

    Go to your mother, sit down over coffee (or tea?) and have a good talk about it.

    Sometimes it is easy to assume the other person knows everything ... but the other person has other things on his/her mind and doesn't have the time or energy to connect the dots. We've got to be explicit with people, especially busy people and people who are going through emotions like grief, depression, etc.


    M in Oz


    Good point! if your mom realised you are thinking of making her place your half-time home, she may prefer half-time with her daughter than full time with her friend (or maybe not). It is worth discussing and would be a shame to pass by something you both wish for if that is the case. There is the risk of disappointment, which could be experienced as rejection, (painful maybe) but that is the risk of putting ourselves out there and saying what we want. It seems worthwhile risk if speaking to a person who is kind and understanding; On the other hand if she opts out of the friend deal and you are not 100% sure of wanting to go half time to her place, you might feel super-obliged even if finally life evolves otherwise and you no longer wish to do that.
    also you said that you were thinking of doing that at some point... she could plan to live with her friend for a trial period and you could see how it goes, though that may or may not be very fair for her friend.... (I don't know if I'd like being a trial roommate, but in reality those situations are always trials -if they don't end up working out!).
    Is it just a 2br with a living room and kitchen or are there other rooms that can be converted to spare bedroom area (finished attic, finished basement, finished garage, closed mezzanine, put sliding divider into living room...They may be way cheaper than nice quality RV!
    When a young teen my mom bought a house that had 4 br, for 5 people. My mom wisely had a wooden wall built in one room with 2 doors (dividing 1br into 2) so I had a tiny but private bedroom my 1st years till our older siblings soon moved. Thank goodness!

    Living in city where spaces are so expensive I know there are many Flexi-options for small spaces... you basically need a space where you can sleep, sit, maybe read, and have a window, but not necessarily a lot more to start...till it becomes more half-time.
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    cityjaneLondon wrote: »
    Kate UK - GREAT day!!!! :p What fun.

    I decided to lay the table indoors as it's a bit cool and cloudy out. We can open the French windows. Probably will drink tea, but I have some AF champagne in the fridge. (My son is a recovering alcoholic 3+ years)

    16n816mnvkyj.jpg

    I felt I had to lay the table as I couldn't settle to a nap. Feel better now. :)

    Love Heather UK xxxxxx

    Looking and hearing about that it makes me think of a friend who lived in the country, very remote on his own. He used to set the table every evening for breakfast. I find that kind of nice. Kind of BnB-ish in one's own home. I guess the pretty setting (rather than nap) made me think of that, don't know why! :)
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,361 Member
    OregonMother wrote: »
    Beginning to come out of post-treatment day stupor. This week has been rough. I am still not at full, or even half energy, but I have managed to do a few things around the house 5-10 minutes at a time. I hate this. I do not do couch potato well. At. All.

    I've been reading along on my phone -- easy to do when lying down -- but not logged in, so can't respond as I read, and I have forgotten almost everything. Just know that I am praying for you when you mention hard times -- falls, hurt knees, family relationships -- like I said -- I read it, it goes through my mind, and then is gone.

    Have I mentioned how much I hate this??? :wink:

    But I am half way through treatment. Next treatment cycle is a different drug, so I am hoping for less brain fog and fatigue. We shall see. Neuropathy is a real danger, so I've already ordered my ice mittens and ice socks, per my oncologists directions, to wear while receiving treatment. Good news is this part of the treatment will be over by the end of October. Bad news, as my oncologist reminded me, is that I will never be done with some kind of treatment. That sent me reeling for a few hours, but I needed the reminder. This will never be over, until it's over. :disappointed:

    Still, one stage of treatment at a time. That's all I can emotionally process right now.

    Good news is that the primary tumor has almost disappeared completely. I really have to dig for it to find it. The oncologist has ordered an ultrasound to verify the progress. She also said that if the primary tumor is responding this well, the other little spots in my vertebrae and rib are likely also responding well, and they were miniscule in size compared to the primary tumor, so I will hold on to that potential good news.

    Everyone take care.

    Flea
    Willamette Valley, OR

    {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hug Oregonmother}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    Café moments
    Lovely conversations at café today and yesterday. I went to work early. I was the 2st person at café on Sunday morning! First spoke with my high school philosophy teacher friend, M. (philosophy is an obligator class in last year of high school here. She works in a remote area with not so great students but she prefers that to working in close suburbs with troubled, and more troublesome students!) We always have nice talks. Then my graphic designer/teacher friend, V., just back from vacation and fridge empty came for breakfast with her little family and we chatted too. Today M. again then then soon after, B. an interesting specialist in some kind of complicated research was there and we talked about work dynamics. With B and M and V we are all teachers (different types of institutions, and statuses) so we all have a fair amount to exchange about, at least for a few minutes here and there!

    Slows up work but brightens the day. M will start school soon so will be there less, pretty soon.

    Skipping breakfast seems to work for me when I just am dragging self to café. (I think I'd be too hungry if working and running around much). then coming back from breakfast at midday seems to work. Time goes by quickly.

    T'day:
    -1.15 min on recumbent, 15 min cleaning, a few push ups! (I find push ups incredibly hard!)
    -call Office place, hospital, and administrative colleague D.
    - Finish reading chapter. (15 pages)
    - Work on writing around that

    Wish me luck. I tend to get tired or unmotivated at some point in day and lose drive or energy.
    I'm working on developing changing habits, going back to strong discipline and drive that I've had previously. :)

    already done
    -read half chapter and took notes CHECK
    - tracked lunch-time breakfast CHECK
    - called L.
    - wrote to friends O (work related) and Y (just for fun) CHECK


    I have been tracking mostly these past 2 weeks. I missed totally tracking on at least 2 days, but going in the right direction.


  • Anniesquats100
    Anniesquats100 Posts: 3,306 Member
    I never set the table early. Teddy doesn't shed, but I had too many shedding dogs to trust that the dishes would stay clean. That hair gets everywhere. Same problem with open shelving.

    (((Flea))) (((Beth))) and little (((PJ))) and everyone else with troubles

    Nothing much going on here. I need to unclog the drain so I can dye my hair. And make a few appointments. And get my mom to make an appointment with her cardiologist.

    My Monday zoom meditation group is getting to be too serious about Bhuddism and less about the book study. I hate to quit because I need the social interaction. But it's becoming less and less enjoyable. They want me to bring some reading to share today. The lady who pushed all the sharing often misses the actual meetings.

    Anyway, I'm lucky to have such small problems.

    Annie in Delaware

  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,153 Member
    Morning ladies
    Ive picked up Homer i did stop at the garage and as i go to start the car up praise be the check engine light wasnt on.. im chalking it up to bad gas..it seems to be running fine right now..
    Did stop and saw my daughter she was just getting to work,she is looking so cute,looks like she swallowed a basketball lol,she said Kyle felt the little guy kick yesterday ..
    Kyle isnt happy with second hand stuff,im guessing he was brought up on that as was I and my children and he doesnt want his kids being brought up that way..so I told Tracy just keep stuff on the QT and dont tell him everything..they dont make enough money to have brand new everything and with a baby they outgrow stuff so quick its pointless so I told her just keep it under her hat..
    Going to get garbage together today and clean out fridge and get pancake mixes together.
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    ANNIE what book are you studying in meditation group?
    Do you have meditation online? Or just studying (buddhism or meditation texts?)
    Maybe you can find a book/text that straddles 2 areas, or focusses on your interest so you can "reign it in"?
    There are lots of non-religious (non "buddhist") approaches to buddhist practice (meditation) or philosophy/texts.
    Even though it's become a or many religions, (totally different practices and beliefs in many different places in world).
    If you are christian and the religious aspect of buddhism is disturbing there are surely some books that straddle between christian and buddhism, and other books/texts that are about "secular buddhism" (a big area!)

    What do you share about?
    When I participated in sharing groups in meditation group (about 20+ years ago!), there was either
    -general sharing about what's going on - sometimes all would share and sometimes less, and we would respond in relation to the issue(s) that arise. (some I remember are: parent care, disturbed about killing insects/animals and people being killed in wars; people's having trouble dealing with their own moods; grieving..concentration, kindness..and many more.

    - short text or something and beginning of sharing almost always on personal level about personal life choices, issues, starting in connection with some reading...

    Part of it was just connecting with others!
  • bananasandoranges
    bananasandoranges Posts: 2,410 Member
    Was just about to get on recumbent and hit my foot moving the thing a bit, now it's throbbing. nothing serious. put iced fruit on it( not ice in fridge) for 20 min and then I'm going onto recumbant.

    did about 13 girly pushups today. 7 and 6 I think. not a lot but last week it was 3 and 3. push ups are so hard right now. :D
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    Flea – I am happy that you are now home, and that you’ve had some encouraging news from your oncologist. :star:

    Ginny – I watch the weather channel and am glad to be far away from the Mississippi River. Our son has an old friend who lives in New Orleans. I hope they and their neighbors are safe :heart:

    Barbie – Congrats on your computer being fixed!!! :bigsmile:

    Michele – We have a drawer below our oven & use it for a broiler pan, and lids for various pots and pans. :flowerforyou:

    Heather – Who will recognize your parents after all these years? Does that matter? Have you consulted with your brother about it? The two of you are the most important in my mind. :heart: I like the view of the garden from your lovely table. :star:

    Barbara & Heather – DH has connected to the Mt. Hood Keeshond Club. We will contact them when we get back from our trip to Virginia. Hopefully they will know who has puppies available. :bigsmile:

    Machka – Happy first day of spring!!! Daffodils are perfect. :flowerforyou:


    I have two things on my agenda for this morning and am not sure which will be first. Yoga is always a good morning, but getting the car in for a tune up is also important.

    Katla in NW Oregon
  • Peach1948
    Peach1948 Posts: 2,473 Member
    :)
  • kevrit
    kevrit Posts: 4,394 Member
    ✌️
  • Anniesquats100
    Anniesquats100 Posts: 3,306 Member
    Julie We were reading Why Bhuddism is True by Robert Wright, which is secular Bhuddism, in my humble opinion. We have one guy in the group who takes the conversation off on a tangent, so progress through the book got very slow. This week they gave up on the book to do sharing, where everyone brings in a random short reading to discuss. It's not defined any more than that.

    We meet on zoom, which works pretty well for meditating together. We usually do a thirty minute sit, but lately we've done a chant, too. The chant is another thing I'm not too fond of.

    I'm not Christian, but I have reservations when things get metaphysical. I'm in it for the meditation and the benefits to my brain. I need all the help I can get 😊.

    I'm also reading One Dharma by Joseph Goldstein that looks at what beliefs are common to all kinds of Bhuddism. The more I read, the less I feel like a genuine Bhuddist.

    Annie in Delaware
  • dlfk202000
    dlfk202000 Posts: 3,272 Member
    Machka9 wrote: »
    [

    Here's a little "joke"/"humorous story" about assuming what another person is thinking. I read it several years ago and got a laugh out of it, but it has a ring of truth.

    THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN
    https://www.et.byu.edu/~tom/jokes/Differ_men_women.html


    I've been told I'm unexpectedly blunt. I'm often quiet when I'm around people, but when I want to say something, I just say it, right to the point with none of the social niceties. I've often wondered if I'm somewhere on the autistic spectrum which might account for that. But I don't like guessing what people might be thinking and I'm not one to sit and wait for someone to tell me, so I'll ask right out.

    I have had to learn some of those social niceties along the way because some people seem to like them.


    But with regard to assuming what people are thinking ...

    In most situations, if I'm interested in the conversation, I pay attention and chances are I'll blurt out lots of questions and/or comments (to the point, apparently, that people feel a bit interrogated, so they tell me, and I've been asked why I question everything they say. It's because I'm interested!!)

    If I'm not particularly interested, I go quiet. I'll have one small part of my brain on the conversation so I know when to say, "mmm-hmm" but the rest of my brain will be on my Things To Do list. A few times I have actually had to ask the person to repeat the last couple sentences because my mind is so much on my Things To Do list, I've missed an "mmm-hmm" or two and the conversation has stopped! Oops!

    I suppose people could make all sorts of assumptions about what I'm thinking in those situations. I wonder if they'd guess that I'm thinking I need to send an email with instructions about how to access a shared drive to someone, I need to find out if I can take over management of an inactive Facebook page, and I need to check a couple cycling routes and then put some promotional words around them.

    M in Oz

    I am the total opposite of you and that is a huge problem- I never speak up and so I just put up with a lot that I shouldn't. It took me almost 20 yrs to confront dh on a major issue. I tried before that by writing letters and leaving them for him- he threw them away and never mentioned it. Finally I told him we really needed to talk. I got answers but sadly, the issue has not changed.

    I tell people, I am like Rex, from Toy Story. I don't like confrontation. So I get walked on all the time because I don't speak up for myself. I keep everything inside and just get mad and little things start to irritate me even more.
  • dlfk202000
    dlfk202000 Posts: 3,272 Member
    edited August 2021
    Julie-Thanks for your insight- I do know it will be good for JoAnn to be there and if she did the tiny house like she had planned, I think that would work better- would give each of them their own space when needed. Mom has changed her mind a few times- before she wanted to be alone, maybe now that it has been 8 months she is rethinking that but the bigger part is mom's loving heart- she knows JoAnn has to move when the property she is living on sells and she wants to help her out. Mom is a caring person- will do things for everyone else and not think about herself. Even though JoAnn has money, mom isnt even planning on charging her anything to stay there. Mom is on a fixed income but still does for others- like the garden- she paid for all the seed($300 I think is what she spent this spring)
    , and everything and now when the veggies are in, all the neighbors can just come and pick things for free.
    My friend that I used to walk with has a pop up trailer they are thinking about selling- I am getting information on that and will talk to mom about moving it up there when JoAnn moves in.
    Just trying to think things out. I am sure mom hasn't even given it a thought about where I , or my sisters, or any other guests will sleep when they visit.
  • ginnytez
    ginnytez Posts: 1,411 Member
    Michele-sorry to hear PJ got positive test. I know they are saying kids don’t get it as bad but I seem to worry about my grandkids more than all of the adults.

    Beth- the flower gift is precious.

    Covid
    Got in for testing this morning. They did throat swab rather than nasal (I think either one is fairly nasty but necessary). Should have results tomorrow. Have to isolate until I receive results. If positive quarantine for a total of 10 days starting from first day of symptoms and have to be fever free for 24 hours with improving symptoms. If I do have Covid I (so far) have very mild symptoms (good result from vaccine maybe?). Just keep feeling like on verge of sinus infections, some aches and headache. Spent today being lazy-keeping an eye on emails but not working today. Will actually work from home tomorrow unless I get sick. This a a good learning experience of how easily all of this can spread

    Thankfully a bit cooler here today but still muggy. I am hoping a temporary fix for ac is put in this evening to help cut down on humidity.

    Ginny in Ohio

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